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AmusantTranscription
00:00Sonic is the antivirus that never runs out of supply to a frog out of habit, and then says he doesn't remember any frogs being in the other universe, and gets told that the only frogs they saw were in that Frogger game.
00:12So Sonic says to stop it, and Tails drives it into a corner and picks it up, and after padding, Sonic says them going to the Frogger must have pushed it out of the game or something.
00:22Or something indeed. You'd think Sonic or Iggy would have seen the frog follow them in all that time.
00:27What, it followed them into the place where Psyche is? Or did it just wait in the DMV?
00:34Iggy's smart enough to say it's probably an or something, and the output device has some Street Fighter characters escape it, like Chun-Li.
00:42Even though there was no indication all of them were near the output device in cyberspace, and in fact, their games were pretty far from it, so Igman must have told them to go to it.
00:52Because Sonic never went in there. Chun-Li appeals to his ego by saying that she brought her friends to make sure he'll defend his honor by fighting.
01:00A better reason for him fighting is that they'll never stop going after him until he wins.
01:05I hate that the story takes a million years describing the looks of the characters in a giant paragraph, because it's so boring.
01:12And this is Sonic who's facing them. So he could win immediately by spin-dashing at their ankles to make them fall over.
01:20He could run around them while punching them the whole time and win in seconds.
01:24They're not organic. So why would he hold back?
01:28Instead, the fight starts with Sonic jumping to dodge someone else's attack, because the fastest thing alive wasn't the fastest to attack.
01:36And he lands on Chun-Li's forehead, but she magically doesn't collapse to the ground from the weight and force, because she's a magical creature.
01:46Tails does a badnik bounce on multiple of them, including Chun-Li, and the story starts wasting time on padding as the fighters politely let them talk to each other.
01:55Iggy threatens the fighters with a security level 10 handset that she could use to delete them.
02:00Why doesn't she just do it already instead of threatening them to ruin the element of surprise?
02:04She's so stupid for not wanting to use it against them and holding herself back, when she knows they're just pro-grams.
02:11Instead, Ken kicks it into the air, and everyone but Iggy jumps towards it.
02:16Down-Stim catches it, and because he's another new character, it describes him as well as other new rivals for a giant paragraph.
02:24It's a good thing I had Street Fighter II as a kid, so I know what their real names are and what they're supposed to look like.
02:30Why does he even get the chance to taunt him instead of Sonic running up to him at Sonic's speed to instantly ram him instead of flying far ahead of his bodyguards?
02:39What's the point of writing this if you're not going to have Sonic be like Sonic, except for the fact that he badnik bounces?
02:47Somehow, Sonic decides to prevent Tails from running at him, and despairs that they couldn't possibly take out all the fighters, just because Chun-Li almost beat him, when he'd know that it was only because he didn't want to fight a girl and was in a cramped room.
03:01Dalsim manages to crush the black box because of this nonsense.
03:06It would've been good writing if instead, Sonic accidentally damaged the black box because Dalsim dropped it from getting rammed.
03:14Eggman redundantly tells the fighters to finish them from the Eggmobile.
03:18So now there's more padding with this redundant boasting.
03:22Eggman says he's decided to replace his robots with computerized badniks, but not because their batteries are better.
03:29It says because there's no nasty oil stains, like Mr. Pollution would think those are nasty.
03:35And they're easily reprogrammed and come in better colors.
03:38Why are they more easily reprogrammed?
03:41Why couldn't he just give his own robots whatever colors he wants?
03:45If they were more easily reprogrammed, they would've all recognized Sonic and Tails.
03:50Eggman says that in a few hours the whole planet will be covered with them, and then his reign will begin.
03:56As a ruler of mindless robots, not an actual ruler.
04:00What's the point if he's not governing people?
04:02This is so boring.
04:04Sonic futilely tells him he'll never succeed,
04:07and Eggman wastes my time saying that he wants his computer next to throw everyone into cyberspace,
04:12when he won't succeed anyways.
04:15And is even smart enough to consider stealing Tails' tank design for it.
04:20He's taunted by an amplified voice from that very tank,
04:23and Replica Sonic is piloting it.
04:26That's good, but him firing the tank instantly would've been way better instead of making him aware of him.
04:32There was no foreshadowing that he'd wise up and leave his game when he acted like he wouldn't.
04:38I'm glad he thought things through offscreen and changed his mind.
04:42He says he brought some friends, and five humans dived down towards the martial artists,
04:47but not directly onto them unfortunately, because that would've started the fighting instantly,
04:52instead of them staring at each other for a second.
04:55The fighters consisted of Ryu and Ken and Blanka.
04:59How did Replica Sonic convince some Street Fighter characters to fight other Street Fighter characters,
05:04if they only decided to fight Sonic because they were following their programming to work for Eggman?
05:09They would've just identified Replica Sonic as a rogue program,
05:13or they would've changed their mind as soon as they saw Eggman.
05:18How insulting to Sonic and Tails that they needed to be saved by other Street Fighter characters.
05:23This should've been a comedy bit where they were all knocked to the floor in a second by Sonic running
05:27into them with his fists out. Even Sad AM Sonic would do that.
05:33Good crossovers are in service to both franchises.
05:36This one portrays the Street Fighter characters as evil and mindless AI,
05:40instead of showing me what their personalities were actually supposed to be like.
05:44These characters are nostalgic to me, but the way the story uses them is awful.
05:49How do the computer generated colors of Replica Sonic look strange under real sunlight?
05:55I don't know because it doesn't tell me.
05:58He's not really computer generated, it's just an alternate universe.
06:01Because computers don't work that way. The internet doesn't work that way.
06:06It's apathetic of Sonic to not want to watch the fight.
06:10I wanted to expect that from Sonic in these books.
06:13He tells his friends to get to the tank's battle stations.
06:16There's padding until the tank starts firing.
06:19It's epic that the tank gets used again.
06:21Especially because it was built by Tails and a bunch of other people you'd never expect to build it.
06:26Which is inspiring instead of just Sonic getting to do everything.
06:30So the tank should've been written to show up before Sonic would have to do any fighting.
06:34It's too bad the writer insists on describing it hit by hit to pad it out several paragraphs.
06:39Instead of being realistic and having them all get wiped out in seconds from every weapon getting used at once.
06:46Every time one of the fighters gets killed, he shrinks to a point of light and disappears.
06:51So he's just as much a magical creature outside of cyberspace.
06:55When I thought the only reason the programs died like that was that they were in cyberspace.
07:00What's it supposed to mean by put P to?
07:03I assume from context it means kill.
07:06I wish the writer used a variation of that instead.
07:10Tails was even smart enough to put sleep gas in the tank.
07:14At one point it says the clothes of the fighters were torn from the fight and scorched by the weapons.
07:20How are any of the fighters not completely vaporized by the weapons?
07:25It's awesome that Tails gets to say finish them off.
07:27Especially since Eggman had said it.
07:30He sees the Eggmobile lower a bomb out of its trap door and chop it towards the top of the tank.
07:36After padding, Tails grabs Iggy and dives out of the tank and flies away from the potential bomb blast.
07:44And as she gets out of his grip, the two Sonics land behind them.
07:48The lack of an explosion was given away by the words waiting for the explosion.
07:53A faint blue-white light glows over the tank's edge that expands making the tank disappear.
07:59The story drags this out boringly for two huge paragraphs.
08:03The four heroes retreat and the replica Sonic gets told to jump back into the cyberspace world and does so.
08:09It's a way to Tails to of course wonder if he's okay when the computer gets destroyed.
08:14It's nice of Sonic to hope he is.
08:17Since the computer screen can get blown up by the reformat bomb,
08:21that proves it's not just programs that get destroyed by it.
08:25The edge of the program's ball of energy had passed over Sonic before he had noticed,
08:30but all it does is give him a strange, tingling feeling before the expanding light disappears.
08:35So it only affects metal stuff.
08:38Eggman taunts them, padding out the story, and shows them a black box and presses a button
08:43to make a small point of light appear between Sonic and Tails that flashes red, green, and blue
08:48and expands to a robot fish that flops in the air.
08:52Why'd he pick that?
08:54He even starts pressing new codes into the box after that.
08:57I love that Sonic gets to snark-
08:59Oh yeah, very impressive that.
09:02Too bad he keeps it going in a way that isn't as great of a line and states the obvious,
09:07which is explaining the joke.
09:10That sounds familiar.
09:11This book has officially done all the major things wrong with comedy that colors went on to do.
09:17Tails won't think he needs to justify spin jumping the badnik to pieces,
09:21Its pieces fly outwards but slow and stop and then put themselves back together.
09:27That's overpowered.
09:28He must have used nanobots.
09:31Eggman brags that every computerized badnik is like this.
09:34Most of his dialogue is redundant.
09:37He says he has a pocket output device and says it's great for breaking the ice at parties before he laughs.
09:43Sonic lampshades that no one invites him to parties.
09:46It's nicer to assume the writer knew that and was having Eggman be intentionally dishonest as a joke.
09:52Another robot called a buzzer gets made from light and four of the new badniks start attacking,
09:57only to be destroyed and reformed.
09:59Eggman says he knows he isn't invited to parties, and that's why he's evil.
10:04Eggman says the hideous accident turned him into this.
10:08So he didn't need to have him make this petty excuse for being evil.
10:11It doesn't make any sense that he would blame other people for it.
10:15If he remembers that accident, then he'd know that's the only reason he turned evil.
10:20The writers only have him claim that a decent social life would have kept him from being turned evil as a joke in the story.
10:26Eventually he presses a button to make the badniks form into a giant scorpion with a massive cannon tail.
10:32How did he need to spend months programming it?
10:35He'd only have to give it the same programming as the badniks.
10:39All it would have to do is try to kill Sonic.
10:42Iggy gets snatched, and so does Tails, and aims the cannon for Sonic.
10:46Somehow he gulps instead of immediately trying to attack.
10:49Without mocking the Eggman's being portrayed, I wonder if the robot itself is going to malfunction.
10:54It does.
10:56So then him summoning the robot fish would have worked better at this point.
11:02It stops moving, and the buttons Eggman's pressing don't work,
11:06and the black box explodes covering Eggman's face in front with black soot and burn marks.
11:12The narration says he swore when all he said was blankety-blank.
11:16I assume this isn't literally what he's saying.
11:19It'd be better to just use symbols.
11:22It makes sense if Eggman to swear because he's an adult, not to mention a human.
11:26And more importantly, he just experienced a box exploding on his hand.
11:30So what I'm not swearing would be impossible.
11:33He must have had rings that kept his fingers and hands from being destroyed.
11:37But not enough to keep him from getting this hurt.
11:40What kind of a name is Scipio anyways?
11:43Even Eggman wouldn't have a name that bad.
11:46The Scipio becomes fuzzy and melts and fades away in static.
11:50Tails lampshades how odd that was.
11:53The remains of the blown-up computer glow and slowly rise in circles, zooming back into the base of the monitor.
11:59And the computer reforms and the screen shows Replica Sonic.
12:03It's nice that Sonic's happy that he made it.
12:06Replica says he saved them by using Psyche.
12:10Somehow, Tails doesn't immediately know who he used to save them from the female gender pronoun.
12:16Eventually he says she told him where all of Eggman's crucial files were and they deleted it,
12:21and blew up every output device in the place and trashed all of his bad programs.
12:27So that's why the Scipio disappeared.
12:29But from another universe?
12:31How?
12:32It's great that he's around.
12:34Because that means there's a backup Sonic if anything happens to the real Sonic.
12:39Eggie says nice work and Psyche says Eggie did all the hard work.
12:44She did nothing.
12:45Apparently, Eggie gave her the idea.
12:48There's more padding until the back end of the Eggmobile explodes and the Eggmobile falls.
12:54The front and back of the small plane cracks apart and falls off.
12:59Eggman presses the control and the straining jets blast him towards the horizon.
13:04But he flies feet first because somehow he thought to have it strapped on backwards.
13:10I would have been mad at this confusingly forced portrayal of Eggman,
13:14but the majority of the story has him be amazingly competent with a cyberspace computer
13:18and computer virus and invincible badniks.
13:23Also, when I had him show self-awareness, it wasn't the wrong kind.
13:27Like, I know I say that every time.
13:30Where a crazy dictator wannabe would never be self-aware enough to say that.
13:34He did just enough introspection to know he's bitter, which anyone could do,
13:39and just made up a lame excuse for it to have an excuse to demonize his enemies, which is realistic.
13:45Forcing Eggman to be lame is still unacceptable, but it could be a lot worse.
13:51Sonic wanted to ask if the computer network's safe now when he was told it was.
13:55There's Redundant confirming that he's right, and Tails uses dated slang for no reason.
14:01Tails gives replica Sonic and Psyche a purpose in life as guardians of the computer,
14:07to be in charge of looking for Eggman and his badniks.
14:10That's sweet, because I know a meaner writer would have killed off the so-called Sonic too.
14:16Instead, Sonic calls him excellent, and calls Psyche cool.
14:20Well, she was cool, but she also came out of nowhere to save Sonic,
14:24so that's why I think it's a little lame that she's getting shilped.
14:27How is she any different from the Ancient Walkers?
14:30Iggy gets appointed the official link with these two and him,
14:33and Sonic just has to break the fourth wall again.
14:37Realistically, he's hungry after all of his time,
14:39so he and Tails get to enjoy a pizza that got the garlic and extra cheese just right.
14:43They eat it over the edge of a crater that used to be Winged Fortress.
14:48The two of them waste time talking to each other boringly.
14:52Tails' dialogue about what they already know is so stilted.
14:56If they know this, why are they discussing it?
14:59So saying we know is like as you know.
15:02What a cringey paragraph.
15:04It just recaps what we already know.
15:07Realistically, Sonic says he can hardly face Street Fighter II again.
15:11Tails wonders if Eggman infected his game gear,
15:15because he said he infected all of the computers.
15:18And he says that's a computer too.
15:20No it isn't.
15:22But having to show his friend that he has nothing to be afraid of
15:25is enough to give him the courage to put the Street Fighter II cartridge into it.
15:30There is no such cartridge for the game gear.
15:33It's just artistic license.
15:35The story could have easily ended there.
15:38Instead Tails lampshades this.
15:41And when he uses some more dated slang,
15:42Sonic gets to tell him to stop.
15:44I get to read about Tails praising the pizza he ate.
15:47Although he pads out the book by praising it more than once.
15:51He thanks Sonic and calls him Buddy.
15:53And Sonic turns the game gear on and acts scared and drops it on the grass.
15:57He was only joking, and that wasn't acceptable to joke about because it really scared him.
16:03So it's cathartic that he gives,
16:05I'll give you only joking, you rotter, and throws mud into his spikes.
16:10This handles it so much better than STC.
16:13Sonic gets mad, but when it dawns on him that everything's back to normal now,
16:17so he can goof off enough to dunk Tails in a waterfall, he shouts yes.
16:22So at least he's not mad anymore.
16:24And it's more a case of two friends feeling safe enough with each other
16:27that they think teasing each other isn't the end of the world.
16:31It's still not how their friendship is supposed to be.
16:34But at least most of the book has their friendship be good anyways.
16:38It's like if their entire friendship was based on sarcasm and doubting each other.
16:42It's too bad the story ends explaining that Sonic's pals have been sucked into cyberspace again,
16:47and infected with a disintegrator virus.
16:50And Sonic has to face the worst of badniks from his favorite computer games.
16:55Why would you end at an interesting and exciting part?
16:58Why does it call the enemies from non-Sonic games badniks?
17:02That misses what the word badnik actually means?
17:05What's so special and great about the word badnik
17:08if you're using it for something other than robots that are shaped like animals or insects?
17:14If they just destroyed all of the computers,
17:17he wouldn't have had to deal with that.
17:20This book by James Wallace was an interesting story about
17:23Tails and then Sonic traveling through another universe that Eggman used as a computer.
17:28The worldbuilding of this book is awesome.
17:31It takes full advantage of the fact that it's a cyberspace universe and can be as weird as he wants.
17:36The output device is an eyeball.
17:40It's too bad the story constantly has overly descriptive narration and boring dialogue to pad itself out.
17:47So there's a lot of boring parts from the slow pacing.
17:51But it was brilliant for Eggman to infect his enemies with the computer virus that forced them to go back into cyberspace.
17:57And making invincible badniks was also cool.
18:01It was also a lot like Sonic Colors.
18:04Having Eggman be portrayed shockingly mockingly.
18:07And Sonic and Tails tease each other occasionally.
18:11Which is bad, but at least it's rare.
18:12And usually Eggman's the opposite.
18:14It also had a lot of comedy.
18:17Which just barely is good even if I didn't like most of it.
18:22The majority of the time the plot isn't about telling jokes.
18:26The jokes are not the point of every scene and the only reason they exist when you could remove most of them and not be confused.
18:33And the plot always felt oppressively dark.
18:36From at first it seeming to be impossible for Tails to get out of cyberspace.
18:40And then the heroes having a genuine challenge trying to figure out how to get the cure.
18:45And Sonic takes the plot seriously.
18:48That's why all the comedy isn't intrusive and story ruining.
18:51It's just there.
18:53So you don't have to love it to like the story.
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