00:00Lisa Rowland, do you take John Dawson to be your lawful husband?
00:08Liar! You said that I was the love of your life! That you would marry me! How could you break your vow?
00:34Who are you? I... this crazy... I don't know this crazy lady!
00:38No? What about Leach?
00:48You cheated on me?
00:51No!
00:52We're done.
00:54Lisa, wait. No, Le... Lisa, I don't... That's not...
00:58Somebody stop them!
01:00They pay, I slay. As you can see, I'm a gig worker. The gig, revenge for Hyde. Just saved an innocent girl from one of the scumbags at the top of my hate list.
01:22Yeah!
01:28Scratch that. The one I hate most? Benjamin freaking Sparrow.
01:34Quarterback for the Washington Badgers.
01:38He's a dirty cheat who snatched the wind from my favorite player.
01:42He's a dirty cheat rat.
01:43He's a dirty researcher. Thanks, Seanawise.
01:46He Housing! He's a wildlife member. He's a really lazy guy.
01:48Also, you are working against him fall.
01:50Have a happy moment.
01:55What about THE rules?
01:56At the country of The polsk on September?
01:59How are we playedmen?
02:00What about the two things we're discussing,
02:02The carson attended the stairs were in a fantasy university.
02:03I love you!
02:18Incredible play, Benjamin. Those girls in the stands, they're going to eat you alive.
02:22Forget the girls, Coach. All I need right now is shower.
02:33God, I think I turned into this shit.
02:50Uh...
02:52This is...
02:54Benjamin Sparrow's jersey.
03:00Oh!
03:01Hm.
03:04Well...
03:05Tough luck, buddy.
03:07Hard times.
03:27Sorry.
03:28Wait a second, this is my room!
03:31What are you doing in my room?
03:37Hey, that's my jersey!
03:38Fuck!
03:39Fuck!
03:46What is this?
03:51Steve!
03:52Come back here!
03:53What?
03:54What?
03:59Jesus Christ!
04:00Got you!
04:01Delete it, man. I'll pay you, alright?
04:03You rivals offer me more.
04:05Guys, that's gonna kill me.
04:07I don't care who you are, or where you're hiding.
04:19I'm gonna find you, and you'll pay for this.
04:26Yeah, I'll hear what the hell I want, alright, buddy?
04:30What?!
04:33What?
04:38What?
04:39E-
04:40E-
04:42Benjamin Sparrow.
04:43Benjamin Sparrow, Mrs. Justin.
04:53I'm gonna drag you through hell.
04:56I know, Mr. Bayer! I'll catch up on rent by the end of the month. I just need more time.
05:05How the hell am I supposed to pay rent and cover my family's medical bills by the end of the month?
05:13God? If you're listening, maybe drop ten million dollars my way?
05:23Uh, hey?
05:38What are you doing?
05:43This is my house! Get out!
05:51Are you feeling a little nervous?
05:53Naughty or neither?
05:54Let me tell you something. Your hospitality is just as awful as your taste.
05:59Which seems to be absolute shit.
06:01Get out or I'm calling the cops for trespassing.
06:06Oh, you're gonna call the cops. Go ahead. That's perfect timing. I'll be suing you for theft and defamation.
06:11You will be sued for theft and defamation. And don't forget about the reputational damage. And the emotional damage. You're getting sued for ten million dollars.
06:19Ten million?
06:20Yeah.
06:21That's ridiculous!
06:22Hey, buddy. It's 2025. If you want to wear a dress, you don't have to lie about it.
06:30If you want to be mad at someone, be mad at the reporters. It's not my fault. Sue them for your reputational damage. Not me.
06:40Not your fault.
06:44I dare you. I dare you! Say it again!
06:49It's not your fault.
06:58Hey, you paused this mess. Now you're acting like a victim? You're gonna pay for this. Do you understand?
07:02Do you understand?
07:03No!
07:04Hell no!
07:05Get over here!
07:06Stop!
07:07Get over here!
07:08What are you doing?
07:09No!
07:10What the hell was that?
07:27Hey, my boy. Is everything okay?
07:32Yes, mother.
07:33Saw the news. Is that why you keep rejecting all the matches I set up for you? Because you're...
07:39Slow down. Slow down. What are you... Look, what are you talking about? I...
07:43It's all gonna be fixed very soon. Very soon. Look, I gotta go. Alright? Bye.
07:47Marry me? Or pay me ten million dollars? Those are your two choices.
08:03Those are your two choices.
08:05Marry you? In your dreams?
08:10Maybe, if you had the face of Paris, I'd consider it.
08:14That guy plays Danny on the field. What's so great about him?
08:20Well, that's too bad for you. Because you have two choices. Marry me. Or pay up.
08:29That's not fair. All I did was steal your jersey.
08:32Yeah, and I got caught on camera. And now my reputation is screwed. I'm the laughing stock.
08:37Okay.
08:38People think that I am confused about my sexuality. My family is worried sick.
08:42And this is the mess that you've caused.
08:45Okay, well...
08:47Look. Here's the deal. Marry me for one year. And I'll pay you five million dollars.
08:53I mean, you're a gig worker, right? You take whatever job comes your way as long as the money's good. Right?
08:59Five million? Is God really listening? That would cover my rent for Grandma's medical bills.
09:05Fine. Deal.
09:06Perfect.
09:07Ow! Ow!
09:08This one.
09:09Excellent choice, sir. That is a rare Asher cut with flawless clarity.
09:12So...
09:13Valued at three million. There's only two in the world. The other one is with a royal wife and a very discerning.
09:17Uh, that's way too expensive. Do you have like a cheaper one? Something...
09:18What?
09:19What?
09:20What?
09:21What?
09:22What?
09:23What?
09:24Something less expensive? Oh two hundred dollars.
09:25That's asst.
09:26That's a Cost.
09:27Whoa.
09:28Oh...
09:29What?
09:32All right.
09:34I'm getting ahold of...
09:36What?
09:37One.
09:38Good?
09:39What?
09:40Valued at three million. There's only two in the world.
09:41The other one is with a royal wife and a very disuelle number.
09:44that's way too expensive do you have like a cheaper one something less expensive a couple hundred
09:49dollars you're funny people will think i'm broke can we try this one oh yes and i'll get something
10:03very nice for you to try on mr sparrow i'll see you in a bit all right thanks
10:14i'm actually marrying my idol's arch enemy this can't be real right am i dreaming
10:28cause baby it's like a light storm
10:44to be your words finding freedom in the downpour
10:56you're like a light storm
10:58oh very beautiful
11:17i can you help tie it yeah
11:27oh that is so sweet you look absolutely perfect together such a stunning couple
11:33no no we're not oh oh my hair
11:38what is this oh just let me fix it
11:56um thanks
12:01let's go home
12:05first party b shall not covet party a's body or engage in any physical contact
12:11second during cohabitation party b must protect party a's reputation and remain loyal and faithful
12:16third what the hell is this
12:19it's a marriage contract
12:21i'll sign it
12:22i already did
12:35fine can i go now
12:36hold on where do you think you're going we're living together from now on you're coming home with me
12:42i have to get my things
12:49okay well then i'm coming with you
12:53well i don't want anything related to paris smith in my house
12:56not a single thing
12:58i don't want to
12:59i don't want to
13:05i don't want to
13:07get your shoes off
13:08come in if you want just don't touch anything
13:10don't touch anything
13:12Shit!
13:36Sorry, that thing came out of nowhere.
13:38I thought it was Chucky.
13:43Dare you!
13:45Hey, ow!
13:45God!
13:46Jesus!
13:46Stop it!
13:47I said I'm sorry!
13:52Murderer!
13:57My poor pity!
14:00You named that thing?
14:02You'd fucking break.
14:03Ow!
14:05Yeah, don't worry.
14:06I'm leaving.
14:07All this perish toxicity levels are driving me crazy.
14:09I can't even breathe.
14:11Sorry for your loss.
14:12I'm sorry.
14:31I'll clean this all up, right?
14:32I'm sorry.
14:37Ah!
14:38God!
14:39God!
14:40Please!
14:40Jesus!
14:41Jesus!
14:41Don't freak out.
14:52Do not freak out.
14:53I'll pay for all of this, all right?
14:54I'll pay for all of this, all right?
14:58Oh, you're dead!
14:59Hey!
15:00Hey!
15:00Hey!
15:00God!
15:03Dad!
15:03This is not over!
15:14Oh my god!
15:18Oh my god!
15:20Shhh!
15:22It's okay!
15:24It's okay baby!
15:33She's kinda cute!
15:41I'm so sorry!
15:43Until next time!
15:46Oh god!
15:50Come on!
15:52Hey!
16:02Bitch!
16:05Bitch!
16:08Bitch!
16:10Who the hell are you?
16:15Wait, no!
16:16Fucking bitch!
16:17You ruined my wedding!
16:18Lisa left me because of you!
16:20You cheated!
16:21You deserve this, bastard!
16:23Get away from me!
16:24I'm calling cops!
16:25Stop pretending to be some saint!
16:29Um...
16:30Yeah, I'll just do two strawberries, please.
16:34You're just a gig worker.
16:36You'll do anything for money, so drop the act, huh?
