- 4 months ago
Wait With Me - Full Movie
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00:30It's not porn, it is best selling entertainment.
00:01:00It's not porn, it's not porn.
00:01:30It's not porn, it's not porn.
00:02:00It's not porn, it's not porn.
00:02:02It's not porn.
00:02:03writer maybe you've read one of my books oh what's your name i write under the pen name mercedes lee
00:02:09love letter is it christian romance no is it amish oh how i love those amish novels definitely not
00:02:18amish are you writing now yes may i see i'm afraid i don't let anyone see my work in progress
00:02:27needs an editor's touch oh you were in here yesterday too right and the day before
00:02:36okay what's the problem did management send you in here oh no no i i'm just the baker
00:02:44betty the baker you do the cookies yes i make the cookies the scones holy cow those scones are
00:02:51delicious do you really think so oh yes have you tried the danishes i haven't seen the danishes
00:02:58i usually get here around 10 they must be gone by 10. oh well that's a good sign
00:03:03i think so too good for you betty well how many days have you been in here is there something
00:03:10terribly wrong with your car i bet they could get you a rental actually i'm not really a writer betty
00:03:19can you keep a secret i'm here with corporate we've been worried about the service in this
00:03:24branch so they sent me here to scope things out for a few weeks well i'd never heard any complaints
00:03:29before but you wouldn't it's all very internal but i'm gonna need you to keep my presence here quiet
00:03:36that's okay mom's the word thank you for your discretion we aren't worried about you at all
00:03:53i don't need an oil change yes but you're my friend and you'll do anything for me
00:04:08i need your car so i don't blow my cover i lied to an old lady i'm in deep this is so desperate it
00:04:17doesn't matter what matters is that i've got my writing mojo back and i'm not giving it up
00:04:21please why don't you just find a back entrance instead of borrowing every neighbor's car
00:04:32you never thought of that this deadline has me freaked out okay no whatever wait you don't need my car
00:04:51so
00:05:02so
00:05:12I don't know.
00:05:42I don't know.
00:05:47Shit!
00:05:50Are you okay?
00:05:51Oh my god, my computer.
00:05:58Okay, it's not cracked, but will it boot?
00:06:00Oh, rookie mistake.
00:06:02This is what I get for not backing it up.
00:06:05Oh, okay.
00:06:08Whew.
00:06:11Hey.
00:06:15Are you hurt?
00:06:23Huh?
00:06:24You, uh, you work here?
00:06:37I do.
00:06:39I'm a mechanic.
00:06:41Are you getting a service?
00:06:46Yes.
00:06:47Then what brings you back here?
00:06:49Completed cars are out front.
00:06:51These back doors are the employee entrance.
00:06:54Right.
00:06:55I, um, was coming out for a smoke.
00:06:58Great.
00:06:59Can I bum one?
00:07:01Weren't you just fake-smoking licorice?
00:07:04You saw that?
00:07:05Yes.
00:07:06Before my triumphant fall, I saw something that looked like a make-believe cloud of cherry smoke floating all around you.
00:07:15I quit smoking three months ago.
00:07:18Licorice helps.
00:07:19Doesn't hurt.
00:07:20Maybe it hurts the ego.
00:07:22How macho is it to fake smoke candy?
00:07:25My ego is never in danger, babe.
00:07:28Well, with book boyfriend arms like that, it's no wonder.
00:07:32Book boyfriend?
00:07:34Book boyfriend.
00:07:35The leading man in a romance novel that readers claim ownership of because he doesn't likely exist in the real world.
00:07:42Basically, the ideal man.
00:07:44I haven't heard of that before.
00:07:46I take it you're into books or something?
00:07:49Or something.
00:07:51And it doesn't surprise me you've never heard of it.
00:07:57You're not my demo.
00:08:06What if you're my demo?
00:08:08Well, we won't know that until the end.
00:08:21Fessa, where have you been?
00:08:24The library, like I told you in my text.
00:08:28Bullshit.
00:08:31You smell like coffee and rubber.
00:08:33So known as freedom.
00:08:35You actually went back to the tire depot.
00:08:38Kate, come on, they are going to call the cops on you.
00:08:41For what?
00:08:42Stealing complimentary coffee and cookies?
00:08:44Come on.
00:08:45That's not a thing.
00:08:46But loitering is.
00:08:48You think they'd really do that?
00:08:50Anyway, I found a back entrance.
00:08:54No more barbering cars.
00:08:56Oh, that's even better.
00:08:57Skulking in and out of side entrances.
00:09:00Brilliant.
00:09:01I don't care, Lindsay.
00:09:02I found my words at the TD.
00:09:04And I'm not letting go until I'm done.
00:09:05The TD?
00:09:06Tiger depot.
00:09:07It's such a mouthful.
00:09:09You know what's a mouthful?
00:09:11Risen.
00:09:12This is a crutch, Kate.
00:09:14You've got to see that.
00:09:15Who cares?
00:09:16I couldn't write a thing before I went there.
00:09:18And writing is what keeps me in this posh townhouse
00:09:21on the outskirts of beautiful Boulder.
00:09:23If I want to continue being this stunning creature
00:09:25living the high life, I have to follow the vibe.
00:09:27And the vibe is strong at tire depot.
00:09:30Can we stop dancing around what's really going on here?
00:09:33Watch yourself.
00:09:34That is luxury reclaimed barn wood.
00:09:37This is about your ex?
00:09:40Who happens to still live with you?
00:09:42He's gone for the summer.
00:09:45That is hardly living together.
00:09:47And as soon as he gets back, I'm not budging.
00:09:49We're playing this game of chicken,
00:09:51and there's no way I'm letting that entitled fucker
00:09:53take this house.
00:09:54So even though you can't write in it,
00:09:56you want to fight for the house with no vibe?
00:09:59That's irrelevant.
00:10:00There's no way in hell I'm moving.
00:10:02I have to write a follow-up bestseller.
00:10:04That is no small feat.
00:10:06I live next door to my best friend.
00:10:09You don't want me to move out, do you?
00:10:11No.
00:10:13What?
00:10:14It looks like a letter from tire depot.
00:10:16They figured it out?
00:10:18Stop being so dramatic.
00:10:19Have they ever mailed you something before?
00:10:21No.
00:10:22Oh my God.
00:10:23What if this is the moment I feared?
00:10:24They might be taking my mojo away.
00:10:26Dear Miss Smith, we have taken notice of your enjoyment
00:10:29of our customer waiting area.
00:10:31Read it.
00:10:33An invoice for refreshments?
00:10:36Holy shit!
00:10:38What?
00:10:39How do they know?
00:10:40What?
00:10:41$180 for lattes and cookies.
00:10:42Kate, how many did you eat?
00:10:44I don't eat lunch!
00:10:48Wait a damn minute.
00:10:49What?
00:10:50This has danishes here.
00:10:51Okay.
00:10:52I have never had a danish there in my life.
00:10:54You haven't.
00:10:55I'm being punked.
00:11:00Dean.
00:11:01Dean.
00:11:02Okay.
00:11:03Here's a plan.
00:11:04I'm gonna kneel here.
00:11:05You knock on the door.
00:11:06When he opens it, jump punch.
00:11:07Kate!
00:11:08What if he didn't do it?
00:11:09I mean, that's so extreme.
00:11:10Surely he has a punch to the ballsack coming for something.
00:11:11He's a mountain man whore.
00:11:12They always have it coming.
00:11:13Ugh.
00:11:14Why are you so mature?
00:11:15Mmhmm.
00:11:16Mmhmm.
00:11:17You're a dick.
00:11:18And I know that fake invoice was from you.
00:11:19Ugh.
00:11:20Nice to see you too, Kate.
00:11:21Just be grateful.
00:11:22She didn't junk punch you.
00:11:23Mmhmm.
00:11:24I saved you from that.
00:11:25Thanks, Linz.
00:11:26Mmhmm.
00:11:27How'd you know it was me?
00:11:28The letterhead was too perfect.
00:11:29And I know you know how to use Photoshop.
00:11:30You should try to suck more.
00:11:31Oh, that is the first time I've heard that.
00:11:32You should have seen her, Dane.
00:11:33That's so funny.
00:11:34I know you're a dick.
00:11:35I know that fake invoice was from you.
00:11:36Ugh.
00:11:37Ugh.
00:11:38Nice to see you too, Kate.
00:11:41Just be grateful she didn't junk punch you.
00:11:43Mmhmm.
00:11:44I saved you from that.
00:11:45Thanks, Linz.
00:11:46Mmhmm.
00:11:47How'd you know it was me?
00:11:49The letterhead was too perfect.
00:11:51And I know you know how to use Photoshop.
00:11:54You should try to suck more.
00:11:56Oh, that is the first time I've heard that.
00:11:59You should have seen her, Dane.
00:12:01I thought she was going to start crying when she saw that letterhead.
00:12:03Look, I tried to get you to come check out my co-working space.
00:12:06We've got coffee and donuts there too, you know?
00:12:08Eh, those aren't my people.
00:12:10Not my vibe.
00:12:12And your vibe is this tire shop.
00:12:15You gotta see it to believe it, man.
00:12:17If you find your vibe somewhere, you have to fight for it.
00:12:21Tire Depot is to me what Fanny Braun was to John Keats.
00:12:26Poetry in motion, man.
00:12:28Okay, you sound like a lunatic.
00:12:30What if you could work better and faster elsewhere?
00:12:34You'd have more time to hike, bang chicks, prank your friends,
00:12:39buy more plaid trousers.
00:12:41Oh, you been noticing my slacks, Kate?
00:12:43No, and don't change the subject.
00:12:46I feel like a fucking champion when I'm blasting out words
00:12:50and sitting next to some gal who's wasting her life on social media.
00:12:53It's a real morale boost for Mercedes Lee Love Letter.
00:12:57And I still can't believe you hit a bestseller list with that pen name.
00:13:00My readers get me.
00:13:02They'd have to.
00:13:04So you're going back there tomorrow?
00:13:05Hells yeah.
00:13:06The smell won't write itself.
00:13:08I have two large pizzas, parmesan breadsticks, a pound of boneless wings, and three dipping sauces.
00:13:17Mercedes Lee Love Letter.
00:13:18I have two large pizzas, parmesan breadsticks, a pound of boneless wings, and three dipping sauces.
00:13:28Claim it now or it's going in the trash.
00:13:41I'm Mercedes.
00:13:42I've been calling your name for like five minutes.
00:13:45Well, I didn't order a pizza.
00:13:47I don't care.
00:13:55Fucking whore.
00:13:57I'm trying to keep a low profile.
00:14:02Everyone is staring at me.
00:14:06I'm fucking mortified.
00:14:08Laughing so fucking hard.
00:14:11You interrupted my anal scene.
00:14:14I was in the zone.
00:14:16Wheezing on the floor.
00:14:19How do you have time for this?
00:14:22Don't you have a book to write?
00:14:24Oh, best 53 bucks I ever spent.
00:14:29You're back.
00:14:30I had an issue with one of my tires.
00:14:34Which car?
00:14:35I drive the Cadillac SRX.
00:14:39A Cadillac?
00:14:40Isn't that kind of an old lady car?
00:14:44Isn't that kind of an old lady car?
00:14:45It is not an old lady car.
00:14:46It is a luxury SUV and it is wonderful.
00:14:49Well, if you have that kind of money, you should look into a Lexus or a BMW.
00:14:50Much more sexy feel to the bottom of my car.
00:14:51It is a luxury SUV and it is wonderful.
00:14:52Well, if you have that kind of money, you should look into a Lexus or a BMW.
00:14:53Much more sexy feel to the body.
00:14:55Maybe I don't want a sexy body feel.
00:14:58Sure, I should have a lot of different cars, too.
00:15:01You should get too much.
00:15:02What is that?
00:15:03Oh.
00:15:04I had an issue with one of my tires.
00:15:05Which car?
00:15:06I drive the Cadillac SRX.
00:15:08A Cadillac?
00:15:09Isn't that kind of an old lady car?
00:15:10It is not an old lady car.
00:15:11It is a luxury SUV and it is wonderful.
00:15:14Well, if you have that kind of money, you should look into a Lexus or a BMW.
00:15:18Much more sexy feel to the body.
00:15:20well maybe I don't want a sexy body feel what's your name my name is Mercedes
00:15:28that's perfect you'd look damn fine in a Mercedes what do you drive an Indian
00:15:36motorcycle why am I not surprised am I that predictable more predictable than
00:15:41my old lady car well it's nice to officially meet you Mercedes I'm miles
00:15:49Hudson now tell me why you're really here would some leftover pizza keep you
00:15:59quiet I might buy you some time time is all I need you're serious super serious
00:16:07very well Mercedes I'll leave you be for now see you around the water cooler miles
00:16:19you haven't noticed that hot redhead in the comfort center have you
00:16:29nope was she there today yeah and yesterday what was she doing just on her computer
00:16:41so she's safe any free Wi-Fi call the cops we got a mooch on her hands I don't get a mooch vibe
00:16:49from her mostly feels like desperation now it all makes sense you have a fetish for desperate girls
00:17:00bro I do not yes you do you like to save them be the gown protector sweeps in guards them
00:17:08this girl does not need saving so she's nothing like Jocelyn dude I'm done with Joss can we please
00:17:18stop talking about you got dumped by your longtime sweetheart for some rich ugly prick that shit
00:17:26sticks with you forever what a sausage fest why do we live here again because my uncle's the manager
00:17:34and no other boss would put up with our shit and maybe that oh definitely that
00:18:04hey Justin I'm gonna close up tonight okay
00:18:14hey Red
00:18:31Mercedes
00:18:37shit did I bust out yeah have you fainted before only when I don't eat why didn't you have a cookie or
00:18:52something I feel bad eating all the cookies Betty worked so hard on them it's bad enough that I drink all the coffee what's wrong no one
00:19:07ever tells her how good those cookies are I got here early so that I could try her danishes and they were already gone how crazy is that
00:19:18Betty has to get up so early to make them fresh every day and then people just gobble them up in seconds I wonder if anyone appreciates her in her life do you know she's married
00:19:34she's married all the siblings like that baby she's married and she's married to her and she didn't speak her in her life's married to her and she's like when she's married to her and her mother and then she can't give her
00:19:40really really that's really sweet I'm sorry I get emotional when I'm hungry you know how some
00:19:51people get hangry I get among rey emotional and hungry it's a thing I got them to add it to urban
00:19:57dictionary well let's get you something to eat then like pizza not cookies I love pizza I know
00:20:05I saw your shirt the other day with the pizza I love that shirt oh my god I am probably bugging
00:20:18you oh you're not please I practically just fainted in your arms we could not get any more book worthy
00:20:27if we tried Mercedes this isn't the first time I've had a girl faint at the side of me
00:20:31just feed me before you start reciting any more cheesy romance novel lines
00:20:42I had to kill a guy for these I hope you didn't get blood on them
00:21:01Jesus now what oh come on there was nothing sexy about that I just stuffed my face with a breadstick
00:21:11so what are you so busy doing every day that you forget to eat
00:21:19all I can say is that I was in the zone
00:21:22you need to drink water on a day that you didn't faint to my arms you could have a beer first
00:21:29but please for my own sanity will you drink some water first
00:21:33thank you
00:21:45now tell me what you're doing every day think of this as a safe space nothing will be held against you
00:21:55and you've been doing this for over three weeks now basically but why won't you tell me what
00:22:05you're writing because it weirds people out I won't judge you'll judge well if you tell me you're
00:22:13writing the next game of thrones we'll basically have to get married and live happily ever after
00:22:17it's not the next game of thrones but thank you for the most romantic proposal I've ever received
00:22:24you get a lot of proposals
00:22:26yeah
00:22:28only from guys with issues
00:22:31I don't have issues
00:22:33where were you born
00:22:36Utah
00:22:38what brought you here
00:22:41tech school
00:22:43did you know anyone when you moved out here
00:22:46I followed this girl
00:22:48what was she like
00:22:52I don't want to talk about her
00:22:53oh yikes
00:22:55did I just stumble on a sore spot say the word and I'll stop
00:22:58word
00:22:59got it
00:22:59no ex-girlfriend talk
00:23:00I mean I'm over her but I just don't like to think about her
00:23:06I totally get it
00:23:08douchebag ex-boyfriend over here
00:23:10so what do you do when you're not working
00:23:18I like to ride my motorcycle
00:23:22hike
00:23:23read
00:23:25occasionally I go to the lake
00:23:27cool
00:23:28well I'll make sure to go shopping for my Harley this weekend
00:23:31you do that
00:23:33come on
00:23:35let's get you back to the shop before I start boring you with why you should get an Indian
00:23:39instead of a Harley
00:23:40mechanic talk
00:23:42sounds kinky
00:23:44okay
00:23:47okay
00:23:51well
00:23:56obviously
00:23:57I'mλε
00:23:57okay
00:23:57I'm
00:23:58there
00:23:59here
00:24:03I'll kick this
00:24:06open
00:24:06this
00:24:08okay
00:24:09okay
00:24:09great
00:24:10Sex appeal isn't created in a fancy gym with weights and treadmills.
00:24:24It's born in powerful grungy garages where men, real fucking men, work with their hands.
00:24:40But they get so dirty they have to use special manly soap to clean themselves up.
00:24:47You can't find that shit at Bath and Body Shop.
00:24:51This is pure fucking testosterone.
00:24:59Billionaire romance is out.
00:25:03Mechanic romance is in.
00:25:08It's so very in.
00:25:38Another week of work down.
00:25:43You look hyper focused.
00:25:45Yeah.
00:25:46I got a new book idea today.
00:25:52Any big plans for the weekend?
00:25:57My buddy and I might go to the Golden Gate Park tomorrow.
00:25:59We try to camp and hit this great hiking trail there every summer.
00:26:01Sounds fun.
00:26:02Super masculine.
00:26:03What about you?
00:26:04Oh, I will probably do some more writing.
00:26:06Sounds exciting.
00:26:08Oh it is.
00:26:09Well, you have a good weekend.
00:26:11I have no idea why I just kissed you on the cheek.
00:26:18That was really inappropriate.
00:26:19No worries here.
00:26:20Endless dirty thoughts live rent free in my mind.
00:26:25I swear I'm usually a lot smoother than this.
00:26:26Don't worry.
00:26:27Your book boyfriend status is still very much secure.
00:26:30See you Monday, Mercedes.
00:26:31See you at the coffee machine.
00:26:32See you at the coffee machine.
00:26:33See you at the coffee machine.
00:26:34I have no idea why I just kissed you on the cheek.
00:26:39That was really inappropriate.
00:26:40No worries here.
00:26:41Endless dirty thoughts live rent free in my mind.
00:26:46I swear I'm usually a lot smoother than this.
00:26:48Don't worry.
00:26:49Your book boyfriend status is still very much secure.
00:26:53See you Monday, Mercedes.
00:26:56See you at the coffee machine.
00:26:58Cheers, buddy.
00:27:07Cheers.
00:27:08What are you waiting for, bro?
00:27:13She tells you she has dirty thoughts and you don't think, yeah, I'm gonna tap her.
00:27:19Nah, she's too cool for a random hookup.
00:27:22Then I'd have to see her every day in the comfort center.
00:27:24It would be awkward.
00:27:26Wait, you just don't go in there anymore after you bang her.
00:27:29Boom, problem solved.
00:27:31Two.
00:27:32I like seeing her.
00:27:34Oh my gosh, thank you.
00:27:39Is that that same redhead?
00:27:47Yeah.
00:27:48Ooh.
00:27:52I'll visit you in jail.
00:27:53What?
00:27:54Yeah, when you get arrested for killing that guy, I will visit you in jail.
00:28:00Dude, I thought you were just friends with this girl.
00:28:04I am.
00:28:05Wouldn't fucking cool it, bro.
00:28:09Hey, Miles.
00:28:10Hey, Mercedes.
00:28:11Fancy seeing you here.
00:28:14Thought you were going camping.
00:28:16I thought you were riding.
00:28:19Girl needs a break sometimes.
00:28:21I'll find a coffee shop tomorrow.
00:28:24This is my buddy, Sam.
00:28:27Hey.
00:28:28Nice to meet you.
00:28:29Hi.
00:28:30Mercedes.
00:28:31Right.
00:28:32Mercedes.
00:28:33Well, I will...
00:28:34Can I buy you a drink?
00:28:35Drink sounds good.
00:28:36Uh, here.
00:28:37Take my spot.
00:28:38I'm going to go say hi to a friend.
00:28:39He's the DJ tonight.
00:28:40Thanks.
00:28:41Nice to meet you.
00:28:42Yeah, you too.
00:28:43What's your poison?
00:28:46Mmm.
00:28:47Mmm.
00:28:48Mmm.
00:28:49Miles.
00:28:50Mercedes.
00:28:51Why haven't you asked me to hang out again since we had pizza together?
00:28:53Tire Depot seems safer.
00:28:54No.
00:28:55No.
00:28:56No.
00:28:57No.
00:28:58No.
00:28:59No.
00:29:00No.
00:29:01No.
00:29:02No.
00:29:03No.
00:29:04No.
00:29:05No.
00:29:06No.
00:29:07No.
00:29:08No.
00:29:09No.
00:29:10No.
00:29:11No.
00:29:12No.
00:29:13No.
00:29:14Tire Depot seems safer.
00:29:16Safer.
00:29:19Meaning that I won't run into you and break my computer again?
00:29:23Something like that.
00:29:26So what are your plans really tonight?
00:29:29You just hanging out with Sam or are you guys on the hunt?
00:29:32On the hunt?
00:29:34For tail.
00:29:37A one-night stand that gets really awkward in the morning because she wants to make you pancakes,
00:29:41but you would rather chew your arm off and sneak out before she wakes up.
00:29:46Something like that.
00:29:48I could tell that about you.
00:29:50How?
00:29:52It's my business.
00:29:57So, what's your type?
00:29:59Who draws your eye?
00:30:00What are we working with here?
00:30:01I don't know.
00:30:06Brunettes, I guess?
00:30:09My ex was a blonde.
00:30:10No more blondes.
00:30:11Brunettes it is.
00:30:13Let's see.
00:30:16Not my friend Lindsay.
00:30:18She already dated my friend Dean and it was so awkward for months after.
00:30:24What about her?
00:30:26Nah, I try to avoid packs.
00:30:29There's always one friend who cock blocks,
00:30:31one friend who tries to steal the guy,
00:30:33and one friend who slut shames the other two.
00:30:35Man.
00:30:37Or else can be mean.
00:30:39You're telling me.
00:30:42What about you?
00:30:44Why aren't you on the hunt?
00:30:46You said you're over your ex, right?
00:30:48Oh, I totally am.
00:30:50He is vile.
00:30:51And your friend Dean isn't a prospect?
00:30:53No way.
00:30:56He is my neighbor.
00:30:58And he reminds me of my brother.
00:31:00Uh-huh.
00:31:02You know what?
00:31:03You're right, Miles.
00:31:05I should totally find a random hookup tonight.
00:31:08Well, I never said anything about random.
00:31:09Well, you're doing it, so why can't I?
00:31:12You don't seem like the random type.
00:31:14Well, maybe I should be.
00:31:15Maybe I should be.
00:31:28Can I tell you a secret, Miles?
00:31:32You can tell me anything, Mercedes.
00:31:34My writing makes me horny.
00:31:41I'm sorry, what?
00:31:43I'm serious.
00:31:45I have a sex toy that works really fast and really well,
00:31:49but sometimes I just miss the heat of a man, you know?
00:31:53Not really.
00:31:55I'm the heat of a woman.
00:31:58You know what I'm talking about?
00:32:00The heat.
00:32:02You might have to elaborate with great detail.
00:32:06You asked for it.
00:32:08The heat of a woman is so much more than temperature.
00:32:15It's her soft, sensual curves.
00:32:20The way that your fingers dig into the meat of her thighs
00:32:23when she's wrapped around you.
00:32:25The delicate little bumps on her ribcage
00:32:28when she's throwing her head back in pleasure.
00:32:31Tight little nipples and pillows of creamy softness.
00:32:35The fact that you could fold your body around her
00:32:40and envelop her almost entirely
00:32:43and still want more.
00:32:49That kind of heat.
00:32:54You're totally right, Veronica.
00:33:00Damn it.
00:33:01I didn't want you to know.
00:33:03Why not?
00:33:05What's the big secret?
00:33:07Because it'll change the way that you look at me.
00:33:09How so?
00:33:11You'll either think that I'm some kind of sex freak
00:33:14or you'll be embarrassed by what I do and not want to tell anyone.
00:33:18Are you joking?
00:33:20Well, your buddy doesn't count. He's probably a hornball.
00:33:23I mean anyone that is important to you.
00:33:25It's a big reason why my ex and I broke up.
00:33:30He asked me to lie to his family about what I did for a living.
00:33:33What a fucker.
00:33:35Yes.
00:33:37But I write some really kinky shit.
00:33:39It's not exactly easy to tell your grandma about.
00:33:42I would tell my grandma about you.
00:33:44You would not.
00:33:46I fucking would.
00:33:47Grandmas hate me.
00:33:49My grandma hates me.
00:33:50She's really religious and every time that I come home,
00:33:53she tries to arrange for a meeting with me and her priest.
00:33:56She thinks that I need an intervention or an exorcism or something.
00:33:59I'm sorry, that's not funny.
00:34:02It's kind of funny.
00:34:07Come with me.
00:34:13Where are we going?
00:34:14Calling my grandma.
00:34:15No, Miles, are you insane?
00:34:16It's after midnight.
00:34:17She loves me.
00:34:18I'm her favorite.
00:34:20Okay, okay.
00:34:21We'll call my sister.
00:34:22Miles, what are you doing?
00:34:24Too late.
00:34:25Hello?
00:34:29Meg?
00:34:31I want to ask you a question.
00:34:33Why is it so loud?
00:34:35Miles, how is it possible for you to call for me from 500 miles away?
00:34:39Big brother intuition.
00:34:41Just ask your question.
00:34:42Okay, so I met this girl.
00:34:44She's super fucking hot.
00:34:46Grumps, Miles.
00:34:47Sorry, okay.
00:34:48So she writes sexy books, like that's her job.
00:34:51Dirty, kinky shit, I think.
00:34:52And she was saying that grandmothers hated her.
00:34:55And I said our grandma would be totally into it.
00:34:57True or false?
00:34:59Duh, Grams is a freak.
00:35:00Totally true.
00:35:06So, who is this girl?
00:35:09I want to read her stuff.
00:35:10I'll find out.
00:35:12But I'll call you back, mate.
00:35:14Don't fuck that dude tonight.
00:35:19What happened?
00:35:20What did I say?
00:35:21I don't know.
00:35:22I don't know.
00:35:23I just kissed you, I guess.
00:35:24Yes.
00:35:25You did.
00:35:26And as hot as that was, we have to stop.
00:35:28Right.
00:35:29We're in public.
00:35:30I like you, Mercedes, but...
00:35:31I don't know.
00:35:32I just kissed you, I guess.
00:35:33Yes.
00:35:34You did.
00:35:35And as hot as that was, we have to stop.
00:35:36Right.
00:35:37We're in public.
00:35:38I like you, Mercedes.
00:35:39I like you, Mercedes, but I'm not in the position to like someone right now.
00:35:53Wait, what?
00:35:54After everything that you just said with your sister?
00:35:58Got it.
00:35:59Well, I'm sorry to put you through such a difficult situation.
00:36:04Mercedes, wait.
00:36:05I don't want things to be weird.
00:36:06Well, you shouldn't have flirted with me then.
00:36:07See you around, Miles.
00:36:08My God!
00:36:09Why are you here?
00:36:11Why aren't you Guys of a fulljeran...
00:36:13hello!
00:36:14Okay, thanks, my friend.
00:36:20Hi.
00:36:27Why are you here?
00:36:28Oh my God!
00:36:29Why in a sense?
00:36:34What is that horrible smell?
00:36:37nothing wait wait is that a tire-scented candle no don't stop on my account burnt rubber-scented
00:37:00soy candle i can't believe this is a thing jesus h you got it bad kate i know can't write a damn word
00:37:09and all i want to do is go back to tire depot then go so you kissed him and he turns you down big deal
00:37:17what are you in the seventh grade go back to the tire depot she has a point kate it'll be awkward
00:37:22for a day three tops he'll probably stay in the garage and ignore you you're right
00:37:27my house smells like shit now too
00:37:34fine i'll go back but only because burnt rubber is not the same as new rubber
00:37:57how's the book coming
00:38:18how's the book coming coming along
00:38:30this is the point in the story where i ripped the couple apart and ruin everything they thought they
00:38:35knew about each other ouch can't they just be happy what's dramatic about happy
00:38:42my readers like the pain the torture makes them make up sex that much better
00:38:52you know my sister texted me she asked for your full author name so she could look you up
00:38:56really i warned you we are a family full of readers
00:39:05you're gonna laugh i was drunk when i came up with it my full pen name is mercedes lee love letter
00:39:15what's your real last name it's smith
00:39:26also i write a lot of bdsm
00:39:34so does this mean we don't have to be awkward
00:39:35yeah friends good because as a friend i was wondering if you might be able to help me with
00:39:44some research for my next book what did you have in mind you're gonna throw your leg over but don't
00:39:51let your ankles touch this area here got it
00:39:53it'll make me feel better if you wear it it'll protect you a little
00:40:09okay get on
00:40:23okay are you ready ready
00:40:27whoo
00:40:30ta-ra-ra-ra-boom-dee-ay
00:40:33chica-chica-chica-chica-boom-dee-ay
00:40:34ta-ra-ra-ra-ra-boom-dee-ay
00:40:37chica-chica-chica-chica-chica-boom
00:40:48boom
00:41:18excited this thing
00:41:19your ex is a deal
00:41:22i mean i understand that motorcycles are dangerous but the danger is what makes it exciting
00:41:26you took the words right out of my mouth
00:41:29unfortunately my ex liked a different kind of danger
00:41:34do you want to tell me what you mean by that or do you want to say word again
00:41:37my ex loved the cheating kind of danger yikes
00:41:43it wasn't just one guy that's the hardest part how you can bald face lie to someone you care
00:41:51about that's not the fun kind of danger for me not at all i'm so sorry it's fine i blame myself
00:42:02for not walking away sooner she made me a jealous head case with baggage for days yeah jealousy is
00:42:11the worst although i will tell you from a writer's standpoint readers love a possessive man is that
00:42:19right so i should be thanking my ex for making me a possessive asshole god no she sounds like too much
00:42:25of an asshole to get any credit for the man you are today well your ex sounded like an asshole too
00:42:32i still can't believe he made you lie about your job to his family right why did we ever date them i ask
00:42:39myself that all the time i guess you could say that if we didn't go through all that then we might not
00:42:50be here enjoying this awesome view you're missing something really beautiful no i'm not
00:43:02i can't figure you out myles i can't figure me out either
00:43:10how's it gone
00:43:22no way you just finished i just finished
00:43:29congratulations mercedes
00:43:33couldn't have done it without you miles we should celebrate buy you a drink actually i'm having a
00:43:40little the end party at my house on friday i want to come by i'd love to great
00:43:46don't forget to call me mercedes tonight
00:44:02mercedes is doing a keg stand to celebrate finishing her book
00:44:06what no way mercedes is not doing a keg stand because he made me buy that shitty ipa mercedes
00:44:12likes light beer and complimentary coffee and riding sex parks yeah
00:44:19and hard and fast waltz
00:44:23and a formal scene where a guy takes off a girl's panties and fingers them in his tuxedo pocket all night long
00:44:29that was really specific miles
00:44:41i'm gonna go get a drink
00:44:46uh i'm gonna follow that guy
00:44:50i'm lindsay best friend and neighbor there's my tiki bar over there can i get you something to drink
00:44:58i'm miles thanks i'm good for now okay i'm gonna follow those guys bye
00:45:07can we go somewhere and talk
00:45:11sure
00:45:24you have a roommate
00:45:24kind of so it's a guy yes
00:45:35figures it's not that dean guy right you said he's your neighbor he is my neighbor it's not dean
00:45:43then who is it no one
00:45:45i'm sorry i should just go my roommate uh is gay
00:45:55seriously
00:45:58and he's out of town for the summer so
00:46:00he's out of town for the summer so
00:46:03why are you acting like this i thought you only wanted to be friends
00:46:15it's a lot harder than i thought it would be
00:46:16what can i do to help
00:46:29i'm overprotective i'm overbearing arrogant okay pretty much everything i do is in the extreme
00:46:35i try not to be jealous i do she i'm not her i know you're not her
00:46:39i just really need you to not do things to make me jealous
00:46:45why
00:46:47because it'll make me want to you so you don't ever want to look at another guy again
00:46:51prove it
00:46:58i hope you know what you're asking for red
00:47:13you're not getting these back
00:47:43jesus
00:47:46fuck how are you real
00:47:57oh
00:48:13I'm a dirty girl, Mercedes.
00:48:26Oh, yes.
00:48:29I feel rough hands on my body.
00:48:33See how hot we look together.
00:48:39I had to talk to you through what you did the other night.
00:48:43I love when you put your finger in my mouth like that.
00:48:50Oh, God.
00:48:58Mercedes.
00:49:14Shirt thief.
00:49:29I've been looking for this shirt for ten minutes.
00:49:31Are you in a pancake mood, or cut your arm off and run with?
00:49:39I could eat.
00:49:41Go sit down.
00:49:42I feel like I need to tell you that I didn't come here last night to do that.
00:50:03Okay.
00:50:07I mean, don't get me wrong, it was really good.
00:50:11Fucking great, actually.
00:50:12It was, wasn't it?
00:50:13But I just want you to know that wasn't my plan.
00:50:18Is this the part where you tell me that you're not in a position to like someone again?
00:50:21Maybe.
00:50:25It's fine.
00:50:28It is?
00:50:31This is no big deal, Miles.
00:50:33We had sex.
00:50:35You didn't ask me to go study.
00:50:37I'm not getting this twisted up.
00:50:39So you're good with this, just being casual?
00:50:46Yeah.
00:50:48I'm a workaholic, so it's not like I have time to devote to a boyfriend.
00:50:54Though I might need your help with some book research.
00:51:00Book research?
00:51:01I thought you were done.
00:51:03Oh, how little you know about writing.
00:51:06Tire Depot was the easy stuff.
00:51:09I want help with the bedroom stuff.
00:51:13You write erotic novels.
00:51:15What more could you need to know?
00:51:18Okay.
00:51:19So for my new book, I want to write from a dual point of view.
00:51:23So one chapter will be in the female voice,
00:51:26and the next chapter will be in the male voice,
00:51:28and I'll alternate between the two.
00:51:30I know what dual point of view is, Mercedes.
00:51:33Okay.
00:51:33Sorry.
00:51:34So, I'm going to need your help getting into the mind of a man.
00:51:43Should we start now?
00:51:44I'd hate to see your education suffer.
00:51:50Actually, since we're sticking with this whole friends with benefits thing,
00:51:53I was wondering if you could help me with a little project first.
00:51:59Like a naked kind of project?
00:52:02I mean, you can be naked if you want to, but it might not be safe.
00:52:06Could you help me move my roommate's shit downstairs and into a moving pod?
00:52:16Absolutely.
00:52:18Friends have to earn their benefits sometimes.
00:52:20Thanks.
00:52:24Oh my god.
00:52:25Hannah.
00:52:26I have entered into a casual friends with benefits situation
00:52:29with a mechanic from Tire Depot who thinks my name is Mercedes.
00:52:33Wait, this is actually happening to you?
00:52:35Like in real life?
00:52:35Yes!
00:52:36And I like him way more than just a friend.
00:52:38So I'm in crisis mode.
00:52:40What do I do?
00:52:41Besides phone him every chance you get?
00:52:43Yeah, I mean, my alter ego's taking the reins here.
00:52:46I fully understand.
00:52:47And I've kind of been avoiding him this week to sort of play cool
00:52:50so that he doesn't know that I like him.
00:52:52Which you do.
00:52:53Yes, but I don't want him to know that.
00:52:55I mean, is this relationship worth me telling him my real name?
00:52:58Or is it just sex?
00:52:59Are you done?
00:53:00I could use some sage advice here.
00:53:02Listen to me.
00:53:04Here's what you're going to do.
00:53:05You are going to go camping.
00:53:08Camping?
00:53:09Camping.
00:53:11Why?
00:53:12Kate, outdoorsy guys, love that shit.
00:53:14Just tell him it's for book research and you need his help.
00:53:16Ooh, that's good because I actually used that excuse.
00:53:19Perfect.
00:53:20You're going to be adorable and fumbling
00:53:22and not know how to cast a fishing pole
00:53:25and he's going to realize how much fun it is
00:53:27to go camping and get to fuck in a tent.
00:53:29By the end of the trip, you'll know if you need to fish or cut bait.
00:53:32Hmm.
00:53:33You should be a writer.
00:53:34Oh.
00:53:35Hannah, this is good.
00:53:36You're a genius.
00:53:37I'm going camping.
00:53:38Just let me know where I have the pizza delivered to.
00:53:41Ha-ha, bish.
00:53:42Hey, Kate.
00:53:43You here for a cronut?
00:53:44You know it.
00:53:45It's going to be a hot minute before the new badge is ready,
00:53:47but go ahead and take a number and we'll bring them right out.
00:53:49I'll take two and a cup of coffee.
00:53:51You got it.
00:53:56My dick misses you.
00:53:58Your dick is insatiable.
00:54:00Are you dry-hopping me?
00:54:01Uh-huh.
00:54:03Tell me what you're thinking.
00:54:05I want you naked and in a bed now.
00:54:08How are the words flowing?
00:54:10Not as good as the other night.
00:54:11You are soaking wet.
00:54:16Oh, my God.
00:54:17You're at the bakery?
00:54:19I could think of something else I'd rather be eating.
00:54:21Let me take care of you.
00:54:22OMG, you're filthy.
00:54:28Says the smart writer.
00:54:33Feeling inspired?
00:54:355,000 words in three hours.
00:54:38It's Tire Depot magic right there.
00:54:40Maybe it's Myles Hudson magic.
00:54:50Oh, Jesus!
00:54:52Say hi, Dean.
00:54:53I was literally standing there for almost five minutes.
00:54:57I'm reading my texts.
00:55:00So, what is so important that you had to see me?
00:55:05I don't know what you mean.
00:55:06We do this every week.
00:55:09Yeah.
00:55:10You've never texted me three times the day of
00:55:13to make sure that I was coming.
00:55:15I take cronets very seriously.
00:55:19Dean.
00:55:20I saw his truck outside your place a couple nights ago.
00:55:26Whose truck?
00:55:27Myles.
00:55:28Who else?
00:55:30How do you know it was his truck?
00:55:32Because I don't know any other guys in Boulder
00:55:34who would drive a beastly vehicle like that.
00:55:37Oh, my God.
00:55:38You're such a snob.
00:55:40So, he spent the night?
00:55:42What, did you come back and check in the morning?
00:55:46Maybe.
00:55:48Stop worrying.
00:55:50We're just fooling around.
00:55:52It's nothing serious.
00:55:52See, that is exactly what I'm worried about.
00:55:56The guy rejected you once already.
00:55:58Thank you for reminding me.
00:56:00Any guy that jerks you around like that is an idiot.
00:56:03He's not an idiot.
00:56:04He's a mechanic at a tire depot.
00:56:07How bright can he be?
00:56:08Are you kidding me?
00:56:08Hey, just calm down.
00:56:11Coming from a high school dropout.
00:56:13I got my GED.
00:56:16And I am self-educated.
00:56:18In what?
00:56:19Being an asshat?
00:56:21I surround myself with people who are inclusive and non-judgmental because I have a weird job.
00:56:27I don't want judgy friends in my corner because that would make me a hypocrite.
00:56:33And Miles is so encouraging about what I do.
00:56:36More encouraging than you have ever been.
00:56:38And he's not dumb at all.
00:56:42He's actually really fucking insightful.
00:56:44And you might see that if you quit looking down your nose at people.
00:56:50Don't go, Kate.
00:56:50No, I'm sorry.
00:56:52But if you're going to start acting like this, then I don't see how we can continue to be friends.
00:56:56Kate.
00:57:01I like you.
00:57:03Yeah, well, I liked you too until you started acting like a douche nozzle.
00:57:07No.
00:57:08I mean, I really like you.
00:57:12And I...
00:57:13Oh, shit.
00:57:13I don't think it's something I can ignore anymore.
00:57:16Ian.
00:57:20How long?
00:57:23A couple years.
00:57:25But I was with Lindsay and you were with that douchebag Dryston.
00:57:29Why didn't you tell me?
00:57:31I didn't want to be a rebound.
00:57:33You're hooking up with a guy who still doesn't even know your real name.
00:57:36How do you think that's going to end?
00:57:39He wants it casual, but I want the whole thing.
00:57:42The good, the bad, all of it.
00:57:47I'm sorry, Dean.
00:57:48But I just don't feel the same way.
00:57:55But you are one of my best friends and I don't want to change that.
00:58:02I need you to go.
00:58:04But why?
00:58:05We all have our own little places.
00:58:10And this is my tire depot.
00:58:13Please.
00:58:20I am sorry, Dean.
00:58:31Hey.
00:58:33Who's that?
00:58:34A carburetor.
00:58:38What does it do?
00:58:41Um, kind of a lot.
00:58:43Do you really want to know?
00:58:45Yes.
00:58:47Well, it mixes the proper ratio of gas and air inside of an engine for combustion to occur.
00:58:53Nowadays, most cars have fuel injectors, but the classics still run on these puppies.
00:58:59Interesting.
00:59:00It's kind of like how a candle needs oxygen to burn.
00:59:05Combustion of an engine can't take place without the air the carburetor brings in.
00:59:10Kind of like how an orgasm can't be achieved without friction.
00:59:21Sure.
00:59:22You could draw that parallel.
00:59:24Well, I would like to draw that parallel as soon.
00:59:29Did you have something in mind?
00:59:30Watch your step up here.
00:59:39Smells so good.
00:59:41Miles, this is perfect.
00:59:42I didn't know girls could be this excited about camping.
00:59:46Well, don't judge a book by its cover, mister.
00:59:48Look, there's a path that leads right to the water.
00:59:53Perfect.
00:59:54Come on.
00:59:55We got work to do.
00:59:57Got to set up camp.
01:00:10This looks brand new.
01:00:12Yeah.
01:00:12I just do a sleeping bag, usually.
01:00:15So you bought this for me?
01:00:16It's not only for you.
01:00:19This will save my knees big time.
01:00:23You are such a horny bastard.
01:00:25Says the smut writer.
01:00:26Mm-hmm.
01:00:37Seriously.
01:00:39Seriously.
01:00:41Take your shorts off.
01:00:46I figured you were thirsty.
01:00:51We've earned these.
01:00:53Yeah, camping is hard.
01:00:54Mountain air suits you.
01:01:06I'm just in a good mood.
01:01:08It's amazing how much nice her life is with no drama.
01:01:10Do you ever talk to your ex?
01:01:17Not a word.
01:01:18And that's good.
01:01:22You never told me how you found out she was cheating on you.
01:01:25She got pregnant.
01:01:27With some rich old guy's kid.
01:01:29We were on a break at the time.
01:01:30She got pregnant on purpose.
01:01:32Wow.
01:01:33The layers.
01:01:38Do you think that she got pregnant on purpose?
01:01:41No.
01:01:44Yes.
01:01:46I don't know.
01:01:47Probably.
01:01:47I have to wonder what kind of a fuck would I was to not really realize.
01:01:52She was always money obsessed.
01:01:54Thought being a mechanic was too blue collar.
01:01:57Wanted me to make more money.
01:02:00You seem like you're doing just fine to me.
01:02:02See?
01:02:04I'm just pissed off I wasted the best years of my life with her.
01:02:07Who said they were the best years?
01:02:11And look around you, Miles.
01:02:13It's a pretty beautiful day.
01:02:15You want for nothing.
01:02:17That is an incredible quality in a person.
01:02:22And I mean, look at you.
01:02:24You're smoking hot.
01:02:25You got a great job, house, friends.
01:02:29Really sexy fuck buddy.
01:02:35So don't sweat the past.
01:02:37Focus on the now.
01:02:39Seriously, right now, my bobber disappeared several minutes ago and I don't know.
01:02:43Shit, you got a bite.
01:02:49Are you kidding me?
01:02:52I got a bicycle tire.
01:02:54What the hell, Colorado?
01:02:56Way to keep it classy.
01:02:58My hands hurt.
01:03:00Surely you could see the irony in this.
01:03:02Babe, you got a tire.
01:03:04This is kiddin'.
01:03:05Ah!
01:03:05This is kiddin'.
01:03:06Truth or dare?
01:03:26Truth.
01:03:27do you ever get horny in the garage at tire depot what
01:03:31you're working on a customer's car and your hands are getting really dirty and you're just really
01:03:40digging in there and you just
01:03:46i'm afraid not damn
01:03:57but classic car work on the other hand if i'm working on one of those and an old car that
01:04:04hasn't run in decades and suddenly roars to life then hell yes rock solid
01:04:09i knew it perverts attract perverts
01:04:27okay truth or dare dare
01:04:30ooh somebody has secrets
01:04:35skinny dip in the lake
01:04:37the lake that birthed my blessed tiger no way
01:04:41who knows what the hell else is in that thing
01:04:43it's fine
01:04:45i knew you wouldn't do it
01:04:47all talk and no action
01:04:50uh...
01:04:52need i remind you who has been sneaking into tire depot for weeks now
01:04:57you call that dangerous
01:04:59i am consuming complimentary beverages without service miles
01:05:04that is just as bad as thieving
01:05:06such a cold hard criminal
01:05:10fine i'll do it
01:05:12but you have to do it with me
01:05:14and why would i do that
01:05:16because i'll be naked
01:05:22come on now
01:05:27we made it this far
01:05:29is that gonna hurt when you jump in the water
01:05:51not if you hold it
01:05:53come on
01:05:55get him off
01:05:57woohoo
01:06:01woohoo
01:06:02woohoo
01:06:04woohoo
01:06:08woohoo
01:06:10woohoo
01:06:12woohoo
01:06:14woohoo
01:06:16woohoo
01:06:18woo
01:06:19woo
01:06:20woo
01:06:22woo
01:06:27mercedes
01:06:28do you feel like
01:06:30do you feel that?
01:06:33feel what?
01:06:34oh my god that's freezing
01:06:35woo
01:06:36oh my god that's freezing
01:06:37woo
01:06:39woo
01:06:41woo
01:06:45woo
01:06:47woo
01:06:49Oh, my God.
01:07:19Oh, my God.
01:07:49Oh, my God.
01:08:19Oh, my God.
01:08:21Good morning.
01:08:23Morning.
01:08:25You've been busy this morning.
01:08:39Yeah, it's a muddy mess, so I figured we should head back early.
01:08:43Oh, okay.
01:08:48What can I do to help?
01:08:51I forgot the pancake mix.
01:08:57Don't read into that.
01:09:00Well, thanks for the help with the research.
01:09:12Well, thanks for the help with the research.
01:09:25Anytime.
01:09:26You okay?
01:09:28I'm tired.
01:09:30I shouldn't have gotten the mattress pad.
01:09:32Hmm.
01:09:34Looks like you got company.
01:09:38I'll see you later, Mercedes.
01:09:40Okay.
01:09:41Bye.
01:09:42Hi, Dean.
01:09:44Hey, Kate.
01:09:46Want to come in for some coffee?
01:09:47Is it complimentary?
01:09:48For people who aren't assholes, it is.
01:09:49Nothing to say about that loud muffler on Miles' truck?
01:09:50I'm surprised you know what a muffler is.
01:09:52I'm learning.
01:09:53I'm learning.
01:09:54Hey, Kate.
01:09:58Want to come in for some coffee?
01:10:00Is it complimentary?
01:10:04For people who aren't assholes, it is.
01:10:12Nothing to say about that loud muffler on Miles' truck?
01:10:16I'm surprised you know what a muffler is.
01:10:20I'm learning.
01:10:22I am too.
01:10:24I'm really sorry, Kate.
01:10:28Come on in, then.
01:10:34Did you spend the night at Miles' house last night?
01:10:37Are you really asking that?
01:10:39I'm just making small talk, Kate. I promise.
01:10:42No judgment.
01:10:44We were camping.
01:10:46Camping?
01:10:46It was for book research.
01:10:48And it was really fun.
01:10:50Writing something different?
01:10:52Trying to.
01:10:54Inspiration must be flowing.
01:10:57It has its moments.
01:11:00And Miles is the guy that brings this out in you.
01:11:03He's certainly not hurting things.
01:11:07So different for me.
01:11:11Dean, look.
01:11:12It wasüm.
01:11:12I'm like.
01:11:12So different.
01:11:13Good.
01:11:13See you next week.
01:11:13I'll try to meet this week.
01:11:26Take care.
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