- 2 months ago
peaceful vacation turns into chaos as monstrous arachnids attack, forcing an unexpected hero to battle the nightmare crawling across the land.
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00:00I don't know what to do.
00:00:30We're a damn negotiator.
00:00:44They said ten minutes.
00:00:45Ten minutes.
00:00:46We're all going to be dead in ten minutes.
00:00:48Sir, I think we've got company.
00:01:00What the hell is he doing here?
00:01:02I don't know.
00:01:03Son of a bitch thinks he's a hero now.
00:01:17Well, he's going to get us all killed.
00:01:22Look out, Jack!
00:01:24Hold your fire! Hold your fire!
00:01:30No, Jack! No!
00:01:48Jack! Jack!
00:01:50Don't leave me, Jack!
00:01:52Don't leave me, Jack!
00:01:54Go!
00:01:56No!
00:01:56No!
00:01:56No!
00:01:57No!
00:02:02No!
00:02:06Cut!
00:02:07Cut! No!
00:02:08There's a cat.
00:02:09Cut, cut, cut, cut.
00:02:10Are those the lines?
00:02:11Is that the script?
00:02:14Colton!
00:02:15Hey, man, are you okay?
00:02:16I think I hurt my back.
00:02:17Oh, oh, oh.
00:02:18You were so good, man.
00:02:19I know why I quit acting now.
00:02:21Oh, yeah.
00:02:22Well, everything looked just fine to me.
00:02:23You look fine to me.
00:02:24Ow!
00:02:25Let me rub that back for you.
00:02:26Good job, Mike.
00:02:27Okay.
00:02:28Come on.
00:02:29Come on.
00:02:30What happened to the scene?
00:02:31What happened to the comedy?
00:02:32Well, I changed a few things, kid.
00:02:34You changed some things?
00:02:35You can't do that.
00:02:36Well...
00:02:37Are you going to tell anyone?
00:02:38Well, you know, it wasn't working for me.
00:02:40It might be a little too funny.
00:02:41Yeah.
00:02:42It was too funny.
00:02:43Too funny?
00:02:44Yeah.
00:02:45It's supposed to be funny.
00:02:46It's a comedy.
00:02:47It's called Clown Cops.
00:02:48Yeah, well, my friend...
00:02:49You made a pizza cop car.
00:02:50My friend just got shot, Joshy.
00:02:53It's a flesh wound he moves.
00:02:54Yeah.
00:02:55Have you seen the scene?
00:02:56Have you read the scene?
00:02:57Have you read the script?
00:02:58Yeah, I have, but my character hasn't, you know, in my opinion.
00:03:01It should be more serious, I think.
00:03:03You think?
00:03:04No.
00:03:05You're not paid to think.
00:03:06You're paid to act.
00:03:07I'm paid to direct.
00:03:08And...
00:03:09It's not going well.
00:03:10You're going to have to tell the studio.
00:03:11I don't have to tell the studio.
00:03:12No.
00:03:13Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, Joshy.
00:03:14No, no, no.
00:03:15You know what it is?
00:03:16I'm...
00:03:17Whoa.
00:03:18I'm crashing.
00:03:19That's the problem.
00:03:20Are you okay?
00:03:21I'm crashing.
00:03:22Low blood sugar.
00:03:23Whoa, whoa, chair.
00:03:24Chair.
00:03:25Chair.
00:03:26I'm telling you.
00:03:27Where's Kyle?
00:03:28Maybe I need a salad or something.
00:03:29Kyle?
00:03:30Kyle?
00:03:31Yes, Mr. West.
00:03:32Lips.
00:03:33Lips.
00:03:34Lips.
00:03:35Quickly.
00:03:36Quickly.
00:03:37Whoa.
00:03:38Okay.
00:03:39Kyle, where's that salad?
00:03:40The kale salad from Lou's?
00:03:41Maybe it was declined.
00:03:42Who knows?
00:03:43I don't know.
00:03:44Um...
00:03:45This is very lovely.
00:03:46Just go get some food.
00:03:48Get your blood sugar.
00:03:49Yeah.
00:03:50Just a nice, comfy place.
00:03:51I need something.
00:03:54And then you come back here.
00:03:56And then read the preconceived scripted!
00:03:57This is nice.
00:03:58This is a nice sport coat.
00:03:59Barney's?
00:04:00Where is it from?
00:04:01It's from my grandfather.
00:04:02It's beautiful.
00:04:03Really beautiful.
00:04:04I'm sorry I snapped.
00:04:05It's okay.
00:04:06It happened.
00:04:07Let's read the scene.
00:04:08It's movie making.
00:04:09Okay.
00:04:10I'll be better.
00:04:11I'll be better.
00:04:12I'll be better, I swear.
00:04:13I'll be better.
00:04:14What happened?
00:04:15What happened with the credit card?
00:04:16How'd it get declined?
00:04:17Well, there were several suspicious charges.
00:04:19What?
00:04:20In Fort Lauderdale.
00:04:21Fort Lauderdale?
00:04:22Who's in Fort Lauderdale?
00:04:23Like...
00:04:24Oh, gee.
00:04:25Look.
00:04:26Just call the credit card company.
00:04:27Approve the charges.
00:04:28Get my kale salad.
00:04:29And do...
00:04:30Wow.
00:04:31Wow.
00:04:32You're so muscular.
00:04:33Yeah.
00:04:34It looks nice.
00:04:35You're working out.
00:04:36Sorta.
00:04:37Good.
00:04:38Okay.
00:04:39I'm not.
00:04:40I'm not.
00:04:41I'm not.
00:04:42I'm not.
00:04:43I'm not.
00:04:44I'm not.
00:04:45I'm not.
00:04:46I'm not.
00:04:47I'm not.
00:04:48I'm not.
00:04:49I'm not.
00:04:50Hey.
00:04:51Hey.
00:04:52Hey, Tuh, let me look.
00:04:53Hey.
00:04:54Hey!
00:04:55Let's go.
00:04:56Hey!
00:04:57Zhong.
00:04:58I'll see you later.
00:04:59ihm Princess셨les in Boston,25 Kelly, Rondeley, D она for her.
00:05:01Using the identificationレout of Bilt до my good news system on caught.
00:05:02I was in Fort Lauderdale.
00:05:04Your best friends, Amex and Visa.
00:05:06Hey, will you pass me that mango colada?
00:05:07Hey, shh.
00:05:08Whoa, whoa, whoa.
00:05:09That's not code named for a science book, huh?
00:05:11Mango colada?
00:05:12No, it's a beverage.
00:05:14Well, that's alcohol, and it's Friday.
00:05:16I'm 21, and I'm parched.
00:05:19Besides, we didn't have class today, so we have a three-day weekend.
00:05:21Some of us went to the beach, so stop freaking out.
00:05:24I'm not freaking out, okay?
00:05:26Look, I'm supposed to be looking after you while your mother's gone.
00:05:29How am I supposed to do that when I can't find you?
00:05:31I'm not 10. I don't have to tell you everything.
00:05:34Well, you know what? You do, as long as I'm paying for it.
00:05:37I'm fine, and I don't need my stepdad babysitting me.
00:05:41You're not checking up on Mom every day
00:05:43while she's halfway across the world in some yoga retreat, are you?
00:05:46Hey, you know what, Rhea?
00:05:47You're not your mother, okay?
00:05:49And she had a very tough year last year. You know that.
00:05:52My mom's gonna be fine.
00:05:53And no, you're right. I wasn't there.
00:05:56I was stuck in a library for 72 hours studying for finals week,
00:06:01being responsible, which is why you can trust me now, Colt.
00:06:05I do trust you, Rhea.
00:06:07And I know you can take care of yourself. I know you're responsible.
00:06:11And Rhea, you can call me Dad.
00:06:17Oh, my God!
00:06:18Oh, my God!
00:06:18What is...
00:06:19Oh, my God!
00:06:23Rhea?
00:06:24What just happened?
00:06:33Nothing good.
00:06:44We're here.
00:06:48Oh
00:07:18Oh
00:07:48We have to go
00:08:00Hey, this is Rhea. Leave me a message. Bye
00:08:03Rhea called me back. It's your dad
00:08:07This is Lisa Johnson, and I am here in the downtown district of Fort Lauderdale after massive sinkholes all over the city have birthed another wave of
00:08:15LaValanchelas and almost a year ago to the day where they first wreaked havoc on Los Angeles the big question on
00:08:21Everyone's mind right now is when will the military take action or
00:08:27Does Florida need Colton West? This is Lisa Johnson signing off from downtown
00:08:33I'm not doing this again
00:08:42Hey, you feel that
00:08:45No
00:08:47Hey, man, this is not California. Things do not shake like this in Florida
00:08:51Not outside the South Beach anyway
00:08:53Are you alright?
00:08:54Army helicopters
00:08:55Shaking
00:08:56I'm having a bad deja vu
00:08:58No, you're not
00:08:59Uh, were you on the phone with somebody?
00:09:01Yeah, my daughter Rhea
00:09:03Where's she at?
00:09:04Fort Lauderdale
00:09:05Oh, man, I heard that's what the epicenter of all this mess is
00:09:08Come on Colton. What would red rocket do?
00:09:12Fuck it, dude, baby
00:09:13Where are those guns you were working on?
00:09:22Where are those guns you were working on?
00:09:24This is a modified XM-25 counter-deaf allied target engagement system
00:09:36Specially designed to shoot armor-piercing 50 millimeter rounds
00:09:39And my favorite liquid nitrogen bombay
00:09:42The army likes to call this
00:09:44The Punisher
00:09:49And Swiss Army knife in the clip
00:09:51But with our modifications
00:09:53I call her
00:09:54A cold day in hell
00:09:56Ha ha ha
00:09:57Have you tested it?
00:09:58Nope
00:09:59But she pretty as hell
00:10:00Mr. West
00:10:01They're calling everyone back to set
00:10:03Hmm
00:10:04Go ahead
00:10:05We're not going back to set, Kyle
00:10:07Excuse me?
00:10:08When you signed up for this
00:10:09You knew what it was gonna tell, didn't ya?
00:10:11Yes, Mr. West
00:10:12And you said it was okay with you, didn't ya?
00:10:13Yes, Mr. West
00:10:14So I gotta know, punk
00:10:16Are you in?
00:10:17Or are you out?
00:10:19If it means I can stop getting your salads
00:10:21And start shooting spiders, Mr. West
00:10:23Then I am all in
00:10:24Wait, who's shooting spiders?
00:10:26The only thing we're doing is shooting a scene
00:10:28Yeah
00:10:29A very large, expensive scene
00:10:31That's going tens of thousands of dollars
00:10:32Over budget every minute
00:10:33Calm down, Joshy
00:10:34Here's the deal
00:10:36I'm gonna go take a whiz
00:10:38And then you and I, Mr. Director
00:10:40We're gonna make movie magic
00:10:43Okay
00:10:45Sounds good
00:10:47I have a good feeling about this
00:10:50Let's do it!
00:10:52Get in my bag
00:10:54Okay
00:10:56I can't
00:10:57I can't
00:10:58I can't
00:10:59No, no, no
00:11:00Not again
00:11:01Not again
00:11:02Not again
00:11:03Well
00:11:04You have to
00:11:05Just one more time
00:11:07You all better be safe
00:11:10Safe is our middle name
00:11:12Oh
00:11:13Okay, everyone
00:11:15We're back in two minutes
00:11:17Get the helicopter back up in the air
00:11:19Uh, we can't do that
00:11:21Why the hell not?
00:11:22Colton just hijacked it
00:11:24No!
00:11:25Colton!
00:11:26You know I'm gonna get fired for this, Mr. West
00:11:40You know I'm gonna get fired for this, Mr. West
00:11:42I know you're gonna get a purple heart for this, Lester
00:11:45Anything?
00:11:46No!
00:11:47The circus have probably overloaded
00:11:48Keep dialing, Kyle
00:11:50Hey, Colt! Colt! Colt!
00:11:51We got trouble down there!
00:11:52Take a look!
00:11:53You're crazy
00:11:55This is as far as I can go, Mr. West
00:11:58Oh my God!
00:11:59Oh my God!
00:12:00This is not happening!
00:12:01Dammit!
00:12:02Casey!
00:12:03I know, I know
00:12:04We have to keep it together
00:12:05No!
00:12:06We have to get out of here!
00:12:07All of us
00:12:08The others, we have to go
00:12:09They're at the bar
00:12:10Okay, that's, you know
00:12:11I don't feel so good after that flight
00:12:12What are we gonna do?
00:12:13We gotta help every man, woman, and child
00:12:15In that order
00:12:16Gotta get everybody out of here
00:12:17And we haven't even tested these yet
00:12:18Damn!
00:12:19You know, I don't feel so good after that flight
00:12:21What are we gonna do?
00:12:22We gotta help every man, woman, and child
00:12:23In that order
00:12:24Gotta get everybody out of here
00:12:25And we haven't even tested these yet
00:12:27Do it!
00:12:28Do it!
00:12:29Do it!
00:12:30Do it!
00:12:31It's not working!
00:12:32It's not working!
00:12:33If it was working, I would've done it!
00:12:34It's not working!
00:12:35Yeah!
00:12:36Yeah!
00:12:37Yeah!
00:12:38Are you okay Mr. West?
00:12:39Hell to the yeah, baby!
00:12:41Yeah!
00:12:42Gun works
00:12:43Go easy on these flocs, man
00:12:44Just use the 50mm rounds
00:12:45There's only a hundred per hour
00:12:47Don't tell me what to do
00:12:49Kyle
00:12:50Yeah?
00:12:51You got a stepfather, don't you?
00:12:52Depends on who you ask, but yeah
00:12:53Do you call him Dad?
00:12:55Yeah.
00:12:56sometimes if i was your stepfather would you call me dad yeah you would yeah really yeah
00:13:02now go get us a vehicle okay dad oh we're going in
00:13:12we have to hurry i know oh we got the music still on where's jen and claudia i don't know
00:13:19maybe they left before us without telling us i'm really worried me too we have to get everyone out
00:13:24of here hey guys guys listen to us stop the music lavalantulas are coming what lavalantulas never
00:13:33heard of them they're coming come on cool but i don't have that record yet i can't play what i don't
00:13:39have listen to me you have to clear everyone out of here what the city's on fire hear that yes this
00:13:50city is on fire
00:13:56what's the music
00:14:00what's the music
00:14:05oh god
00:14:09everybody has to leave
00:14:22we got to split up
00:14:33we got to split up not a good idea i said split up not a good idea just do it yeah i said it
00:14:52before
00:15:06hey hey hey hey hey hey hey who that who that say hello to my little friend uh
00:15:11uh um dave nice to meet you what american oh i didn't know run dave
00:15:20i owe you my life let's go
00:15:29man it's a tad breezy out here yeah we got a kyle reese this situation asap
00:15:41asap
00:15:44what the hell is he i don't know it's so hot out here i could fry an egg on my face
00:15:50nice ride kyle get out he's driving swag tech let's go come on your stuff's in the back thank
00:15:55you detective g you're in the back let me have it let's go
00:16:00okay where are we going i can't run we have to get out of here
00:16:10uh daniella i'm fine i just got burned back at the club
00:16:16what it's nothing it's just slightly burned we have to get you some medication screw the medication what are we gonna do
00:16:31i have an idea where are you going
00:16:34how are we doing back there kyle well uh there's nothing yet but i did find her on that find my
00:16:43phone app and she's still in fort lauderdale hey hey hey castiel finds out we're both busted again
00:16:48all right first we save raya then we save florida yeah you save raya you save florida you save california
00:16:56who's gonna save us we did it in l.a we'll do it here get this wrong we're gonna get a burn notice
00:17:02what is this this is sick exactly what we need don't touch that man what are you doing that's
00:17:21nothing to play with okay that's loaded with super cold compressed liquid nitrogen i use it
00:17:25for house parties now i use it to freeze the crap out of spiders so please just put it down
00:17:28before you heard somebody put it down oh my gosh hey i just said put it down hey it's a workplace tj
00:17:35safety first i know i just told him to put you good bro i told him to put it down yo i look like i got
00:17:40eight legs and spit lava sorry i'm sorry the hell they doing here anyway i don't know they just let
00:17:45themselves in we really need a car yeah well that's a ten thousand dollar deposit and a three-month
00:17:50waiting list deposit yes lavalanchulas are tearing up the entire city yo she right tj
00:17:57probably a four-month waiting list what did you just hear her we all have to get out of here we
00:18:02all heard her half my family's from los angeles they were all killed by the lavalanchulas rest their
00:18:09souls that's why i made this gun true now bye felicia's yeah well my stepfather was the guy who killed
00:18:16them all okay wait a minute colton west that's your father stepfather and yes really
00:18:26really yo that man's a legend he's the reason i made this gun ain't that right break yo swamp justice
00:18:33crazy movie crazy movie hey yo what's wrong with her she was burned by the spiders
00:18:39she really needs help so are you guys going to help us or what
00:18:42you guys going to help us or you guys going to help us get out of here we're going to help us
00:18:46Yo, Doc, break!
00:19:00Whoa!
00:19:01Whoa!
00:19:02Whoa!
00:19:03Whoa!
00:19:04Doc!
00:19:09Is there a problem, officer?
00:19:10You can't get through this way. You have to turn back.
00:19:12Hey, yo, what's up, MPs?
00:19:13We need to get to Fort Lauderdale.
00:19:14That's not possible.
00:19:15Listen, officer.
00:19:17Get back inside the car, sir.
00:19:18We have a serious La Valangela outbreak.
00:19:19I know.
00:19:20That's why we're here.
00:19:21No one can get through.
00:19:22All the roads have been closed off.
00:19:23Look, I don't know if you fellas watch the news,
00:19:26but we took care of these guys in Los Angeles.
00:19:29My name is Colton West, authorized movie star.
00:19:32I know who you are, Mr. West.
00:19:33I don't care if you're the president of the United States.
00:19:34No one's getting through.
00:19:35Hmm.
00:19:36What the heck are those?
00:19:38Guns!
00:19:39For killing spiders!
00:19:40Everyone's free!
00:19:41Hands up in the air!
00:19:42Nobody move!
00:19:45Officers!
00:19:46Look!
00:19:47Ah!
00:19:48Give him the gun!
00:19:49Hurry up!
00:19:50Stop!
00:19:51Oh!
00:19:52Get him!
00:19:53Get him!
00:19:54Get him!
00:19:55Get him!
00:19:56Get him!
00:19:57Get him!
00:19:58Come on!
00:19:59Get him!
00:20:00Get him!
00:20:01Get him!
00:20:02Get him!
00:20:03That's what I'm talking about, boy!
00:20:28If we keep driving in the glades like this,
00:20:31we are going to get stuck.
00:20:33I hate being right.
00:20:47Oh, oh, phone call, phone call, phone call!
00:20:53It's Wyatt.
00:20:56Probably asking for money.
00:20:59Uh-huh.
00:21:04Wyatt?
00:21:05Wyatt?
00:21:06Dad?
00:21:07Dad, are you hearing the news?
00:21:09Yeah.
00:21:10Thank God, son.
00:21:11You're okay.
00:21:12Thank God.
00:21:13It's happening again in Florida.
00:21:14I am freaking out right now.
00:21:15No, no, no.
00:21:16Wait, wait.
00:21:17What do you mean, son?
00:21:18What do you mean you're freaking out?
00:21:19Why are you freaking out?
00:21:20I'm on a movie set.
00:21:21I'm not in the jungle.
00:21:22I'm not stuck in the Everglades.
00:21:23And I'm not chasing lavalanchulas.
00:21:24Who said anything about the Everglades?
00:21:25I didn't say nothing.
00:21:26I'm just...
00:21:27Nothing, son.
00:21:28Just I'm okay.
00:21:29Ray is okay.
00:21:30We're all fine.
00:21:31We're gonna get out of here.
00:21:32Give my love to your mom.
00:21:33I love you very much, Wyatt.
00:21:34Okay, Dad.
00:21:35I love you, too.
00:21:36And I'll see you soon.
00:21:37Okay.
00:21:38Bye.
00:21:39So, you can get a video chat from Wyatt, but you can't get a hold of Ray, huh?
00:21:42Technology.
00:21:43Go figure.
00:21:44Technology.
00:21:45Technology.
00:21:46Go figure.
00:21:47Technology.
00:21:48Technology.
00:21:49Technology.
00:21:50Yeah.
00:21:51Yeah.
00:21:52Yeah.
00:21:53Yeah.
00:21:54Yeah.
00:21:55Yeah.
00:21:56Yeah.
00:21:57Yeah.
00:21:58Yeah.
00:21:59Yeah.
00:22:00Yeah.
00:22:01Yeah.
00:22:02Technology.
00:22:03And the frickin' Everglades, man.
00:22:04I'm...
00:22:05I've had enough of this place, man.
00:22:06Where's my Cadillac?
00:22:07I'm hot, and I'm thirsty, and I'm tired.
00:22:11Kyle, you just left the car.
00:22:13Ugh.
00:22:14Okay.
00:22:15Dead end.
00:22:17Multiple directions.
00:22:18Plan D.
00:22:19Why Florida?
00:22:20Huh?
00:22:21You ever wonder why Florida?
00:22:22No!
00:22:23I mean, all the crazy crap that happens in this country happens in this state.
00:22:28A man ate another man on the side of the freeway.
00:22:31I mean, a couple had to remove their time machine from their driveway.
00:22:35A time machine from their driveway.
00:22:38Just last month, a man was arrested for having sex with an alligator.
00:22:44No offense, Florida, but I'm surprised it didn't happen here first.
00:22:48A man and an alligator?
00:22:49Really?
00:22:50Yeah, yeah.
00:22:51You.
00:22:52Looked up on the internet.
00:22:53One of those sites.
00:22:54Don't go there.
00:22:55Ooh.
00:23:05Marty, if that's you, I'm gonna shoot you in the foot.
00:23:08What do you expect, man?
00:23:09We're outside of a floating house.
00:23:11What kind of a house is this?
00:23:13I don't know.
00:23:14I'm sure they got a boat and that's what we need.
00:23:16They don't even have a yard.
00:23:18God.
00:23:19All right.
00:23:22Split up.
00:23:23Hey, man, I don't wanna split up.
00:23:24Every time we split up, what happens?
00:23:25Like in the damn movies, man.
00:23:26I don't wanna split up.
00:23:27Marty, help me out.
00:23:28Just go around.
00:23:30Come on, man.
00:23:31Let's go around.
00:23:32Medusa split up, man.
00:23:33Go around.
00:23:35Go ahead.
00:23:37Still alive.
00:24:03You see?
00:24:07Over there on my wood crapper.
00:24:16I see you.
00:24:29Boy, you smell pretty.
00:24:32Where are we going?
00:24:33Anywhere these spiders ain't.
00:24:34Where's that?
00:24:35Pittsburgh.
00:24:37You ain't never been to Pittsburgh before.
00:24:40What are you even talking about?
00:24:41Whoa.
00:24:42Slow down, TJ.
00:24:43What is that?
00:24:47Great.
00:24:48Now what?
00:24:49Stay here.
00:24:54Rick, how are we gonna get around that?
00:24:56I don't know.
00:24:57Yeah, it's home.
00:24:58Look out!
00:24:59Look out!
00:25:00Look out!
00:25:01Look out!
00:25:02Do this!
00:25:03Whoa!
00:25:09Whoa!
00:25:11Yeah!
00:25:12Yo!
00:25:15Out, out!
00:25:16Oh my god.
00:25:17Me too, bro.
00:25:18Damn.
00:25:20Whoa!
00:25:21Back up!
00:25:22Hey, get us out of here!
00:25:23I got a plan.
00:25:24You colder than a penguin's toenail.
00:25:25Yeah.
00:25:26Oh my god.
00:25:27Show you that.
00:25:28That is amazing.
00:25:29Yo, but we out of liquid nitrogen.
00:25:30How the hell are we supposed to get more of that now?
00:25:31The school.
00:25:32At the medical lab.
00:25:33What school?
00:25:34Miami North University.
00:25:35Just a few miles down the road.
00:25:36We go there.
00:25:37Yo, what's the mascot?
00:25:38I don't know.
00:25:39I'm a medical student.
00:25:40But they keep a stockpile of it for experiments.
00:25:41I do not like this idea.
00:25:42I like it.
00:25:43TJ!
00:25:44Yo, I do not like this idea!
00:25:45What the heck?
00:25:47What's that?
00:25:48What the heck?
00:25:49What's that?
00:25:50What's that?
00:25:51Come on, it's a little girl.
00:25:52No, no, no.
00:25:53They're okay!
00:25:54They're okay.
00:25:55Oh, no.
00:25:56You're okay.
00:25:57They're okay.
00:25:58They're okay.
00:25:59Yeah!
00:26:00No, I don't know.
00:26:01It's just a gap in depth.
00:26:02I'm at the right time.
00:26:03Who's looking for a long run?
00:26:04No, I don't know!
00:26:06I don't know!
00:26:07Go to the right time!
00:26:08I was looking for the wrong run.
00:26:09They're okay.
00:26:10He's okay.
00:26:12We're being hunted.
00:26:15Yeah, what that was was the first wave.
00:26:18What do you mean, first wave?
00:26:19Well, first there were them, uh, snakehead frankenfish.
00:26:24Then everybody got crazy about them Bernese python.
00:26:29And now we got, uh, lavalanchulas.
00:26:32Yeah.
00:26:33Don't they know how delicate our ecosystem is out here?
00:26:36All right.
00:26:37How do we get to Fort Lauderdale?
00:26:39Well, I'd say your best bet is I'm fine.
00:26:45National Guard closed it.
00:26:47Well, can you get us across anyway?
00:26:49Can we just take that boat right there?
00:26:51That boat's got a flat tire.
00:26:53Strange things have been happening.
00:26:55I ain't been out there in weeks.
00:26:56Why is that?
00:26:57Well, about two weeks ago, the Matt and T's started beaching themselves.
00:27:02Didn't think much of it.
00:27:04Then all of a sudden these outcroppings started to rise from the glade.
00:27:07Look, I appreciate your passion for this stuff.
00:27:10But we got a life and death situation.
00:27:12Mister, you're talking to Florida's number one gator man.
00:27:16Name's Jim Dundee.
00:27:18But, uh, hey, Strawberry.
00:27:20You can call me Alligator.
00:27:23Alligator Dundee.
00:27:25What?
00:27:26Well, it's like, uh, Alligator Dundee.
00:27:29It's kind of like, uh...
00:27:30Kind of like what?
00:27:31Well, it's quite similar to, uh, like a superhero doing his thing.
00:27:35Yeah.
00:27:36You know, it's nothing.
00:27:37It's nothing.
00:27:38Look, can you get us across?
00:27:40You want to get across?
00:27:41Mm.
00:27:42Then you talk to me.
00:27:43Well, I thought that's what we're doing.
00:27:44Doing what?
00:27:45Talking to you.
00:27:46I'm talking to you to talk to me.
00:27:47Yeah, I know.
00:27:48I said you talk to me.
00:27:49No, I understand that.
00:27:50Then who you talking to?
00:27:51I apologize.
00:27:52Do you have a boat that works?
00:27:54Do I have a boat that works?
00:27:55Yeah.
00:27:56Sure.
00:27:57Follow me.
00:28:02Whoa!
00:28:16It's deserted.
00:28:17There must have been an evacuation.
00:28:19If there is an evacuation, then either spiders are coming or they're here.
00:28:24Stay in and out as quickly as possible.
00:28:27Help her.
00:28:28We need to talk.
00:28:29Okay.
00:28:30Your friend, when she burned her bit.
00:28:32I don't know why.
00:28:33Your father Colton, he didn't tell you what happened in L.A.?
00:28:36I mean, I know what everyone else knows, but my family doesn't like to talk about it.
00:28:39Look, I heard some crazy stuff that happened when people got bit.
00:28:42Like what?
00:28:43I don't know.
00:28:44I'm not from L.A., so I don't know.
00:28:45Like what?
00:28:46I heard that if you got bit, you'd become a host of baby spiders, like thousands of them.
00:28:53Like he just burnt out of your body, you know what I'm saying?
00:29:00That's what I heard, all right?
00:29:02She got burned, okay?
00:29:04So is that little strawberry real close friend of yours?
00:29:11Yeah, yeah, just a distant relative.
00:29:13I'm right here.
00:29:14I can hear you.
00:29:15There you go.
00:29:16Look at that.
00:29:17Right there.
00:29:18There's an outcropping.
00:29:19Boy, I ain't ever seen anything like that my whole life.
00:29:22Have you ever seen anything like that?
00:29:23Didn't I just say that?
00:29:24Yeah.
00:29:25Hey Colton, what do you think that is?
00:29:27Hell of a coincidence.
00:29:29Huh.
00:29:30Rob, relax, get lost
00:29:33Over there, over there!
00:29:35Get somebody here!
00:29:36Come on!
00:29:37Harder, harder to happen!
00:29:38I want somebody!
00:29:39Hey!
00:29:40Hey!
00:29:45Get up there!
00:29:46Get up there!
00:29:47Let's go!
00:29:48Have you ever seen them do this before?
00:29:50It's a new breed!
00:29:51Get the boat!
00:29:52Get the boat!
00:29:53Go, go.
00:29:54Go!
00:29:57Do you think that's behind you!
00:29:59Behind you!
00:30:00Hey!
00:30:01Kill that thing, man!
00:30:04You okay?
00:30:05I'm okay.
00:30:06I got you.
00:30:06I'm fine.
00:30:07I'm fine.
00:30:07I got you, sir.
00:30:08No, I feel secure.
00:30:09You're good.
00:30:10No, I feel secure.
00:30:11Oh!
00:30:12Come on, man!
00:30:15Go, go, go!
00:30:18I mean, we were stuck inside a ring of lava!
00:30:26Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
00:30:28But we sure taught those guys something.
00:30:31We gave them two cents, okay?
00:30:33We took the fight to those suckers!
00:30:35Is this where my highly paid star is taking the fight to these things?
00:30:39I ain't saying anything.
00:30:41Oh!
00:30:41Oh, here comes the Calgary!
00:30:43Come on, guys!
00:30:46Where's Colton West?
00:30:48Oh, good.
00:30:48Are you guys here to evacuate us?
00:30:51I am Colonel Nathan R. Jester with the Army Corps of Engineers.
00:30:55And I am looking for a Colton West.
00:30:59I was told he was here.
00:31:01Can you tell me where I might find Colton West?
00:31:04Well, I could think of a few places.
00:31:05Well, name one.
00:31:06The unemployment office.
00:31:09How about another?
00:31:10The studio blacklist.
00:31:12Yeah.
00:31:13All right.
00:31:14Let's set up a mobile command station right here.
00:31:17Move out!
00:31:17No!
00:31:18No one's going in there!
00:31:19That is a hot set!
00:31:21That's a hot set!
00:31:22That's a movie talk for...
00:31:23You can't move anything.
00:31:25It's movie talk.
00:31:26Studio blacklist.
00:31:28You think this is funny?
00:31:30Colonel Jester?
00:31:31I don't think there's anything funny about this at all.
00:31:35Colonel Jester.
00:31:37It's a little bit funny.
00:31:39It's a little bit funny, yeah.
00:31:41You know, I do not like your attitude.
00:31:43You know, no one does.
00:31:45That's what makes me a good director.
00:31:47So are you here to evacuate us or what?
00:31:49Well, we'll talk about that.
00:31:51But right now, for the fourth time,
00:31:53I'm going to ask you,
00:31:54can you tell me where I can find Colton?
00:31:59This is a matter of national security.
00:32:05General?
00:32:06Colonel?
00:32:07Colonel.
00:32:08He could be on a fan boat in the middle of the Everglades,
00:32:10for all I know.
00:32:12What's happening?
00:32:28How's Gator?
00:32:29Uh, not good, man.
00:32:31Jim's dead, Colton.
00:32:33I think I can save him.
00:32:35Come on.
00:32:36I stopped him bleeding.
00:32:37Or he ran out of blood.
00:32:39One of the two.
00:32:40Go on.
00:32:40Do you even know where you're going?
00:32:42Kyle, we're in a swamp.
00:32:44Of course I don't know where we're going.
00:32:47What?
00:32:48Wait.
00:32:49Got him.
00:32:50Thing.
00:32:52Go that way!
00:32:53Ah!
00:32:58No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
00:32:59Ah!
00:33:00Ah!
00:33:00Ah!
00:33:00Ah!
00:33:00Ah!
00:33:00Ah!
00:33:00Ah!
00:33:01Ah!
00:33:01Ah!
00:33:01Ah!
00:33:01Ah!
00:33:02Ah!
00:33:02Ah!
00:33:03Ah!
00:33:03Ah!
00:33:04Ah!
00:33:05Ah!
00:33:05Ah!
00:33:06Ah!
00:33:06Ah!
00:33:07Ah!
00:33:07Ah!
00:33:08Ah!
00:33:08Ah!
00:33:09Ah!
00:33:09Ah!
00:33:10Ah!
00:33:10Ah!
00:33:11Ah!
00:33:11Ah!
00:33:12Ah!
00:33:12Ah!
00:33:13Ah!
00:33:14Ah!
00:33:14Ah!
00:33:14Ah!
00:33:16All right, where they at, where they at?
00:33:18Where we at?
00:33:21Hey, yo, Brick, don't lose these.
00:33:28Are you okay, girl?
00:33:31I think my burn is making me feel sick.
00:33:35Okay, we're gonna be fine, okay?
00:33:39Hey, guys, it's a cold room.
00:33:42Come on, in here.
00:33:46Oh, damn, it's cold in here.
00:33:50It has to be, to keep things right.
00:33:54We got him.
00:33:56Ow!
00:33:58Come on.
00:34:02Is everybody okay?
00:34:04Uh, Jim's still dead, man.
00:34:06I met you girls.
00:34:08I'm fine.
00:34:10Where the hell are we, Kyle?
00:34:12Give me a second.
00:34:13Um, um...
00:34:14By my calculations, we're about 40 miles west of Fort Lauderdale.
00:34:18Eh, it's not good enough.
00:34:19We gotta get to Rhea.
00:34:20Well, she's...
00:34:21Hey, wait.
00:34:22She's at her school.
00:34:23Wait a minute.
00:34:24Why would she go to her school?
00:34:25Because she wants to be a geologist.
00:34:27We gotta get to that school.
00:34:28What about...
00:34:29What about Alligator, who died of natural causes?
00:34:31Eh, that's what he would've wanted.
00:34:32He's a swamp man.
00:34:33Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait a minute.
00:34:34Newsflash.
00:34:35We are in the middle of nowhere.
00:34:36Shh!
00:34:37You hear that?
00:34:38People?
00:34:39I smell popcorn.
00:34:40And I'm gonna eat it.
00:34:41She's been with us for 20 years.
00:34:42That's right.
00:34:43Green.
00:34:44All right.
00:34:45We call her Mean Green.
00:34:46Wow.
00:34:47She ain't the big one.
00:34:48That's what he would've wanted.
00:34:49That's what he would've wanted.
00:34:50He's a swamp man.
00:34:51Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait a minute.
00:34:52Newsflash.
00:34:53We are in the middle of nowhere.
00:34:54Shh!
00:34:55You hear that?
00:34:56People?
00:34:57I smell popcorn.
00:35:00And I'm gonna eat it.
00:35:02She's been with us for 20 years.
00:35:04That's right.
00:35:05Ooh.
00:35:06Green.
00:35:07All right.
00:35:08We call her Mean Green.
00:35:09Wow.
00:35:10She ain't the biggest, but she's the meanest captive alligator in the Everglades!
00:35:22Oh, it's an alligator show.
00:35:27That's not part of the show.
00:35:29Yeah!
00:35:30Keep going!
00:35:31Go ahead!
00:35:32Move!
00:35:33Move!
00:35:34Move!
00:35:35Keep going!
00:35:36Come on!
00:35:43Keep moving!
00:35:44Keep moving!
00:35:45Keep moving!
00:35:46Keep moving!
00:35:47Keep moving!
00:35:48Keep moving!
00:35:49Move!
00:35:50Move!
00:35:51Move!
00:35:52Move!
00:35:53Move it!
00:35:55Yo, let's hold the guns up, bro.
00:35:56Where the guns at?
00:35:57Oh, don't you have them?
00:35:58Do I look like I got them?
00:36:00No.
00:36:01Dude, I told you to get them from the truck.
00:36:02That ain't what you said.
00:36:03Man, yeah, I did, man.
00:36:04You told me to help Watson's face here.
00:36:06No, I didn't, man.
00:36:07Hey, enough!
00:36:08I'll grab the guns.
00:36:10All right, I'll help you if that's what you trying to do.
00:36:13Back away from the lava-lantula.
00:36:28Back away from the lava-lantula.
00:36:31It's not doing anything.
00:36:32What is happening?
00:36:33Why isn't it attacking me?
00:36:34It's like it doesn't see you.
00:36:35It's the cold.
00:36:36That has to be it.
00:36:37We're so cold that it doesn't see us.
00:36:38as living.
00:36:39You mean because I'm freezing it sees me as a chair?
00:36:41No, it probably sees me as a chair.
00:36:42It probably sees you as a couch or something.
00:36:43Whatever.
00:36:44So as long as we are cold, we are safe.
00:36:46What are we gonna die if we stay in here?
00:36:48We need to do this.
00:36:49It's not doing anything.
00:36:50What is happening?
00:36:51What is happening?
00:36:52Why isn't it attacking me?
00:36:53It's like it doesn't see you.
00:36:54It's the cold.
00:36:55It has to be it.
00:36:56We're so cold that it doesn't see us as living.
00:37:01You mean because I'm freezing it sees me as a chair?
00:37:04No, it probably sees me as a chair.
00:37:05It probably sees you like a couch or something.
00:37:07Whatever.
00:37:08So as long as we are cold, we are safe.
00:37:12die if we stay in here and we're gonna die if we go out there man we should have guns right now
00:37:17but maybe if we keep our body temperature cold enough we can go get the guns with the liquid
00:37:22nitrogen tanks like they use in cryotherapy what therapy it's the use of really low temperatures
00:37:29and medical treatments that's it i don't like this idea i do not like this idea
00:37:42my pleasure you know who i am oh you recognize me from movies television what about uh red rocket
00:37:58hey i'm the red rocket or uh or there's hell to pay what about the condom commercial in the 90s
00:38:03oh this isn't mine it's too big no what about hey nice pants nice hands who you are colton sorry
00:38:10hey i'm just trying to talk to the man that chopper do you know who owns it zed zed where's zed
00:38:16zed's dead man zed's dead what do you know how to fly it not a lick okay do you mind if we take it
00:38:21if it works it works wait a minute wait a minute what's going through your mind colton was a little
00:38:25flick i did in the 90s called air bandits big hit that was 20 years ago it was three hours training
00:38:31they cut the scene and that's not a plan a what's your plan b i'll catch you later i'll catch you
00:38:35later catch you later he remembers catch you later you can't find that chopper you got 847 to 3 odds
00:38:44never tell me the odds and it was four hours training and 25 years ago
00:38:53yo i'm so cold i could hug a lava land through right now okay that should be enough yeah we should be
00:39:01cold enough we just gotta head to the truck and ground the guns okay but we gotta move slow
00:39:08give me the keys oh i'll put them on the table what the why i want to lose them okay let's go
00:39:17but slowly moving faster will raise our body temps too quickly oh and mine rises much faster than the rest
00:39:23of y'alls okay tj and i will go out there brick stay with daniella it's safer in here and then once
00:39:35we reload the guns we'll come back for you hey yo two words don't die
00:39:43let's go stay over there you're gonna be good
00:39:55expensive all right okay button button who's got the button no no yes yes
00:40:04just like i remember
00:40:23yo fellas i think i'm gonna be pretty good at this flying thing
00:40:28hey hey you want my opinion on that
00:40:31okay just a little bump in the road ladies
00:40:37kyle i'm gonna need you to keep an eye on reyes coordinates you're gonna be my gps i'm gonna need
00:40:43you to keep us in the air you're my pilot piece of cake
00:41:01i'm gonna need you to keep an eye on reyes coordinates you're gonna need you to keep an eye on reyes coordinates
00:41:13okay
00:41:23uh
00:41:25Oh, no.
00:41:27Oh, no.
00:41:29Oh, no.
00:41:31Oh, no.
00:41:33Oh, no.
00:41:35Oh, no.
00:41:37Oh, good.
00:41:39There you go.
00:41:41Get out of the farthest end.
00:41:45Oh, no.
00:41:47Oh, no.
00:41:49Oh, no.
00:41:51Oh, no.
00:41:53Oh, no.
00:42:15Oh, no, no.
00:42:17Oh, no, no, no.
00:42:19There's going on.
00:42:21Get the door.
00:42:46Shh.
00:42:47I am shh.
00:42:47Shh.
00:42:51Go, go, go, go.
00:43:21Go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go.
00:43:31Man, I hope they made it.
00:43:34Rick, can you please look at my burn?
00:43:37I feel really weird, like I'm gonna, like I'm gonna hurl or something.
00:43:40Yo, I'm a mechanic.
00:43:42I work on cars, not spider burn.
00:43:44Rick, please.
00:43:46All right.
00:43:47What?
00:43:48No, nothing.
00:43:49Nothing.
00:43:50It looks good.
00:43:51I don't know what I liked before, but you're gonna be all right.
00:43:56It doesn't hurt as bad as before.
00:43:57I think the cold is helping it.
00:43:58Move!
00:43:59What happened?
00:44:00Move!
00:44:01Where is Daniella?
00:44:02She ain't gonna make it.
00:44:03What?
00:44:04No.
00:44:05No.
00:44:06No.
00:44:07No.
00:44:08No.
00:44:09No.
00:44:10No.
00:44:11No.
00:44:12No.
00:44:13No.
00:44:14Open the door!
00:44:15No.
00:44:16No.
00:44:17No.
00:44:18Hey!
00:44:19Move!
00:44:20What happened?
00:44:21Move!
00:44:22Rhea.
00:44:23Where's Daniella?
00:44:24She ain't gonna make it.
00:44:25What?
00:44:26No!
00:44:27Rhea, no.
00:44:28Rhea, no.
00:44:29Rhea, come on.
00:44:30We're right above her.
00:44:31I'm gonna take her down!
00:44:32She's moving faster!
00:44:33That can only mean...
00:44:34She's in trouble.
00:44:35Oh, man.
00:44:36Are you sure you can land this thing?
00:44:37Never underestimate me, Marty.
00:44:40Y'know that.
00:44:41Rhea, no.
00:44:42I'm gonna...
00:44:43Rhea, no...
00:44:44Rhea, no.
00:44:47Rhea, no.
00:44:48Rhea, no.
00:44:50Rhea, no.
00:44:51Rhea, no.
00:44:52Rhea, no.
00:44:53Rhea, no.
00:44:54Rhea, no.
00:44:55Rhea, no.
00:44:56Rhea, no.
00:44:57Rhea, no.
00:44:58Rhea, no.
00:44:59Rhea, no.
00:45:00Rick, there's your ammo, man.
00:45:05Rick!
00:45:08There's way too many of them.
00:45:09They're too lava, too langula.
00:45:12Get out of here.
00:45:13Rick, no, man.
00:45:14We have to go, TJ.
00:45:18Let's do this.
00:45:26Man, I don't want to die today.
00:45:28We're not going to die.
00:45:28We just have to keep it together.
00:45:30Rick's gone, okay?
00:45:31Rick's gone.
00:45:32Listen to me.
00:45:33Listen to me.
00:45:35I lost my best friend, too.
00:45:37But we're going to get out of here.
00:45:39Okay?
00:45:41I promise.
00:45:52Wait.
00:45:52I'm going to get out of here.
00:46:00Okay.
00:46:01Okay.
00:46:04Okay.
00:46:05Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.
00:46:35Oh, oh, oh.
00:47:05Oh, oh, oh.
00:47:07Oh.
00:47:08Oh.
00:47:10Go, go, go.
00:47:12Go, go, go, go, go.
00:47:14Keep going, keep going, though.
00:47:15Someone go away from me.
00:47:16Keep going.
00:47:17Where's the gun?
00:47:18It's still in the kitchen right now.
00:47:20Oh.
00:47:21Oh.
00:47:22Oh.
00:47:23Oh.
00:47:24Oh.
00:47:25Oh.
00:47:26Oh.
00:47:27Oh.
00:47:28Oh.
00:47:29Oh.
00:47:30Oh.
00:47:31Oh.
00:47:32Oh.
00:47:33Oh.
00:47:34Oh.
00:47:35Oh.
00:47:36Oh.
00:47:37Oh.
00:47:38Oh.
00:47:39Oh.
00:47:40Oh.
00:47:41Oh.
00:47:42Oh.
00:47:43Oh.
00:47:44Oh.
00:47:45Oh.
00:47:46Oh.
00:47:47Oh.
00:47:48Oh.
00:47:49Oh.
00:47:50Oh.
00:47:51Oh.
00:47:52Oh.
00:47:53Oh.
00:47:54Oh.
00:47:55Oh.
00:47:56Oh.
00:47:57Oh.
00:47:58Oh.
00:47:59What are we going to do?
00:48:04They're everywhere.
00:48:29Yes!
00:48:37Coulton!
00:48:40Yes!
00:48:42Oh, yes!
00:48:44Hey!
00:48:46Oh, wait, wait! Whoa, whoa, whoa!
00:48:48Wait, wait!
00:48:49Rayla! I got a boyfriend.
00:48:50Coulton!
00:48:51Oh, ho, ho, ho!
00:48:53Thank goodness you're okay.
00:48:54Daniella's dead. Everyone's dead.
00:48:57I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry, honey.
00:49:00I promise you, everything's going to be okay.
00:49:02I didn't think you'd come.
00:49:04Well, if you would answer your phone once in a while,
00:49:06what do you mean I wouldn't come?
00:49:07How could I not come back for you?
00:49:09You're my daughter.
00:49:12It's going to be okay.
00:49:13No, that ain't true. Ain't nothing going to be okay.
00:49:15Who is he?
00:49:16That's TJ. Saved my life.
00:49:18Yo, I'm a great fan, man. Big fan.
00:49:21Thanks for coming for us, man.
00:49:22I got a gun!
00:49:24I made a gun and you inspired it. It's in there.
00:49:26I'm going to go get it for you.
00:49:27I'm going to show it to you.
00:49:28Okay, you can make us later.
00:49:29Right now, we are not out of the woods yet.
00:49:31We've got to find her and kill her.
00:49:32Fine, who?
00:49:33These are just babies.
00:49:34The mama's hiding somewhere.
00:49:35When this happened in Los Angeles,
00:49:37the good Dr. Von Struble gave us a thermal image of the city.
00:49:40We were able to find her.
00:49:41I can do that.
00:49:42Thermal, spectral, infrared.
00:49:44Last semester, I did my thesis on global drought
00:49:47and raising global temperatures.
00:49:49We had access to all the satellite information.
00:49:51Show us, honey.
00:49:52Just follow me.
00:49:55You got a cool-ass dollar, Mr. West.
00:49:56Don't even think about it.
00:49:57I...
00:49:58I don't want it crossing your mind.
00:49:59I know I'm...
00:50:00You got me.
00:50:01Okay, all right.
00:50:03We got to get that chopper operational.
00:50:05Can you do it?
00:50:06Come on, man.
00:50:07What happens every time we split up?
00:50:08Weird stuff happens.
00:50:09Oh, come on, Marty.
00:50:10How about we split up temporarily?
00:50:12I get the chopper.
00:50:13I'll meet you out front.
00:50:14Great idea.
00:50:15All right?
00:50:16Cool.
00:50:22Go!
00:50:25Sir.
00:50:26No.
00:50:27We think we've located Colton West.
00:50:28We got him on the line.
00:50:29What did you do to my set?
00:50:30You wrecked my set.
00:50:31Wait.
00:50:32Did I hear you correctly?
00:50:33Did you find that SOB?
00:50:34Did you find them?
00:50:35Are they okay?
00:50:36Will you get these morons out of my office?
00:50:37Yes, sir.
00:50:38This is crazy.
00:50:39You can't take me off my own movie set, General.
00:50:40It is, Colonel.
00:50:41And this is now a military operation.
00:50:42I can do whatever the hell I want to do.
00:50:43Now, Private, please get these people out of my face.
00:50:45Ah!
00:50:46Ah!
00:50:47Ah!
00:50:48Ah!
00:50:49Ah!
00:50:50Ah!
00:50:51Ah!
00:50:52Ah!
00:50:53Ah!
00:50:54Ah!
00:50:55Ah!
00:50:56Ah!
00:50:57Ah!
00:50:58Ah!
00:50:59Ah!
00:51:00Ah!
00:51:01Ah!
00:51:02Ah!
00:51:03Ah!
00:51:04Ah!
00:51:05Ah!
00:51:06Ah!
00:51:07Ah!
00:51:08Ah!
00:51:09Ah!
00:51:10Don't you touch me!
00:51:11I'm-a goin' on my own accord!
00:51:12Ah!
00:51:13Don't let me die on clown cops.
00:51:15This can't be my last movie.
00:51:17I'm so over budget.
00:51:23Something like this?
00:51:24Exactly like that.
00:51:25Now zoom in on Miami.
00:51:28Brilliant.
00:51:30And you thought I was only partying, Colt?
00:51:33When did I say that?
00:51:34I never said that.
00:51:35I never said that.
00:51:36I never said you were only partying.
00:51:37So that's it?
00:51:38You think that's the, uh, Mama Lancula?
00:51:41That is one massive heat signature under Miami.
00:51:45Whatever it is, it is huge.
00:51:47What?
00:51:48The, uh, Mama Lancula?
00:51:50Uh-huh.
00:51:51No, no, no, no.
00:51:52That's much, much bigger.
00:51:54That's no Mama Lancula.
00:51:56That's a freakin' Gargantulangula.
00:52:01Mama Lanculangula.
00:52:03Damn.
00:52:05What?
00:52:06The Mama Tarantula?
00:52:08No.
00:52:09Gargantulangula.
00:52:10Gorgantulangula?
00:52:11What?
00:52:12Is it?
00:52:13The Gorgantula?
00:52:14No.
00:52:15No, it's a...
00:52:16Yes, it's a Gargantula.
00:52:17It's a Gorg...
00:52:18More Melanchula.
00:52:19No, with a R?
00:52:20No, with a G-A-R.
00:52:21Gargant...
00:52:22Gargant...
00:52:23Gargant...
00:52:24Gargant...
00:52:25What's the last part?
00:52:26Gar-gan...
00:52:27Just say...
00:52:28It's very, very bad.
00:52:29It's very bad.
00:52:36That's the government.
00:52:37How do you know that?
00:52:41Cause it's ringing really weird.
00:52:45Hello.
00:52:46Colton West.
00:52:47Speaking.
00:52:48Yeah, this is, uh, Colonel Nathan R. Jester.
00:52:51You are familiar with the situation down in Florida?
00:52:53Yeah.
00:52:54Slightly.
00:52:56Yeah, well, uh...
00:52:57You are the only one that has successfully dealt with these things, and, uh...
00:53:02I need your help.
00:53:04And I need your team.
00:53:05Great.
00:53:06Then come pick us up.
00:53:08No can do.
00:53:09You're located in a hot zone.
00:53:10Yeah, in a hot zone.
00:53:12Believe me, I've been through this before.
00:53:15I know you have.
00:53:16I know you have.
00:53:17Well, I got an idea.
00:53:19If you listen to me, I...
00:53:20No, you listen to me, Gerald.
00:53:22It's Colonel.
00:53:23Colonel.
00:53:24You listen to me.
00:53:26You position your satellites for a thermal image of Miami's dead.
00:53:32We found her.
00:53:33I found something.
00:53:34This one makes the one in L.A. look like a flea.
00:53:39So we find her.
00:53:40We root her out.
00:53:42And we blow her up.
00:53:44I'm no expert.
00:53:45But the heat signature on this one is like something I've never seen before.
00:53:50It'll work once.
00:53:51It'll work again.
00:53:52We strike hard.
00:53:53We strike first.
00:53:54And we show no mercy.
00:53:55These aren't like the ones in L.A.
00:53:59They're bigger.
00:54:00They're hotter.
00:54:01They're nastier.
00:54:02So what are you suggesting that we just simply do nothing and move on?
00:54:14Suggesting you don't piss it off.
00:54:17I don't want you and your friends to do anything real stupid like the last time.
00:54:22I don't have friends.
00:54:26I got family.
00:54:27Well, I got bombs, so you and your family can just stay tight.
00:54:32We'll check out your map.
00:54:34We'll get a confirmation to you.
00:54:36Don't hang up on me.
00:54:46They want us to sit tight.
00:54:48Sit tight?
00:54:49How can anyone sit tight right now?
00:54:52They're gonna get us all killed.
00:54:55Colton, this is the U.S. military we're talking about.
00:54:58Kyle, you know I have a problem with authority.
00:55:06Nobody, nobody knows these spiders like I know these spiders.
00:55:16Colonel, thermal images are up.
00:55:19Oh.
00:55:24He's right.
00:55:25Whatever that is, it's huge.
00:55:28That is the behemoth of all spiders.
00:55:31Get Senkom on the line.
00:55:33We're gonna smoke around.
00:55:36Then we're gonna light her ass up.
00:55:40We're gonna light her ass up.
00:55:43What happened to the chopper?
00:55:44We can't get to the chopper.
00:55:45Why not?
00:55:46Remember when I told you that every time we split up, weird stuff happens?
00:55:49Yeah.
00:55:50Yeah.
00:55:51Well, I was on my way to the...
00:55:53Right.
00:56:00And then what?
00:56:02Marshmallows.
00:56:03Huh.
00:56:04So what do we do?
00:56:05Does anybody have a car?
00:56:06I do.
00:56:07Ha!
00:56:08Brilliant!
00:56:09Go!
00:56:14I don't understand why we can't just sit back and let the military handle this.
00:56:17Because they don't know.
00:56:18And they don't know.
00:56:20You keep saying that.
00:56:21What don't they know?
00:56:22They haven't ridden on the back of one of these things like I have.
00:56:25And he has.
00:56:26And they haven't looked in the eyes of one of these things like I have.
00:56:29And he has.
00:56:30I think you made a wrong turn.
00:56:31Yeah, yeah.
00:56:32Chill out.
00:56:33This is my home.
00:56:34All right?
00:56:35We're dead.
00:56:36What's happening?
00:56:37TJ, shut the hell up and get out!
00:56:38They're shooting at us!
00:56:39They're shooting at us!
00:56:40They're not shooting at us!
00:56:41Let's go!
00:56:42Let's go!
00:56:43Let's go!
00:56:44Let's go!
00:56:45Go!
00:56:46Let's go!
00:56:47Let's go!
00:56:48Go!
00:56:49They're shooting at us!
00:56:50They're shooting at us!
00:56:51They're shooting at us!
00:56:52Let's go!
00:56:53Go!
00:56:54Get off!
00:56:56Let's go!
00:56:57No, any of us!
00:56:58No!
00:56:59No!
00:57:00Are you cold and west?
00:57:01Damn scary!
00:57:03Yeah, they should have continued the franchise
00:57:24Stand back, I'm gonna show you boys hot dog
00:57:33Oh
00:57:39What is that sir?
00:57:41Well, whatever the hell it is chasing the hell away you have any more of it. I'm out. I'm out ammo everybody back in the house
00:57:48Come on they return
00:57:50Gonna be pissed
00:58:03Got it boys
00:58:14We have direct hits sir. Well that should wake your ass up, huh?
00:58:25Greetings
00:58:27It's a nice night
00:58:34All things considering
00:58:37Yeah, it's all right
00:58:42I love straight out of Compton
00:58:44What?
00:58:45Yeah, I know he's busy busy destroying this entire city. He doesn't know what he's dealing with now put him on the damn phone
00:58:54What do you want?
00:58:57They don't matter
00:58:58It's the big one
00:58:59The gargantulantula you kill it you kill them all
00:59:08I've done this before these lavalantulas, they're not like the last ones and this big one
00:59:17No weapon can come close to it. I'm about to prove you wrong. Really?
00:59:24Who's hungry
00:59:26Really mom? Who can eat at a time like this?
00:59:29Hey, man's got to eat now shut your mouth and put some food in it before I slap you upside the head damn boy
00:59:35What's wrong with you? I'm gonna question your mama in front of guests
00:59:38I was just saying I wasn't hungry
00:59:39Make your butt hungry
00:59:40Lord is this what it takes for a mama to get her kids back in the house at the same time a damn lavalantula invasion
00:59:48Mm-hmm hell if I'd have known that I'd have called up them lavalantulas years ago
00:59:52Well, what's wrong with you? You can't call no lavalantula
00:59:55Don't tell me what I can and can't do. I got Colton West up in my house a real movie star
01:00:01That's very kind of you ma'am and completely accurate
01:00:03Don't interrupt me movie star
01:00:04You need to eat too. You look skinnier than you did 20 years ago in that Crimson Flyer movie
01:00:09Well, it's actually called red rocket. It was a huge hit
01:00:12Mm-hmm. That's the potatoes
01:00:15Elizabeth you know them potatoes give me gas. Oh, you won't eat some potatoes or I'm gonna make you wear room
01:00:21Sir
01:00:23Can you tell me again?
01:00:24What was that material that you were shooting out your leaf blower fire retardant really? Yeah, it's ammonia and phosphate. That's right
01:00:32Girl got a brain
01:00:34TJ why can't you find a girl like that?
01:00:36What are you talking about pops? I do she she right here ain't she?
01:00:44Hal, where do you get that stuff?
01:00:46Pops used to work for a fire department
01:00:48Really?
01:00:49Yeah
01:00:5030 years
01:00:51You know I played a psychologically complicated fireman with a drinking problem in the hit film scorcher
01:00:57I didn't really care for that movie very much
01:00:59They should have consulted a real fireman and the fire the computer generated crap
01:01:04Man, that just looks silly. Well, it's Hollywood, Hal. You know, I just read them. I don't write them
01:01:09But anyway, do you have any more of that stuff down at the station?
01:01:13Hell if I know, man
01:01:14I ain't been to the station since they cut my damn pension
01:01:18But I can tell you where they got a load of it though
01:01:20Where?
01:01:21At the airfield
01:01:22Hmm
01:01:23The Forest Service
01:01:24It's where we drop it out of planes for forest fires
01:01:26You know anybody could fly one of those planes
01:01:29You're looking at it
01:01:31First job I had when I got out the air force
01:01:35Really?
01:01:38Colton
01:01:39Is there something on your mind?
01:01:41Uh-huh
01:01:42I'm thinking
01:01:44That one of those planes we'd never get close enough to drop it
01:01:48That big one the heat coming off of it would explode the plane immediately
01:01:53Yeah, or if we even try to get close she'll shoot that silica garbage or whatever that is
01:01:57And we would fry
01:01:59At the school
01:02:01When we were being attacked the spiders didn't see us
01:02:03She's right
01:02:04We got so cold in there
01:02:05We lowered our body temperature enough that we were invisible to them
01:02:09Really
01:02:12So
01:02:14Have you got any guys who could help us load one of those planes?
01:02:18Not a problem
01:02:18And have you got any guys who can get us to that airfield?
01:02:22Not a problem
01:02:24And how do you feel about helping me beat that thing and saving this city?
01:02:29Not a problem
01:02:31Good
01:02:34Then let's extinguish the bitch
01:02:42Oh heavenly father
01:02:43What?
01:02:44Breaking news live pictures coming in now from downtown Miami and imagination
01:02:48Stadium
01:02:49We can now see what the military has been targeting with those airstrikes
01:02:53Oh my goodness
01:02:55It's a giant lavalangela
01:02:57The entire stadium has been reduced to rubble
01:03:10Let's move out
01:03:12Well that sure as hell ain't no it's a bit's a spider
01:03:15Yeah
01:03:16She's really big sir
01:03:20Blow her up
01:03:21Target is live proceed to destroy
01:03:23Roger that
01:03:24All right fellas you heard the man
01:03:26Let's go light her up
01:03:28To me
01:03:29Tommy's hit we're too close pull up pull up
01:03:41Pull up
01:03:42Ah
01:03:46It's not working sir nothing is getting through
01:03:49Gimme gimme gimme i'm gonna maintenance these here six a lot
01:04:01Yes yes
01:04:02Colton
01:04:04Oh
01:04:06Arnie what the hell are you doing
01:04:07Stupid Colton you were a pain in the ass when your career was going to the toilet and you're a bigger
01:04:12Pain in the ass now
01:04:12That's what you risked your life for to tell me
01:04:14I know what you're up to
01:04:15Are you out of your mind
01:04:16No i've never been clearer i think i found a higher call
01:04:19Higher calling my ass
01:04:21You want to waltz into cities and save millions you go through me
01:04:25I'm your agent
01:04:26You think hollywood pays well
01:04:28Yeah
01:04:28Well wait till we hit up uncle sam for your services
01:04:31Really
01:04:32Now you want to save a city they go through me
01:04:34And we're gonna make millions
01:04:36Millions
01:04:36Millions
01:04:37Millions
01:04:37Millions
01:04:38I gotta go save the world
01:04:39All right i'm gonna make some calls
01:04:40Thanks my agent
01:04:41Now you came to me
01:04:42Now you came to me
01:04:42Now you came to me
01:04:43Now get him
01:04:44Now get him
01:04:45What's the number for san francisco
01:04:49She can drop 90 000 gallons of fire retardant on a target before you can call for more peanuts
01:04:56That good enough for you
01:04:58That'll be just fine
01:05:00This is gonna be a dangerous flight hell
01:05:04Man i've flown through stuff turned your butt whiter than you already are
01:05:08Ain't no spider gonna take me down
01:05:10No
01:05:11No
01:05:12This is not your average spider
01:05:15That's great
01:05:16But in my world if it's got eight legs it's a damn spider
01:05:22Now we're gonna keep wasting time talking
01:05:25And we're gonna go ahead and take her out
01:05:29We're gonna take her out
01:05:40Sir
01:05:43The missiles can't get through
01:05:45Well they'll target the ground near her feet maybe she'll sweep the leg
01:05:49We can't sir it's her heat signature
01:05:51Nothing's getting close
01:05:53The missiles are detonating before they can impact
01:05:55Colton was right
01:05:56She's too hot
01:05:57Well it's time for an alternative
01:05:59Alternative sir
01:06:00Get the president on the horn
01:06:02We just may have to nuke my little darling straight back to hell
01:06:06Sir if we do that you'll destroy the entire state
01:06:11Let's hope that's all
01:06:12Good people of florida
01:06:19Your state has come under attack
01:06:21From one of the worst menaces known to modern history
01:06:25A creature so heinous it can only come from the pits of hell
01:06:29And if we don't stop it millions of people will die
01:06:33And your great city will be reduced to ashes
01:06:36But not on my watch
01:06:38Do you know what people say about the great state of florida
01:06:41It's too humid
01:06:42Yeah yeah they actually do say that
01:06:45What does this angelino know about the great state of florida
01:06:49Florida is a state of winners
01:06:51Can you tell me what nfl team is the only team to be undefeated in history
01:06:58That's right the dolphins from 72
01:07:01And where did the king lebron james go to get his championship ring
01:07:07That's right miami
01:07:09And which state has the most beautiful beaches the hottest women the most golf courses
01:07:14And the only state to have no state income tax
01:07:17Alaska
01:07:19Nevada
01:07:20Huh south dakota's one
01:07:22Yeah
01:07:22It's true but arnie i'm trying to do a hero thing here
01:07:25You asked a question
01:07:26I know but give me a break
01:07:28When aliens come to visit which state do they choose
01:07:33Florida
01:07:36She's just kidding there are no aliens in florida
01:07:42I don't know anything about aliens but i do know
01:07:45When the united states of america sends a rocket into space
01:07:49They don't send it from oregon or south dakota or nevada they send it from
01:07:54Florida
01:07:55Florida
01:07:55I won this fight in los angeles and fate has brought me here to florida and together there's no way we're gonna lose
01:08:04Amen
01:08:05Amen
01:08:05Amen
01:08:06Yeah
01:08:07Tonight we win
01:08:08We win
01:08:09We win
01:08:09We win
01:08:10We win
01:08:11We win
01:08:11We win
01:08:12Yeah
01:08:13Yeah
01:08:15Yeah
01:08:15Yeah
01:08:17Yeah
01:08:17Yeah
01:08:18Yeah
01:08:18Yeah
01:08:19Yeah
01:08:20Yeah
01:08:20Yeah
01:08:21Yeah
01:08:21Yeah
01:08:22Yeah
01:08:22Somebody help me down
01:08:23I got you buddy
01:08:24I got you
01:08:24Thank you arnie
01:08:25I have to swing my legs down
01:08:27Okay then I'll go
01:08:28All right
01:08:28One
01:08:29Two
01:08:29Three
01:08:29Go
01:08:30Yo arnie
01:08:31Oh my god
01:08:32Colt
01:08:33If the missiles can't get close enough without detonating
01:08:35How are you gonna get close enough in the plane
01:08:38I got this sweetie
01:08:39You just stay here in the hangar
01:08:42I'll be back
01:08:46You better be back
01:08:48Promise
01:08:51Love you
01:08:54Let's go
01:08:56Spark it off
01:08:57Hey world
01:08:58Just sit over here
01:09:081-3 Philadelphia
01:09:10300,000 for Allentine
01:09:12Thanks
01:09:12Turn that on
01:09:14Continuing our live coverage now
01:09:15This catastrophic event
01:09:17Miami has been evacuated
01:09:19And the military continues to pound
01:09:22This enormous beast
01:09:23In what is now being called
01:09:25Arachnid freedom
01:09:26How
01:09:26How do we get close enough to that thing without being seen
01:09:29If you take her high enough
01:09:31The plane will free
01:09:33Mr. West
01:09:33Stand by for Colonel Jester
01:09:35Go
01:09:36How's it going Colonel
01:09:37I think you damn well know how it's going Mr. West
01:09:40Well don't you worry
01:09:41We got a plan that'll save us all
01:09:43Well we got our own plan
01:09:45No no no no
01:09:45You cannot nuke Miami sir
01:09:47That's insane
01:09:48Well who said anything about that
01:09:49I've made that movie
01:09:51And it always ends with nukes
01:09:52You just can't do it
01:09:53You gotta trust me on this one
01:09:55Sir
01:09:55We picked up a C-130 entering the restricted no-fly zone
01:10:00Colton is that you?
01:10:02Riding through restricted air zone
01:10:04You're gonna get yourself killed
01:10:06I'm trying to tell you we've got a plan
01:10:07But you gotta listen to me
01:10:09I've got 90,000 gallons of fire retardant that says I know what I'm doing
01:10:13I love all your films Colton
01:10:15But we're out of time for any Hollywood half-baked rewrites
01:10:18Look I took one of these things out without the military and without you
01:10:22And I'll be damned if I can't take another but I'm gonna need your hand
01:10:25The repeated military attacks on this enormous creature are failing to have their intended effect
01:10:41But we understand new reports are filtering in and you are hearing this correctly
01:10:45That Colton West is piloting a civilian aircraft into the hot zone
01:10:50Polar!
01:11:01You
01:11:02Get coming!
01:11:07Brace yourself!
01:11:11Damn!
01:11:12Marty are you guys all right back there?
01:11:18We're hit! I'll repeat, we're a hiccup!
01:11:20How about the damage?
01:11:22We're in a plane full of smoke? How about you think it is?
01:11:24It's bad! Very, very bad!
01:11:27Come on, Colton. No more screwing around here.
01:11:29Just hold on. I do not have time to hold on, and neither do you.
01:11:34We gotta get higher.
01:11:35Right now, I'm just hoping it stays together.
01:11:37If she sees us, it won't matter.
01:11:39Colton.
01:11:40Colonel, just trust me. Get your fighters in position.
01:11:43And wait for my mark.
01:11:44Colton, I don't think I can take her any higher.
01:11:46Come on! Come on!
01:11:52Oh, no! No, no! Oh, man! We're in a stall!
01:12:07He's so bad at this!
01:12:10Hey! Hey, we're going up there!
01:12:12Not good! This is not good!
01:12:14This is not good!
01:12:15Come on!
01:12:16Colton, the old plane is in a dead stall.
01:12:18I'm sorry, but it's time for my plan now.
01:12:21No! No new turtles!
01:12:23Don't turn us out yet!
01:12:28Marty, get the payload ready!
01:12:30Houston, we got a damn problem!
01:12:32What?
01:12:33Oh, he's right!
01:12:34The throttle mechanism is malfunctioning!
01:12:36The bay doors won't open!
01:12:38That's not good!
01:12:39Not good!
01:12:40Our odds are getting out of this saliva!
01:12:42Never tell me the odds!
01:12:43You get this plane out of a stall!
01:12:45And now, get the bay doors open!
01:12:48They're headed right for us, sir!
01:12:49That son of a bitch is going kamikaze on us!
01:13:03I got the controls back!
01:13:04I'm coming home, Elizabeth!
01:13:05Hal, open the bay doors!
01:13:06I can't!
01:13:07The mechanism is still fried, man!
01:13:08You gotta cut the hydraulic case!
01:13:09What do you mean?
01:13:10You can't drop the payload?
01:13:11We have no power at all!
01:13:12The only way this is going to work is manual!
01:13:13We gotta do it manual or we all die! Savvy?
01:13:14But wait!
01:13:15We gotta be closer!
01:13:16If we drop this now, it's just going to be a good one.
01:13:17It's just going to be a good one!
01:13:18Not ready!
01:13:19You got to be a good one!
01:13:20No.
01:13:21You got to be a good one!
01:13:22You got to be a bad guy!
01:13:23No!
01:13:24I've got to be a good one!
01:13:25It's going to be a good one!
01:13:26I've got to be a good one!
01:13:27I've got to be a good one!
01:13:28You got to be a good one!
01:13:29That's a good one!
01:13:30I've got to be a good one!
01:13:31work is manual we gotta do it manual or we all die savvy but wait we gotta be
01:13:35closer if we drop this now it's just going to disperse into nothing over
01:13:39Florida then I'm going down with it
01:13:49Kyle cut the table
01:13:54that red light in the sky that's for you honey you tell your mom and Wyatt
01:14:12I love you
01:14:16my boy
01:14:17hey calm down are you sure about this just like old times Marty damn
01:14:27let's go
01:14:29go get him baby
01:14:31yee-haw
01:14:33go go go go go
01:14:35let's go
01:14:37wow
01:14:49colonel we're getting intel that Colton West is doing a halo drop into the hot zone
01:14:53he what
01:14:58oh
01:15:11indiana jones got nothing over this guy
01:15:14spiders i hate spiders
01:15:28yeah
01:15:33what the hell's going on up there colonel hit her with all you got who's this no
01:15:41fire
01:15:52direct hit sir
01:15:54yes
01:15:58target is destroyed i repeat target is destroyed
01:16:08son of a bitch
01:16:10he did it again
01:16:14all right
01:16:14what about west sir
01:16:32he couldn't possibly have made it
01:16:42he does
01:16:43he did a good job
01:16:49good job man
01:16:53thank you
01:17:24Remember me?
01:17:38There's my buddy!
01:17:44Let me see here.
01:17:49Colonel!
01:17:50Colton West.
01:17:54Told you.
01:17:56We had a plan.
01:17:57Glad you made it.
01:17:58Yeah, well, thankfully I did.
01:18:00But the gargantula, she wasn't as lucky.
01:18:04She's terminated all right.
01:18:06It's a job well done, boy.
01:18:08Sorry I ever doubted you.
01:18:10You know what?
01:18:11I'm going to take my whole battalion to see your next movie.
01:18:15Twice.
01:18:16Well, thank you, General.
01:18:17It's Colonel.
01:18:18Whatever.
01:18:19My little girl.
01:18:20I love you, Dad.
01:18:21I love you, too.
01:18:22Wait a minute.
01:18:23You call me Dad.
01:18:24That's the sweetest thing you could say to me.
01:18:25Deal with it.
01:18:26Gladly.
01:18:27And you cannot tell your mom about any of this.
01:18:30Dad, it's all over the news.
01:18:32No.
01:18:33I guess she's used to it.
01:18:34All right.
01:18:35Just remember, guys.
01:18:36It doesn't matter if you win by an inch or a lava landslide.
01:18:39Winning's winning!
01:18:40Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
01:18:45Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha
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