00:00Am I ready?
00:02Murphy Brown, where are they now?
00:04Take one.
00:05And action.
00:07I left FYI a few years ago.
00:09You couldn't tell the evening news from an episode of Entertainment Tonight.
00:14The problem was I didn't know what to do with myself.
00:17And then we had an election.
00:22We are wonderful!
00:24I left FYI because the network asked me to anchor their morning show, Wake Up America.
00:31It was all going fine until the weather girl took a couple of weeks off for foot surgery.
00:36She came back to the show with double D's.
00:38When she stood next to the weather map, we couldn't see Oregon.
00:41The next thing I know, she's in, I'm out.
00:45Over here.
00:47Better over here.
00:49I too left FYI.
00:51I thought I needed a break.
00:52But work is my middle name.
00:54I got a job offer.
00:55I thought it would be a nice change of pace from the pressure cooker of a weekly news magazine, but...
01:00Two years on The View.
01:03Nearly killed me.
01:04The gossip, the fighting, the backstabbing.
01:06Every day was like an episode of Game of Thrones.
01:09Minus the fur vests.
01:11It's a whole new world out there.
01:13OJ is out.
01:14Nazis are in.
01:15Nazis.
01:16I started imagining myself going undercover as one of them.
01:18Putting on my cotton dockers and my Lacoste shirt and going to Ikea to buy a torch.
01:22Don't get me started.
01:24Remember when Walter Cronkite was the most trusted man in America?
01:28Now you've got a bunch of talking heads with no journalistic cred who think Yitzhak Rabin was a judge on Project Runway.
01:35It was time to come back with a new show.
01:38Pat Patel here.
01:39New guy.
01:40Director of technology and social media for said new show.
01:43My job is to bring all the, uh, olds into the 21st century.
01:48This was actually Murphy's phone before I intervened.
01:53I mean, I knew they existed, but I had never seen one in person.
01:57Look.
01:58It opens.
01:59No home button.
02:00No Siri.
02:01I mean, how did she live?
02:03She's on AOL, too.
02:04Don't mock the classics.
02:05After my brother Phil passed, I took over what has always been Washington's favorite watering hole since 1919.
02:14Um, I hung one of those, uh, whiteboards in back of the bar.
02:18And every Friday night, we add the names of the people that had been fired by the White House that week.
02:24Yeah.
02:26We're gonna need a bigger board.
02:27So we had to do something.
02:30Get the old gang together.
02:31Take on this crazy new world of alternative facts and fake news.
02:36It's our civic duty.
02:38And besides, you missed us.
02:42You know you did.
02:44R-E-S-B-E-C-T
02:46Wow!
02:47R-E-S-B-E-C-T
02:49You know, it's not nice to mimic someone.
02:51It, uh, it's a mimic.
02:53I'm a respected journalist!
02:57R-E-S-B-E-C-T
02:59The Murfinator!
03:01If you are any of the following, a smoker, a manic depressive, a fan of Donald Trump, or a collector of Nazi memorabilia, this isn't going to work.
03:10When I spoke to Satan this morning before breakfast, he pretty much guaranteed this would be a great experience.
03:18R-E-S-B-E-C-T
03:19Primetime TV has Murphy Brown mocking the importance of fathers.
03:23Women in this country legally have a choice.
03:28At least I think they still do.
03:29I haven't checked the paper today.
03:32Here's some ice chips, Murphy.
03:34Can I put some in your mouth?
03:36I see your hands are full.
03:37Cut me open and get this kid out of me.
03:39Use a rotten, stinking melon baller if you have to.
03:41Just do it!
03:42R-E-S-B-E-C-T
03:43You make me feel like a natural woman.
03:53Cause you make me feel
03:56This is my job.
03:57You make me feel
03:59Yes, we can!
04:00You make me feel like a natural
04:04Which one of you turkeys got their greasy fingerprints all over my Emmy?
04:10All right, see, fast!
04:12R-E-S-B-E-C-T
04:15R-E-S-B-E-C-T
04:15R-E-S-B-E-C-T
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