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Short filmTranscript
00:00:00What?
00:00:01Yeah, and I can't marry someone who picks up dog crap for a living.
00:00:04Well, at least I don't pose in my tighty-whities for money.
00:00:07Here, place your mind.
00:00:09I'm not staying in a doghouse.
00:00:11Ahem.
00:00:12Can you guys just keep it down?
00:00:14I have work tomorrow morning.
00:00:16Sorry.
00:00:17Hey, Amelia.
00:00:20Looks like someone needs obedience school.
00:00:23Are you gonna let him talk to me like that, Amelia?
00:00:25You started.
00:00:26Asshole!
00:00:27Crazy bitch!
00:00:28You told her?
00:00:29She's my sister.
00:00:30I don't care.
00:00:31That violates our agreement.
00:00:32How?
00:00:33What the fuck?
00:00:36What?
00:00:37Michelangelo?
00:00:38Don't worry.
00:00:40You're such a hypocrite.
00:00:41I wish I never agreed to this awful engagement.
00:00:43I fucking hate you.
00:00:45I fucking hate you more.
00:00:53How was it?
00:00:55Well?
00:00:56That was the best sex I've ever had in my life.
00:01:00Wait.
00:01:01What are you doing?
00:01:02That is an original.
00:01:03I'm so sick of your bullshit.
00:01:06Oh, fine.
00:01:07I'll just hop in my time machine, go back to ancient Rome, and get another one.
00:01:10I don't care about your art, your money, your stupid mansion.
00:01:13You're treating me like shit.
00:01:16That's from the Renaissance.
00:01:17You are history's worst nightmare.
00:01:19I tried to make this work with you.
00:01:20We signed a contract.
00:01:21For an arranged marriage.
00:01:22Did you actually think this arrangement would be anything more than a business transaction?
00:01:27You are such a simpleton.
00:01:28Oh.
00:01:31Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
00:01:32Well, at least I'm not a spoiled brat.
00:01:35I tried to get along with you.
00:01:36You brought this onto yourself.
00:01:37I wish I never agreed to this awful engagement.
00:01:39Right back at you.
00:01:41I fucking hate you.
00:01:43I hate you.
00:01:44I fucking hate you more.
00:02:06So, you were arrested.
00:02:09Again.
00:02:10To be fair, we thought I was legal.
00:02:14We'll just swim there.
00:02:16There is a fence around that reservoir.
00:02:19It says here that you broke in using bolt cutters.
00:02:24If I had known you invited me over here to lecture me, I wouldn't a game.
00:02:31Come on, Gucci. Come on.
00:02:33Good boy.
00:02:35Oh.
00:02:40Okay.
00:02:41Come on, Gucci. Let's go.
00:02:42Hey.
00:02:43Amelia.
00:02:45Hey, James.
00:02:51Come on, Gucci. Let's go.
00:02:52You know, every time the paparazzi catch you acting crazy, it reflects on me.
00:03:02It reflects on the company that your mother and I built with our bare hands.
00:03:07The same one that pays for your ridiculous lifestyle.
00:03:09I make my own money.
00:03:10I make my own money.
00:03:12Oh, you see, you see.
00:03:14Underwear modeling, Lord.
00:03:16I am the spokesperson for man thumb.
00:03:18That means free underwear for life.
00:03:20For life.
00:03:22Some parents would be proud.
00:03:23Yeah.
00:03:24Other parents would be prouder if you went to your real job now and then.
00:03:26You are next up to be CEO at Dino Verlino Cosmetics.
00:03:32Now, how can I give you that job if you keep acting like a Kardashian, huh?
00:03:37Hmm.
00:03:39All right. Don't forget the meeting this afternoon, all right?
00:03:41And don't be late.
00:03:44Bye, Dad.
00:03:45Excuse me.
00:04:02Ew.
00:04:04Hello, my Gucci.
00:04:06Why won't Michelangelo just grow up, huh?
00:04:09He needs to settle down and find himself a nice girl, huh?
00:04:14Thank you, Amelia.
00:04:17Good one, Romulus.
00:04:34These are great.
00:04:37I still don't have what I'm looking for.
00:04:39Do you guys mind staying a little longer?
00:04:41No problem.
00:04:42Cool.
00:04:43Let's take five and then I want to see you in that leopard print.
00:04:50Hi.
00:04:52I'm Michelangelo.
00:04:54Chantal.
00:04:55Nice to meet you.
00:04:57I couldn't notice how hot you are.
00:05:00I've got tickets to the premiere...
00:05:04Hold that thought.
00:05:07Hey, Dad.
00:05:08Where the hell were ya?
00:05:11Dad, I'm in a photo shoot.
00:05:13You're supposed to be at the office.
00:05:15Geppetto came here all the way from Milano.
00:05:18I can meet him later.
00:05:19Now the suit lady's back on the plane again.
00:05:22Well, you're the one who planned the meeting during my shoot.
00:05:24Michelangelo, you are 31 years old.
00:05:27You gotta stop acting like an idiot teenager.
00:05:29You could be running the world's largest cosmetic company right now.
00:05:33You interned. You went to business school.
00:05:36You have potential, okay?
00:05:38But you say you want to be the CEO?
00:05:39Well, you're gonna have to prove it.
00:05:41Cause so far...
00:05:43I ain't seen the ante from you.
00:05:46Bye, Dad.
00:05:50Hey.
00:05:52You okay?
00:05:54Yeah.
00:05:56But...
00:05:57I'd be a lot better if you'd go out with me tonight.
00:05:59So, it's a really rare form of cancer.
00:06:17Luckily, my doctors did catch it early.
00:06:21Oh my god.
00:06:23There is an experimental treatment, but it's really expensive.
00:06:27And my insurance doesn't cover it.
00:06:30Don't worry about that.
00:06:32I have money saved.
00:06:34I'll find the rest.
00:06:35We will figure this out, okay?
00:06:37We're gonna get through this together.
00:06:54Ciao Gucci!
00:06:55Did she have a good walk?
00:07:01What's wrong?
00:07:07I'm sorry.
00:07:08This...
00:07:09No, no, forget about it.
00:07:10I'm sorry about your sister.
00:07:12The treatments are just really expensive.
00:07:15I have a savings for my doggy daycare.
00:07:18My dream, but...
00:07:22It's only enough for one treatment.
00:07:24And who knows how many she's gonna need.
00:07:27Betsy practically raised us.
00:07:29After our parents passed, I would do anything for her.
00:07:33Amelia, I think I might know how to get you that money.
00:07:40You do?
00:07:42Come back tonight.
00:07:44And, uh, make something nice.
00:07:47Oh, Amelia, you look bellissima.
00:08:03Except for the dog hair.
00:08:05Well, come with me.
00:08:08I have someone I want you to meet.
00:08:11Are they from Italy?
00:08:12Yes.
00:08:13Wow.
00:08:14Yes, of course, everything's from Italy here.
00:08:17Well...
00:08:19Amelia, meet.
00:08:20Dr. Angelo for my son.
00:08:22I believe you both bumped into each other yesterday.
00:08:24Mm-hmm.
00:08:25Yeah.
00:08:26Aren't you the cleaning lady?
00:08:28I'm a dog walker.
00:08:30Don't be so defensive.
00:08:32I wasn't.
00:08:37Well, I suppose I'll let you two get acquainted.
00:08:40I have some unfinished business to do.
00:08:42Why don't you give yourself a glass of vino?
00:08:45Amelia.
00:08:47Arrivederci, huh?
00:08:55Do you want to do me a favor?
00:09:02What exactly?
00:09:11How does it look?
00:09:12Not half bad.
00:09:14I mean, it's fine.
00:09:16Whatever.
00:09:20Let's do some sexy ones, okay?
00:09:22Or not.
00:09:23I don't feel like being your photographer all night.
00:09:26You work for my dad.
00:09:27You have to do what I say.
00:09:28You don't look like Romulus to me.
00:09:31Just a few more pictures.
00:09:33I'm not here to update your Tinder profile.
00:09:35I don't need Tinder.
00:09:36I'm an underwear model.
00:09:38My DMs are flooded like Florida in a hurricane.
00:09:41Whatever.
00:09:47Pour me another.
00:09:49I told you, I'm...
00:09:53Fine.
00:09:59See?
00:10:00Dog walker.
00:10:01That wasn't so hard.
00:10:05What the fuck?
00:10:07This is fucking Prada!
00:10:13Asshole!
00:10:14You crazy bitch!
00:10:15Amelia!
00:10:20What's wrong?
00:10:22I asked her to pour me another drink.
00:10:24And she flipped out.
00:10:26I'm sorry, Romulus.
00:10:27But your son is a prick.
00:10:28I'm gonna be leaving.
00:10:29No, no, no, please.
00:10:30I apologize.
00:10:31My son, he's just immature.
00:10:33Alright?
00:10:34And that's why I invited you.
00:10:36Put forward it.
00:10:38Please.
00:10:39Just have a seat.
00:10:40Alright?
00:10:41I promise.
00:10:42He'll be on his best behavior for the rest of the night.
00:10:43Won't you, son?
00:10:45So, Amelia needs money to pay for her sister's cancer treatment.
00:10:50Cancer?
00:10:53And you need to settle down and prove that you're worthy of running the family business.
00:10:57Make my own money, Dad.
00:11:00Okay.
00:11:01I want the business.
00:11:03I think we can, uh, make a deal whereby everyone gets what they want.
00:11:10What kind of deal?
00:11:12Well, it's nothing crazy.
00:11:15No.
00:11:17You two just have to get married, that's all.
00:11:19What?
00:11:22What?
00:11:23Romulus, what are you saying?
00:11:24I can't marry the male Paris Hilton.
00:11:26Yeah, and I can't marry someone who picks up dog crap for a living.
00:11:30Well, at least I don't pose in my tighty-whities for money.
00:11:33Oh, Angelo, look.
00:11:35You have to grow up before you can run our business.
00:11:38And the best way to do that is to get married.
00:11:41We're not even a match.
00:11:42We hate each other.
00:11:43At least I do.
00:11:44Obviously.
00:11:46I see.
00:11:47There's something in common already.
00:11:49Look, you know, my wife and I, we were opposites.
00:11:52Oh, yeah, we were like pizza and Hawaiian pizza.
00:11:57She sure drove me crazy when we first met.
00:12:01I know you're probably thinking I'm just some old fool, huh?
00:12:04But I learned a thing or two in 70 years.
00:12:07You two have chemistry.
00:12:09Yeah, like a nuclear bomb.
00:12:11As if.
00:12:13Romulus, isn't there another way?
00:12:15I don't want to be miserable for the rest of my life.
00:12:18Amelia, you do want to help your sister, don't you?
00:12:21Or you'll be able to afford the treatment if you just agree to this arrangement.
00:12:25What's it gonna be?
00:12:30What's it gonna be?
00:12:34What's it gonna be?
00:12:38Fine.
00:12:39I'll do it.
00:12:41For Betsy.
00:12:46Angelo, it's not polite to keep a lovely lady waiting.
00:12:49If you're not gonna agree to marry her, then you're gonna lose the business.
00:12:55And you're also gonna lose your inheritance.
00:12:59What the hell, Dad?
00:13:03Fuck it, fine.
00:13:04I'll do it.
00:13:06Now, let's just go into the office now.
00:13:09The lorries have already drafted the contract.
00:13:12Son, we're gonna need some champagne.
00:13:15Right in my mind.
00:13:16Try and make yourself look decent now.
00:13:21You will be engaged for a period of 30 days.
00:13:24Followed by a wedding planned by me.
00:13:27And I'll tell you, it's gonna be a big one for the ages, too.
00:13:30I hope the Hollywood Bowl's not booked.
00:13:33Anyway.
00:13:35You must move in together immediately to avoid any suspicion, you know.
00:13:39Look, there's nothing wrong with an unarranged marriage.
00:13:42But, well, it can't do any good if word got out to the public, right?
00:13:46That's why this has to be our own secret.
00:13:49Are we agreed?
00:13:51Sure.
00:13:53All right.
00:13:54Sign in.
00:13:55All right.
00:14:13Salute.
00:14:15To the new couple.
00:14:16So, your place or mine?
00:14:27I'm not staying at a doghouse.
00:14:29Fine.
00:14:31Then we'll stay at yours.
00:14:32So, this is Michelangelo's place.
00:14:45It's like a museum in here.
00:14:47A Michelangelo museum.
00:14:49Ugh.
00:15:03Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
00:15:05What was this?
00:15:06Put it in the trash.
00:15:08This isn't trash.
00:15:09These are my sisters.
00:15:10She's an artist.
00:15:12So, put them in your room.
00:15:13I said you could live here, not decorate.
00:15:15Oh, I'm sorry.
00:15:16Is it clashing with your banana hammock?
00:15:18That's man-thong.
00:15:20It's trademarked.
00:15:21Look, I gotta go meet somebody.
00:15:26If this isn't cleaned up by the time I get back, we'll throw it all in the fireplace.
00:15:30It's electric.
00:15:36Oh, by the way.
00:15:39This is gonna work.
00:15:41You might wanna start wearing that.
00:15:44Gee, thanks.
00:15:45Welcome.
00:15:52You're getting married?!
00:15:55Shh, Betsy.
00:15:56Don't tell the whole world.
00:15:58I'm sorry, Amelia.
00:15:59It's just...
00:16:01It's not like you.
00:16:03You're saying you're...
00:16:04Reserved.
00:16:06Safe.
00:16:08Like I always taught you.
00:16:11Well, things change when you find out your sister has cancer.
00:16:15And besides, Michelangelo offered to help pay for some of your treatments.
00:16:19So...
00:16:20I'm okay with a quick proposal.
00:16:22Michelangelo...
00:16:24The Ninja Turtle?
00:16:26No.
00:16:27Michelangelo...
00:16:29Dino Valeno?
00:16:30Maybe you've...
00:16:31Heard of him?
00:16:32Michelangelo Dino Valeno?!
00:16:34Shhh!
00:16:38Socialite Animal?
00:16:40Like, start a hundred cancel Bravo shows?
00:16:43How did you even meet?
00:16:44His dad is one of my clients.
00:16:46It's...
00:16:49Been a whirlwind of a romance.
00:16:52He's so...
00:16:53Toxic.
00:16:55Speak of the devil?
00:16:58Oh, yeah.
00:17:00You know, that's probably an old issue.
00:17:03This is a doctor's office.
00:17:06Amelia.
00:17:09Betsy Carlisle?
00:17:11Doctor's ready.
00:17:13We'll talk about this later.
00:17:14We'll talk about this later.
00:17:15the guy!
00:17:16Are you ready to get wet, baby?
00:17:38We're already wet.
00:17:40Where did that come from?
00:18:10Nice place. I love the artwork.
00:18:26Thanks, Marley. Ooh, good taste.
00:18:32Oh, I'm good. We had plenty at dinner.
00:18:36More for me.
00:18:40You know, if you like it down here, you should see the bedroom.
00:18:56Who are you? Who are you?
00:19:00Chantel, this is Amelia, my roommate.
00:19:04Whatever. Can you guys just keep it down?
00:19:08I have work tomorrow morning.
00:19:10This is my house?
00:19:12We will be as loud as we want to be.
00:19:14Scream at the top of our lungs!
00:19:16You've got to be kidding me.
00:19:18What's wrong, Dog Walker?
00:19:20Who's jealous?
00:19:22Jealous? I'm not jealous.
00:19:24Sweet dreams.
00:19:26I can't believe he said I was jealous.
00:19:28How could I ever want to be with a party boy like him?
00:19:30Even if he is kinda hot.
00:19:32I can't believe he said I was jealous.
00:19:34How could I ever want to be with a party boy like him?
00:19:36Even if he is kinda hot.
00:19:38See you later.
00:19:48And, um, don't worry about last night.
00:19:54Sorry. I had one so many to drink. It won't happen again.
00:19:58Better not.
00:20:00How's the hangover, roomie?
00:20:02Not now. My head's killing me.
00:20:04We need to talk about last night.
00:20:06No, what we need to do is talk about last night.
00:20:08We need to talk about last night.
00:20:10We need to talk about last night.
00:20:12What we need to do is order a three egg omelet and home fries.
00:20:24I don't care if you're fooling around with your bimbos. Monogamy wasn't in the contract.
00:20:28But, your dad doesn't want people knowing that this is an arranged no matter.
00:20:32You don't care if you're fooling around with your bimbos. Monogamy wasn't in the contract.
00:20:36But, your dad doesn't want people knowing that this is an arranged no matter.
00:20:40Your dad doesn't want people knowing that this is an arranged marriage.
00:20:42And, you made it pretty clear to that girl last night that you don't care about me.
00:20:46Fine. I'll have her sign an NDA. Just give me my phone.
00:20:48My sister needs this money, Michelangelo.
00:20:52And, if the paparazzi find out about this, then the contract is violated.
00:20:56Then, neither of us get what we want.
00:20:58Yeah, no shit.
00:20:59I'm serious. Don't screw this up.
00:21:03I've been dealing with paparazzi since I was a teenager.
00:21:06I know what I'm doing. Dog walker.
00:21:09And, just so we're clear. I will fuck whoever I want.
00:21:12Whatever I want.
00:21:13Wherever I want.
00:21:15Fine. Do whatever you want.
00:21:18Sorry. It's a bit harsh. I'm just really hungover.
00:21:27That could have gone better.
00:21:29I know. I know. I like it.
00:21:30Oh, that's good to hear.
00:21:32You know, I just hope that your work ethic rubs off on my son.
00:21:35Tell me, uh, how are things going between the two of you, huh?
00:21:38Oh, fine. Yeah, we're still getting to know each other.
00:21:41All right. Well, give him time, all right?
00:21:44Oh, and listen. He is not as bad as TMZ says, all right?
00:21:47Look, I promise.
00:21:48I wouldn't be so sure.
00:21:49Yeah, you're right.
00:21:50Well, we'll see you later.
00:21:51Yeah. Come on, Gucci. Come on.
00:21:52Bye, Gucci.
00:21:53Hey, Amelia.
00:21:55Hey, Jake.
00:21:56Gucci, no!
00:21:57Oh, Royce.
00:22:00Oh, I don't know.
00:22:18How are you doing?
00:22:20Gucci, no!
00:22:21Royce!
00:22:22I'd say bad dog, but I'm not actually mad about this.
00:22:27Just to see you up close for once.
00:22:29Yeah, same here.
00:22:38Sorry, Gucci's a bit crazy.
00:22:42His whole family, actually.
00:22:44All these rich people are nuts.
00:22:46They should make a reality show.
00:22:48We're all dog owners of Beverly Hills.
00:22:52Do you want to walk together?
00:22:54Let these two get to know each other?
00:22:56Yeah.
00:22:58I'd like that.
00:23:04So, how long have you been a dog walker?
00:23:07A couple months.
00:23:08I like it.
00:23:09I had a bunch of terrible gigs before.
00:23:12Barista.
00:23:13Uber driver.
00:23:15Delivery guy.
00:23:16Movie extra?
00:23:18You were in a movie.
00:23:19Actually, it was a toothpaste commercial.
00:23:21He was trying to impress you.
00:23:22How about you?
00:23:24How long have you been doing this?
00:23:26I don't know.
00:23:27My whole life, I guess.
00:23:29It started as a summer job, and then I turned it into my own business.
00:23:33I want to open a doggy daycare someday.
00:23:35Wow.
00:23:36I guess you really like dogs.
00:23:38Well, they're easier to hang out with than humans sometimes.
00:23:41If you want to hang out with this human sometime.
00:23:46My band's playing at the Echoplex tonight.
00:23:49If you want to go.
00:23:51And I have to admit, I had a crush on you.
00:23:55You did?
00:23:57Yeah.
00:23:58I still do.
00:24:01I still do.
00:24:04He's cute.
00:24:05I wish he'd asked me out before I got legally engaged.
00:24:09Then again, that fuckboy has been out having fun.
00:24:15I'd love to go to the concert.
00:24:18Hell yeah.
00:24:20I mean, uh, regular, yeah.
00:24:22I know it's risky, but I'm not a socialite like Michelangelo.
00:24:28I won't have to worry about paparazzi spotting me at the show.
00:24:33Hey, what's your ring?
00:24:36Um, it's just a class ring from high school.
00:24:41Looks pretty big.
00:24:43It was a big school.
00:24:45Public schools, am I right?
00:24:52I mean, it kind of looks like an engagement ring.
00:24:55Me?
00:24:56Engaged?
00:24:57No.
00:24:58Are you kidding?
00:24:59I'm 24.
00:25:00I'm practically still a baby.
00:25:01I mean, I should be wearing diapers, crawling around, drooling.
00:25:05Nope.
00:25:06Single and ready to mingle.
00:25:08Okay.
00:25:12Royce pooped.
00:25:14Should pick it up.
00:25:15Where? I don't see it.
00:25:17Just over there.
00:25:20Come on.
00:25:23Do I have to wear a suit every day?
00:25:27Of course.
00:25:28It's an office.
00:25:29You wanna be CEO, you gotta look the part.
00:25:31You mean like, you look like Willy Wonka without the chocolate factory?
00:25:36Very funny.
00:25:37You know I'm retiring next year.
00:25:38Yes, I know.
00:25:39Yeah.
00:25:40That means you gotta get up to speed, rapidamente.
00:25:43So today you're gonna be my shadow, you be my extra hands, and we got a lot to do.
00:25:47Can I get Starbucks first?
00:25:48Fuck no.
00:25:49Come on, Dad.
00:25:52Okay.
00:25:59Help!
00:26:03Oh my goodness.
00:26:04Are you okay?
00:26:06Hi, I'm Michelangelo.
00:26:07You're engaged, remember?
00:26:08And this is our new palette.
00:26:17It's Matt's collection.
00:26:20He really liked these colors, so we did them twice.
00:26:22But yeah, that's the presentation for me, Michelangelo.
00:26:35What, Dad?
00:26:40What a day, Dad.
00:26:41It's not even lunchtime yet.
00:26:43Look at you, you got so lazy just sitting around taking pictures of yourself all the time.
00:26:48Just stick with it, will you, kid?
00:26:50Hard work does pay off.
00:26:52Just look at Amelia.
00:26:53What about her?
00:26:54She comes from nothing, son.
00:26:56Nobody taught her how to run a business.
00:26:58But she just worked hard, and now...
00:27:01Well, now she earns money doing what she loves.
00:27:03I guess that's impressive.
00:27:05Yeah, see.
00:27:06See, it is.
00:27:07I hope she rubs off on you a little, you know?
00:27:10I just hope I don't get that uptight.
00:27:12Break's over.
00:27:35Well, not too bad, huh?
00:27:37One day down.
00:27:39Forty more years to go.
00:27:43Now this is the time when you go home with Amelia,
00:27:47you talk about the day's work,
00:27:49raise you closer together,
00:27:51comfort each other, just like your mom and I used to do.
00:27:56You know, I'm thinking,
00:27:58it's time for the world to meet Amelia...
00:28:02tonight.
00:28:04Tonight?
00:28:06Shit.
00:28:07When am I gonna tell Chantel?
00:28:08I promised we'd Netflix and bang tonight.
00:28:10L.A. Zoo fundraiser.
00:28:11Lights, camera, red carpet.
00:28:13Perfect time to announce our lovely new addition
00:28:16to the Dino, Virginia, Amelia.
00:28:20Don't you think it's a bit soon, Dad?
00:28:21I mean, we just signed the contract.
00:28:24What's the matter?
00:28:26You're getting along all right, aren't you?
00:28:28Yeah, yeah.
00:28:29Just really starting to warm up to each other.
00:28:31All right, so it's all settled.
00:28:33I'll see you at eight o'clock tonight in the limo and...
00:28:37don't be late.
00:28:41Bye, Dad.
00:28:42Yeah.
00:28:43Mm-hmm.
00:28:52So, remind me, why are we getting makeovers done again?
00:28:58Because I want to do something nice for my favorite big sister.
00:29:02And?
00:29:04And...
00:29:06You know I never splurge on stuff like this.
00:29:08But, since I'm part of the Dino Levino family now,
00:29:11I think I can afford to let my hair down.
00:29:14You better not let that hair down.
00:29:16Sorry, just an expression.
00:29:17How's it going in there?
00:29:26I'm coming out!
00:29:36Is that bad?
00:29:39I've never seen a dog walker look this hot.
00:29:44Buy that dress.
00:29:45ASAP.
00:29:48Leave me alone, party boy.
00:29:52I've got my own function tonight.
00:30:17What are you looking at?
00:30:29You're spilling all over yourself.
00:30:31Oh, thanks.
00:30:33Um...
00:30:35Did you forget my name?
00:30:36No, it's just, uh, something different. Did you change your hair?
00:30:43Why do you care? The manwhorehouse is yours tonight. I'm going out. I just forgot my charger.
00:30:48Awesome, thanks.
00:30:52I'm taking this.
00:30:54Wait, I've been calling you. We're supposed to go to a fundraiser.
00:30:56I told you, I'm busy.
00:30:58Hold on!
00:31:02Amelia!
00:31:10All right, hey, look who's right on time. Nice.
00:31:13Where's Amelia?
00:31:14She's sick. She can't make it.
00:31:17Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
00:31:18If your fiancé's sick, you know, you can't go out and party.
00:31:24Yeah, you gotta stay home with her.
00:31:27Give her some nice soup.
00:31:29I'll catch both of you for the next one.
00:31:30Tell Amelia that I hope she feels better sooner.
00:31:33Poor thing.
00:31:35Okay, Dad.
00:31:37See you in the office.
00:31:43Stupid dog walker?
00:31:45Tricking me with her makeover.
00:31:46I'll teach her to mess with my plans.
00:31:56Hey.
00:31:57It's Michael and Lodino and Lovino.
00:31:58Do you still track people?
00:32:15Wow.
00:32:17Amelia.
00:32:19Hi.
00:32:21You look like you just walked off a runway.
00:32:23Without a dog.
00:32:25Sorry, I don't come to concerts often.
00:32:27I kind of panicked.
00:32:28No worries.
00:32:29I should have mentioned this is more of a $5 beer kind of place.
00:32:32Yeah.
00:32:33But you're drinking for free tonight.
00:32:35Talk to the bartender.
00:32:37Wow.
00:32:38VIP treatment.
00:32:39You look like one.
00:32:41Thanks, Jack.
00:32:43Hey.
00:32:44Lover boy.
00:32:45We're on.
00:32:47Gotta go.
00:32:49Find me in the green room after.
00:32:51Hope you like it.
00:32:52Break a leg.
00:32:53Lovely boy.
00:32:54Break a leg.
00:32:55Lovely boy.
00:33:13Rock stars are so much better than underwear models.
00:33:15All I do is you know what I want, babe.
00:33:16You know what I want, babe.
00:33:17You know what I want, babe.
00:33:18Good.
00:33:19Nothing from Michelangelo.
00:33:20Maybe he's learned his lesson.
00:33:21One more, please.
00:33:24But that doesn't mean I'm not hooking up with Jake tonight.
00:33:25Jake, you guys are great.
00:33:26You really think so?
00:33:27I just feel like we're ripping off the strokes.
00:33:28The who?
00:33:29No.
00:33:30No.
00:33:31No.
00:33:32No.
00:33:33No.
00:33:34No.
00:33:35No.
00:33:36No.
00:33:37No.
00:33:38No.
00:33:39No.
00:33:40No.
00:33:41No.
00:33:42No.
00:33:43No.
00:33:44No.
00:33:45No.
00:33:46No.
00:33:47No.
00:33:48No.
00:33:49No.
00:33:50No.
00:33:51No.
00:33:52No.
00:33:53No.
00:33:54No.
00:33:55No.
00:33:56No.
00:33:57No.
00:33:58No.
00:33:59No.
00:34:00I don't remember the strokes.
00:34:02The who?
00:34:03You don't know the strokes.
00:34:04Are they older?
00:34:04I'm more of a top 40 kind of girl.
00:34:09It's alright.
00:34:10Lots of stuff to you to energize you.
00:34:11You want something to drink?
00:34:13Yeah.
00:34:17So when did you learn how to play guitar?
00:34:18Since I was 13.
00:34:20Since I was 13, played in bands all through high school and college, but I feel like this one's finally going someplace.
00:34:28That's awesome.
00:34:29When I get my record deal, I can finally quit my job, focus on music full time.
00:34:34You're gonna quit dog walking? I thought you liked it.
00:34:39I do, but it's just another gig until I hit it big in music. I don't even like dogs that much. I'm more of a cat person.
00:34:46A cat person?
00:34:50Who doesn't like dogs? Even Michelangelo's good with Gucci.
00:34:55I don't want to talk about work tonight. I just want to relax. Have a good time.
00:35:01You're beautiful, you know that?
00:35:05I thought I wanted to hook up with Jake. Now I'm not sure. We have nothing in common. Is it weird that I feel a tiny bit guilty?
00:35:13What the heck? I'm tipsy, and he's cute. Michelangelo had his fun. Now I can have mine.
00:35:22Looks like someone needs obedience.
00:35:38What's going on?
00:35:40That's Michelangelo, Dina Lavino, the Nepo Baby underwear model.
00:35:45He's not. You coming with me, dog walker? Don't make me get the leash.
00:35:49What the hell, Michelangelo?
00:35:51Back off, dude. Back off.
00:35:54Grubby little hipster. She's my fiancée.
00:35:57So that was an engagement ring?
00:35:59Jake, I can explain.
00:36:01Let's go.
00:36:02I'm really sorry, Jake.
00:36:05I'm not, Jake.
00:36:11This is for making me Uber all the way to fucking sober, Mike.
00:36:17And this is for making me listen to Andy.
00:36:25I can't believe you did that after your high and mighty speech. You're such a hypocrite.
00:36:28Yeah, well, I don't have the paparazzi following me around. Just an Italian-American psycho.
00:36:34I'm not following you around.
00:36:36You know what? I get it.
00:36:38You saw me with Chantel last night, and now you're jealous.
00:36:42Me jealous? Did you see the way that you were acting around Jake?
00:36:46Like, I would ever fuck a dog walker.
00:36:48I am more than a dog walker, you playboy prick. I have a name.
00:36:53Wait, what are you doing? That is an original.
00:36:55I'm so sick of your bullshit.
00:36:56Oh, fine. I'll just hop in my time machine, go back to ancient Rome, and get another one.
00:37:02I don't care about your art, your money, your stupid mansion. You're treating me like shit.
00:37:08That's from the Renaissance. You are history's worst nightmare.
00:37:11I tried to make this work with you. We signed a contract.
00:37:13For an arranged marriage.
00:37:15Did you actually think this arrangement would be anything more than a business transaction?
00:37:19You are such a simpleton.
00:37:20Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
00:37:25Well, at least I'm not a spoiled brat.
00:37:27I tried to get along with you. You brought this on to yourself.
00:37:30I wish I never agreed to this awful engagement.
00:37:32Right back at you.
00:37:34I fucking hate you.
00:37:35I fucking hate you more.
00:37:37I don't care.
00:37:40I don't know.
00:37:54I can't pay attention.
00:37:59I wish I killed it.
00:38:00What if he wants to, he wants to, he wants to,
00:38:06he wants to work.
00:38:09Oh, look, he wants to, he wants to work.
00:38:13Um-hmm.
00:38:19Yes it is!
00:38:26where am i who's spooning me
00:38:44is that jake how drunk was i
00:38:49michelangelo
00:38:54dog walker
00:38:56oh i forgot we did that last night
00:39:00must have been all those free beers
00:39:03we don't have to talk about this
00:39:08we had too many drinks
00:39:09just forget it ever happened
00:39:11if that's what you want
00:39:13definitely
00:39:14um i have to go to work
00:39:19i should get up too
00:39:22oh my head
00:39:24there's pedialite in the fridge
00:39:26thanks for coming today sis
00:39:29of course
00:39:30my doctor did say i needed lots of exercise
00:39:35well you look great thanks
00:39:39i don't feel great
00:39:41the treatment's taking a lot out of me
00:39:44but you on the other hand
00:39:47you on the other hand are glowing today
00:39:48what's going on
00:39:51so michelangelo and i had sex last night
00:39:56wait for the first time
00:39:59yeah we're taking it slow
00:40:02michelangelo the male gigolo is taking it slow
00:40:07maybe i did miss dredgen
00:40:11and how was it
00:40:15well
00:40:16really bad
00:40:18right
00:40:19i knew it
00:40:20actually
00:40:21it was the best sex i ever had
00:40:23well that explains the glow
00:40:27i am happy for you sis
00:40:31physical chemistry is important
00:40:34that's actually what i wanted to talk to you about
00:40:36i don't get it
00:40:38he and i are nothing alike
00:40:40and yet he knows how to push all of my buttons
00:40:42i feel like
00:40:42like an arcade game
00:40:44and he just keeps getting the high score
00:40:45again and again and
00:40:46you get the picture
00:40:48hey
00:40:51opposite to track
00:40:54i mean
00:40:55that's why you guys love each other so much
00:40:58because you're so different
00:41:00something like that
00:41:02here comes
00:41:11right on the schedule
00:41:12dog walkers in love with me
00:41:14i'll have to let her down easy
00:41:17weird
00:41:18i haven't heard from the dog walker all morning
00:41:20what was that about
00:41:32must be the hangover
00:41:33hey i'd like to hang out tonight
00:41:44maybe we can finish what we started last time
00:41:46hey
00:41:58unfortunately
00:41:59something came up
00:42:00i
00:42:01i can't make it tonight
00:42:03why can't i stop thinking about the dog walker
00:42:08and why hasn't she
00:42:09texted me yet
00:42:11we should talk
00:42:15Hey.
00:42:18Hi.
00:42:21We should talk a little bit about Leslie.
00:42:38I'm not very good with words.
00:42:43Me neither.
00:42:44Last night I...
00:42:45You don't have to say anything.
00:42:47We both know it was a mistake.
00:42:49And we can just go back to hating each other.
00:42:51Like nothing ever happened.
00:42:53I don't think you understand if you would just listen to me for a second.
00:42:56Look, you don't have to worry about me catching feelings.
00:42:58I'm a big girl.
00:42:59I've had a one night stand before.
00:43:01I've never been with someone like you before.
00:43:04Okay, I get it.
00:43:06I'm not one of your models or your D-list actresses.
00:43:10You don't have to give me some big speech about letting me down easily.
00:43:14I know that if you would take back last night, that you would.
00:43:17I mean...
00:43:18Frankly, so would I.
00:43:19I mean, you're driving me nuts.
00:43:20You don't understand.
00:43:21Let's get some takeout and figure this thing out.
00:43:24I don't need you to mansplain my own feelings to me.
00:43:28Wait.
00:43:29Did you just call me Amelia?
00:43:34What happened to Dog Walker?
00:43:36I have a confession to make.
00:43:42Last night...
00:43:43I don't know how.
00:43:44I don't know why.
00:43:46That was the best sex I've ever had in my life.
00:43:49Really?
00:43:52Do I look like I'm lying?
00:43:54I'm not a good actor.
00:43:56I could even do reality TV.
00:43:59But...
00:44:00There is...
00:44:01A fire between us, Amelia.
00:44:03Some kind of crazy...
00:44:05Cosmic chemistry.
00:44:08You sound like you're...
00:44:09Reading a horoscope.
00:44:10Amelia...
00:44:12Please.
00:44:14I know you felt it too.
00:44:20Amelia...
00:44:22Please.
00:44:23Don't act like you didn't feel it too.
00:44:26I felt it too.
00:44:32So why are we fighting it?
00:44:34I've been thinking about you all day.
00:44:37Me too.
00:44:49So...
00:44:50I set the kitchen on fire?
00:45:02How am I supposed to know you're not supposed to light fireball shots on fire?
00:45:07It's not my fault.
00:45:08They should change the name.
00:45:09No wonder they cancelled Vanderpump's super yacht.
00:45:10If you think that's funny, just wait till the next episode.
00:45:11The captain gets super drunk off espresso martinis and he almost sinks the boat.
00:45:12You know...
00:45:13When you're not acting like a complete douchebag?
00:45:15You're not so bad.
00:45:16You're not so bad.
00:45:17You're not so bad.
00:45:18You're not so bad.
00:45:19You're not so bad.
00:45:20You're not so bad.
00:45:21You're not so bad.
00:45:22How am I supposed to know you're not supposed to light fireball shots on fire?
00:45:24It's not my fault.
00:45:25They should change the name.
00:45:27No wonder they cancelled Vanderpump's super yacht.
00:45:28If you think that's funny, just wait till the next episode.
00:45:30The captain gets super drunk off espresso martinis and he almost sinks the boat.
00:45:34You know, when you're not acting like a complete douchebag?
00:45:41You're not so bad.
00:45:44Thanks?
00:45:46You know, we could actually try this.
00:45:50Hey, if the sex stays this good, I'm open for anything.
00:45:54I'm serious.
00:45:56The wedding's coming up.
00:45:58We could give it a shot.
00:46:00You mean like, you and me.
00:46:02Together together.
00:46:04Why not?
00:46:05Were you planning on marrying someone else?
00:46:11Oh, Gucci! What's the rush?
00:46:29Oh, hey, Royce. Jake.
00:46:32How's it going?
00:46:33Good... yeah.
00:46:35Yeah.
00:46:37Look, the other night was kind of...
00:46:38Crazy. I know.
00:46:41I should have told you about Michelangelo.
00:46:43We were kind of in a fight.
00:46:46I'm sorry for bringing you into this.
00:46:48Is he always like that?
00:46:50So aggressive and controlling?
00:46:52I couldn't believe the way he just dragged you off like that.
00:46:55He was like a caveman lugging home his woman.
00:46:58Well, I am his woman.
00:47:00He saw us together and he got jealous.
00:47:03And I don't blame him.
00:47:04Oh, my God.
00:47:06Am I actually sticking up for Michelangelo Dinovolino?
00:47:10I didn't mean to pry.
00:47:12Just wanted to make sure everything's okay.
00:47:15I'm here if you need to talk.
00:47:17Thanks, Jake.
00:47:18But I'm engaged.
00:47:20Remember?
00:47:22And the only person I want to talk to is my fiancé.
00:47:25I thought we had a connection.
00:47:27You're a cat person.
00:47:29It never would have worked.
00:47:31Come on, Gucci. Let's go.
00:47:34Cats are awesome.
00:47:37That was a great presentation.
00:47:44The marketing director loved your ideas for the new line.
00:47:47You think so?
00:47:48Ooh.
00:47:49Maybe I'm finally starting to get a hang of this CEO thing.
00:47:52Oh, yeah, yeah.
00:47:53Now, listen.
00:47:54I got to fly to Paris for a few days.
00:47:56You mind watching your little brother for me?
00:47:59Gucci?
00:47:59Sure.
00:47:59But, I mean, you know, dogs are more Amelia's specialty.
00:48:03Yeah, but that's how you impress her.
00:48:05You invite her for a romantic date at the dog park.
00:48:09At the dog park?
00:48:10Mm-hmm.
00:48:11I just texted her.
00:48:12It's all set.
00:48:13Now, go get her, lover boy.
00:48:16So, you just throw it and he brings it back?
00:48:30You've never played fetch before?
00:48:33It's my dad's dog, not mine.
00:48:37Let me try.
00:48:39That's okay.
00:48:40I know you don't want to touch a slobbery ball with your dainty hands.
00:48:46Do you ever get tired of the dog stuff?
00:48:50No.
00:48:51I like my work.
00:48:53What's the point of working if you never get a chance to have fun?
00:48:58You're right.
00:48:58I should work less.
00:49:01If nothing else, you're letting me get closer to my little brother.
00:49:08Fetch, Gucci.
00:49:13I've got a big surprise.
00:49:16A surprise?
00:49:18Just wait and see.
00:49:27Grazie, Enzo.
00:49:28Have a good night, Mr. De Novelino.
00:49:35What's that?
00:49:36A special delivery from Mastrione's Italian Deli?
00:49:42But, Gucci?
00:49:44What's your favorite prosciutto?
00:49:47You know, that's awful for dogs, right?
00:49:50I thought you were off the clock today.
00:49:54Besides, a special occasion.
00:49:55I also thought we could use his water bowl to pour a little Chianti into it.
00:50:02I'm kidding.
00:50:04This is for us.
00:50:05Why don't you get us a corkscrew?
00:50:07What else is in the bag?
00:50:08Just some imported Italian ingredients, so I can make you a real Italian dinner.
00:50:12You can cook?
00:50:14You can cook?
00:50:24That was so good.
00:50:30I feel like I just went to Italy, even though I've never been.
00:50:34How did you do this?
00:50:36I can't cook at all.
00:50:38Making Italian food is one of my favorite things to do.
00:50:40Did you learn in culinary school?
00:50:42No.
00:50:43My mom taught me.
00:50:44Tell me about her.
00:50:46I never told a girl about my mom.
00:50:50Sorry.
00:50:51I don't mean to pray.
00:50:53She passed away when I was 11.
00:50:56Breast cancer.
00:50:57But I have a lot of good memories of her.
00:51:01She grew up in a little village in Tuscany, and she taught me everything I know about cooking.
00:51:07We'd spend hours in the kitchen just cooking and eating and laughing.
00:51:11I still have all of her recipes here, handwritten in Italian.
00:51:19That's really special.
00:51:22I miss her.
00:51:25This might sound corny, but I feel a little closer to her when I make her recipes.
00:51:30It's not corny.
00:51:33But I didn't know you were such a softie.
00:51:35Just don't tell TMZ.
00:51:38What about your parents?
00:51:40My parents died in a car accident when I was 13.
00:51:45It's been me and Betsy ever since.
00:51:47I'm sorry.
00:51:49I just really hope these treatments work.
00:51:53I don't want to lose her, too.
00:51:57I'm sorry.
00:51:58Your story made me emotional.
00:52:00I'm going to go do the dishes.
00:52:02I'll help you.
00:52:02No, no, it's fine.
00:52:03I like doing the dishes.
00:52:05It relaxes me.
00:52:07Good.
00:52:08Because I hate them.
00:52:09Well, then I guess we make a good team.
00:52:15Is it just the wine?
00:52:17Or am I really falling for...
00:52:19him?
00:52:20Her.
00:52:20Her.
00:52:33Hey.
00:52:35Hey.
00:52:36Do you want an espresso?
00:52:38I just figured out how to make the machine work.
00:52:40No, thank you.
00:52:41Me and Dad have a morning meeting.
00:52:42I'm kind of in a rush.
00:52:43Okay.
00:52:43Well, don't forget Gucci.
00:52:45How could I?
00:52:46Yeah.
00:52:48Ready, bro?
00:52:49Well, let me fix your tie.
00:52:53What do you know about ties?
00:52:54You wear t-shirts to work.
00:52:56And you wore man thongs two weeks ago.
00:53:00Touche.
00:53:01There you go.
00:53:03Okay, bye.
00:53:04Bye.
00:53:07Love you.
00:53:08Love you, too.
00:53:09Love you, too.
00:53:18Sorry.
00:53:20Reflex.
00:53:20I didn't mean to say that.
00:53:22Me neither.
00:53:23Too soon.
00:53:25Talk about it later?
00:53:27Yeah.
00:53:28Okay.
00:53:29Okay.
00:53:30Ugh, could that have been any more awkward?
00:53:33And is Michelangelo really in love with me?
00:53:39Look who's here.
00:53:42Hey, my little guy.
00:53:45Hey, little Gucci.
00:53:47Look at this right here.
00:53:50Let's try it.
00:53:52Oh, yeah.
00:53:53Now, here's mine.
00:53:56Just like that.
00:53:58Even got one for big brother.
00:54:00Right there.
00:54:02Come to Papa.
00:54:03Yes, my boy.
00:54:06All right, all right.
00:54:07So, we got to talk about this wedding, right?
00:54:10This is two weeks off.
00:54:12Hollywood Bowl.
00:54:13They're waiting for an answer.
00:54:14And I bumped into Chris Martin on the plane.
00:54:17He says the band is free.
00:54:20You like Coldplay, right?
00:54:21Dad, we can't have the wedding at the Hollywood Bowl.
00:54:25Coldplay.
00:54:26Well, all right.
00:54:27Then we'll book the Magic Castle.
00:54:29How about that?
00:54:30Not too big.
00:54:30Plenty of room for Coldplay, huh?
00:54:33Dad, let's just pump the brakes.
00:54:35We cannot plan a wedding like this.
00:54:36What?
00:54:37Something wrong with Amelia?
00:54:39No.
00:54:41Everything is great.
00:54:42It's better than great, honestly.
00:54:45But we cannot have a big, flashy wedding.
00:54:48That's our thing.
00:54:50It's not Amelia's thing.
00:54:52I think it'd make her uncomfortable.
00:54:55Wow.
00:54:56I never thought of that.
00:54:58You know, you have a very good point there.
00:55:00I'm very impressed.
00:55:04You've never acted like this with any other woman.
00:55:08I can't say I've ever felt like this with another girl.
00:55:12Sounds like you might be falling in love.
00:55:15Love?
00:55:17Yeah.
00:55:17I don't know.
00:55:19I don't know.
00:55:20He's cute.
00:55:22All right, all right.
00:55:24Change of deal.
00:55:25Then I cancel the Hollywood Bowl.
00:55:27All right?
00:55:27And then we'll have a nice, small, intimate affair.
00:55:30A wedding with Coldplay.
00:55:33No Coldplay, Dad.
00:55:35No Coldplay.
00:55:36No Coldplay.
00:55:37So, it's about my cancer treatment.
00:55:47It's not working.
00:55:49I know it.
00:55:50I talked to my doctors yesterday.
00:55:53And I'm cured.
00:55:55What?
00:55:56You're cured?
00:55:58Oh, congratulations.
00:56:02I wasn't expecting it.
00:56:04I didn't think I would be cured in only two sessions.
00:56:07It only took two sessions?
00:56:10I almost had enough in my savings to cover that.
00:56:13Maybe I didn't need the Dina Valino's money.
00:56:16What's wrong, sis?
00:56:17We should be celebrating!
00:56:20I brought Prosecco.
00:56:21No.
00:56:22Yeah.
00:56:23No, I'm good.
00:56:24Yeah.
00:56:26Amelia, I'm your sister.
00:56:28You can tell me anything.
00:56:31Is it Michelangelo?
00:56:33Is everything okay?
00:56:34If that punk, pretty boy hurts you, I will take that man thong and give him a wedgie so
00:56:40far up his butt that it will cut him in two.
00:56:43It's not Michelangelo, Betsy.
00:56:47It's me.
00:56:50I have to tell you something.
00:56:51I cannot believe that they convinced you to do an arranged marriage?
00:57:01What is this, Game of Thrones?
00:57:03It was the only way that I could pay for your treatments.
00:57:06And you know that I would do anything for you.
00:57:09Actually, he's not that bad.
00:57:13I kind of like him.
00:57:14Yeah, babe, that's called Stockholm Syndrome.
00:57:18We need to get you out of there.
00:57:21Betsy, I have real feelings for him.
00:57:26But what about the tabloid stories?
00:57:30You heard what he did to that floozy in Disney World.
00:57:33They banned him for life.
00:57:35You'll never go to Epcot.
00:57:36He's not actually like the stories.
00:57:40Or at least not to me.
00:57:43He's only acting like that to get into your pants, Amelia.
00:57:47If you marry Michelangelo, he will make your life a living hell.
00:57:53What if you meet him?
00:57:56Yeah, meet him.
00:57:58Maybe he'll change your mind.
00:57:59Maybe you'll actually like him.
00:58:01Don't count on it.
00:58:03Please, me, just give him a chance.
00:58:07Fine.
00:58:08Yes.
00:58:09Only one.
00:58:10Yes.
00:58:13You won't regret it.
00:58:14I'm going to go get the Prosecco.
00:58:18You better bring the whole bottle.
00:58:23Thank you for making dinner.
00:58:25Of course.
00:58:26I'm glad she's cancer-free.
00:58:28We need to celebrate.
00:58:32Michelangelo,
00:58:33you know that Betsy is the most important person in the world.
00:58:36to me, right?
00:58:37You mean besides me?
00:58:39I'm serious.
00:58:40It's really important to me that you two get along.
00:58:43Have a glass of wine.
00:58:46Tonight's going to be great.
00:58:56It's enormous.
00:58:58It's enormous.
00:58:58Why would anybody need so much room?
00:59:05It's nice to see you too, sis.
00:59:09Nice to finally meet you, Betsy.
00:59:11So, this is the infamous, uh, Michelangelo.
00:59:21How about we start off with a glass of champagne?
00:59:25$96 Dom Perignon?
00:59:26Amelia said that's the year that you were born.
00:59:29Yeah, sorry, I can't drink that fancy stuff.
00:59:32It's worth more than my car.
00:59:33Why would anybody spend that much on a drink?
00:59:35$8.99 at Ralph's.
00:59:40It's delicious.
00:59:42This was made in France.
00:59:44Sorry.
00:59:45Can't touch that stuff.
00:59:47So,
00:59:48who wants a drink?
00:59:49Who wants a drink?
00:59:49You hardly touch your food.
01:00:13It's a little too rich for me.
01:00:18Mine tastes great.
01:00:19So, Michelangelo,
01:00:22I have some big sister questions
01:00:25to ask about the prenuptials coming up.
01:00:28You don't mind, do you?
01:00:30Fire away.
01:00:32So, I know you two have been having your...
01:00:35fun.
01:00:37Um, but...
01:00:39what's this relationship gonna look like
01:00:41once that honeymoon phase wears off?
01:00:44I don't think it's going to.
01:00:47That's cute and all, but...
01:00:49what about her career?
01:00:50Are you going to support her?
01:00:52Or kids, what's your stance on that?
01:00:54Or are you just going to jump to the next person
01:00:56once you get bored and this gets too serious?
01:00:58Betsy!
01:00:59Look,
01:01:00I know I have a past,
01:01:03but I'm committed to her.
01:01:05We haven't talked about kids, but I'm open to anything.
01:01:09See, Michelangelo, that's my point.
01:01:11You two are getting married and you barely know each other.
01:01:14We know enough.
01:01:16Easy, Betsy.
01:01:17I just think it's a bad idea getting married this soon.
01:01:22And if you really cared about Amelia,
01:01:24you would give her the time.
01:01:26And what makes you such an expert?
01:01:28I don't see a ring on your finger.
01:01:31Michelangelo...
01:01:31You probably picked them apart
01:01:33the way you're doing me right now.
01:01:34It's no wonder Amelia was so uptight when I met her.
01:01:36She gets it from you.
01:01:38Are you going to let him talk to me like that, Amelia?
01:01:40You started it.
01:01:47Why don't we all just calm down?
01:01:51Betsy's just looking out for my best interests.
01:01:53No, she's alone and miserable
01:01:54and trying to drag you down with her.
01:01:56That's not fair, Michelangelo.
01:01:58She's not been fair to me since she walked through the door.
01:02:00You're the horniest bastard in Beverly Hills.
01:02:02And you're a frigid, lonely woman
01:02:04who cannot stand to see her sister happy.
01:02:06You know what?
01:02:07You can't talk to Betsy like that.
01:02:08That's my sister.
01:02:09She just survived cancer.
01:02:13That doesn't give her a right to insult me
01:02:15inside my own house.
01:02:16This is my house, too,
01:02:18and she can say whatever she wants.
01:02:19Not to me!
01:02:20You know, maybe she should be concerned.
01:02:22I don't like this side of you.
01:02:23See, I told you you should have spent more time
01:02:25getting to know each other,
01:02:26but I guess the contract doesn't allow for that.
01:02:29You told her?
01:02:30She's my sister.
01:02:31I don't care.
01:02:32That violates our agreement.
01:02:33Oh, is that all I am to you?
01:02:35A contractual agreement?
01:02:36Some kind of obligation?
01:02:38It's not what I meant.
01:02:39It came out wrong, Amelia.
01:02:41I love you.
01:02:43You love me?
01:02:45Don't listen to him.
01:02:46He doesn't even know what that means.
01:02:47Shut the fuck up!
01:02:49You know what?
01:02:50Maybe she was right.
01:02:51I shouldn't have signed that contract.
01:02:53It's over.
01:02:53We need to get out of here.
01:03:02I've seen too many true crime documentaries on Netflix
01:03:04to know what happens when you tell rich people secrets.
01:03:11Amelia,
01:03:11I know this is hard to hear,
01:03:14but
01:03:14you did the right thing.
01:03:17You do so much better than him.
01:03:19Yeah.
01:03:22But he isn't a monster.
01:03:23I shouldn't have said that.
01:03:25We can talk about it on the road.
01:03:27Get packing,
01:03:29and if we leave now,
01:03:30we can get to Mexico by dawn.
01:03:31Lay low for a bit.
01:03:33Mexico?
01:03:34Or Canada.
01:03:35Whatever.
01:03:36It's that,
01:03:36or stay here and get sued
01:03:37by the Dino Lavinos.
01:03:40Or worse.
01:03:41I don't think Romulus and Michelangelo would sue us.
01:03:44I mean,
01:03:45I only told you about the contract.
01:03:47It's not like I told the media.
01:03:49You don't know that.
01:03:51We're liabilities.
01:03:53Loose ends.
01:03:55You should listen to more True Kind podcast.
01:04:00Get rid of that thing.
01:04:02They could be tracking us right now.
01:04:05Yeah, you know,
01:04:06Michelangelo did manage to follow me to the ecoplex the other day.
01:04:09See?
01:04:11You could have a sniper on us.
01:04:17It's Romulus.
01:04:19Hey, Romulus.
01:04:21What?
01:04:22What do you mean Gucci's missing?
01:04:36You came.
01:04:39Against my better judgment.
01:04:41I'm not happy you've been blowing me off.
01:04:44I've just been busy,
01:04:45but it's over with now.
01:04:49You should punish me for straying.
01:04:54You make me sick.
01:04:55I make me sick.
01:04:57I make me sick.
01:05:05Nice underwear.
01:05:10It's a great craftsmanship.
01:05:11Okay, let's get this over with.
01:05:21Is that all you have to say?
01:05:23Do you even realize how hot I am?
01:05:26I'm sorry, Chantel.
01:05:30I thought I wanted this.
01:05:32But I don't.
01:05:36I'm not the stud that I used to be.
01:05:41Amelia broke up with me.
01:05:47It feels like she's stomping on my heart with one of your shoes.
01:05:50Never in a million years did I think I'd fall for a dog walk with my hair.
01:05:55I am fucking devastated.
01:05:58And all her wishes I could take back how I acted.
01:06:01And she just wanted to come back to me.
01:06:03She's gone?
01:06:20I'll be right there.
01:06:29Romulus.
01:06:30What?
01:06:30Hold on.
01:06:32Oh.
01:06:33What?
01:06:33Well, I only had him off the leash for a second, you know.
01:06:37We're practically in the house, and then all of a sudden, he just shot off like a rocket.
01:06:41I've been calling him all night, but he won't come back!
01:06:45Well, we can help you find him.
01:06:48Yeah.
01:06:49Right?
01:06:51Good, thanks.
01:06:53Gucci.
01:06:54This better not be a trap.
01:06:56Just come on.
01:06:59Gucci!
01:07:00Gucci!
01:07:01Gucci!
01:07:02Hey, hey, hey, where's Michelangelo?
01:07:03Huh?
01:07:04Huh?
01:07:04I thought you were both together.
01:07:05Why isn't he here with you?
01:07:07Oh, um, he's...
01:07:08Sorry, I'm late, Dad.
01:07:11Where were you?
01:07:12I had to stop for late night delivery at Mastriani's.
01:07:15It's Gucci's favorite prosciutto.
01:07:17If this doesn't ring out of hiding, nothing will.
01:07:20Smart move, kid.
01:07:22Here, ladies.
01:07:23Take a piece of this prosciutto here.
01:07:25That's it.
01:07:25Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:07:26Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:07:26Give me the urc.
01:07:41Gucci!
01:07:47He's hopeless.
01:07:48We've been looking for him all night long.
01:07:53We're never gonna find him.
01:07:55Don't give up, Dad.
01:07:55He's just off having a little adventure.
01:07:58Keep looking.
01:07:58He'll turn up in a few minutes.
01:08:01See?
01:08:02They're not gonna kill us.
01:08:04I do have to admit, though,
01:08:06I didn't expect to see this side of him.
01:08:08He's really there for his dad.
01:08:11His dad's dog.
01:08:12So you approve now?
01:08:15They didn't say that.
01:08:19Gucci!
01:08:23Gucci!
01:08:24My boy's back!
01:08:26Oh!
01:08:33Okay, okay.
01:08:35I'm a little closer to approving.
01:08:42I might have possibly misjudged you.
01:08:51A little.
01:08:53It's okay.
01:08:54Most of what the tabloids publish is true.
01:08:57They just leave out part of the story.
01:09:00Amelia, can we talk?
01:09:06Please?
01:09:09Amelia, can we talk?
01:09:12Please?
01:09:15Okay.
01:09:24Amelia, I'm sorry about earlier tonight.
01:09:29I shouldn't have attacked your sister,
01:09:32and I shouldn't have blown up at you
01:09:33for mentioning the contract.
01:09:38I hope that you know you mean so much more to me
01:09:40than just a business agreement.
01:09:44Thanks for saying that.
01:09:46I needed to hear that.
01:09:49And I'm sorry for calling you a monster.
01:09:53You're not one.
01:09:55I'm still learning new things about you.
01:09:58Most of them are good.
01:10:01I'm happy we signed the contract.
01:10:04I'm not.
01:10:05You're not.
01:10:08What do you mean?
01:10:12Amelia, this might sound crazy, but
01:10:15I meant it when I said that I love you.
01:10:19And I don't want some silly piece of paper
01:10:21to be the reason that we stay together.
01:10:25I want to know that our love is real.
01:10:29Dad.
01:10:30What is this, son?
01:10:32I want to cancel the contract
01:10:34between me and Amelia.
01:10:36Why, son?
01:10:38Because I want to ask her to marry me.
01:10:41And not because of some legal obligation,
01:10:47but because she wants to.
01:10:53Consider our contract null and void.
01:10:56Amelia, where will it be?
01:11:08Will you marry me?
01:11:12Will you marry me?
01:11:15Yes.
01:11:16I'll marry you.
01:11:17I'll marry you.
01:11:17You've made me the happiest underwear model in the world.
01:11:36And I'm the happiest dog walker.
01:11:39Look at me.
01:11:40I'm dripping like a Roman aqueduct.
01:11:44All right, all right, you two.
01:11:46That's enough, all right?
01:11:48We spent this whole night together.
01:11:50Come over to my place, all right?
01:11:52We'll have a nice breakfast, Italian style.
01:11:55Hopefully it's not too rich for you.
01:11:58I think I can get used to it.
01:12:00And then we can all discuss the wedding, all right?
01:12:03I want to hear from everybody involved,
01:12:05especially Coldplay.
01:12:07We're not getting Coldplay, Dad.
01:12:10It was worth a try.
01:12:11Okay.
01:12:17And now the bride and groom would like to give their vows.
01:12:38Michelangelo?
01:12:42Amelia, even though we're far from a perfect couple,
01:12:48we're perfect together.
01:12:50I've learned so much from you in such a short amount of time and not just about dogs.
01:12:58I don't know how I ever managed anything without you.
01:13:02I'm looking forward to your support and counsel as I take over the family business from my father this year.
01:13:13And in return, I promise to be patient and a loving husband as you turn our backyard into the doggy daycare you've always dreamed of.
01:13:25Amelia, you're the only thing better than free underwear.
01:13:36I love you so much.
01:13:44I never thought I would end up with a former man-thong model, but here we are.
01:13:50Michelangelo, you've helped me come out of my shell,
01:13:53and you've taught me how to live life to the fullest,
01:13:55something I hope to do more of on our honeymoon in Italy.
01:14:03And although we haven't spent much time together,
01:14:06it feels like a lifetime, in a good way.
01:14:09I know your mom would be proud of you.
01:14:11Te amo, Michelangelo.
01:14:13I love you.
01:14:14With the power vested in me by Almighty God and the city of Beverly Hills,
01:14:19I now pronounce you husband and wife.
01:14:22You may kiss your bride.
01:14:32Thanks.
01:14:33I'm Betsy.
01:14:35Amelia's sister.
01:14:37I'm Jake.
01:14:38Another dog walker.
01:14:40It's crazy.
01:14:41You know, giving my sister.
01:14:43But I've always been more of a cat person.
01:14:46Me too.
01:14:48Oh.
01:14:50Oh.
01:14:50Oh.
01:14:59Oh.
01:15:00Oh.
01:15:00Oh.
01:15:01Oh.
01:15:02Oh.
01:15:03Oh.
01:15:03Oh.
01:15:03Oh.
01:15:03Oh.
01:15:04Oh.
01:15:04Oh.
01:15:04Oh.
01:15:04Oh.
01:15:05Oh.
01:15:06Oh.
01:15:06Oh.
01:15:07Oh.
01:15:07Oh.
01:15:07Oh.
01:15:07Oh.
01:15:08Oh.
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