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Fun
Transcript
00:00I woke up one morning
00:01Then my son stood at the edge of the bed
00:04He was holding in his hand a pair of pants I had taken off that evening.
00:07And the features of confusion are drawn on his face
00:10I got up in a panic and said to him
00:11what are you doing baby
00:13Isn't it shameful to act like this?
00:16hesitate a little
00:16Then he answered in a low, confused voice:
00:19Sorry mom
00:21but i've seen my dad before
00:22He's getting closer to you in a way I don't understand.
00:25I wanted to know why he was doing that.
00:27His words struck a chord with your heart.
00:30I didn't know how to hug him out of fear
00:32Should I shout at him in shock at what I heard?
00:35The child was not guilty.
00:37He didn't realize what he was saying or doing.
00:39But he absorbed an image he should never have seen in the first place.
00:43I felt the ground shake beneath my feet.
00:45And a door of horror has opened in my house
00:47I sat next to him
00:49I'm trying to pull myself together
00:51I said to him gently, almost crying.
00:53My son, what do you see between me?
00:55Between you and your father, it is not a game or anything
00:58You should imitate him
00:59There are privacy issues between spouses that children do not understand.
01:02You should not see her or try to do the same.
01:05You have to trust your mom.
01:07I don't allow anyone to hurt me or touch me badly
01:10He looked at me with innocent eyes full of joy.
01:13Then he rushed into my arms as if he was looking for safety.
01:16At that moment I felt a terrible weight pressing on my chest.
01:21I realized that I was falling short
01:22And my life with my husband was not as straight as it should be
01:26And our neglect of the smallest details in the presence of children
01:29It's what made my son see
01:31What he should not see
01:32From that day everything changed
01:35I live in constant anxiety
01:36I monitor my son's behavior
01:38I avoid any moment where he might get confused again.
01:42But fear still haunted me.
01:44What if the scene was repeated?
01:46What if my son talked about what he saw in front of someone?
01:48What if I left?
01:49This spark grows in him.
01:52Until it becomes a fire that burns his innocence
01:54I decided to bring up the subject with my husband.
01:56In the evening I sat down with him and told him frankly
01:59Our son saw you approaching me one night.
02:02This had a bad effect on him.
02:04He even tried to imitate what he saw.
02:07My husband got angry at first and devoured me.
02:09exaggeratedly
02:10You made things worse in his head.
02:13Children forget quickly.
02:15But I insisted no
02:17The child does not forget easily
02:19What he saw might leave a serious impact on him.
02:21We are responsible for it before God before we are before people
02:25We should pay more attention
02:26And to preserve his innocence
02:28My husband was silent for a moment and then muttered,
02:31Maybe you're right
02:32I didn't expect it to come to this.
02:35Days passed and I carried inside me a worry that would not be extinguished
02:38I tried to keep my son busy playing and studying.
02:41And his closest friends, otherwise he will remain
02:44A prisoner of the thoughts that stuck in his mind
02:47But sometimes I saw him looking at me with strange looks.
02:50As if his little mind was trying to solve a mystery much bigger than him.
02:54I couldn't stay silent any longer
02:56I decided to visit
02:57Educational advisor at my son's school
03:01I told her what happened.
03:03But without shameful details
03:05She smiled tenderly and said
03:07Don't worry a lot of children
03:09They take pictures or
03:10Positions of adults
03:12Then they try to imitate it.
03:14The important thing now is to explain to him gently.
03:16There are red lines
03:18What he sees is not his
03:20It is also important to live in a safe home.
03:22He is devoid of these scenes in front of him
03:24Her words were like cold water on a burning heart.
03:28I left her and I made a promise to myself
03:30To fix what we have ruined
03:32And to set strict boundaries between the spouses' privacy
03:35And between children
03:36But it did not stop there
03:39In the following nights I noticed a change.
03:41In my husband's own behavior
03:43He became more nervous
03:44causing minor problems
03:46As if he was escaping his guilt by engaging in arguments.
03:50I knew there was a bigger secret behind it.
03:52But I preferred to be patient and watch before I confronted him with what I felt.
03:56And one night
03:58While silence prevailed in the house
04:00I heard faint whispers coming from the living room.
04:04I approached cautiously
04:05Then my husband was talking to someone on the phone in a low voice.
04:09Talking about meetings and mysterious things
04:12My heart trembled
04:13I felt that what threatened my home was not only what my child saw.
04:16But other, more dangerous things are coming.
04:18I didn't sleep that night
04:20I kept talking to myself
04:21Who was my husband talking to on the phone?
04:23What are these brief words that reveal a hidden secret?
04:27I tried to convince myself
04:28It's nothing more than a business conversation or an old friend.
04:32But my heart was not reassured
04:34My doubts were growing every time.
04:36I remembered his hesitation and nervousness in the last days.
04:39And his neglect of me and my daughter
04:41In the morning I sat with my son and looked at his homework.
04:44Then he asked me a question that confused me again.
04:47Mom, why doesn't Dad smile at me like before?
04:50Why did he get angry quickly?
04:52I did not find a satisfactory answer
04:54I just touched his head and said
04:56Your father loves you, son.
04:57But he is busy these days.
04:59But my words did not convince me myself.
05:02I felt like our house was cracking from the inside out.
05:05And I have to put an end to this ambiguity.
05:07A few days passed
05:09During this time, I became more aware of my husband.
05:11I've noticed that he goes out a lot.
05:14without telling me where he was going
05:16And he turns off his phone when he is with me
05:19I tried to open the subject with him calmly.
05:21But he was getting angry quickly.
05:23And he says
05:24Don't you trust me?
05:25Aren't we having enough problems between us?
05:27To increase the suspicion on top of it
05:29I kept quiet for fear that the conversation would turn into a fight.
05:33But the fire was burning in my chest
05:35One evening
05:37As he was preparing to leave
05:39I stood in front of him and said firmly,
05:41I won't let you leave before you tell me.
05:44Who spoke at night
05:45What are you hiding from me?
05:47He was confused and then said
05:48These are business matters.
05:50But his looks gave him away.
05:53His trembling voice
05:54His shaking hand as he tried to put on his jacket.
05:57All evidence that he is lying
05:59At that moment I realized
06:01To remain silent is a crime
06:03For myself, my home, and my son
06:05I let him out
06:06Then I decided to follow him the day.
06:09Next I will reveal the truth myself
06:11when the sun rose
06:12I pretended I was going to work.
06:15But I kept watching him from afar.
06:17I saw him meeting a woman at a nearby cafe.
06:20He talks to her with an intimacy I haven't seen from him in a long time.
06:23I was screaming with anger
06:25But I held on and went home.
06:28I'm thinking what to do
06:30Should I confront him with what I saw?
06:31Should I tell my family?
06:32Or should I be patient and accept it?
06:34I returned to my son
06:35I looked at his innocent face
06:37He is playing with cube pieces.
06:39I felt that my life was not mine alone
06:42This little one is a trust in my neck
06:44How do I allow?
06:45to live in a house full
06:47With lies, betrayal and disorder
06:49At night when my husband came back
06:51I gathered my courage and told him
06:53Stop deceiving
06:55I saw you today with my own eyes
06:56Don't deny it
06:57The words fell on him like a thunderbolt.
07:00And he realized that he was exposed
07:02He sat silently and then said coldly,
07:04Even if it was
07:05I'm a man
07:07I have the right to live as I want
07:09I screamed
07:09Where is my right?
07:11Where is your son's right to grow up in a clean home?
07:14Do you realize what you're doing is destroying us all?
07:17But he showed no remorse.
07:18It was as if his heart had turned to stone.
07:20Then I realized that this house was no longer safe.
07:24And continuing with him will only increase my pain.
07:26I spent the night thinking
07:28Then I prayed Fajr and asked God to guide me to the right path.
07:31I made my decision to face reality bravely.
07:34I preserve my dignity and my child
07:36In the morning I gathered some of my things.
07:38I took my son to my parents' house
07:40They welcomed me warmly.
07:41But I didn't reveal everything.
07:44I would just say that we have major disagreements.
07:47Long, difficult days passed for me
07:49But I found in it an inner comfort I had never tasted before.
07:52I started getting closer to God
07:54I am keen to raise my son in a healthy way
07:57I was sitting with him and teaching him.
07:59There are things he has no right to see or imitate.
08:03I assure him that manliness is not in transgression or in imitating what he sees
08:08Rather, in morals and respect, my husband tried to contact me repeatedly.
08:13But I didn't respond
08:14I knew that going back to him would mean returning the wound and bleeding.
08:18And I had chosen the path of inner peace.
08:21Today, after months, I feel stronger.
08:26I don't care what people say anymore
08:27Nor the looks of relatives
08:29Life is a school from which we learn harsh lessons.
08:32The biggest lesson I learned is that the child is a mirror of our actions.
08:36And the mistake he sees may be planted in his heart
08:39A deviation that is not easily erased
08:41This story is not for entertainment.
08:43Rather, it is a lesson for every husband and wife.
08:45Save your homes
08:46Do not think that children do not understand
08:49They see and record in their little memory.
08:52What we adults may neglect
08:54The spark that starts with a look or a passing situation may
08:58It turns into a fire that devours the whole family.
09:54Translated by Nancy Qanqar
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