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Aliyan369
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00:00:00$11.05
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00:00:27What?
00:00:41I'm tired.
00:00:46Okay.
00:00:50I'm sick of all the meaningless connections.
00:00:57Well, maybe, if you didn't fuck a new bitch every night, you'd actually take a moment to connect.
00:01:07Are you slut-shaming me right now?
00:01:11Absolutely not.
00:01:13But I know you.
00:01:15I'm having an existential crisis.
00:01:19Clearly.
00:01:21Why do I always do that?
00:01:24Do what?
00:01:24I don't want to lose myself and others.
00:01:28Like, I'm 22, and I still don't know what I'm doing.
00:01:32I'm going to take a kiss and say it's because you're only 22.
00:01:36Do you not see the difference between me and you?
00:01:39You and Rachel are in a healthy relationship.
00:01:42You're committed.
00:01:43You have a house.
00:01:44Me, I dated a girl who I love so much that I freaked the fuck out, screwed it all up, then wanted her back just to be at the same spot two years again later.
00:01:55I don't get a boutique that I fucking hate waxing vaginas all day.
00:02:07I think that sounds pretty sweet.
00:02:09Parker, you have got to stop comparing us.
00:02:18We are on two separate timelines.
00:02:22We're two different people.
00:02:23I mean, we're at a weird age anyway.
00:02:26I mean, you got some people just going into college.
00:02:30You got some people getting married, have kids.
00:02:33It's gross.
00:02:35I mean, that one guy we knew from AP Bio.
00:02:38I just got a huge deal.
00:02:41I'm thinking about her again.
00:02:44No.
00:02:46I am.
00:02:47You have got to stop this.
00:02:57Every time you get off track, you go back to this, Parker.
00:03:03You are comfortable with her, okay?
00:03:06But you cannot keep going back to that just because.
00:03:10I think I just need to get out of here.
00:03:13Go where?
00:03:15I don't know.
00:03:16Like Nashville.
00:03:18I just want something meaningful.
00:03:25I guess if it keeps you from doing something idiotic.
00:03:29I want to drive.
00:03:32I mean, we can go for a drive and start a drink.
00:03:35I mean, I want to go somewhere.
00:03:37Like a road trip.
00:03:40Why are you looking at me like that?
00:03:42Let's go.
00:03:43Like right now?
00:03:45Like right now.
00:03:48Oh my God.
00:03:51All right.
00:03:53Okay.
00:03:54Yes!
00:03:56Can we go tomorrow?
00:03:58Yeah, that's fine.
00:03:58Hey, Jessica.
00:04:10I don't think that I'm going to be able to make it into work next week.
00:04:12What's that?
00:04:13My grandmother got hospitalized.
00:04:16She, uh, has really bad diarrhea.
00:04:21It won't stop.
00:04:23It won't stop.
00:04:27And they don't know, um, why.
00:04:32Listen, yeah, Jessica, I gotta go.
00:04:34I'm sorry.
00:04:34My mom is waiting on me and I'll be in next week.
00:04:37I promise.
00:04:37You're going to go to hell.
00:04:43My grandma's been dead for like three years.
00:04:47She'll appreciate this one, baby, though.
00:04:50Okay.
00:04:50Okay.
00:04:51Okay.
00:05:21We are the monsters holding you still We are the gallows up on the hill
00:05:46Can you pass me the gummy ones?
00:05:53There you go.
00:05:57You know, when I was a kid and we'd go to the theater with my mom, she'd actually always
00:06:02bring gummies to flip the popcorn.
00:06:04So that's where you got it from.
00:06:05You thought Heather was your ideas?
00:06:08Aww.
00:06:09She sounds like she'd be fun.
00:06:11She wasn't.
00:06:13She's not really.
00:06:17There's no place to hide.
00:06:24I think I caught asthma.
00:06:33I'm tired.
00:06:34We haven't even started walking yet.
00:06:37Oh shit.
00:06:38Can you believe places like this just exist?
00:06:44We get a look at it with like our eyes.
00:06:49It makes me feel kinda small.
00:06:53But in a good way.
00:06:54In a good way.
00:06:55I guess that's better than you know like going the other way around.
00:07:00That's how you mean.
00:07:02It don't matter?
00:07:04Alright.
00:07:05We're gonna stick a pen in that and come back to that later.
00:07:09Enjoy the view.
00:07:10Yeah.
00:07:11I'm glad we did this.
00:07:14It's a good idea.
00:07:19I'm starting to think that I needed this too.
00:07:32You know?
00:07:35I don't know.
00:07:36I just feel like every day is starting to blend together.
00:07:40And it's just become so monotonous.
00:07:43And like am I doing something big in the grand scheme of everything?
00:07:48How could you say that?
00:07:50You and Rachel are literally perfect.
00:07:53That's interesting that you think that just cause I'm in a relationship with Rachel
00:07:59that my life is squeaky clean and spotless.
00:08:02I just never really thought about it.
00:08:06I mean don't get me wrong.
00:08:08Rachel's my bitch.
00:08:09I love her.
00:08:10But she doesn't define my whole existence.
00:08:14Even on our best days, I still feel like my existence is infinitesimal.
00:08:25Whoa!
00:08:26Big word.
00:08:27I know.
00:08:28It's a song.
00:08:29It's a dope ass song.
00:08:30You should listen to it.
00:08:49So like we're supposed to see like UFOs?
00:08:53Yeah.
00:08:54So apparently when it gets dark, this becomes like the darkest place in the country.
00:09:02And then the UFOs come out.
00:09:04So like at night time?
00:09:05Yeah.
00:09:06At night time.
00:09:07Interesting.
00:09:08Yeah.
00:09:09So you remember that one time me, you and Rachel went to Canada and then we all got lost
00:09:19in Toronto.
00:09:20Yeah.
00:09:21You would think that someone from Toronto would know their way around Toronto.
00:09:26Yeah.
00:09:27Well, but do you remember how when we were on the plane and like all of our phones died
00:09:33and so we just gave up and then we went and got sushi.
00:09:36Dude, best sashimi ever.
00:09:39Oh no.
00:09:41I guess I just miss doing stuff like that.
00:09:44Well, I kind of feel like that's what we're doing.
00:09:46You know, sitting out in the woods looking for aliens.
00:09:51Yeah.
00:09:53You do be having a point.
00:09:56Yeah, that's what we're doing.
00:09:59So what's next?
00:10:02You know, I really haven't thought that far.
00:10:05Yeah.
00:10:06Well, I'm just following your lead.
00:10:10I'm probably going to need to go back to work sometime though.
00:10:13Oh, I definitely am getting fired.
00:10:15Yeah.
00:10:16Fuck capitalism.
00:10:17I don't want to work for modern societies anyways.
00:10:18I want to live in the woods and scavenge for berries.
00:10:23Alright.
00:10:24Well, why don't we go to Nashville?
00:10:30Really?
00:10:31Yeah.
00:10:32You brought it up.
00:10:33I mean, if we left right now, we could probably get there by the night.
00:10:38Bed.
00:10:39But wait.
00:10:48There is one more thing I want you to see.
00:10:51Follow me.
00:10:52Follow me.
00:10:53What are you doing, nerd?
00:10:54Just journaling a little.
00:10:55Journaling?
00:10:56Mm-hmm.
00:10:57How was work?
00:10:58Oh, good.
00:10:59You know, it's just work.
00:11:00Oh, my dad called me on my break.
00:11:02Yeah.
00:11:03Yeah.
00:11:04He wants to see if we want to go get dinner with him sometime this week.
00:11:06I have no plans.
00:11:07No plans?
00:11:08Good.
00:11:09Good.
00:11:10Good.
00:11:11Good.
00:11:12Good.
00:11:13Good.
00:11:14Good.
00:11:15Good.
00:11:16Good.
00:11:17Good.
00:11:18Good.
00:11:19Good.
00:11:20Good.
00:11:21Good.
00:11:22Good.
00:11:23Good.
00:11:24Good.
00:11:25Good.
00:11:26Good.
00:11:27Good.
00:11:28Good.
00:11:29Good.
00:11:30I think it'll be good.
00:11:32We literally haven't seen him since.
00:11:34Could you help us with enough...
00:11:54Coffee?
00:11:55so the aliens come to earth for this
00:12:21and you just put your stuff on the ground and the aliens will see it yeah so i mean you just you
00:12:36just bring your weird some of the shit um and then uh like uh the aliens beam down and like
00:12:47appreciate it a lot i don't know that's what the lady at the desk said so it's called an alien junkyard
00:12:57yeah
00:13:01okay well what are you gonna put down
00:13:06way ahead of you
00:13:17you too that's where you're leaving yeah you don't think you should like leave some like a picture of
00:13:25you and rachel no the aliens don't want to see a couple of normies they want to see
00:13:31aubrey plaza in a questionable christmas film
00:13:35okay
00:13:39what are you gonna leave i don't know
00:13:41what about that oh hell no i've had this thing for like eight years
00:13:49okay and that's what makes it perfect it's got your human juice memories all over it
00:14:06all right well the aliens better appreciate the out of that that thing's been the staple of my wardrobe
00:14:11since like high school hey we're here to leave our old selves behind we're here to find who the new
00:14:20us is the new parker okay well will you let me know when you figure that out probably not
00:14:26what you look so pretty can you help
00:14:38i'm nervous why i feel like your dad hates me now what he's always liked you he's like
00:14:57the only family you have and i just want to know how much i love you can you trust i can make good
00:15:15all right today's the day so do we have anything else on the agenda other than nashville
00:15:30no just wherever we end up what is it without nashville anyway oh my parents always said that
00:15:37we would take a family trip there and we just never went so and it kind of stuck with me why
00:15:42we always went on a cruise or to disney world i don't know i guess it was just never really
00:15:49important to them to go to nashville but it was to you yeah i always thought of it kind of like a
00:15:54magical place you know but in a cool rustic cowboy way plus i always wanted to get one of those cute
00:16:00little guitar keychains my parents just always shit me off to my grandparents and they lived in a really
00:16:07tiny town so i mean it was an adventure in its own you know just with a lot of cornfields and
00:16:13no fast food restaurants see but i wish i had that you wish you never went on a cruise no not like
00:16:21that i mean like i wish my parents cared more about what i wanted
00:16:25how can i put this place you my friend need a reality check what do you mean so why did you
00:16:40wake up with ellie again like in high school yeah i didn't know what i wanted but now all of a sudden
00:16:49you know what you want i mean so let me get this straight you broke up with her because you didn't
00:16:59want to be with her but then you did want to be with her then two years later when she got upset
00:17:04because you didn't treat her the way you said you were going to treat her now all of a sudden you want
00:17:08back you know it's not so cut and dry i'm just playing devil's advocate i was 17. i thought i needed
00:17:17to drink all the time and smoke weed and just create this like tornado of emotion just to feel something
00:17:23you know there it is the contradiction the contradiction you love to sabotage yourself
00:17:30you have to have the main character energy and you have to have all the problems that's not true
00:17:35you know that's kind of true she's important to me fern i know she is if there's ever a chance in hell
00:17:44that you're going to get her back you've got to have better coping mechanisms you got to learn
00:17:49you got to grow they're not going to be good for her unless you're good for you no
00:17:55you want another drink i think i'm okay
00:18:25you think you liked me hard you've never not liked peter
00:18:36i wouldn't like me
00:18:43why do you do that do what why do you need other people's validation he's your dad ellie
00:18:55but i love you can that not be enough
00:19:03i can't you forgive yourself
00:19:10because i always
00:19:16okay good job
00:19:25i
00:19:30i
00:19:33i
00:19:35i
00:19:37i
00:19:39i
00:19:41i
00:19:43i
00:19:45i
00:20:17I'm going to puke.
00:20:47Are you ready for it?
00:20:51Why do I feel like I'm about to have a pulmonary embolism?
00:20:54You know, that is how I felt the first time I ever saw Brad Velvet's music video for Psycho.
00:21:17When blue waters flow.
00:21:21Yes, this is a place I would go.
00:21:26We might get ourselves lost.
00:21:30We may never be found.
00:21:33If ever that day comes around.
00:21:36Dude, that sucked.
00:21:49I wasn't going to say anything unless you did.
00:21:51I don't know why I thought a city full of drunken tourists, vomit-filled streets, and cheapo guitar souvenirs would be so life-altering.
00:22:04It's almost like you build things up in your head to be bigger than they actually are.
00:22:09You have all these unrealistic expectations.
00:22:11I don't need a lecture.
00:22:18I just think life is about the little things.
00:22:22The stuff you didn't plan.
00:22:24Yeah.
00:22:25No, you're right.
00:22:25I like these fries.
00:22:31I'm going to remember these fries for the rest of my life.
00:22:39I have an idea.
00:22:42Okay.
00:22:44Follow me.
00:22:55Break into the pool.
00:23:05What?
00:23:07For the bucket list.
00:23:08I'm going to break into the pool at night.
00:23:13Okay.
00:23:23Cool.
00:23:25We should get started now.
00:23:28You know it still hurts a little bit, but not that much.
00:23:33Because if you want somebody else, who am I to judge?
00:23:38I've been thinking about you all the time, but that's all right.
00:23:43I'm starting to get used to it.
00:23:45I think I'll survive.
00:23:47I met you in the summer.
00:23:50When you left, it was cold.
00:23:52Said we loved one another.
00:23:54Guess that we were wrong.
00:23:57I met you in the summer.
00:24:00My love was out of control.
00:24:02I've been going crazy without you so long.
00:24:06I met you in the summer.
00:24:07I met you in the summer.
00:24:17I met you in the summer.
00:24:19I met you in the summer.
00:24:35I met you in the summer.
00:24:35So what to do?
00:24:38I'm just staring at my walls and talking to myself now and then I'll try to laugh, but I'll cry a bit as well
00:24:43I was never any good at being away from you
00:24:47I met you in the summer
00:24:49When you left, it was cold
00:24:52Said we loved one another
00:24:54Guess that we were wrong
00:24:57I met you in the summer
00:24:59Our love was out of control
00:25:01I've been going crazy without you for so long
00:25:07I met you in the
00:25:17I met you in the
00:25:27I met you in the summer
00:25:31You know it still hurts a little bit, but not that much
00:25:43Cause if you want somebody else, who am I to judge?
00:25:47I met you in the summer
00:25:48With your dream
00:25:50I met you in the summer
00:25:52I met I met you in the summer
00:25:53I met you in the summer
00:25:54Time to shut it down, time to shut it down.
00:26:12Shut it down, shut it down!
00:26:24I'm not sure what you're doing.
00:26:34I'm not sure what you're doing.
00:26:40I'm not sure what you're doing.
00:26:46I love it when you play.
00:27:08I know.
00:27:12So where'd you learn how to play English?
00:27:15My dad, actually.
00:27:17Yeah, he taught me.
00:27:19But he only learned to impress my mom.
00:27:21Really?
00:27:23Funny.
00:27:25There's a lot you don't know about me.
00:27:27Oh, yeah?
00:27:28Yeah.
00:27:29Tell me one thing I don't know about you.
00:27:31Oh, God.
00:27:35Okay, when I was a kid, and I would catch fireflies, I would make wishes on them.
00:27:43That's probably the cutest thing I've ever heard.
00:27:47Um, I mean that was one good thing about my mom.
00:27:51I feel like she always had her head in the clouds and believed that life was, like, made of magic.
00:28:01It's actually really instilled that in me.
00:28:03Yeah, but that does kind of sound like you.
00:28:07Ugh.
00:28:08I mean, yeah.
00:28:09I kind of hate it, though, because she was always wanting to live this, like, bigger-than-life reality.
00:28:15And one day she just decided that me and my dad were not part of that dream anymore.
00:28:22It wasn't enough, so, yeah.
00:28:25I mean, you were just a kid.
00:28:29I don't think it had anything to do with you not being enough.
00:28:35Yeah.
00:28:36Plus, your heart is nothing like hers, anyways.
00:28:39I just don't want to hurt someone the way she handled it.
00:28:46I don't want to hurt someone.
00:28:49Plus, I feel like a five-year-old wanting to play pretend all the time is probably a lot to handle.
00:28:56Plus, you know what?
00:29:11I don't think she even wanted kids, anyway.
00:29:13Anyway.
00:29:14Any way.
00:29:16. . .
00:29:23. .
00:29:26. .
00:29:28. .
00:29:30. .
00:29:37. .
00:29:42Where are we going?
00:29:55You'll see.
00:29:58Are you going to kill me?
00:30:01Allie, you're not supposed to know. Be quiet.
00:30:04Are you choosing a way by knife or another weapon?
00:30:07What would be more Villanelle of me?
00:30:10She'd probably have some really elaborate scheme and then corner me in an alleyway and parents or something.
00:30:17Mine would be better.
00:30:31This is sweet.
00:30:33You're sweet.
00:30:40Oh, so my friend Mikayla is coming in from out of town next weekend and there's this party that I think we're going to do.
00:31:03I thought we went out last weekend.
00:31:08I know, but I want to go like out, out.
00:31:12Just going out with me, just like knock out?
00:31:16You know I don't mean it like that.
00:31:19Yeah, I guess I'll just stay home alone again.
00:31:22I have found the best use of our word for the most uncomfortable situation.
00:31:50It's gone.
00:31:53What happened?
00:31:55Well, I'm glad you asked.
00:31:57There I am in the woods, trying to take a fat piss and a fly goes right in my face.
00:32:04That's not the best part.
00:32:06Because I didn't see it.
00:32:07I fell right back into my piss.
00:32:10It's not funny.
00:32:13It's kind of funny.
00:32:14Kind of not funny.
00:32:14It's kind of very funny.
00:32:17Get in the car.
00:32:18Get in the car.
00:32:19We're going.
00:32:19We're going.
00:32:19All right.
00:32:45What?
00:32:46What?
00:32:46I got you something.
00:32:52What is that for?
00:32:57Just because?
00:33:13Ellie, I'm sorry.
00:33:14You're doing it.
00:33:17Doing what?
00:33:19You're pulling away.
00:33:21Ellie.
00:33:23No.
00:33:24It's not like that.
00:33:25No.
00:33:26You promised me on New Year's that you wouldn't do this because of some confusion you have about
00:33:31yourself and what you want.
00:33:34Ellie, we just went on a picnic and to dinner with your dad.
00:33:41What?
00:33:43Am I not allowed to have a few drinks after work?
00:33:46Leave the house?
00:33:47Am I not allowed to?
00:33:50No, you can leave the house.
00:33:53But when you came back to me, we promised that our relationship would not be like this
00:33:58anymore.
00:34:00That's not what's happening.
00:34:01And then what is happening?
00:34:03I don't know.
00:34:08You never do.
00:34:11But I don't, I don't know.
00:34:13I don't want to know what living in a world without you is like.
00:34:17And I feel like I'm hurting you.
00:34:19And stop pulling away.
00:34:23It hurts me when you do that.
00:34:25We're happy with you.
00:34:27We're good.
00:34:28Yeah, we're good.
00:34:30We're good.
00:34:30We're good.
00:34:49We're good.
00:35:05We're good.
00:35:07Can I get a cap?
00:35:24For the sixth time?
00:35:26No.
00:35:28Because they stink.
00:35:30They're stinky.
00:35:32You want to clean the litter box?
00:35:33Hold on. Oh my god. Hold on. I'm so late.
00:35:39Oh, that's probably Rachel.
00:35:45It's my mom.
00:35:52You sure this is a good idea?
00:35:54Don't be a fucking pussy.
00:35:55I'm not a fucking pussy.
00:35:58I'm gonna get caught.
00:36:03I'm not a fucking pussy.
00:36:11I'm not a fucking pussy.
00:36:12I'm not a fucking pussy.
00:36:14I'm not a pussy.
00:36:16I'm not a pussy.
00:36:17I'm not a pussy.
00:36:19I'm not a pussy.
00:36:21I'm not a pussy.
00:36:23So far, are you again?
00:36:25Hold up.
00:36:26We gotta go over here.
00:36:29Let's go.
00:36:32Come on.
00:36:32What are we going to do now?
00:36:37We're already in our bathing suits.
00:36:39Want to go to the beach?
00:36:41What beach?
00:36:43Pinsicola?
00:36:46Yeah.
00:36:47I guess.
00:36:48Yeah.
00:36:49Okay.
00:36:50Okay.
00:36:51Okay.
00:36:52Okay.
00:37:02Okay.
00:37:06Without my love for the ocean, I wouldn't be long gone by now.
00:37:19It's some kind of devotion that brings me down.
00:37:30That without my love for the ocean
00:37:35I will be no one
00:37:40No one
00:37:43La, la, la, la, la, la, la
00:38:13I got there and he was gone
00:38:18I'm so sorry
00:38:23My mom was there and she was acting like it was the end of her world
00:38:28Like she never left
00:38:30Like she even cared, ever
00:38:36I know, it's so complex
00:38:41She didn't deserve to see him at all
00:38:45I deserve to see him
00:38:47Oh
00:38:48Don't owe me
00:38:50She's your mom
00:38:52I don't care
00:38:55Oh
00:38:58What can I do?
00:39:00Nothing
00:39:02Oh
00:39:06He's my dad
00:39:08He was the only one that was ever there for me
00:39:10He was the only one who never left
00:39:13I don't know what the fuck I'm supposed to even do now
00:39:17I'm so sorry
00:39:20Don't be
00:39:22Okay, but like
00:39:24I'm here
00:39:26Whatever you need
00:39:28Are you?
00:39:38What does that even mean?
00:39:40I'm sorry, Parker
00:39:41I just...
00:39:42I just don't know how to process it
00:39:43I don't know how to process it
00:39:47I get it
00:39:48Nobody should be projecting that onto you, I shouldn't be doing that, I'm sorry
00:39:53I kinda deserve it
00:39:56No you don't
00:39:57Ellie
00:39:58Ellie
00:39:59Let's be honest
00:40:01I'm not the most
00:40:03reliable
00:40:05person
00:40:07that's in your life
00:40:08I feel like
00:40:11I wreak havoc
00:40:13on you
00:40:15your life
00:40:16your stability
00:40:18I feel like
00:40:21I leave you constantly
00:40:23wondering
00:40:24when the next time
00:40:25I'm gonna have a
00:40:26big breakdown
00:40:27and
00:40:28what's happening?
00:40:31This isn't about me
00:40:36This is about you
00:40:38You just lost your dad
00:40:47I just can't believe he's gone
00:40:56You were so good last time this time
00:41:01We'll be back soon
00:41:26I don't know, but I just don't miss her
00:41:29Yeah, I feel that
00:41:34Who do you miss?
00:41:37Your mom
00:41:39Yeah, I bet you do miss my mom
00:41:42No, really I do
00:41:45You know, reiterate, let's just go back
00:41:47Why are we here again?
00:41:50Like, on the trip?
00:41:52Yeah, yeah, on this trip
00:41:54Because
00:41:57We wanted to
00:42:00do something exciting
00:42:02Get away
00:42:04Something to distract ourselves
00:42:06from this mundane capitalist
00:42:09environment
00:42:10environment
00:42:20And
00:42:21And
00:42:22And
00:42:23I'm trying to get over Ellie
00:42:24Ding, ding, ding, ding
00:42:25We have a winner
00:42:26One moment
00:42:27One moment
00:42:32Blind as a bat
00:42:33Alright
00:42:34So I'm gonna role play
00:42:35as your therapist
00:42:36Gigi
00:42:38Not to be confused with Gigi
00:42:39from the L word
00:42:40Betting Gigi forever
00:42:42So, first question
00:42:44Why do you think
00:42:46it is so hard for you
00:42:48to let go?
00:42:49What keeps you holding on?
00:42:53She's the love of my life
00:42:57And why do you think that?
00:42:59Because I always go back to her
00:43:02I mean
00:43:03Time and time again
00:43:09Do you not think
00:43:11that maybe
00:43:13you're just comfortable
00:43:14in the environment you created with her?
00:43:15Like
00:43:16Do you really think
00:43:18that like
00:43:19out of 7 billion people
00:43:20in this whole world
00:43:21there's not
00:43:22one other person
00:43:23that you might love?
00:43:26Not like Ellie
00:43:31A rollercoaster of emotion
00:43:33is not love
00:43:36It was love
00:43:40The purest love
00:43:41I think I've ever experienced
00:43:42Well
00:43:46Sometimes love
00:43:47isn't a nothing
00:43:49Not to be healthy at least
00:43:51Why can't I just make it
00:43:52fucking work?
00:43:54Like, I feel like Taylor Swift
00:43:56I miss screaming, fighting
00:43:58kissing in the rain
00:44:00I don't wanna be boring
00:44:01and comfortable
00:44:03I understand
00:44:05that it must be really hard
00:44:08to even think
00:44:10and fathom
00:44:11that there might just
00:44:13be a life
00:44:14after Ellie
00:44:16but
00:44:17life is bendable
00:44:18it's changeable
00:44:19like
00:44:20you
00:44:21we are meant to heal
00:44:23you could finally love someone
00:44:26the way that you deserve to
00:44:32I just wanted it to be her
00:44:35I know it's her
00:44:37she's my person
00:44:38I hope you're right
00:44:39I hope you're right
00:44:41I hope you're right
00:44:47okay so, um, Missy just called me
00:44:49and I need to get to the theater home
00:44:52because she doesn't fucking know how to do anything
00:44:55so I have to get ready when I get there
00:44:58so can you just, like, you just need me there?
00:45:00yeah, go on
00:45:01I love it
00:45:02I love it
00:45:03I love it
00:45:04I love it
00:45:05I love it
00:45:06I love it
00:45:07I love it
00:45:08when Ellie drinks all my oat milk
00:45:09out
00:45:27Wow. I love it when Ellie drinks all my oat milk.
00:45:57They turn our homes into ashes. We fled out the back door. We ran towards the city of love.
00:46:17Hello? Ellie? Yeah, what's wrong?
00:46:21My fucking tire popped. I had to pull off the side of the freeway into some random parking lot.
00:46:27What do you mean? I mean it's completely deflated.
00:46:33You had to go get milk? Yeah, I just needed the distraction.
00:46:38Have you caught a tow truck? I can call one, but odds are it'll probably take a few hours.
00:46:45The funeral's in an hour, Parker. I know. I could try calling Fern see if he can-
00:46:48I have to go. Just get here.
00:46:50Son of a bitch.
00:46:55I'm sorry.
00:46:56I went to the store and milk for the coffee, and then I was going to go straight to the funeral home.
00:47:00But then my tower popped, and I called the tow truck company, but they said that they couldn't be there until 1.30, and I didn't know what else to do.
00:47:08I didn't do it on purpose.
00:47:23You missed my dad's funeral.
00:47:29I know, and I'm so sorry, but it's not my fault.
00:47:34Why didn't you think to just stay home?
00:47:40Alright.
00:47:42Do you ever think about what's going on around you?
00:47:47Ellie.
00:47:48This isn't your fucking world, Parker.
00:47:51Do you ever think, hey, maybe I should just stay home, because Ellie's dad just died.
00:47:56My tire would have popped on the way to the funeral anyways.
00:47:59That's very convenient.
00:48:01Oh, do not pin this on me. I wanted to be there for you.
00:48:05Then you're a lot of talk.
00:48:07What the fuck is your problem?
00:48:09My problem?
00:48:11Parker, you need to figure out if I am good enough for you.
00:48:15If you ever care to give me a scrap of attention.
00:48:18All I do is give you my attention.
00:48:22All you do is worry about Parker.
00:48:30Oh, fuck that, Ellie. Would your mom do this?
00:48:33What is that?
00:48:45It's a stupid scrapbook that I made for our one year anniversary after getting back together.
00:48:51But it doesn't even fucking matter anymore now, does it?
00:48:53Because I'm so unpredictable, just like your mom.
00:48:56No. No, actually, you're really predictable.
00:49:02We always end because you always live.
00:49:10Ellie.
00:49:13Ellie!
00:49:19Ellie, don't go!
00:49:20I have to.
00:49:21I'm going to go to my dad's beach house in Pennsylvania.
00:49:26You can't leave me like this.
00:49:29You always left me like this, Parker.
00:49:32You're the love of my life.
00:49:37This isn't about us anymore.
00:49:40I need to find me.
00:49:41I need to find who Ellie is again.
00:49:43It's not you, it's me, right?
00:49:45It's you too!
00:49:47You desperately need to grow and find who you want to be and who Parker is.
00:49:53I don't think there can be an us anymore.
00:49:56I don't want to be here without you.
00:50:00I can't ruin myself for you anymore.
00:50:04And you can't either.
00:50:12I don't want you to go.
00:50:14I know.
00:50:15I know.
00:50:36Fern!
00:50:40Fern!
00:50:41Ruby.
00:50:43Yeah, you can be there by seven.
00:50:44I mean, you know it's going to be late anyways.
00:50:46I mean, that's how it usually goes.
00:50:49Yeah.
00:50:53Parker just woke up.
00:50:54Hey, I'll, see you when I see you.
00:50:57Okay.
00:50:59Love you.
00:51:00Bye.
00:51:01Hey!
00:51:02What are you doing?
00:51:06Rachel's going to pick me up from the airport.
00:51:07the airport. What? Why? Something wrong? Nothing. I'm just not stupid. I'm confused.
00:51:20Why are we in Pensacola? Because we wanted to go to the beach.
00:51:27Why are we in Pensacola, Parker?
00:51:30Look, Fern, I was going to tell you. Yeah, I know where Ellie lives. I really tried to
00:51:41give you the benefit of the doubt, but you are just the same old Parker.
00:51:49Those, those weren't my intentions. So you didn't mean to take me on a trip
00:51:56that I thought was us bonding and having all these crazy, awesome life experiences together
00:52:03only so that you can just weasel your way in to go see Ellie. That's not what happened.
00:52:13Well, I'm glad I could be upon in your game. So cool. I mean, I wanted to see Ellie,
00:52:21but it became something more along the way. Halfway through, I even forgot why I started the trip.
00:52:33Parker, you are my best friend, but for the love of God, you are so manipulative. Anything you want,
00:52:42you get. Come on, don't ruin the trip.
00:52:46You already ruined it. I'm sorry. I needed to see her. I needed to win her back.
00:52:58You are so worried about making sure everybody loves you that you end up treating the people who
00:53:06actually do love you like shit. I'm just confused, Fern. I can't do anything right.
00:53:14No one said you had to have it all figured out, but you just dragged everyone into your shit.
00:53:22You know what? You can call me when you've decided to be the Parker that I know you are.
00:53:30I won't be waiting for the call though.
00:53:41I don't see him.
00:53:43It's looks good.
00:53:45I don't see him.
00:53:46He's trying to have it all.
00:53:48I can't do anything to know.
00:53:57I can't do anything.
00:53:59You don't need it.
00:54:01You don't need it.
00:54:03You don't need it.
00:54:04Maybe it's a little more important.
00:54:07I can't do anything for you.
00:54:08Hi, Mark.
00:54:23Hi.
00:54:31So, how are you?
00:54:33What are you doing in Pensacola?
00:54:35Oh, I'm good.
00:54:37Um, I was just passing through the area.
00:54:40I figured I'd shoot you a message.
00:54:42I remember that you said that, um, you were going to your dad's beach house in Pensacola.
00:54:46So, I thought it was worth a shot.
00:54:49Oh, yeah.
00:54:50I mean, moving here is probably one of the best decisions I've made in a while.
00:54:54I can imagine.
00:54:56Probably much better than home.
00:54:59I was home.
00:55:00Uh, humid.
00:55:01Kind of boring.
00:55:02The usual.
00:55:04I miss it a little.
00:55:07Yeah, well, you know, if you're ever in town, you can, you can stay with me.
00:55:13Thanks, Mark.
00:55:14Yeah.
00:55:16It's probably not a good idea, but I appreciate the offer.
00:55:20Yeah, I mean, I just, I figured I'd at least offer.
00:55:24How's Fern?
00:55:25She's good.
00:55:27Um, yeah, she's good.
00:55:29Rachel?
00:55:30She's good, too.
00:55:31Uh, they actually just got engaged and then bought a house, but I'm sure you already knew
00:55:35about all that.
00:55:36I do still talk to Rachel sometimes.
00:55:39That's good.
00:55:40You guys ever talk about me?
00:55:41Uh, no, definitely not.
00:55:44Oh.
00:55:45Well, I mean, that's good.
00:55:48Our ending shouldn't mean, you know, an ending for you guys, too.
00:55:51It doesn't.
00:55:52So, there's this music shop I saw, um, over off of the pier.
00:56:00Figured if you don't have any plans later, maybe we could swing by.
00:56:05Um, I, I'm getting dinner with my friends tonight, actually.
00:56:10Well, I mean, that's okay.
00:56:12It was last minute anyways, but where are you guys going?
00:56:15Just this little Italian restaurant downtown.
00:56:18We, we go, like, every Friday, so.
00:56:21Yeah.
00:56:29Why am I here?
00:56:30Sorry.
00:56:33I just, I needed to see you.
00:56:36It's, it's been years.
00:56:40What do you need to see me for?
00:56:42Just still don't understand why things ended, you know?
00:56:45Like, you're my person, and I can't, I just can't stop thinking about the night you left.
00:56:53I'm not your person, Park.
00:56:56Not anymore, at least.
00:56:59But, you said it yourself.
00:57:01We're soulmates.
00:57:03You said soulmates have to be forever, Park.
00:57:05Because then what's the point?
00:57:07The point is that we taught each other lessons and how to love and treat someone with dignity and live up to your words, you know?
00:57:17I just, I know you're the person that I'm going to end up with.
00:57:27Maybe in another universe, we were together forever, but I just don't think we're living in that universe anymore.
00:57:35Why is it so hard for me to get over you, but for you, it's so easy?
00:57:44It wasn't easy.
00:57:46I spent months mourning you and I and the person I was when I was with you.
00:57:52And trying to figure out how I was going to live life without you in it.
00:57:57And I lost my best friend.
00:58:00And, you know, part of me hoped that we would cross paths again and just fall into each other's arms and everything would be like it used to, but that's just not life.
00:58:11Who said?
00:58:13Parker.
00:58:14Why can't we just have, like, a fairytale ending where we always end up together?
00:58:20Because this isn't a movie, you know?
00:58:23We're real people, this is real life, and I just don't think we can exist together without hurting each other over and over and over again.
00:58:34God, I must sound insane.
00:58:36No, I just don't think you take it well when things don't go your way.
00:58:47I love you.
00:58:52I think I should go.
00:58:54I'm sorry.
00:58:57No, it's fine.
00:58:58I just, you know, I wish you the best.
00:59:01I'll stay.
00:59:02I'll stay.
00:59:06I'm sorry.
00:59:14Please, don't leave.
00:59:16Parker, it's time to move on.
00:59:19You have a whole life ahead of you that does not involve you.
00:59:23A life that's beautiful and flawless.
00:59:27You and I were a mess of memories, and I cherish all of them.
00:59:32But you will always be one of my favorite lives, okay?
00:59:47I'm sorry.
00:59:48It doesn't change anything.
00:59:49I'm sorry.
00:59:49It doesn't change anything.
01:00:02It doesn't change anything.
01:00:03It doesn't change anything.
01:00:29This is for you.
01:00:59This is for you.
01:01:29This is for you.
01:01:59This is for you.
01:02:29This is for you.
01:02:59This is for you.
01:03:29This is for you.
01:03:59This is for you.
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