- 2 days ago
(telegram@linkeex)
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00Happy wedding day!
00:05What the hell?
00:06I thought you were bluffing last night, but you actually went through with it.
00:13I'm married?
00:16Luca, when the hell are you getting married?
00:19Do you want me to crawl out of my coffin to see it myself?
00:22Hey, you know I'm allergic to women, so what do you want me to do?
00:25I don't care. You're getting married this year, or else you're banned from Christmas.
00:29Okay. Alright, you want me to get married? Fine.
00:43I'm Luca. Luca Blanchel.
00:46Who wants to be my wife?
00:48Oh shit!
00:52You know where the bathroom is? It's really...
00:56Last call.
00:58Who wants to be my wife? Raise your hand.
01:04I... I'm... I really... I really need...
01:07You!
01:14You okay?
01:17Who the hell are you?
01:19Let's get married.
01:21What?
01:23Where is my daughter-in-law? I am dying to meet her.
01:26What is this? Who am I married to? No, I don't want to get married. He needs a divorce.
01:31Betty, we are planning a wedding. I want it big, fancy, and tomorrow.
01:36No, no, no, no. I don't... Mom, I don't want a wedding. I need a divorce.
01:40Everyone, I'm...
01:41My son is getting married.
01:42But wait, why are you ignoring me? Oh my god.
01:46Alex, book me a flight to Italy. I'm not going to be married to some stranger. Be here in ten.
01:51Jesus Christ!
01:57You don't even know who your husband is.
02:00He was drunk. It was a mistake. I don't even remember his face.
02:04Please, I have to find him and get a divorce.
02:07That's a pity. He was tall, handsome.
02:10Really?
02:12Really?
02:13Oh, hello there, handsome.
02:23That's her idea of handsome.
02:30How am I supposed to divorce him if I can't find it?
02:32That girl...
02:38That girl...
03:02Welcome back, Mr. Blanchell.
03:12Sir, hi, excuse me, sir.
03:14I've been dreaming of working for Ava my entire life, and I was wondering if you could please show this to the CEO.
03:18I'm sorry. The CEO is allergic to women, so we don't hire female designers.
03:22Aller... allergic to women?
03:25Dumbest excuse I've ever heard.
03:33Look, it's Mr. Blanchell!
03:36That's Mr. Blanchell?
03:38That's him. Business legend.
03:40Just got back from Italy.
03:41Why does he look so familiar?
03:43Sir, your office on the 33rd floor is ready.
03:4533rd floor.
03:49Watch out, sir!
03:50No joke to women, right?
04:04Sir.
04:05Thank you, sir!
04:07Just...
04:09Get care of your meds down, okay?
04:13My allergy...
04:15Bring the meds to my office right now, okay?
04:16I got him, ma'am.
04:21Excuse me.
04:21It's me.
04:22Yeah.
04:26Where have I seen that woman before?
04:32Let's get married.
04:40Luca, thank God you're back.
04:42I found out who your wife is.
04:44When are you meeting her?
04:46Amazing.
04:47Okay, I can finally get this divorce and move on.
04:49Absolutely not.
04:50I won't allow you to divorce her.
04:52I'm not going to be married to some stranger, all right?
04:55I told you this.
04:56Oh, she's not a random.
04:57Yes, she is.
04:58She's a random person.
05:00And it doesn't even matter, okay?
05:01I'm not going to be around any woman.
05:03I'm done with this conversation, okay?
05:05Goodbye.
05:09Yo, oh my God.
05:11How did you get in here?
05:13Mr. Blanchell, hi.
05:14This is my jewelry design portfolio.
05:16If you just take a look at it, I promise you won't be disappointed.
05:19Okay.
05:20Whoa.
05:21Stay back.
05:22I'm warning you.
05:23I'm allergic to women.
05:24Okay.
05:25Mr. Blanchell, look.
05:26I get it.
05:27You big shots have to create these dramatic personas, but allergic to women?
05:30I mean, come on.
05:33Stop.
05:34Don't come any closer.
05:35I'm warning you.
05:37I'm not going to hurt you.
05:38No.
05:38I just need you to take a look at this.
05:39Stop.
05:40Women, you incredible...
05:41Don't take care of them.
05:42No, no, no, no.
05:42Oh my God.
06:01You touched...
06:02You're completely touching me.
06:03You're all over me.
06:04Okay, I'm tired.
06:04You're like...
06:05Oh my God.
06:07A lot of people keep doing this today.
06:09Where's my ointment?
06:10Where's my ointment?
06:12Why did you do this?
06:13Why did you do this?
06:19No reaction.
06:21Mr. Blanchell, drop the act, okay?
06:23The allergy thing is ridiculous.
06:25Level with me.
06:27Question.
06:28Does my face look any different than it did right over there?
06:31You're very handsome, Mr. Blanchell.
06:33Now please, just take a moment of your time.
06:37Oh my God.
06:39I won several awards back in college.
06:42Oh my God.
06:43This is incredible.
06:45Really?
06:46I knew you would have good taste.
06:48Perfect.
06:51This is perfect.
06:54Am I hired?
06:56Is that it?
06:57Can I just check, like, one last little thing?
07:03Of course, Mr. Blanchell, anything.
07:04Okay.
07:14What the hell was that?
07:15I asked you if I could do that.
07:17You said nothing about kissing me.
07:18No, I was very clear on it.
07:20Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
07:21You're hired.
07:22No, I would rather be jobless than work for somebody like you.
07:24Wait, no.
07:25No, this is incredible.
07:26You don't understand.
07:27I actually found a woman I'm not allergic to.
07:33Whoa!
07:35What was her name?
07:36What was your friggin' name?
07:40Isla.
07:43Was it my wife's name, Isla?
07:48Was it my wife's name, Isla?
07:49Isla?
07:54Isla.
07:56Isla?
07:56What was it?
07:57What the hell was her name?
08:07Hello?
08:08I'm sorry to tell you, we'll have to discharge her mother unless the rest of her bill was paid.
08:13No, doctor.
08:14Doctor, please don't do that.
08:15I'm going to come up with the money.
08:17You were hired.
08:21I shouldn't have freaked out like that.
08:27I lost the job.
08:34Hey, it's me.
08:35Uh-huh.
08:36Yeah.
08:37Uh-huh.
08:37Yeah, your landlord, remember me?
08:39Uh-huh.
08:40I need last quarter's rent.
08:41Uh-huh.
08:42I need the money now.
08:45Yeah.
08:47Sure thing, I'll send it right over.
08:49Woo!
08:49Okay, Mom, you know I'm allergic to women.
08:58This marriage is a total mistake.
09:00Is that how I raised you?
09:01Family comes first.
09:02Now treat your wife right.
09:04Fine.
09:17Thank you, babe.
09:18Uh-huh.
09:19That was amazing.
09:20So much better than my wife.
09:24That is for you.
09:26And I will see you next week.
09:29See you then.
09:34You're my wife.
09:37This is a new kind of role play.
09:43Darling, what kind of service can I offer you today?
09:46I didn't know.
09:47Don't touch me.
09:48Oh, what the hell is wrong with my wife?
09:52Weirdo.
09:57Figures.
09:58Damn, that's cool.
09:58After this payment, I won't even have enough cash for groceries.
10:10I need a job.
10:11Fast.
10:12Ila.
10:13Ila.
10:13My daughter-in-law.
10:14My daughter-in-law.
10:16I have finally found you.
10:19Daughter-in-law.
10:20You married my son a year ago.
10:23I have been searching for you ever since.
10:26A year ago.
10:27A year ago.
10:28Seriously?
10:28Seriously.
10:29Seriously.
10:29You okay?
10:31Who are you?
10:33Let's get married.
10:34Come on.
10:35Ma'am.
10:36Ma'am, I don't think you understand.
10:38This marriage was a mistake.
10:41We're getting a divorce.
10:42A divorce?
10:43A divorce?
10:44A divorce?
10:45What?
10:46That is not happening.
10:48Did something go wrong the last time you two saw each other?
10:52Last time we saw each other?
10:53Oh!
10:54That's him!
10:55Where are you?
10:56Well, get to St. Mary's right now.
11:00Your wife is here.
11:01I'm not meeting that bitch, Mom.
11:05What did he say?
11:06How dare you talk about your wife like that?
11:08I am sitting right here with her.
11:09Get over here right now and apologize.
11:11Not a chance.
11:12I'm never going to say sorry to her.
11:13That is not-
11:14You listen here, you misogynistic, sexist pig.
11:18No woman in her right mind would want to stay your wife.
11:21Perfect.
11:22That's exactly what I was going to say.
11:28Wait, Isla.
11:29There's got to be some sort of misunderstanding.
11:31No, ma'am.
11:32You need to understand.
11:33That man is not staying my husband.
11:39No!
11:40Isla is too perfect.
11:41No way I'm letting them get divorced.
11:49You idiot!
11:50What the hell were you saying on the phone?
11:52That is your wife.
11:53Okay, Mom.
11:54You know I'm allergic to women.
11:55And she's an escort.
11:56Okay?
11:57I'm going to divorce her.
11:58So what if you never find a woman you're not allergic to?
12:01You're just going to stay single forever?
12:06A woman who won't make me allergic.
12:07It won't make me allergic.
12:19I already found her.
12:20No way.
12:21No way.
12:26Doctor.
12:27Hey.
12:28Hi.
12:29Look, I promise I'll get you this next bill as soon as I get my paycheck.
12:33I'm working part time so it's just taking a little longer.
12:37Oh, Isla.
12:38Why bother struggling?
12:40One night with me and you will never have to worry about bills again.
12:48Billy.
12:49That's okay.
12:50Let's go.
12:51Get off!
12:54Scrazy!
12:55You say that away from me.
12:57You dare hit me!
12:59You just made a big mistake.
13:01Billy, what are you doing?
13:03Billy, put that down.
13:04You don't scare me.
13:06You should be scared.
13:09Help.
13:10No one will come to your rescue.
13:11Help!
13:12Help! Somebody help!
13:25Threaten her again and I'll fucking kill you!
13:31You okay?
13:32I'm okay.
13:33You're fired.
13:34Fired?
13:36Who the hell do you think you are?
13:37I'm Luca Blancho.
13:39Mr. Blancho?
13:40Wait.
13:41The hospital's biggest shareholder?
13:44I just texted the board.
13:45Get out!
13:46Mr. Blancho, I need this job, please.
13:48I'll do anything.
13:49I said get out.
13:55You alright?
14:00Yeah.
14:03Um, what are you doing here?
14:06I actually came to ask you for a favor.
14:10Right.
14:12Let me guess, you saved me so now you want me to sleep with you.
14:17No, absolutely not.
14:22I'd actually like you to be my wife.
14:25No.
14:38So let me get this straight.
14:40You want me to pretend to be your wife so you can get divorced.
14:45Exactly.
14:47Okay.
14:48You need to understand, you are the only woman I am not allergic to.
14:52That makes you uniquely qualified.
14:55And to keep things discreet, I'll hire you as my personal assistant.
14:59Okay?
15:01I think you'd be better off finding somebody else.
15:04Okay?
15:05I'm guessing you still have a lot of medical bills to pay for, huh?
15:11If you do this, I'll pay you.
15:17Handsomely.
15:18How handsome we talking.
15:19Name your price.
15:20That could save mom.
15:21He doesn't look like a bad guy.
15:22He could help me pay for the medical bills.
15:23In that case, Mr. Blanchelle, I would be honored to be your assistant.
15:24Okay.
15:25Okay.
15:26I just need you to act like my wife in front of my mom.
15:27How exactly does somebody act like your wife?
15:28How exactly does somebody act like your wife?
15:29In that case.
15:30How exactly does somebody act like your wife?
15:31That could save mom.
15:35He doesn't look like a bad guy.
15:38He could help me pay for the medical bills.
15:42In that case, Mr. Blanchel, I would be honored to be your assistant.
15:49Okay, I just need you to act like my wife in front of my mom.
15:53How exactly does somebody act like your wife?
15:56I guess we'll find out, won't we?
16:16Don't forget, tomorrow you and your wife are meeting.
16:19Be on time, be perfect, and don't you dare let her divorce you.
16:24Okay, I've got it. Thank you.
16:26I cannot wait for this divorce to be over.
16:31Mr. Blanchel, why are you so intent on divorcing your wife?
16:34Because she's a nightmare. Trust me.
16:37Can't be worse than my husband.
16:41You're married?
16:43Yep.
16:45What's he like?
16:46He's an arrogant, egotistical jerk, and I've decided to divorce him, too.
16:57Well, then, cheers to, uh, successful divorces.
17:01So, first day on the job, how's it going?
17:10Well, I haven't quit yet, so pretty good.
17:14Your wife will be there at the Westland Hotel, 8 p.m.
17:17Don't be late.
17:18First order of business.
17:22I, uh, I need you to come with me tonight to get divorced.
17:26Okay.
17:27Sounds like a plan.
17:30Dear Isla, meet my son at the Westland Hotel, 8 p.m. sharp.
17:34Uh, Mr. Blanchel, I'm sorry.
17:38I can't come tonight.
17:38I've got an appointment of my own.
17:40Also divorce-related?
17:43Also divorce-related.
17:45Well, here's to, uh, starting over.
17:48It's up, it ends better than it started.
17:57Time to face the disgusting man.
18:04Ma'am, the presidential suite fee is just this way.
18:12Everything's been prepared as requested.
18:30What the hell?
18:32He actually planned a divorce meeting here.
18:36He's trying to humiliate me on purpose.
18:39Room service!
18:42I'm sorry, I didn't order this.
18:45We got this order for suite fee.
18:46Well, there must be...
18:47One second, that.
18:53I needed this.
18:59Here's to successful divorces and getting away from this jerk soon.
19:08It's weird.
19:14This drink feels stronger than usual.
19:16It's starting to feel busy.
19:2030 minutes late.
19:22Tipful.
19:23Ridiculous.
19:24Ma'am, it's already a little tipsy.
19:27Perfect.
19:28The stage is set.
19:29Let the magic begin.
19:30Uh, Mr. Blanchett.
19:36Hmm?
19:36Your wife is waiting for you and a presidential suite fee.
19:39Presidential suite fee.
19:40For a divorce?
19:41When that bastard gets here, I'm going to give him a piece of my mind.
19:53God.
19:55I've had too much.
19:57You can do this, Luca.
19:59End this ridiculousness already.
20:01Who is it?
20:05Your husband.
20:08Finally.
20:09God.
20:11Oh, Jesus Christ.
20:20It's you.
20:21It's you?
20:25Mr. Blanchett, what are you doing here?
20:27I'm waiting for my husband.
20:28Yeah, I'm here to divorce my wife.
20:31Wait, does that mean that you're...
20:36My wife's supposed to be some sleazy gold digger.
20:40Can't be her.
20:41Okay.
20:42I'm sorry.
20:42I think there's some sort of mix-up.
20:44They told me to come to suite B.
20:46I don't know.
20:46Maybe they meant D.
20:49I'm sorry.
20:50I've had a lot to drink, so I'm going to go.
20:52All right.
20:58Why leave?
21:05We need to have...
21:07I think I need you.
21:13Wait, wait, wait, wait.
21:14Wait, wait, uh...
21:15Are you, like, mistaking me for someone wrong?
21:18No, Luca.
21:19I know it's you.
21:20I want it to be you.
21:21Wait, wait.
21:23You're sure you want this?
21:25Yes.
21:25More than any.
21:26Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
21:35Your husband can walk in any second.
21:37We can't do...
21:38Screw my husband.
21:39No.
21:40No.
21:40No.
21:40No.
21:41No.
21:56Did I see you're a risk?
22:04I came here to meet my husband.
22:08How the hell did I end up sleeping with Mr. Blanchel?
22:11This is insane.
22:14I have to get out of here.
22:15Come on.
22:17You want to touch that body, I don't care where you've been.
22:24It's like some f***ed tough barbies on collectible skin.
22:26Look and got...
22:27Luca?
22:27Yes, I knew you wouldn't let me tell.
22:33What the hell?
22:34Congratulations.
22:36You and your wife, when you spent the night together.
22:38Oh, and let me see.
22:41No sign of a rash.
22:44I knew it.
22:45You two are meant for each other.
22:47Wait, wait, wait, wait.
22:48You're telling me the woman I was with last night, that was my wife?
22:54Well, yes.
22:56Who else would you think it would be?
22:58That was Iva last night, not the other woman.
23:01She must have misunderstood everything.
23:02Time to start planning the wedding.
23:04Okay, Mom, I think this is a big misunderstanding, okay?
23:07Listen, Luca.
23:08Don't screw this up.
23:09If you do, don't bother coming home at Christmas.
23:12Okay.
23:14Sure.
23:15Good.
23:22I need to find a way to tell my mom the truth.
23:25The woman I slept with last night...
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