00:00Welcome to WatchMojo, and today we're counting down our picks for the top 10
00:09hilariously bad crying scenes in movies.
00:1210. ASRO'S ARREST – MONKEY TROUBLE
00:24When an unwittingly young girl discovers a runaway pet monkey in the park, all manner
00:29of chaos ensues in this charming family comedy.
00:32In the role of Azro, Harvey Keitel plays an eccentric vagabond on the hunt for his pit
00:37pocket monkey.
00:38While the film features countless hysterical hijinks, the true comedy occurs when Azro
00:49is arrested, only to be reduced to a wailing mess.
00:57As if the character himself is confused by Keitel's nebulous rendition of tears, he finds
01:02it necessary to clear that he is, in fact, crying, which makes for one of the film's
01:06most iconic lines.
01:079. THE LAST SUPPER – SIGNS
01:14I'm going to have a cheeseburger with bacon. Extra bacon.
01:21In this star-studded horror flick from M. Night Shyamalan, a former priest played by Mel Gibson
01:26fights desperately to protect his children from an alien invasion. By all accounts, SIGNS is
01:31a masterclass in thrilling cinema. However, it's not entirely out of left field to call
01:35the dinner scene a little...much.
01:38Stop crying!
01:39It's stellar acting by all on-screen, but the mashed potatoes, man. All four characters
01:44are in tears, and Mel Gibson's father Graham is...shoveling mashed potatoes in his mouth.
01:49It's truly a sight to behold, but maybe not quite for the emotional effect the film was striving for.
01:54Number 8. Henry Roth's Fake Tears – 51st Dates
02:0851st Dates follows bachelor Henry Roth as he pursues the girl of his dreams, only to discover
02:13she suffers from short-term memory loss. Starring Adam Sandler and Drew Barrymore,
02:18this uproarious comedy packs a punch, especially in this wailing scene.
02:22Excuse me, are you okay? I didn't mean to startle you.
02:25Oh, that's alright.
02:25Are you okay?
02:27Yeah, I'm fine. I'm having a problem with something, but...
02:29Early on in the film, Henry attempts to woo Barrymore's character, Lucy,
02:33through a dramatic display of tears. In classic Sandler fashion, Henry's fit is so boisterous
02:38and over-the-top that it's nearly impossible not to burst out in laughter.
02:42I just...can't...read. You gotta be kidding me.
02:49The water for tears? Classic move. Not to mention,
02:52he tops the performance off by falsely claiming to be illiterate.
02:55I'll tell you what, why don't you come over there with me,
02:58you can have some breakfast and I'll help teach you some of the words.
03:02Okay.
03:03Number 7. Seth Davis Begs for Approval – Boiler Room
03:07Starring Giovanni Ribisi, Boiler Room tells the story of a 19-year-old college dropout Seth Davis.
03:13Eager to gain the approval of his father, Seth blindly accepts a job at a shady investment firm.
03:18I'm sorry I couldn't get the job that you wanted me to have.
03:22Before long, he finds himself in the middle of an FBI investigation and must decide where his loyalty lies.
03:28Who gives a shit? Because I'm good at what I do, Dad. I'm good at what I do.
03:34While the movie capitalizes on a thrilling storyline, it unintentionally toes the line of comedy,
03:40particularly where dramatic scenes are involved. At the emotional climax,
03:43Seth weeps in desperation as he begs for his father's blessing,
03:47but thanks to Ribisi's clown-like expressions and nasal delivery,
03:50this scene quickly deteriorates into a laughable attempt at depicting despair.
03:54And then I would have to do this job because I thought it was what you wanted me to be doing!
03:59Number 6. Elliot and Alma Moore Are Doomed – The Happening
04:03When an infection that causes victims to kill themselves ravages humanity,
04:07a science teacher named Elliot fights tooth and nail to survive.
04:10While many M. Night Shyamalan films have been well-received over the years,
04:13The Happening is arguably one of his least successful productions.
04:19As Elliot and his wife, played by Mark Wahlberg and Zooey Deschanel,
04:23traverse the countryside in an increasingly dangerous environment,
04:26the plot grows more and more confusing, while the acting is questionable at best.
04:31I wish you were here.
04:40This is all too clear when the couple is overwhelmed by their impending fate,
04:44and burst into tears, or at least try to. Their attempts at crying are so strained,
04:49it's hard to take this scene seriously.
04:51Elliot?
04:53Yeah?
04:55It's just making sure you're there.
05:05Number 5. Jean Grey's End – X- The Last Stand
05:09In the third installment of the X-Men franchise, Wolverine and his mutant comrades
05:13battle an evil reincarnation of their fallen friend, Jean Grey.
05:24Despite its enthralling battle scenes and comic book allure,
05:27the film falls embarrassingly short in its emotional performances.
05:31This is most evident when Wolverine must kill Jean in order to end her madness.
05:35Save me.
05:38I love you.
05:40Holding her dead body in his arms, Hugh Jappman makes a rather strange whimper as he rocks her back and
05:45forth before dramatically wailing into the sky. And of course, the only word he can think to scream
05:50is NOOOOO! Ah, the classic Hollywood cliché.
05:57NOOOOOO!
06:00Number 4. The Tragic Misunderstanding – Romeo and Juliet
06:04In this modern adaptation of Shakespeare's classic love story, Leonardo DiCaprio and Claire
06:09Daines play infatuated lovers on a tragic collision course.
06:12Now kiss thy lips. That place of poison yet does hang on.
06:19While young DiCaprio is undeniably brilliant, it's Daines' performance – and her unforgettable
06:24crying – that caught our attention. At the climax of the film, Romeo poisons himself after
06:29mistaking Juliet for dead. You know how it goes. Upon then finding her lover on the verge of real
06:34death, Juliet is in shambles.
06:35Poison.
06:39Drunk all? And left no friendly job to help me after?
06:42In a clamorous fit of tears and distorted facial expressions, Claire Daines illustrates
06:47why she's one of the most renowned ugly criers in Hollywood.
06:50Number 3. Peter Cries in the Streets – Vampire's Kiss
07:03Nicolas Cage is the king of absurd performances, and there's no better example than his role of
07:08Peter Lowe in Vampire's Kiss.
07:12Christ! The tortures of the damned!
07:17After a passionate one-night stand that ends with a bite on the neck,
07:20his New York City Playboard character becomes convinced he is a vampire.
07:24Though there are no apparent signs of a vampiric transformation,
07:27Peter dons fake fangs and prowls the streets for victims.
07:30Throughout the film, Cage blesses us with countless bizarre episodes,
07:34but one in particular left us dying. Pardon the pun.
07:44Devastated by his so-called condition,
07:46Peter sluggishly limps throughout the city as he cries out in agony.
07:50The thing is, he doesn't cry as much as he awkwardly moans at the sky,
07:53all the while stumbling between honking cars. It's vintage Nick Cage, all right!
08:07Number 2. Uncle Ben – Spider-Man
08:14This thrilling origin story has arguably the magnum opus of cringeworthy crying scenes.
08:19You know the scene we're talking about. When Peter discovers he was inadvertently
08:22responsible for his Uncle Ben's death, he breaks down over his uncle's dying body.
08:26Peter.
08:29Over here, Uncle Ben.
08:31Tobey Maguire's tears are 100% real in this scene, which, yes, we applaud him for,
08:35but his crying face has been mean to death for a reason.
08:39Between the furrowed brows and quivering lips, it's certainly not the subtlest of performances.
08:44Still, it feels pretty authentic, even if it's a little over the top,
08:47and that's more than we can say for others.
08:49He got the shooter.
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09:06Number 1. Johnny's Meltdown – The Room
09:10Directed by and starring Tommy Wiseau, this cult classic explores the volatile love life of a banker
09:15named Johnny. In light of its shoddy storyline, bizarre dialogue, and Wiseau's hilariously awkward
09:20performance, The Room has garnered a reputation as the Citizen Kane of bad movies.
09:31No scene better depicts Wiseau's delusional attempt at acting than when Johnny erupts over
09:35his girlfriend's affair. We hate to say it, but Wiseau is completely unable to shed fake tears.
09:42Although it's clear his character is supposed to be crying,
09:44all he can muster are a series of random yelps as he trashes his apartment.
09:48Why? Why is this happening to you? Why?
09:53It's over.
09:55Which of these acts were so bad they ruined the intensity of the scene for you?
09:59Let us know in the comments.
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