00:00Hi, I'm Stefan Grobe.
00:02I want to talk to you about Donald Trump's trade war with Europe.
00:06Yes, again.
00:07You know that the European Union is scrambling to find something, anything, to throw at him in future negotiations.
00:15Something that can sway him, that can change his mind.
00:18Because, as you know, so far he doesn't budge.
00:22So here's my idea.
00:24Let's give him something that he desperately wants and that Europe could offer him.
00:28And that is prison space.
00:32Yes, you heard that right.
00:34Remember that mega prison in El Salvador where he deported hundreds of undocumented migrants?
00:40Now that prison is becoming too small for Trump's vision because he wants to incarcerate U.S. criminals there as well.
00:47Really, really bad people, as he told the Salvadorian president.
00:51So, domestic criminals in foreign jails?
00:54Is that even legally possible?
00:56Well, we're looking into that.
00:58Trump said.
01:00Apparently, that legal research hasn't brought any clear answer yet because Trump was then looking at rebuilding Alcatraz.
01:08Remember Alcatraz?
01:09Burt Lancaster?
01:10Clint Eastwood?
01:12Yes, that famous prison island in San Francisco Bay.
01:15In other words, he needs more prison space.
01:19And here's where the EU comes in.
01:22Because if it's island prisons Trump is looking for, Europe has plenty to offer.
01:27However, I know of three.
01:29Let's start with the Chateau d'Ife off the coast of Marseille.
01:34You know the Count of Monte Cristo and all that?
01:36It would need some serious patching up, but Trump would need to deal with his pal Emmanuel Macron and not with Brussels bureaucrats or the obnoxious Germans.
01:47Then there is Devil's Island, also French, but off the coast of French Guayana in South America, closer to Trump.
01:56Remember, Henri Charrier wrote the best-selling novel Papillon about his successful escape from there.
02:01Devil's Island would also need some serious rebuilding, but it's okay.
02:06Trump is saving a lot of money right now.
02:08And finally, a place called Goli Otok, also a former prison island off the coast of Croatia.
02:15It used to be a prison camp under Tito, but today it's in ruins, a little like Alcatraz.
02:22Goli Otok means barren island, because it's completely devoid of vegetation.
02:28You get the idea.
02:29So, if this prisons for tariffs pitch fails, Europe could point Trump to the criminal justice system in the Netherlands,
02:36where the prison population shrank drastically over the past 20 years.
02:41Why?
02:42Largely because of rehabilitation efforts.
02:45Some empty prisons have even been repurposed as hotels.
02:49And this might appeal to the real estate mogul in Trump.
02:55Thanks for watching.
02:57See you soon.
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