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El Multimillonario Secreto Regresa en Navidad En Español
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Transcript
00:00:00Nothing wrong with a road trip.
00:00:01I'm gonna go home for Christmas with my wife and tell her who I really am.
00:00:05The only thing this family wants for Christmas is for you to get out of our lives.
00:00:09And he stole these gifts.
00:00:11I'm gonna take care of you and your sweet mom from now on.
00:00:15Daddy, what's happening?
00:00:16I have been waiting for years to humiliate you.
00:00:20Take that again, bitch!
00:00:24Everyone, please!
00:00:26We're supposed to be a family!
00:00:28I don't care about jobs or money.
00:00:32I only care about you.
00:00:33My dad's not a loser!
00:00:39$30,000!
00:00:40Just put it on my black card.
00:00:42What is going on?
00:00:43Who are you?
00:00:44It's finally time to reveal my identity to the mom.
00:00:58Merry Christmas, Mr. Ray!
00:01:08Merry Christmas, Mr. CEO.
00:01:10Congratulations on your $14 billion market valuation.
00:01:14Bravo!
00:01:14You sure you won't take the Jets, sir?
00:01:30You're CEO of a multi-billion dollar company.
00:01:32This truck is just...
00:01:33There's nothing wrong with a road trip.
00:01:35I want to keep it a surprise.
00:01:37I'm gonna go home for Christmas with my wife and tell her who I really am.
00:01:40Big City Company, Maple Tech, is coming to our town to build a mall.
00:01:57Bring everyone jobs.
00:01:58Don't y'all forget, as mayor, I'm the one that made this happen.
00:02:03I am putting our town on the map.
00:02:06Maple Tech's CEO, Mr. A, did those things.
00:02:10He built the company from scratch.
00:02:12He is bringing jobs.
00:02:15Yes.
00:02:16And as mayor, I brought Maple Tech here.
00:02:18And its mysterious CEO.
00:02:21Me.
00:02:22When do we get to meet the CEO?
00:02:24He'll be here tomorrow.
00:02:25And I'm gonna throw him a big old welcome party
00:02:27where he will finally reveal his identity to me.
00:02:30To us.
00:02:31Mom, I can't wait to see Daddy.
00:02:34He'll be here soon.
00:02:35Come on.
00:02:37Jane?
00:02:39Jane Reynolds?
00:02:41You look as stunning as you did in high school.
00:02:43You're not still married to that punching bag loser, Eddie?
00:02:51My dad's not a loser.
00:02:54Oh, darling.
00:02:56When we were in high school, your daddy was a big-time loser.
00:02:59He was going nowhere with his life.
00:03:05Which is why he skipped town and left you and your mom in shame.
00:03:11Making fun of a little girl at Christmastime.
00:03:15Are you sure you're this town's mayor or just its local Scrooge?
00:03:19And the mall looks great, y'all.
00:03:21You really didn't have to do all this for me.
00:03:23It's Mr. Andrews, our CEO.
00:03:25No, that's the Maple Tech CEO.
00:03:27He's a day early.
00:03:31I am so sorry, sir.
00:03:33We were not expecting you until tomorrow.
00:03:35But let me be the first to say that.
00:03:37We're finally...
00:03:37Daddy's home!
00:03:42The...
00:03:42The loser, Eddie Andrews.
00:03:48Can't possibly be the Maple Tech CEO.
00:03:58False alarm, everyone!
00:04:00It's not the CEO.
00:04:01It's a deadbeat loser that I used to beat up in high school.
00:04:05Jane, I know I've been gone for far too long.
00:04:09But I've been working.
00:04:11I'm just glad you're home.
00:04:12Make sure you come back tomorrow, where we will welcome a man who is exactly the opposite
00:04:20of Eddie.
00:04:20A real man!
00:04:22A rich man!
00:04:23A CEO!
00:04:25The CEOs, right?
00:04:29Duncan, don't tell me you're still jealous that Jane picked me over you.
00:04:32Son of a...
00:04:33Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to kiss my wife and take her home.
00:04:37My family's home, Monday.
00:04:55Sir, when are you going to reveal to these people that you're CEO?
00:04:58Soon.
00:04:59But I want to spend Christmas with my family and tell them first.
00:05:03Yes.
00:05:04That's the CEO!
00:05:05He's hot!
00:05:10Hey, Andy!
00:05:11Woo-hoo-hoo!
00:05:14We're just so glad you're here.
00:05:16It's been so hard being apart for so long.
00:05:18Well, I am never, ever going to leave my family ever again.
00:05:21Okay?
00:05:23Well, well, well.
00:05:25Deadbeat husband and father finally returns.
00:05:28The only thing this family wants for Christmas is for you to get out of our lives.
00:05:36Divorce Jane now.
00:05:38Mom, what are you doing?
00:05:43What you should have done years ago.
00:05:45Your husband was a loser back then, and he clearly still is.
00:05:49Sasha, don't listen to them.
00:05:51Dad, tell mom that she was being crazy.
00:05:56Eddie, Maple Tech came this Christmas.
00:05:58All the real men in town got great jobs.
00:06:01You're still a loser.
00:06:03Hey.
00:06:04Shame!
00:06:06Princess?
00:06:07Don't listen to your grandma, okay?
00:06:09She's just tired.
00:06:10Tired of you?
00:06:11You worthless.
00:06:12Can you not take that tone in front of my daughter?
00:06:15I'm teaching her manners and respect.
00:06:17Respect?
00:06:18Respect this family by leaving it.
00:06:21Sign the divorce papers.
00:06:25It's okay.
00:06:26I'll read it.
00:06:28Please.
00:06:29You can probably barely read.
00:06:31Our lawyer spent days on this.
00:06:33You can't comprehend it.
00:06:35You know what?
00:06:36I may just be a small town boy, but even I can see this document is rather flawed.
00:06:42You don't know anything about the laws.
00:06:43Yes, I'm going to get our lawyer on the phone to rip you a new one.
00:06:47He's so good, he does contracts for Maple Tech.
00:06:51Bob.
00:06:51Okay.
00:06:52Our worthless son-in-law is being annoying.
00:06:54Tell him what will happen to him if he doesn't sign.
00:06:58Gladly.
00:06:58What's that idiot saying?
00:07:00Bob, is it?
00:07:02Great to meet you.
00:07:03I just wanted to let you know this document is pretty flawed.
00:07:06Already I'm seeing in Clause A, Subsection B, that there's no legal precedent.
00:07:11And did I hear right?
00:07:12You know that you work for Maple Tech?
00:07:14That's interesting.
00:07:16That voice.
00:07:17Um, you're right, sir.
00:07:19Don't sign it.
00:07:20I'm sorry to have bothered you.
00:07:22Ms. Reynolds, I resign as your attorney.
00:07:24Don't call me again.
00:07:27What?
00:07:29How do we recognize your voice?
00:07:34How do we recognize your voice?
00:07:36What in God's name?
00:07:37We paid our lawyer thousands of dollars to make that divorce agreement.
00:07:42How do nobody like Eddie know more than him?
00:07:45He's unemployed, so he has all the time in the world to read Wikipedia like an idiot.
00:07:50That's how.
00:07:52Daddy, why is Grandma mad?
00:07:55It's Christmas.
00:07:56I know.
00:07:57But everything's going to be just fine.
00:07:59Let's go inside, Lori.
00:08:00I'm not dropping, Miss Eddie.
00:08:07This Christmas, I will get Jane to dump you.
00:08:09I have a plan.
00:08:10With all due respect, Mrs. Reynolds, your daughter is the love of my life.
00:08:16And no amount of money could ever make me leave her.
00:08:19I wish Jane would have married a real man.
00:08:21Like Jared.
00:08:23Oh, look.
00:08:24There he is now.
00:08:25Jane Reynolds, you look more stunning than I remember.
00:08:34Eddie!
00:08:37The last time I remember seeing you, me and the future mayor were stuffing you in a locker.
00:08:45Wasn't that the first time that Jane rejected you for me?
00:08:51You want another beatdown?
00:08:55Sasha, go play with your cousin Robbie, okay?
00:09:01Hi, cousin Robbie.
00:09:03Can I play?
00:09:08Ha ha!
00:09:09My prince said you're dead to loser.
00:09:10That means you are too.
00:09:12Ha ha ha ha ha ha!
00:09:14Mr. and Mrs. Reynolds, what a pleasure.
00:09:18Oh, you look so handsome and successful.
00:09:22Definitely Jane.
00:09:23I mean, he looks better than he did in high school with that ridiculous mullet.
00:09:29Jane, show some respect.
00:09:31Jared is a highly successful businessman.
00:09:34He's an executive at Maple Tech.
00:09:36Oh, really?
00:09:37Uh-huh.
00:09:38An executive.
00:09:38Well, then you must have met the CEO, right?
00:09:42Well, what do you tell us?
00:09:43How is the big man?
00:09:45How is the big man?
00:09:46You're goddamn right I've met the CEO.
00:09:52He's a great man.
00:09:53He's entrusted me.
00:09:55I'm basically running the company office here in town and the mall project.
00:10:01Wow.
00:10:02You work for Maple Tech?
00:10:05Really?
00:10:05I sure do, kid.
00:10:09And your dad?
00:10:10He wouldn't know that kind of success.
00:10:12Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!
00:10:14Would you, Eddie?
00:10:15Ha ha, Sasha!
00:10:16Your dad's a loser!
00:10:19Hey, princess.
00:10:21Don't worry.
00:10:22I've got a feeling that Jared is going to eat his words.
00:10:25Get what he deserves pretty soon.
00:10:27The only thing Jared deserves is a promotion.
00:10:32He's big at Maple Tech.
00:10:33The CEO, he'll probably be calling and promoting me any day now.
00:10:37Don't worry about Eddie, Mrs. Reynolds.
00:10:39He's just jealous.
00:10:41Come on, everyone.
00:10:42It's Christmas, okay?
00:10:45Come on, let's go.
00:10:45Come on, let's go.
00:10:52Why is that man Jared so mean?
00:10:55You know why?
00:10:56It's because successful men, they don't brag.
00:11:00They're humble.
00:11:02Hey, you want to watch Daddy teach Jared a little Christmas lesson?
00:11:07It'll be our little secret, okay?
00:11:13Hey, we hired a local middle manager named Jared.
00:11:17Demote him for me.
00:11:18Yes, right away, Mr. A.
00:11:24Hey.
00:11:25Hey.
00:11:26What?
00:11:27Jeannie.
00:11:28Eddie can't give you what you deserve.
00:11:30With my high-paying job, I could give you it all.
00:11:34Jared, I'm married.
00:11:36You and Jared would make such a beautiful match.
00:11:38Yeah, middle management, it has its perks.
00:11:41I could take you out on the company dime.
00:11:43Maybe get us a little hotel suite.
00:11:45Oh, something tells me you're not management material, Jared.
00:11:50Eddie, stop.
00:11:52What would you know about who or what Maple Tech material is?
00:11:58You're not cut out to wash the floors at the mall.
00:12:01I'm just saying, maybe you should check on your current job status.
00:12:05What are you doing, Eddie?
00:12:07I want you to go home for good.
00:12:09So stop antagonizing Maple Tech.
00:12:11They are the biggest employer in town.
00:12:13Eddie isn't the kind of guy that Maple Tech would hire.
00:12:16Trust me.
00:12:17I know the CEO.
00:12:19The only thing I need to question about my job status is how soon they're going to be promoting me.
00:12:28It's Mrs. Henderson.
00:12:30Maple Tech VP.
00:12:32Oh, exciting.
00:12:33He's getting promoted.
00:12:37I'm going to get a promotion, and then you're going to be mine, Jane.
00:12:41You're not getting promoted, Jared.
00:12:44You're getting demoted.
00:12:47Mrs. Henderson, what an honor it is to speak with you again.
00:12:52Again?
00:12:53We've never met.
00:12:54And despite what you've been saying, you have no idea who our CEO is.
00:12:59You're not Maple Tech management material.
00:13:01We're demoting you to mailroom duties.
00:13:04What?
00:13:05But why?
00:13:07Please, no, no!
00:13:09What?
00:13:10What did you do, loser?
00:13:12Eddie, how did you know that?
00:13:14Only the CEO could have known that.
00:13:16The CEO?
00:13:19Eddie?
00:13:23Eddie, what's going on?
00:13:24Are you seeing...
00:13:25Oh!
00:13:29He didn't do anything.
00:13:31This is a big misunderstanding.
00:13:33I'm going to go inside.
00:13:34I didn't make a phone call.
00:13:35Me too.
00:13:36Sorry.
00:13:36Craig?
00:13:45Craig?
00:13:46Stop drinking and help me!
00:13:48I got a bad bag, woman.
00:13:50It depends.
00:13:50Oh, Christ, I have losers here.
00:13:55Eddie, I remember my brother Craig and his wife Christina.
00:13:59Yeah.
00:14:00Yeah, of course.
00:14:01Merry Christmas, T-Bow.
00:14:02Uh, you're still married to this deadbeat, Jane?
00:14:07Nuh-uh.
00:14:08No presents for losing kids and their deadbeat dads.
00:14:11Ha-ha!
00:14:12Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!
00:14:14Oh, that's my baby!
00:14:17He's a slut!
00:14:19Jane, I don't know what your husband did with my job, but I'm going to sort it out.
00:14:23Wow, Jared!
00:14:25This is the best gift ever!
00:14:27Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!
00:14:29Robbie, can I play with it?
00:14:31Don't tell your navigate you want.
00:14:34Aw.
00:14:35Mm.
00:14:35Aw.
00:14:36Robbie, don't rub salt in Sasha's wounds.
00:14:41Come on.
00:14:41Her dad's too poor to buy her Christmas gifts.
00:14:45Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!
00:14:47That's, uh...
00:14:48Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!
00:14:49Actually, uh, that's wrong.
00:14:51I did get her a Christmas gift.
00:14:53In fact, it's Maple Tech's new state-of-the-art virtual reality console.
00:15:00Virtual reality?
00:15:02Wow, it's Alan!
00:15:04Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!
00:15:04No way!
00:15:05I don't believe it!
00:15:08Eddie, you really got her that?
00:15:09Of course not.
00:15:11Maple Tech hasn't even released that set to market yet.
00:15:13No one can buy it.
00:15:15LOL, Eddie.
00:15:16The new VR system from Maple Tech cost over $30,000.
00:15:20You're lying to an eight-year-old.
00:15:23You have no shame.
00:15:26Jane, this is how low your pathetic husband is stooped.
00:15:30Eddie, the holidays can be hard on a struggling parent.
00:15:34You don't have to lie.
00:15:35Just admit, you're too poor to buy your kid a gift.
00:15:40It's okay.
00:15:41But I was so excited.
00:15:43Sasha, honey, your dad didn't mean that.
00:15:48I let you get it.
00:15:50A small gift.
00:15:51No, I did mean it.
00:15:53It's just waiting to be delivered at the local Maple Tech R&D warehouse.
00:15:57You are a lying sack of...
00:15:59It's not a toy store.
00:16:03It's a top-secret classified facility.
00:16:06Employees don't even have access.
00:16:08A worthless, unemployed nobody sure won't.
00:16:10You just don't get any toy gifts.
00:16:12Ha ha!
00:16:13Ha ha ha!
00:16:17Jared, Jared, Jared.
00:16:19You never learn, do you?
00:16:22I know the location of the secret warehouse.
00:16:25I even know the security code.
00:16:28Eddie, just stop.
00:16:30You are upsetting Sasha and getting your hopes up.
00:16:33You're shameless.
00:16:34You're...
00:16:35Jesus.
00:16:40The address of the warehouse is on it.
00:16:43On company letterhead.
00:16:47How do you know top-secret company information?
00:16:50That's a crime.
00:16:51How?
00:16:52How is this loser connected to the most powerful new tech company in the country?
00:16:57Eddie, what's going on?
00:16:59First you get Jared demoted from Maple Tech, and now this.
00:17:04Someone in the company leaked classified information to him.
00:17:09That's a crime.
00:17:10Who told you?
00:17:12Hmm?
00:17:13I'm going to turn you in, deadbeat, and I'm going to get my job back.
00:17:16Your dad's a liar and in trouble.
00:17:25No, he isn't, and I'll prove it.
00:17:27You're pathetic.
00:17:29Eddie, hashtag sad.
00:17:31Oh, Christina, your husband is the pathetic one.
00:17:35He is...
00:17:35Oh, yeah.
00:17:36He is always drunk.
00:17:37At least my husband is an attentive father to our child.
00:17:40What did you say about me?
00:17:42Say that again, bitch!
00:18:00Everyone, please!
00:18:02We're supposed to be a family, and it's Christmas time.
00:18:05Wait, where's Sasha?
00:18:10Sasha?
00:18:11Sasha?
00:18:12Sasha?
00:18:13Sasha?
00:18:14She isn't here?
00:18:15Where did she go?
00:18:16What?
00:18:17This is what you get from being a bad father, Eddie.
00:18:22It's okay.
00:18:24I'll find her, Jane.
00:18:25Damn it, Eddie.
00:18:26She could be lost, kidnapped, worse.
00:18:29I'm gonna find the gift to prove that my daddy isn't a liar.
00:18:48You are not going anywhere.
00:18:53You abandoned this town and family long ago.
00:18:56You can't find Sasha.
00:18:58Eddie, why did you pretend to get her gift?
00:19:01Now she is missing!
00:19:02I will find her.
00:19:03Oh, no, you won't.
00:19:05I called a real man to help.
00:19:07A powerful man who gets things done, unlike you.
00:19:10I'm not surprised Eddie ran his kid off.
00:19:13Don't worry, folks.
00:19:16I got this, darling.
00:19:19Got my top man on it, and, uh...
00:19:23We'll find the girl.
00:19:25I will find my daughter.
00:19:30Well?
00:19:31Thank God almighty that deadbeat is gone.
00:19:34Now the real men can get down to work and we can find her.
00:19:37Come on, this place has to look perfect before our CEO arrives.
00:19:46How'd you get in here, little one?
00:19:47I'm supposed to get my present.
00:19:48This is a Fortune 500 company.
00:19:49It ain't some toy store.
00:19:50Get her out of here.
00:19:51I have permission and a receipt.
00:19:53How'd...
00:19:54I have permission and a receipt.
00:19:55How'd...
00:19:56It's our location.
00:19:57And access code.
00:19:58And it's signed for our CEO!
00:19:59Come on.
00:20:00I have permission and a receipt.
00:20:01How'd...
00:20:02How'd...
00:20:03It's our location?
00:20:04And access code.
00:20:05And it's signed for our CEO!
00:20:06Get her out of here.
00:20:09I have permission and a receipt.
00:20:12How'd it's our location and access code and a sign for our CEO?
00:20:21And I don't care what you have to do.
00:20:22Just find her.
00:20:24It's an order.
00:20:27Duncan, please find my daughter.
00:20:29We're searching.
00:20:30We just haven't found her yet.
00:20:32But we...
00:20:32I will, Janie.
00:20:36I will.
00:20:39Have the bodyguards pick me up and take me to the R&D warehouse now.
00:20:42You're going to find her?
00:20:43She's missing because of you.
00:20:45You're going to stay here to suffer the consequences.
00:20:47I don't have time to play these games.
00:20:49What are you going to do, asshat?
00:20:57Where did you get this note from?
00:21:01I gave it to her mom.
00:21:04Mr. A?
00:21:05I...
00:21:06Welcome.
00:21:07Welcome.
00:21:09Angel, you should have said something.
00:21:11I didn't know he was your daddy.
00:21:16Great.
00:21:19I have checkpoints set up, but my idiot men can't find her.
00:21:22Sasha?
00:21:28Hey, it's Calista.
00:21:29I just got a glimpse of the Maple Tech CEO.
00:21:33Okay, I've never met your husband, but he is hotter.
00:21:36I just took a photo.
00:21:37I don't have time for this.
00:21:43Oh, God.
00:21:43Maybe Eddie can find her.
00:21:45Eddie?
00:21:45The day he can do anything with his miserable life will be the day pigs fly.
00:21:49Sasha, is that you, baby?
00:21:59No.
00:22:01It's just your loser husband.
00:22:02Giving up already, Eddie?
00:22:06I knew you couldn't find Sasha.
00:22:10You found her?
00:22:11What the hell?
00:22:14Thank God.
00:22:15Why did you run away like that?
00:22:16I was so worried about you.
00:22:18Because her dad's a liar.
00:22:20He wanted a gift you pretended to get.
00:22:22It was all Eddie's fault.
00:22:24You had my men out there searching for your runaway child
00:22:27because you lied about a fancy gift that we know you can't afford?
00:22:34Hey, hey, check it out, check it out.
00:22:38Check it out, check it out.
00:22:46No way!
00:22:47Me are set cool!
00:22:49What?
00:22:52It costs more than my annual salary.
00:22:54Sasha, you're lucky to have such a great dad who got that for you.
00:23:03Merry Christmas, everyone!
00:23:05Merry Christmas!
00:23:07Woo!
00:23:08All right.
00:23:12Eddie?
00:23:13How did you do that?
00:23:15I told you.
00:23:18I wasn't lying.
00:23:23Oh, God damn it.
00:23:25I have important things I need to tend to.
00:23:28Everyone will remember to come to my party where I will welcome the CEO.
00:23:32Everyone.
00:23:34Except Eddie.
00:23:35Eddie?
00:23:40Hmm.
00:23:41The CEO?
00:23:48Is that Eddie?
00:23:51Eddie was telling the truth about getting the gift?
00:23:54How do you afford it?
00:23:56Sasha, let me play with it!
00:24:00Robbie, what about the toy plate I got for you?
00:24:03It's custom, and maybe one of the...
00:24:05My turn, me first!
00:24:08Okay.
00:24:08Hey, Robbie, this is Sasha's toy, okay?
00:24:13But, it's Christmas time, and at Christmas, we're very kind to each other, aren't we?
00:24:18So maybe if you ask Sasha really nicely, she'll share.
00:24:23I'm sorry I was mean, Cousin Sasha.
00:24:25Now, we've been married for years.
00:24:35I would know if Eddie was CEO.
00:24:38Hmm.
00:24:39All that matters is he's a great father.
00:24:43Janie, uh, now that your husband blew his entire life savings trying to impress the kids,
00:24:47maybe I could take you out.
00:24:48Pass.
00:24:49It's Christmas, Jared.
00:24:51My husband is the only one for me.
00:24:53Don't be discouraged, Jared.
00:24:57You can still win Jane from him.
00:25:05Family, it's time to go to Grandma's house for Christmas!
00:25:12Ha ha!
00:25:13Hey, will you kids be all right here?
00:25:14Yes, Grandpa Lewis!
00:25:16Oh, let's go!
00:25:18Come on!
00:25:19Bye!
00:25:20Nice work, Eddie.
00:25:22Keep it up and impressing Grandma.
00:25:24Family will follow up.
00:25:25Mm-hmm.
00:25:31Hello?
00:25:32Hey.
00:25:32You brought this man into my house, and your mom said that you were divorcing him.
00:25:41Uh, actually, Jane and I do love each other very much, and I wanted to show you...
00:25:45Hey, don't listen to this loser, Ima!
00:25:47I brought cookies!
00:25:48Oh, my grandson's crazy!
00:25:49Hey!
00:25:49Hey!
00:25:49Oh, and his beautiful wife, Christina!
00:25:54Thanks for having us, Grandma!
00:25:57Eddie and Jane didn't want to come!
00:25:59Sure!
00:26:01Oh, Melinda, I don't understand.
00:26:04I thought you said that she was divorcing that bomb.
00:26:06Grandma, Eddie is my husband.
00:26:08Well, we tried, Mom.
00:26:09We're still trying.
00:26:11Oh, good, good.
00:26:12Everybody, sit down.
00:26:13Sit down.
00:26:13Oh, you know that nice boy, Duncan?
00:26:16You know, he's the mayor now.
00:26:19Janie, you and him, we look great together.
00:26:23Duncan is a friend of mine.
00:26:25He actually happens to be the mayor.
00:26:27He's amounted a lot more than you.
00:26:29What have you ever done?
00:26:30You know what?
00:26:30I'm actually glad you asked that, so...
00:26:32Hey, you know what?
00:26:33The CEO of Maple Tech is coming to our little town next week.
00:26:38Janie could be the mayor's date.
00:26:40Oh, my God!
00:26:42Yes!
00:26:42Ma'am, I am determined to prove to you
00:26:46that I am the best man for Jane in this whole town.
00:26:49Hell, even in the whole state.
00:26:54And I'll prove it to you, okay?
00:26:58She can't breathe.
00:27:00It's an allergic reaction.
00:27:02What was in those...
00:27:03What were in those cookies?
00:27:06What were in those cookies?
00:27:10Were there peanuts in those cookies?
00:27:11She's allergic.
00:27:12Oh, my God!
00:27:13Craig, save him now!
00:27:15I got you, Grandma.
00:27:16Don't worry.
00:27:17Help is on the way!
00:27:18Get out there!
00:27:19You got to there.
00:27:20Don't you go buy it, okay?
00:27:21Hey, what the hell are you doing?
00:27:22She's having an allergic reaction.
00:27:24She needs an EpiPen.
00:27:25It's not fair.
00:27:31Craig!
00:27:32I thought you were going to refill it at the pharmacy.
00:27:34Eddie!
00:27:35Eddie, he distracted me!
00:27:36I distracted you?
00:27:38What?
00:27:38Just call an ambulance.
00:27:40Hey, Janie, is that so?
00:27:42Do you know that it's Christmas and the roads are closed?
00:27:44Oh, my God!
00:27:45She didn't...
00:27:46Hey!
00:27:47Hey, get the hell out of here, okay?
00:27:49I work for Eiffel Tech.
00:27:50They have a medical sector.
00:27:51You have no idea what you're doing.
00:27:53You don't know anything, Eddie!
00:27:55We need Dr. Lipschitz, but I can't reach him.
00:27:58Damn Christmas!
00:28:01Help me!
00:28:03Back off, you pathetic idiot!
00:28:06If you want to save your mother,
00:28:07stay out of my way and let me do my work.
00:28:09Just hold on, okay?
00:28:13My dying wish, Janie, to divorce that bum.
00:28:19Oh, okay.
00:28:20All right, 80s woman amaphylactic shock
00:28:22there's no EpiPen available.
00:28:24Have you known your fancy medical world?
00:28:26Okay, time is short.
00:28:27If you're not going to help,
00:28:28stay out of my way.
00:28:29I need vinegar and salt, okay?
00:28:31Please.
00:28:32I also need a conductive material,
00:28:34like gold, platinum, anything.
00:28:35Oh, you're shameless.
00:28:37He thinks we're just going to hand over
00:28:38all our valuables.
00:28:42That's got tens of thousands.
00:28:45Okay, perfect.
00:28:52Oh, no, no, no.
00:28:54I don't trust you.
00:28:56No.
00:28:56I am not letting my wife's grandmother die.
00:28:59Not on Christmas.
00:29:00You're killing her, you moron!
00:29:02You're screwed up, Eddie!
00:29:04Craig!
00:29:13Enough, Craig.
00:29:14You're the one who almost killed me
00:29:16by giving me peanuts
00:29:17and forgetting my medicine.
00:29:19Craig!
00:29:21Oh.
00:29:23I must have misjudged you.
00:29:26You saved my life, grandson.
00:29:30What?
00:29:35Eddie, you saved Christmas.
00:29:38Yes, he did.
00:29:44How did Eddie know how to save her?
00:29:46And what about the expensive watch?
00:29:48And you're supposed to be broken and jobless.
00:29:52Melinda said...
00:29:53I just assumed.
00:29:56Well, you know what they say
00:29:57about assuming father-in-law.
00:29:59All right, all right.
00:30:01So Eddie got lucky.
00:30:02Show's over.
00:30:03He's still a deadbeat.
00:30:05Let's do gifts!
00:30:06Yes!
00:30:08Yes!
00:30:09Let's do it!
00:30:10Yes, baby!
00:30:11For you, dear mama,
00:30:13Gucci sunglasses
00:30:14so you can look stylish.
00:30:17Oh, daddy-in-law!
00:30:20Oh!
00:30:21I got you a small batch bourbon!
00:30:24Oh, thank you.
00:30:26Thank you, sweetie.
00:30:27Thank you!
00:30:28And for you, dear.
00:30:31Pearl earrings for our girl of a grandmother.
00:30:37We did that!
00:30:38Don't choke on him!
00:30:40All right!
00:30:41Last and certainly least.
00:30:44Edward, for you.
00:30:46All right.
00:30:48Nothing!
00:30:49What?
00:30:58Unbelievable!
00:30:59Frank, Christina, you're so generous.
00:31:03Oh, sweet kids.
00:31:05Sweet indeed.
00:31:06Oh, but these must have been so expensive.
00:31:12Oh, yeah, like a hundred at Ross.
00:31:13Oh, yes.
00:31:15What a successful grandson I have.
00:31:17Oh, man.
00:31:21What's going on over there, Mr. Frowny Face?
00:31:24You didn't bring any Christmas gifts for us
00:31:26for our wonderful host, our grandmother?
00:31:28He's too selfish and too poor.
00:31:31I'm no Grinch.
00:31:32Of course I got everyone gifts.
00:31:34And you might find that they're got a little bit more of a personal touch than Crave.
00:31:39It's okay, Eddie.
00:31:45You don't have to give me a gift.
00:31:47I know you're poor.
00:31:49Well, how about we try anyway, man?
00:31:51Let's see.
00:31:52What do we have?
00:31:54Ah!
00:31:55For you?
00:31:57Melinda?
00:32:02Oh!
00:32:03I told you!
00:32:05Oh, well, it's a shawl, handmade from your favorite...
00:32:10It doesn't even work as a giant blanket.
00:32:12Ridiculous.
00:32:13Fuck!
00:32:15Nice gift.
00:32:18Oh, uh, Mr. Reynolds, I know you suffer from insomnia,
00:32:21so I got you some special ancient tea.
00:32:25That was harvested by the monks that...
00:32:28Tea?
00:32:29I can get this anywhere.
00:32:32I guess it's the thought that counts.
00:32:35Good job, tea bag.
00:32:38What about me, Eddie?
00:32:40You wanted to impress our grandmother on Christmas,
00:32:43and you didn't even bring her a gift?
00:32:45And my own house, too.
00:32:47Yeah.
00:32:48Grinch!
00:32:50I could never forget about you, man.
00:32:53I got you a gift.
00:32:55Have a look.
00:32:55Okay, I'll shoo him away.
00:33:06Out, ladies.
00:33:06The first Noel
00:33:10the angels did say
00:33:15was to certain poor shepherds
00:33:20in fields as they lay...
00:33:24All right, all right.
00:33:25Enough of this horse shit, all right?
00:33:27This is the worst gift ever.
00:33:28Where'd you get this Christmas carol?
00:33:30Dime store?
00:33:31In fields where they
00:33:36lay keeping their feet...
00:33:39Wait!
00:33:40Wait!
00:33:43That was my favorite song
00:33:46as a child in Europe.
00:33:48Oh, my!
00:33:50Noel, Noel
00:33:55Noel, Noel
00:33:59Born is the King
00:34:04of Israel
00:34:07Wow, wow.
00:34:17Some gift.
00:34:18That was the best gift.
00:34:25What a wonderful man you are, Eddie.
00:34:33Ding dong!
00:34:36I wanted to come by
00:34:37and wish my favorite matriarch
00:34:40a Merry Christmas
00:34:41and give her these
00:34:43wine that costs more
00:34:46than Eddie makes in a year.
00:34:48Of course.
00:34:52And
00:34:53my favorite peanut girl.
00:34:56Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa.
00:34:57She's allergic to peanut, Jared.
00:34:58Oh, um, I...
00:35:00The wine.
00:35:02Any upset you fine people again?
00:35:04Well, he did get
00:35:05Mom a nice gift
00:35:07but it's nothing
00:35:08compared to your generosity, Jared.
00:35:11Look, he gave me this filthy rag
00:35:14for the dog bed.
00:35:15Melinda,
00:35:15I know this weave.
00:35:18You put it in the dog bed?
00:35:21Uh-huh.
00:35:21This is fine, expensive,
00:35:23Turkish silk.
00:35:25I appreciate the thought
00:35:28but he just gave me
00:35:29plain old tea.
00:35:31Oh, plain tea?
00:35:32No, that was made by monks.
00:35:35It's a cure for the insomnia
00:35:37that you have.
00:35:38Oh.
00:35:39By golly.
00:35:40Oh.
00:35:41Eddie's gifts
00:35:42aren't inexpensive
00:35:43and thoughtless.
00:35:45They're personal
00:35:46and sentimental
00:35:47and valuable.
00:35:49I don't understand.
00:35:51Oh, yeah, well, I do.
00:35:53He stole them.
00:35:54I don't like being called a thief
00:35:56and that's the second time now.
00:35:58Yeah, and I don't like being robbed.
00:35:59All of these gifts
00:36:00are made by Maple Tech partners
00:36:02and subsidiaries.
00:36:04I would know that
00:36:05because I work there.
00:36:07Unlike you.
00:36:08You stole them.
00:36:10You thief.
00:36:12I knew it
00:36:13and he stole these gifts.
00:36:19I knew it.
00:36:22Eddie stole these gifts.
00:36:24I'm going to call the cops.
00:36:26Oh, I'm so disappointed, Eddie.
00:36:28I didn't steal anything, ma'am.
00:36:31Okay, you have my word.
00:36:32On my honor.
00:36:33Of course you stole them.
00:36:35You're poor.
00:36:37You expect us to believe
00:36:39that you spent thousands
00:36:40on these gifts?
00:36:42Eddie,
00:36:43how did you afford all of that?
00:36:45I'm your wife.
00:36:46I wouldn't know
00:36:46if you had that kind of money.
00:36:47And don't touch her, you thief.
00:36:49Yeah,
00:36:50we caught us a thief.
00:36:52It's what he deserves.
00:36:54Okay, that is enough.
00:36:55I am not a thief.
00:36:57I bought all of this stuff
00:36:58with my own money
00:36:59and you know what?
00:37:01I'll prove it.
00:37:04I swore to you, Grandma.
00:37:06That is the email
00:37:07I sent the carolers
00:37:08with my own personal credit card.
00:37:10This
00:37:11is the Turkish customs
00:37:13and invoice
00:37:14for the shawl
00:37:15and this
00:37:15is a photo of me
00:37:17with the monk
00:37:17who harvested your tea.
00:37:19Eddie, I...
00:37:22I don't understand.
00:37:25How did you get
00:37:26all of that?
00:37:27Eddie Andrews!
00:37:29You're under arrest
00:37:30or gun larceny.
00:37:31No, no.
00:37:32This is a misunderstanding.
00:37:35Hey, you're making
00:37:35a mistake here.
00:37:40Okay,
00:37:41this is a mistake.
00:37:42This is what you deserve, Eddie.
00:37:46Please, officers.
00:37:46He did nothing, okay?
00:37:48He is supposed to spend
00:37:49the day with his daughter.
00:37:50She can visit him in his cell.
00:37:52It's okay, Jane.
00:37:53I'll be out within the hour
00:37:54but tell Sasha not to worry.
00:37:55I will not
00:37:56miss a Christmas with her.
00:37:57Ah!
00:37:57Merry Christmas, Janey.
00:38:04Thank you, Stuart.
00:38:11You're gonna spend Christmas
00:38:13in a cage
00:38:13just like the animal you are.
00:38:15You know,
00:38:15I know my rights.
00:38:16I want my phone call.
00:38:18Now.
00:38:18Mrs. Henderson?
00:38:27Yeah, I think
00:38:27my hidden identity
00:38:28might have worked too well.
00:38:30I've been wrongly arrested.
00:38:31I need you to come down
00:38:32to the police station
00:38:32and clear this up.
00:38:34Hey.
00:38:37What a Christmas miracle.
00:38:39This is a gift.
00:38:40My high school nemesis locked up.
00:38:42You were always destined
00:38:43for this, Eddie,
00:38:44because you're a loser
00:38:46and now your family
00:38:47can see that.
00:38:48I'll be out of here
00:38:49in a few minutes, Duncan.
00:38:51But I won't forget it
00:38:52and you will regret it.
00:38:53See, Sasha,
00:38:55your daddy is a bad man
00:38:58and bad men are punished.
00:39:00For God's sake,
00:39:01he did not steal
00:39:02those Christmas gifts.
00:39:03Daddy, what's happening?
00:39:05It's okay, little one.
00:39:07I'm the mayor
00:39:08and I'm gonna take care of you
00:39:10and your sweet mom
00:39:11from now on.
00:39:15Get your hands off my wife!
00:39:16Duncan, please.
00:39:18You can stop this.
00:39:20He didn't steal those gifts.
00:39:21Eddie, you're upsetting
00:39:22your daughter.
00:39:23Which I have a feeling
00:39:23it's not the first time.
00:39:26Daddy, but you promised
00:39:28to spend the day with me.
00:39:30Hey, princess.
00:39:31That's okay.
00:39:32I'm gonna be out of here
00:39:32in no time.
00:39:34I promise.
00:39:35You're gonna spend
00:39:36in the day
00:39:36in a cell.
00:39:38Lock him up.
00:39:39Okay, no, wait.
00:39:40Don't do this
00:39:40in front of my daughter.
00:39:42The law is the law, Eddie.
00:39:45This is no place
00:39:46for ladies like you.
00:39:46Let me escort you out.
00:39:48Stop.
00:39:49I love you both, okay?
00:39:50This is just a mistake.
00:39:51I'll see you soon.
00:39:52And Duncan,
00:39:53I'm gonna see you real soon.
00:39:55Come on.
00:39:58You stole from
00:39:59a Fortune 500 company?
00:40:02We're gonna lock you up
00:40:02in this cage
00:40:03through Christmas
00:40:04so you don't ruin
00:40:04the mayor's big welcome
00:40:05for the CEO
00:40:06you stole from.
00:40:07See, that's where you're wrong.
00:40:08You've already ruined
00:40:10the CEO's welcome.
00:40:12But lucky for you two,
00:40:13you still have a chance
00:40:14to make up for it.
00:40:17Ooh.
00:40:19You remember
00:40:20that phone call I had?
00:40:21Well, here she comes.
00:40:23Right on cue.
00:40:26Vice President Henderson,
00:40:28this man stole gifts
00:40:30from your company,
00:40:31Maple Tech,
00:40:31and we knew.
00:40:32You podunk pigs.
00:40:35The CEO can't steal
00:40:36from his own company.
00:40:40Release him!
00:40:42Now!
00:40:43But it's Eddie Andrews.
00:40:45He was a loser
00:40:45in high school.
00:40:46We thought he was
00:40:46too poor for those gifts.
00:40:47Oh, God.
00:40:48We scored a bad.
00:40:48I'm sorry, sir.
00:40:49Please.
00:40:49We didn't know.
00:40:50My family works
00:40:51from Maple Tech.
00:40:52Please don't buy them.
00:40:52Please.
00:40:53Thank you for the assist,
00:40:55Mrs. Henderson.
00:40:56I've got it from here.
00:40:57Oh, but, um,
00:40:58have our people
00:40:59investigate Mayor Cross.
00:41:00I've got a feeling
00:41:01he's dirty.
00:41:02Bring me the proof I need.
00:41:08Well, well, well.
00:41:10You son of a bitch, Eddie.
00:41:15Your bullshit
00:41:16and your lies
00:41:17have finally caught up to you.
00:41:19You're too poor
00:41:20to afford those gifts.
00:41:22You stole them,
00:41:24you bastard.
00:41:24No, but he's...
00:41:25I'm, uh, locked up.
00:41:27That's right.
00:41:29Let Jared talk.
00:41:30I want to hear
00:41:30what he has to say.
00:41:32You're powerless
00:41:32and you're poor, Eddie.
00:41:34I'm going to get you
00:41:35to confess to your crime.
00:41:37This is going to be fun.
00:41:39You unemployed bum.
00:41:45I don't know how you
00:41:46convinced Jane
00:41:47to marry you.
00:41:48Oh, but the tables
00:41:49have turned.
00:41:50I have been waiting
00:41:51for years
00:41:52to humiliate you
00:41:53and take your woman.
00:41:55Jared,
00:41:55maybe you should...
00:41:56He should keep talking.
00:41:58The more he talks,
00:41:59the more he'll regret.
00:42:00You're about to be
00:42:01in a world of trouble.
00:42:02Leave me, little piece of...
00:42:04Open this gate.
00:42:05Let me at him.
00:42:13I don't know how you knew
00:42:15that I was going to get demoted,
00:42:16but this is my chance
00:42:18to win my job back
00:42:20and expose you
00:42:21for the poor thief
00:42:23that you are.
00:42:25And I'm going to get you
00:42:26to confess your theft
00:42:27against Maple Tech.
00:42:29I'm going to love
00:42:30torturing you
00:42:31and I'm going to get
00:42:32my job back.
00:42:33Win-win, asshole!
00:42:38This is a win-win
00:42:39for me, asshole!
00:42:41What's so funny?
00:42:43Oh, I'm sorry.
00:42:44I'm just...
00:42:44I'm just imagining
00:42:45your dumb face
00:42:47when you realize
00:42:48just how much trouble
00:42:49you're in.
00:42:50You're not going to think
00:42:51it's funny
00:42:52when I'm electrocuting
00:42:53your nuts!
00:42:54Oh, stop!
00:42:56Oh, you're screwed, Ernie!
00:43:02Oh, you're going to regret
00:43:04what the CEO
00:43:06hears about it!
00:43:07But, Jared,
00:43:08I've already heard.
00:43:10What?
00:43:11What the hell?
00:43:12Oh!
00:43:13I told you
00:43:14you'd regret it.
00:43:15Ah!
00:43:16Jared,
00:43:17you're under arrest
00:43:18for attacking
00:43:19Maple Tech's CEO.
00:43:21Ah!
00:43:22What?
00:43:24Oh, the CEO!
00:43:25He's just a poor...
00:43:27Wait...
00:43:28You're the CEO?
00:43:30Now you're getting it.
00:43:32Ah!
00:43:33Ah!
00:43:36Oh, Jared.
00:43:39You're fired.
00:43:40No!
00:43:45Daddy!
00:43:46How did you get out?
00:43:49How did you get out?
00:43:51Well, I told you all.
00:43:52It was just a big
00:43:53misunderstanding.
00:43:55I was so scared.
00:43:57I just wanted to
00:43:58spend the day
00:43:58with you, Daddy.
00:43:59Aw, that's so sweet.
00:44:01Well, if you remember,
00:44:03I promised
00:44:03to spend the day
00:44:04with you.
00:44:05And I keep my promises.
00:44:07Always.
00:44:09Daddy,
00:44:09I wish you could make
00:44:10my big Christmas wish
00:44:11come true.
00:44:12Oh, yeah?
00:44:12Cousin Robbie
00:44:16and all of my classmates
00:44:17have been going to the
00:44:19Create-A-Cat store
00:44:20in that big new mall,
00:44:21but...
00:44:22Create-A-Cat?
00:44:24Hmm.
00:44:24That's one of the stores
00:44:25in the new mall I own.
00:44:27Sasha, no.
00:44:28Remember we talked about that?
00:44:29That place is very expensive.
00:44:31Daddy and I,
00:44:32we can't afford that right now, okay?
00:44:35Tell you what,
00:44:35why don't you go on ahead?
00:44:36Because Sasha and I
00:44:37have a big old day planned,
00:44:40and she's going to come back
00:44:41with a big smile
00:44:42plastic on her face, aren't you?
00:44:43Ha ha.
00:44:46Oh, no, no, no.
00:44:48What?
00:44:49No, no, no.
00:44:49You don't need to do that.
00:44:51Seriously,
00:44:51we're going to be fine.
00:44:52All right,
00:44:56come on, princess,
00:44:57because I have a surprise
00:44:59for the best daughter
00:45:00in the world.
00:45:01Let's go.
00:45:10Daddy,
00:45:11where are we going?
00:45:20You're taking me
00:45:21to create a cat?
00:45:22I thought we couldn't afford it.
00:45:25Oh, hey,
00:45:26don't worry about that, princess, okay?
00:45:28Your daughter's right.
00:45:29That cat costs $500
00:45:31to customize.
00:45:32Why don't you try
00:45:33the Goodwill down the street?
00:45:34Ha ha.
00:45:35Thanks,
00:45:36but we're exactly
00:45:37where we need to be.
00:45:38This store is reserved
00:45:39for VIPs.
00:45:41I tried to warn you.
00:45:43Benji!
00:45:46He wants to come in,
00:45:47but he doesn't have
00:45:48a reservation.
00:45:49Don't you know
00:45:49who this man is?
00:45:50This is Eddie Andrews,
00:45:51the most pathetic man
00:45:54this town has ever seen.
00:45:56Good,
00:45:56don't let him in.
00:45:59Well, you know,
00:46:00it's been a long time,
00:46:01Benji,
00:46:02and now you're this, uh,
00:46:03big store manager.
00:46:04Congrats.
00:46:05But that still doesn't give you
00:46:06the right to speak unkindly
00:46:07in front of my daughter.
00:46:08Well, I see you're still
00:46:09a hopeless rule.
00:46:11Hey, kiddo,
00:46:12here's a lesson on capitalism.
00:46:14This is an expensive store.
00:46:15Your daddy can't afford it,
00:46:17so you don't get to come in.
00:46:18Hey,
00:46:19learn some respect,
00:46:21okay?
00:46:23Hey,
00:46:24look,
00:46:25don't listen to that guy,
00:46:26okay, princess?
00:46:26You do belong here,
00:46:28and you will create a cat.
00:46:30In fact,
00:46:31you can create as many cats
00:46:32as your little heart desires.
00:46:34Sir,
00:46:35should I call security?
00:46:36No,
00:46:36no need,
00:46:37I'll handle this.
00:46:38Back in the day,
00:46:39me and the guys
00:46:39used to toss this fool around
00:46:41like Play-Doh.
00:46:42Oh,
00:46:42speak of the devil.
00:46:43Benji,
00:46:44my man,
00:46:45just stopped by
00:46:46to get Jane's nephew
00:46:48and her bastard child
00:46:49some Christmas gifts.
00:46:53And what are the odds?
00:46:55Don't worry, Eddie,
00:46:56I'll get your little daughter here
00:46:58to create a cat
00:47:00since you can't afford it.
00:47:01Do you need it,
00:47:02Mr. Mayor?
00:47:03Absolutely, darling.
00:47:12Uncle Duncan
00:47:12is going to take care of you.
00:47:15You just need to ask
00:47:16your dad to leave now,
00:47:17okay?
00:47:20You just have to ask
00:47:22your daddy to leave now.
00:47:23I want one,
00:47:24but he's my dad.
00:47:27I'm not paying for a create-a-cat
00:47:29until he gets thrown out.
00:47:31With pleasure.
00:47:32Okay.
00:47:32No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
00:47:34Okay,
00:47:34you do not have the right
00:47:35to kick me out.
00:47:36I belong here.
00:47:37You don't know the first thing
00:47:38about a high-class place like this.
00:47:40Really?
00:47:40Well,
00:47:41let's see,
00:47:42it's 1,300 square feet.
00:47:44You pay a prorated rent
00:47:45of about $3,500
00:47:46to Maple Tech
00:47:48and I believe you're expecting
00:47:49about $55,000
00:47:50in your fourth quarter.
00:47:52Shall I continue?
00:47:52How the hell?
00:47:53That's confidential information.
00:47:54Who cares?
00:47:55He's dead weight.
00:47:56I am the mayor
00:47:57and I want him thrown out.
00:47:59See, Duncan,
00:48:00you've actually got it backwards.
00:48:01You're the one
00:48:02who's not welcome here.
00:48:03I reserved this whole store today.
00:48:05Oh,
00:48:05your lies are really
00:48:06something else.
00:48:07This store is reserved,
00:48:09but not for you.
00:48:10Now,
00:48:10get out before
00:48:11our VIP-paying customers
00:48:13get here.
00:48:13How about you
00:48:14double-check your system?
00:48:15Look for the name
00:48:16Eddie Andrews.
00:48:20Oh,
00:48:20yes, sir.
00:48:27Eddie,
00:48:28how the hell
00:48:28did you manage
00:48:29to reserve this entire store?
00:48:30That requires
00:48:31a massive deposit.
00:48:32Yeah, see,
00:48:33I rented this store
00:48:34for the day
00:48:35so I could have
00:48:35a private day
00:48:36with my daughter.
00:48:37No one else
00:48:38is allowed in
00:48:38and especially
00:48:39the mayor
00:48:40this is a joke.
00:48:45I'm sorry,
00:48:46Duncan,
00:48:46I'll make it up to you,
00:48:47but if you don't leave,
00:48:48I'll be in trouble
00:48:48with corporate.
00:48:55This isn't over yet,
00:48:57Ed.
00:48:59Not by a long shot.
00:49:06Daddy,
00:49:07you reserved
00:49:08the whole store
00:49:09just for me?
00:49:11I sure did,
00:49:12princess.
00:49:12Come on,
00:49:13let's have some fun,
00:49:14huh?
00:49:14Hey, not so fast.
00:49:16Eddie,
00:49:16I don't know
00:49:16how the hell
00:49:16you reserved
00:49:17this entire store,
00:49:18but I know you
00:49:19would have broke
00:49:20POS you are.
00:49:21You must have
00:49:21conned us
00:49:22or hacked the system
00:49:23somehow or...
00:49:24Hey!
00:49:24Don't take things
00:49:25that you can't afford,
00:49:26kid.
00:49:26And while I talk
00:49:27to your loser daddy,
00:49:28don't touch anything
00:49:29with your grubby
00:49:29little hands, okay?
00:49:30You're gonna regret
00:49:31talking to my daughter
00:49:32that way.
00:49:32Yeah, well,
00:49:33she'll be traumatizing
00:49:34her daddy
00:49:34thrown out by security.
00:49:36Security,
00:49:36we have a trespasser
00:49:37in Create-A-Cat.
00:49:38Please come.
00:49:39You know,
00:49:39I was gonna let this slide,
00:49:41call it a
00:49:42innocent misunderstanding,
00:49:43but now you've
00:49:44gone too far.
00:49:46Get your resumes ready.
00:49:49Let's go,
00:49:50asshole.
00:49:51Out!
00:49:51No, please,
00:49:52that's my daddy.
00:49:54No, please,
00:49:55that's my daddy.
00:49:57Yeah, well,
00:49:57your daddy
00:49:57brought this one himself.
00:49:59Is this how you
00:49:59treat customers, huh?
00:50:01And a little girl
00:50:02at Christmas time?
00:50:03You're never gonna
00:50:03work in this town again.
00:50:04This is how I treat
00:50:05losers and liars
00:50:06with no money.
00:50:07Get him out of here.
00:50:08You don't want to do this.
00:50:10I get paid to do this.
00:50:11What is all this
00:50:12work is about?
00:50:14Oh, my God,
00:50:14Mr. A.
00:50:15Mr. A,
00:50:16his name is Eddie,
00:50:17and don't worry, ma'am,
00:50:18we are kicking out
00:50:19this lying, broke loser.
00:50:22What are you doing?
00:50:24Did you morons
00:50:26drink too much eggnog?
00:50:27This is the owner
00:50:28of the entire mall.
00:50:29I was following
00:50:39Benji's orders.
00:50:40This must be
00:50:41some kind of joke, right?
00:50:42Oh, I know what it is.
00:50:43This is one of those
00:50:44Christmas prank shows, right?
00:50:45Where are the cameras?
00:50:47No joke.
00:50:49No, no one's laughing.
00:50:50Just like no one was laughing
00:50:51when you were saying
00:50:51awful things to my daughter.
00:50:54Fire this man now.
00:50:56Benji, you're done.
00:50:57Get out.
00:50:59What?
00:51:00Eddie, Eddie.
00:51:01Mr. A?
00:51:03No.
00:51:04No!
00:51:05No, Eddie!
00:51:07Sir, what about her?
00:51:12Well, if she changes
00:51:13her attitude
00:51:14and gives you
00:51:16the best day
00:51:17you've ever had,
00:51:18maybe you can
00:51:19keep your job.
00:51:20Yes, sir.
00:51:23This is all
00:51:25for you, sweetie.
00:51:25Dad, do you own
00:51:31this mall?
00:51:32Mm-hmm.
00:51:33Does that mean
00:51:33you own Maple Tech?
00:51:34Mm-hmm.
00:51:35I do.
00:51:36Merry Christmas, sweetheart.
00:51:38But it's a secret.
00:51:40So can you keep it
00:51:42between us
00:51:42until I tell Mommy?
00:51:44Okay.
00:51:45You're the best dad ever.
00:51:46This is the most
00:51:47awesome day ever.
00:51:49It is, isn't it?
00:51:50Go have fun.
00:51:51Okay.
00:51:51We've got four hours,
00:51:59princess.
00:52:00So until then,
00:52:01the store's yours.
00:52:0810 minutes early
00:52:09for dinner.
00:52:09Tonight, I tell Jane
00:52:11I'm the CEO of...
00:52:12You're 50 minutes late.
00:52:19I thought Craig said
00:52:208 o'clock.
00:52:21Hey, don't blame
00:52:22your BS on me,
00:52:23deadbeat.
00:52:24Is anything ever
00:52:25your fault, Eddie?
00:52:26You know what?
00:52:27I'm sorry.
00:52:28I must have lost
00:52:29track of time
00:52:29when I was spending
00:52:30quality time
00:52:31with my daughter.
00:52:32For sure.
00:52:33That's fine,
00:52:34but we had to order
00:52:35without you.
00:52:36Hey, last one here
00:52:37gets a broken chair.
00:52:38Don't worry,
00:52:40we saved you some.
00:52:43Hey, a toast
00:52:44to me,
00:52:46Maple Tech's
00:52:47employee of the month.
00:52:51Dinner's on me.
00:52:53Yeah, you know what?
00:52:54I am a big success
00:52:56at Maple Tech.
00:52:57Unlike Eddie.
00:52:58Hey, get a job,
00:52:59you bum.
00:53:03Your brother-in-law
00:53:05is giving you trouble, sir?
00:53:06You know he is
00:53:08your employee.
00:53:09But he doesn't
00:53:09know that.
00:53:11Yet.
00:53:12Did you get me
00:53:12his internal file?
00:53:18Yeah, Maple Tech
00:53:20is lucky to have me.
00:53:21I'm the best they got.
00:53:22Oh, my.
00:53:23Really?
00:53:24Why don't you talk
00:53:24more about how
00:53:25you're so great
00:53:26and such a model employee?
00:53:27Yes, you know what?
00:53:36You don't get it
00:53:37because you don't
00:53:38got a real job.
00:53:40But me?
00:53:41I am not just
00:53:42a model employee.
00:53:43I'm the best they got.
00:53:46Bravo.
00:53:47So successful.
00:53:48Yeah, you know,
00:53:48I'll probably be running
00:53:49that place soon enough.
00:53:51Hey, but don't worry, Eddie.
00:53:52I'll get you hired on
00:53:53as an assistant
00:53:54in the mail room.
00:53:55Oh, come on, Craig.
00:53:59It's Christmas.
00:54:00What's the matter, Janie?
00:54:01You jealous that
00:54:02my husband has
00:54:03a real job?
00:54:04Stop it, ladies.
00:54:06Eddie got me
00:54:07a thoughtful Christmas gift
00:54:08and I'm very thankful.
00:54:09But, Craig,
00:54:10he's treating us
00:54:11to dinner,
00:54:11so let's raise
00:54:12a glass to him.
00:54:14To our son,
00:54:16successful son,
00:54:18Craig,
00:54:20thanks for Christmas dinner.
00:54:22Cheers.
00:54:24Though I'm sorry.
00:54:24Great.
00:54:25So you're getting
00:54:26promoted.
00:54:27I'm just,
00:54:28I'm getting confused.
00:54:29Why am I using
00:54:30too many big words
00:54:31for you
00:54:31because you're an idiot?
00:54:32Well,
00:54:32maybe I am thick.
00:54:34Too thick even
00:54:35to understand
00:54:36the big words
00:54:37here in your
00:54:37performance review
00:54:38at Maple Tech.
00:54:40Let's see,
00:54:40words like
00:54:41substandard,
00:54:42inefficient,
00:54:43ooh,
00:54:44negative attitude.
00:54:45Oh, right here.
00:54:46Turn in work late.
00:54:47You're inconsistent.
00:54:49Your work
00:54:50is just awful
00:54:52and that they
00:54:52recommend
00:54:53immediate termination.
00:54:54You liar.
00:54:56How dare you?
00:54:57That is a secret
00:54:59internal Maple Tech document.
00:55:01How'd you get
00:55:02your grubby little hands
00:55:03on it?
00:55:03How?
00:55:05That is a secret
00:55:07internal Maple Tech document.
00:55:10How'd you get
00:55:10your grubby little hands
00:55:11on it?
00:55:11How?
00:55:12Craig,
00:55:13oh lord.
00:55:14I thought you were
00:55:14a model employee.
00:55:16No, no,
00:55:16my supervisor,
00:55:17he's out to get me.
00:55:19The real issue here
00:55:20is Eddie
00:55:21stealing files.
00:55:22What, Craig,
00:55:23you lied to me
00:55:23about being in line
00:55:24for a promotion
00:55:25at work?
00:55:26Eddie,
00:55:27first you get
00:55:27Jared demoted
00:55:28and now you have
00:55:29access to
00:55:30internal Maple Tech files?
00:55:32What's going on?
00:55:34Who are you really?
00:55:37Watch this.
00:55:39Everybody,
00:55:40if I could
00:55:40have your attention,
00:55:41please,
00:55:41just for one second.
00:55:42Maple Tech coming to town
00:55:43wasn't actually
00:55:44a coincidence.
00:55:46I happen to be
00:55:47the C.E.
00:55:48Oh,
00:55:49son of a whore!
00:55:50You know what?
00:55:50You're just trying
00:55:51to humiliate me
00:55:52in front of my
00:55:52whole family!
00:55:53Okay, Craig.
00:55:54That's enough now.
00:55:56Jobless deputy!
00:55:59She's coming!
00:56:07I can't breathe!
00:56:10Whoa, whoa, whoa!
00:56:11Don't do mouth-to-mouth
00:56:12on someone who's choking!
00:56:13Shut up, loser!
00:56:14Eddie, you're full of surprises.
00:56:15Is there something you can do to help save her?
00:56:19Eddie, you're full of surprises.
00:56:20Is there something you can do to help her?
00:56:23I'm not!
00:56:25Get the hell out of here!
00:56:26She's a goddamn pod anyway!
00:56:28You're the one who hit your wife.
00:56:29That's why she's joking.
00:56:30Let Eddie help her.
00:56:31Yeah, I'm not letting it come in anywhere near my woman, okay?
00:56:35I work for Maple Tech, okay?
00:56:37I have a medical sector.
00:56:39I got this!
00:56:40Enough, Frank.
00:56:41You can too much to drink.
00:56:42Get out of here.
00:56:42No, I got you!
00:56:44Yes!
00:56:46He's molesting my wife!
00:56:47You pervert!
00:56:48Get down, Craig!
00:56:52Oh, my God.
00:56:53I can breathe!
00:56:55Okay.
00:56:56You all right?
00:56:57You all right?
00:56:58Just big breaths.
00:56:59In, out.
00:57:00In, out.
00:57:02There we go.
00:57:02Oh, my hero!
00:57:04Oh, I never realized how handsome you are.
00:57:08Okay.
00:57:10He saved Christina's life.
00:57:12It's a Christmas miracle!
00:57:13It's a Christmas miracle!
00:57:15Miracle?
00:57:16It's more like an accident.
00:57:18No.
00:57:19Actually, it's not an accident.
00:57:20Maple Tech has a huge medical sector.
00:57:23You know what?
00:57:23My brother-in-law is not connected to Maple Tech.
00:57:27I am.
00:57:28I work there.
00:57:29He doesn't.
00:57:30He is a zero.
00:57:32I'm a goddamn hero.
00:57:33Oh, stop it, Craig.
00:57:34I'm tired of you talking about my husband that way.
00:57:36Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:57:38You know what?
00:57:38I work for Maple Tech, okay?
00:57:41Eddie is a loser.
00:57:43An unemployed, deadbeat dad.
00:57:48It's finally time to reveal my identity to them all.
00:57:52Look, not to steal your thunder, hotshot, but this Christmas, I wanted to tell you guys something.
00:57:58And that thing-
00:57:59Dammit, you know what's wrong with Christmas?
00:58:01Where's my drink?
00:58:03We need champagne!
00:58:04Okay, look, I think maybe you've had enough to drink, right?
00:58:06No.
00:58:07He's right, Craig.
00:58:08Hey, waitress!
00:58:09Oh, God.
00:58:10Oh, champagne for everyone.
00:58:12On me.
00:58:14Now!
00:58:14Do you know how expensive these bottles are?
00:58:17I'm not trying to embarrass you, but I don't think you can afford to-
00:58:19Hey, hey, look, I am successful, and you're not, okay?
00:58:24Champagne, the finest for everyone.
00:58:31Where- Where's my drink?
00:58:34Ah, here we go, about time.
00:58:37Our finest bottle, sir.
00:58:38Yeah.
00:58:39Would you like to see the price before-
00:58:40Nah, nah, nah, get the hell out of here.
00:58:43Ah!
00:58:43Merry Christmas from the best, most successful man in this family.
00:58:50It's so lovely, sir.
00:58:53Ah, you know what?
00:58:54On a second thought, your poverty-stricken palate is too pedestrian for this fine vintage.
00:59:00It'd be wasted on you.
00:59:06Ah, tasty.
00:59:08Don't be such a pig, Craig.
00:59:09Yeah, you might want to savor that, considering how much it costs per drop.
00:59:13Hey, I'm successful, and you're not, okay?
00:59:18I don't have to penny-pinch like you, okay?
00:59:22Waitress!
00:59:23Another bottle!
00:59:26Are you sure, sir?
00:59:28Perhaps a different, more modern vintage.
00:59:30Oh, perhaps maybe I'm in charge, and you're the help, okay?
00:59:35Bring me the best.
00:59:36Can you know who I work for?
00:59:37What if I say?
00:59:38Jesus Christ.
00:59:41Oh, wow.
00:59:41Well, so another $30,000 bottle of wine.
00:59:46$30,000?
00:59:49$30,000?
00:59:51Wait, Craig, that is our mortgage!
00:59:53We're going to have to get it to the room.
00:59:54Give me that.
00:59:55Put it in!
00:59:56Jesus.
00:59:56Oh, you always say that.
00:59:58Damn it, woman, you spilled it!
00:59:59That's $1,000 right there!
01:00:00You're in the hole!
01:00:01You ruined Christmas!
01:00:02It's a bankrupt, Craig.
01:00:03Oh, no!
01:00:04No!
01:00:04Oh, it's too expensive!
01:00:08You break it, you buy it!
01:00:09And you already drank one bottle!
01:00:12Are you saying you can't pay?
01:00:13What are we going to do?
01:00:16Fuck.
01:00:17Thank God Craig didn't give us any champagne.
01:00:20It was Eddie!
01:00:21He goaded me into it!
01:00:23He's the...
01:00:23It's all right, it's all right.
01:00:25Everybody, don't worry.
01:00:26Dinner's on me tonight.
01:00:27Just put the bottles on my tab, okay?
01:00:29Eddie, what?
01:00:30We can't record it.
01:00:31Just put it on this, my black card.
01:00:35Just put it on my black card.
01:00:40Eddie, no!
01:00:42What?
01:00:44Sir, I've never seen a card like this before.
01:00:47Is this even real?
01:00:47Of course it's not.
01:00:49Yeah, come on.
01:00:50You know, we all know you can't even afford to get a reservation here.
01:00:53Sit down and stop lying!
01:00:54Just because you don't know what it is doesn't mean it's fake.
01:00:58It's real.
01:00:58Just charge the bill to it.
01:01:01It says card unidentified.
01:01:05The client, you lying sack of shit!
01:01:08Oh, Eddie, what is wrong with you?
01:01:10Were you dropping it in your head as a baby?
01:01:12Eddie, why are you trying to pretend to be rich?
01:01:17Um, someone just swiped a Maple Tech VIP Alpha card.
01:01:22What do I care if somebody swipes a card at some swanky New York club or...
01:01:26It was swiped here.
01:01:28Downstairs.
01:01:29A patron?
01:01:30A patron with one of only three VIP cards in the world?
01:01:33In our hotel.
01:01:35I better go greet him before it's too late.
01:01:37Eddie, please.
01:01:39You are embarrassing me.
01:01:41You can't afford your bill and there aren't enough dishes on this planet to pay it off.
01:01:44That's what you get for ordering things you can't afford.
01:01:51You are the one who spent $60,000 on champagne.
01:01:55Okay, why does my husband have to take the hit for that?
01:01:58He offered, okay?
01:02:00It's his problem now.
01:02:01Ed, is it?
01:02:02I'm sorry, but I'm going to have to call the police.
01:02:05Okay, let's just slow down, all right?
01:02:07With all due respect, this card's tech hasn't arrived in this town just yet.
01:02:11You can't swipe an electronic chip.
01:02:15You are making it really hard to stick by your side.
01:02:20What's going to happen to our daughter if you end up in jail?
01:02:23What's going to happen?
01:02:24That's not going to happen.
01:02:26I'm not going to go to jail.
01:02:27What are you talking about?
01:02:28Why are you pretending to have money?
01:02:30I don't care about that.
01:02:31I care about you lying, though.
01:02:33I know, but that's right.
01:02:35Oh, sir, I was just going to call you.
01:02:38He ordered two $30,000 bottles of champagne and then tried to steal them by using this fake
01:02:42toy credit card.
01:02:44And what did you say to the man who gave you this black card?
01:02:47I said I'll have to call the police.
01:02:50Do you have any idea what you've done?
01:02:52You're fired.
01:02:54What?
01:02:55I was just doing my job.
01:02:57Look, the dumb card he gave me is fake.
01:02:59Please just tell him that it was a mistake.
01:03:01It's fine.
01:03:02This card is not a toy.
01:03:04And it's not made of plastic.
01:03:05It's a titanium composite with gold-plated sensors.
01:03:09Huh, but it was declined.
01:03:11Yeah, I swiped it.
01:03:12It declined.
01:03:13And, Joy, you're going to pay off every drop for the rest of your stupid, pathetic life.
01:03:20You can't swipe an encrypted card.
01:03:22$60,000 payment accepted.
01:03:29There it is.
01:03:32I'm so sorry, sir.
01:03:34Please.
01:03:35Oh, gosh.
01:03:35Really, there's no need.
01:03:38She didn't know about the card.
01:03:39And after all, it's Christmas.
01:03:41Please don't fire her on my account.
01:03:42Thank you, sir.
01:03:46Sir, it is an honor to have an elite VIP black card alpha holder here.
01:03:51VIP?
01:03:53Black card alpha?
01:03:54Please.
01:03:55Accept a free night in our presidential suite, sir.
01:03:58What the hell's going on here?
01:04:00Who's Eddie anyway?
01:04:02That might be really nice to have a night alone together.
01:04:05Eddie, really, what is going on?
01:04:08How do you have this kind of power?
01:04:10Who are you?
01:04:11I've been wanting to tell you for a long time.
01:04:15I'll tell you tonight when we're alone in our suite, okay?
01:04:19Well, thank you, everybody, for a very memorable meal.
01:04:25But Jane and I are going to call it a night, so good night.
01:04:29Serials.
01:04:32Drink some water.
01:04:33Yeah, for sure.
01:04:44This is for us, and it's free.
01:04:47Why?
01:04:49The presidential suite is the least we can offer, Mr. Andrews.
01:04:52Good evening.
01:04:57Wow, Mr. Andrews.
01:05:02What did a girl like me do to deserve a suite like this?
01:05:06You stood by me when no one else wanted you to.
01:05:10And now I'm going to tell you.
01:05:11Baby, you know how long it's been since we've been alone together, just the two of us.
01:05:16And in a suite like this?
01:05:20Don't get me wrong.
01:05:21I love where this is going.
01:05:22But first...
01:05:23First, actually, I want to show you something.
01:05:28So, just give me a minute.
01:05:30Mr. Andrews.
01:05:31How will she react when I tell her I'm not an unemployed deadbeat?
01:05:40I'm a Fortune 500 CEO.
01:05:42I did it for her and our daughter.
01:05:44But I'm worried.
01:05:45I'm a Fortune 500 CEO.
01:05:47I'm a Fortune 500 CEO.
01:05:47I'm a Fortune 500 CEO.
01:05:48I'm a Fortune 500 CEO.
01:05:50Wow.
01:05:50Merry Christmas, Mr. President.
01:05:52Merry Christmas, Mr. President.
01:05:54Merry Christmas, baby.
01:06:04Merry Christmas, Mr. President.
01:06:07Is she being funny or does she know I'm a corporate president and CEO?
01:06:11Either way, I am into it.
01:06:13It's a presidential suite.
01:06:16So that makes you the president.
01:06:19It's just you and me alone.
01:06:21I have been waiting for this for a long time.
01:06:24You don't say.
01:06:26And what have you been waiting to do with me?
01:06:35Oh, Eddie, I can't believe this notion of suite.
01:06:40It's like a fantasy.
01:06:42Get used to it.
01:06:44I'm going to make all your fantasies come true.
01:06:54You're my fantasy.
01:06:58I don't care about jobs or money.
01:07:02I only care about you.
01:07:04Only you.
01:07:05Only you.
01:07:23Oh!
01:07:25False crisis?
01:07:27You have no idea.
01:07:28You have no idea.
01:07:43Who's there?
01:07:44You're looking good, Shaney.
01:07:45You're blocking my view, fella.
01:07:46Duncan, how did you get up here?
01:07:47I'm the mayor.
01:07:48I can go anywhere I want.
01:07:50And I know where I want to go now.
01:07:51Duncan, get out of here.
01:07:52What's the matter, darling?
01:07:53It's not like I haven't seen a sexy body like yours before, doll.
01:07:58Get out of here.
01:07:59Or else what?
01:08:00Everyone in this town answers to me, even the Maple Tech CEO.
01:08:01You're a nobody.
01:08:02Not everyone in this town.
01:08:03I'm the mayor.
01:08:04I can go anywhere I want.
01:08:05And I know where I want to go now.
01:08:07Duncan, get out of here.
01:08:09What's the matter, darling?
01:08:10It's not like I haven't seen a sexy body like yours before, doll.
01:08:14Get out of here.
01:08:15Or else.
01:08:17Or else what?
01:08:19Everyone in this town answers to me, even the Maple Tech CEO.
01:08:25You're a nobody.
01:08:26Nobody.
01:08:27Not everyone answers to you, and especially not the CEO.
01:08:31Get out.
01:08:33You can't do a goddamn thing to kick me out of this room.
01:08:38$99 bottle of vodka.
01:08:43Good luck paying for that.
01:08:44Duncan, we didn't drink it.
01:08:46You can take that up with the hotel.
01:08:48Eddie, get him to stop.
01:08:49Our mini bar bill will be huge.
01:08:51There's still one more, Duncan.
01:08:56Good luck, you poor bastard paying for that $300 mini bar.
01:09:01Now, see, I won't have a problem paying the bill.
01:09:02But the hotel security, they will have a problem.
01:09:03I'm the goddamn mayor.
01:09:04They'll be too afraid to touch me.
01:09:05Good.
01:09:06The mess this prick did.
01:09:07Take him out of here.
01:09:11Good luck, you poor bastard paying for that $300 mini bar.
01:09:14Now, see, I won't have a problem paying the bill, but the hotel security, they will have a problem.
01:09:20I'm the goddamn mayor.
01:09:23They'll be too afraid to touch me.
01:09:26Good.
01:09:27the mess this prick did.
01:09:30Take him out of here.
01:09:37Sir,
01:09:38is this man bothering you?
01:09:40What are you calling him sir for?
01:09:45I am
01:09:46the goddamn mayor.
01:09:47You're gonna be sorry for this.
01:09:49I answer that people are more powerful
01:09:51than a small-time mayor.
01:09:54You will goddamn regret this.
01:09:56I regret to find Mr. Andrew
01:09:58is more. Mister?
01:10:00He's a loser. What are you
01:10:02talking about? He's a loser.
01:10:05He's a loser.
01:10:07Where were we?
01:10:09Eddie,
01:10:10how did you do that?
01:10:14The security guard treated you like
01:10:16you're more powerful than the mayor.
01:10:17Because I'm a Fortune 500 CEO.
01:10:21I've been wanting
01:10:22to tell you forever.
01:10:24Jane Sarah Reynolds,
01:10:25let's open this door.
01:10:27Mom?
01:10:29I'm sorry, sir.
01:10:30She ran right past me.
01:10:32It's all right.
01:10:33Melinda,
01:10:34what is it?
01:10:35I don't know how you convinced
01:10:36security to throw out her...
01:10:38Tonja называется...
01:10:48I don't go on.
01:10:48Let's go on.
01:10:50What are your supplements?
01:10:50It's all right.
01:10:51I don't know how you convinced
01:10:52the accomplishments that Luber
01:10:53are not allowed.
01:10:54You should write this down here
01:10:55through, Ziemi.
01:10:56It's all right.
01:10:56I'm sorry.
01:10:57I asked them,
01:10:58but I'm happy
01:10:58to say they're not allowed to do it.
01:11:00I was not allowed to have
01:11:01to plan anui erwant
01:11:01between college and university.
01:11:03Keep it up
01:11:04there news.
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