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00:00I'm bored.
00:14According to Mr. Trudeau's will, your eldest daughter, Miss Shelby Trudeau,
00:20must be married by five o'clock today, or she loses her inheritance.
00:25That unladylike girl is not my daughter.
00:28Bad enough, I'm her stepmother.
00:30Right, and hello.
00:31We want Shelby to no-show.
00:33That's the way we get everything.
00:47I'm Sergeant Shelby Trudeau.
00:49I'm here to claim my inheritance.
00:52Well, look who it is, the prodigal sister.
00:54I'm dressed in your old uniform.
00:56Pathetic.
00:57Still trying to play hero.
00:59I'm in the Army Reserve now, Cece.
01:01I was doing weekend drills with my unit.
01:04The will, please.
01:07The Army Reserve.
01:09Should have just died in the field like a good little soldier.
01:12No one would have missed you.
01:13Shut your trap before I shut it for you.
01:17Look, you don't have to respect me, but don't you dare speak about soldiers dying in vain on the battlefield.
01:23Look around, Cece.
01:24Your curled hair and your frilly dress.
01:27Do you think any of that would be possible without others sacrificing?
01:30You have freedom and peace, because someone else is carrying the burden.
01:35Of course.
01:42The will, Sergeant Trudeau.
01:45And I want to thank you for your service.
01:47Your father's will stipulates that the inheritance is yours, only if signed by both you and your spouse.
02:00Woof!
02:01That means you got 15 minutes to find a husband, Shelby.
02:04Tick tock.
02:04Don't say I'm a bad stepmother.
02:18Give up your inheritance and I'll give you 1%.
02:21Better than nothing.
02:24You stole my father from me most of my life.
02:26You will not take what he left me.
02:29And what this money could do to help the gym and all the women that are part of it.
02:34Really, Shelby.
02:37Who's going to marry you anyhow?
02:38The last guy you even slept with was a one-night stand three years ago at Mardi Gras.
02:56Don't.
02:57Keep the mystery.
03:01You've already lost, Shelby.
03:04Take the 1% I'm offering and be grateful for it.
03:07Right.
03:08You're not even going to find a bum on the street to marry you in time.
03:14Watch me.
03:18Watch me.
03:19Don't worry.
03:34Don't worry.
03:40He looks single.
03:42Oh my god, this is totally food bar.
03:44Suck it up, soldier.
03:47You can't let your evil stepmother and stepsister win.
03:53Hey, mister.
03:55Will you marry me?
03:57I know this sounds crazy and there's no time to explain, but if you help me, I promise a generous reward once I get my inheritance.
04:12Well, this day just got a whole lot more interesting.
04:14So you won't have to live on the streets anymore.
04:17Do I look like a homeless person there?
04:19Priceless.
04:19Shelby Trudeau, are you insane?
04:24You can't marry this palpable.
04:29Shelby Trudeau, the late Judge Trudeau's eldest daughter.
04:33That's right.
04:34The judge said she was a soldier.
04:36He didn't mention she was beautiful, too.
04:39Here's a few bucks.
04:40Take it and get lost.
04:42Don't meddle in our business.
04:44Don't speak to him like that.
04:45He's a person with feelings.
04:49The Cinderella tale, complete with an evil stepmother and obnoxious stepsister.
04:54It's clear who deserves my help, and the timing couldn't be better for me.
04:58All right.
04:59Let's get married.
05:00Names for the marriage certificate?
05:17Shelby Trudeau.
05:20And your name is?
05:23Griffin Roy.
05:24Okay.
05:24Okay.
05:30And congratulations, you lovebirds.
05:56This isn't over.
05:58Tell her.
05:58Sergeant Trudeau, Mrs. Roy, you have to stay married for at least one full year,
06:11or everything goes to your stepmother and stepsister.
06:15You hear that, Shelby?
06:17You won't last a week with that hobo.
06:20Come on.
06:24I guess we'll need to keep in touch, but you probably don't have a permanent address.
06:36Once the estate gets settled, and I have the money, we can get you an apartment and set
06:41you up with a job.
06:42When most people get what they wanted, they usually just walk away.
06:46Well, I'm not most people.
06:49I see that.
06:50I gotta return this.
07:00Goodbye for now.
07:03Goodbye, wife.
07:04Where the hell have you been?
07:18Got you.
07:35Seriously, this is over the top, even for you.
07:40This DNA.
07:41Get it to Detective McSween right away.
07:43Look, as your campaign manager, I need you to be more focused on your image, okay?
07:49You'll never catch LaRoche dumpster diving.
07:55Marrying Isabel was the best decision of my life.
08:00You know, when you elected me to Congress three years ago, you got a package deal.
08:05Griffin Roy, Griffin Roy, just another billionaire bachelor, playboy lawyer, the best.
08:11This, my friend, is where you're vulnerable.
08:14In a snap, I can line up a dozen beautiful, successful women who want me for what I am,
08:20not who I am.
08:21Look, you can't keep pining over some girl you met three years ago.
08:25It's not just some girl.
08:26We had a connection.
08:28Never had that before.
08:30Look, I gotta run.
08:37But, Griffin, you need to find a woman who can stand by your side.
08:41Someone real.
08:42Not this made-up mystery girl you've built up in your head.
08:45Remember that true strength is not physical.
09:05It comes from the belief that you are worth defending.
09:08All right, guys.
09:09That's class.
09:10Nice work.
09:11So, what's the latest on the STD super spreader?
09:20I tried to call him, but Mr. Chlamydia blocked my number.
09:25Who knows how many other women he's done this to?
09:28So, I was thinking maybe it's time to go by his place and confront me in person.
09:34What's holding you back?
09:36Andre's some regular guy, Shelby.
09:38He's got a bro pack.
09:39These men are like wolves with money.
09:42Let's go.
09:43We'll face this douchebag together.
10:04What's your name?
10:05I'm Stephanie.
10:07How about a drink, huh?
10:08Well, that's okay.
10:09Come on.
10:10One little drink won't do no harm.
10:12Okay, one drink.
10:14Really, Pierce?
10:14This clown is the one who controls the town's power brokers.
10:18You want to beat La Roche?
10:20You got to mingle with the good, the bad, and the Andres.
10:26I can't believe I slept with that.
10:31What was I thinking?
10:32I guess I can't hold my liquor.
10:36I mean, the night was just one big black hole.
10:39It wasn't the alcohol that caused you to black out.
10:43That...
10:44Thanks.
10:47That creep.
10:50You dickless loser.
10:51No!
11:02Oh, sorry!
11:07Oh!
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