00:00Let's make baka! Let's not takot!
00:08Opo, yan po ang sigaw ko ngayong gabing ito.
00:11Because andito ko ngayon upang tayo ay magsama-sama,
00:16tayo ay magtipon-tipon upang ating eliminate, eradicate,
00:21at exterminate ang mga judgments.
00:24Because I am your certified Jeje Buster.
00:32Ano ang point na ipinaglaban niyo, Serizal, at ni Andres Bonifacio, ang wika natin,
00:41kung mga Jeje Mons tayan ay bababuyin lang ating mga wika.
00:46My God, I could first, I could really imagine the first time I ever got a message from a Jeje Mons.
00:51Pag-uha ko, pag-basa ko, naloka ko.
00:54Nag-palpitate ako, nag-init ang ulo ko.
00:58Pag-basa ko, hindi ko maintindihan.
01:00Akala ko napasok ko ng frequency ng mga aliens ang cellphone, cellphone, cellphone ko.
01:08Bago, bago, bago.
01:10Hindi ko maintindihan.
01:12Nung pinabasa ko, nakakaloka.
01:14Ano ba itong mga to?
01:15May mga pandisalba sa bibig? May mga tipos?
01:18Hindi ka maintindihan?
01:19Ito ang first message.
01:22Buti na safe ko.
01:24Ang sabi,
01:26Nyo po.
01:28Gusto kayo.
01:30How you know?
01:32Ang...
01:33Je, je, je.
01:37What's even a je, je, je?
01:41He.
01:42Tumatawas nila?
01:43Je, je, je.
01:44Eh kung malungkot?
01:45Juju, ju.
01:47Kung bagong panganak?
01:49Jawa, jawa, jawa.
01:50Nakakaloka.
01:54Ano bang problema sa mga laptop nyo?
01:56Tsaka sa mga cellphones siyo?
01:58Pataga-alter kayo ng mga letters.
02:00Tsaka sobra ba ang letters sa mga laptop nyo?
02:03Sampu ba ang O?
02:0542 ba ang W?
02:07At 137 ba ang Z?
02:11Dahil gamit na gamit nyo ito?
02:12You know what scares me a lot, mga friends, mga social friends ko?
02:16Who what?
02:17Dumadami sila.
02:18Then multiplying by the second.
02:21And what scares me is that,
02:23what if na-penetrate nila ang show business?
02:26Ang broadcasting?
02:28Paano pa naging broadcaster sila?
02:30Ganito sila mag-news?
02:32Ulo ng mga balita.
02:34Isang G-heave.
02:36At isang boo-hoos.
02:37Nag-isang buhukahan.
02:40Mmm!
02:42Diba?
02:44Nakakaloka.
02:45At papaano pa naging singer sila?
02:48Bakit ina-alter ang H sa J?
02:51Paano mag-ayari?
02:53Paano ang kanta ni Lyle Richie na Hello?
02:54Magiging Jello?
02:57Ang Wensi Kortehong,
02:59Habang May Buhay?
03:01Jabang May Bujay?
03:03At yung favorite ko,
03:07Ni Noy Noy Zuniga,
03:10Nakumusta ka?
03:13Musta you?
03:15How na you?
03:17Kain na you?
03:18At hindi lang yan,
03:22Naku,
03:23Mga friends kong sosyal,
03:24Pati outfit,
03:25My God,
03:26May outfit ang mga dredge mods.
03:29Nagka-cap,
03:30Pero hindi sinusuot.
03:32Pinapatong lang,
03:33E pwes ko,
03:33Ipapatong lang pala,
03:34E di sana pinatong mo,
03:35Plato,
03:36Kaya paso.
03:36At sila lang,
03:39So, sobrang colorful nila,
03:41Kaya nilang magsuot
03:42ng primary,
03:43secondary,
03:44at tertiary color
03:45sa isang outfit.
03:46Nakakaloka.
03:48At alam nyo,
03:48ang balita ko ha,
03:49Ang mga judgments daw,
03:52Ang mga jologs,
03:53na pasosyal.
03:55That's not true.
03:57That's not true.
03:58Because ang mga sosyal,
03:59they do not add letters.
04:01They omit letters,
04:03like me.
04:04You don't say connecticut,
04:06you see?
04:06Connecticut.
04:08You don't say Illinois,
04:09you say Illinois.
04:11You don't say Green Hills,
04:13you say Green Hill.
04:15You don't say Alabama,
04:16you say Alabama.
04:18My name,
04:18E p, E p,
04:19that, that, no.
04:20Diba masosyal?
04:25Eto,
04:26nagiring ang phone ko.
04:27May nagiring ang...
04:27Hello?
04:32Eyo?
04:33Oh my God.
04:35Eyo?
04:35I cannot underst...
04:37Are you a jegemon?
04:38May yon keo.
04:41Hindi kita maintindihan.
04:42Are you a jegemon?
04:44Eyo?
04:45I cannot understand.
04:48I cannot understand.
04:49Sino to?
04:51Eyo?
04:52Hava...
04:53Hava...
04:54Ha-va-fez-mu-ka-va-yu.
04:59Wait, wait, wait, wait, how do I understand that?
05:02Ha-va-fez-mu-ka-va-yu.
05:07Don't turn your ear off, huh?
05:08You're not a jegemon, you're a jegemon.
05:10This is for you.
05:14See?
05:15I told you, I warned you, one jegemon at a time.
05:20The next time, when there's a jegemon,
05:23who you gonna call?
05:27Jege Buster.
05:30Yay!
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