00:00Welcome to the vibrant city of Montreal, a city steeped in rich history and adorned with iconic landmarks that tell tales of its past.
00:08Which you might actually get to see while you're avoiding potholes, or on a construction detour, or enjoying the most bipolar weather in Canada.
00:16I'm Alex Malki, and we're about to find out what ChadCPT thinks are the top 5 main attractions in Montreal.
00:22I feel like it's gonna suck.
00:24Our first stop is Mount Royal, from which the city takes its name.
00:28This majestic mountain offers breathtaking views and is a symbol of Montreal's heritage.
00:33Designed by Frederic Law Olmsted, the renowned landscape architect behind New York's Central Park, Mount Royal is a beloved retreat for locals and visitors alike.
00:43Alright, I'm gonna stop you right there, because this is already wrong.
00:45Freddie Law designed Mount Royal Park, not Mount Royal. How do you design a mountain?
00:49And listen, locals wouldn't even call it a mountain, they'd call it a really big hill.
00:53A hill that when you get to the top of it, you're greeted with three things.
00:56One, feral tourists all time of year, summer, winter, doesn't matter.
01:00Giant but adorable raccoons, and admittedly, the best view of the Montreal skyline.
01:05Now look, it is a bitch to go up those stairs in the summer, but when you get to the top and you see that view, it's worth sweating your ass off for.
01:12Our next landmark is the iconic Notre Dame Basilica.
01:15This architectural masterpiece stands as a testament to Montreal's rich religious history.
01:21Its gothic revival style and vibrant stained glass windows have captivated worshippers and art enthusiasts for centuries.
01:29I bet you 90% of Montrealers have taken a picture in front of this church, but have never stepped foot inside of it, which is a damn shame.
01:36Because other than being a backdrop of Celine Dion's wedding, which, you know, whatever, it's actually beautiful inside.
01:41And it is the coolest place to watch a light projector show, I'm not really sure how to describe it, but it's dope.
01:47And here's what you do, you pop into an SQDC, buy yourself some legal edibles, and maybe you have yourself a religious experience.
01:54The fun kind, not the died-for-your-sins kind, you know?
01:57Crossing over the mighty St. Lawrence River, we find the magnificent Jacques Cartier Bridge.
02:02Named after the French explorer who claimed Canada for France, this iconic bridge has connected the island of Montreal to its south shore since 1930,
02:12serving as a vital transportation link and a symbol of unity.
02:16Listen, anybody that calls the Jacques Cartier a landmark has probably never left their hometown or the West Island.
02:22It's at best a C-tier Golden Gate Bridge that for some reason the city has decided to slap on a bunch of lights like it's a Christmas tree?
02:29I don't get it. And listen, they're probably gonna have to rename it in a couple years when JC gets cancelled, so don't get too attached.
02:34Steeped in history, the Old Port of Montreal is a vibrant district that traces its roots back to the city's early days.
02:41Originally a bustling trading hub, it now offers a perfect blend of old-world charm and modern entertainment.
02:48From its cobblestone streets to its waterfront promenades, the Old Port is a testament to Montreal's enduring spirit.
02:55If I hear the words cobblestone streets one more goddamn time, I'm gonna lose my mind.
02:59The Old Port, and Old Montreal in general, is Europe for people who have never been to Europe, and a very expensive first date.
03:06I learned that the hard way. But listen, if you're gonna be in the Old Port, at least go over a block in Old Montreal, do a little digging,
03:12find yourself some cool spots like El PequeƱo or Cauldron, which are conveniently right next to each other.
03:17Not that sad stretch of sand they call a beach.
03:20Last but not least, we arrive at the awe-inspiring Olympic Stadium.
03:24Constructed for the 1976 Summer Olympics, its iconic inclined tower and retractable roof have become symbols of the city.
03:32Today, the stadium hosts sporting events, concerts, and exhibitions, leaving a lasting legacy of athletic excellence and architectural grandeur.
03:40Big O? More like Big Waste of Money. I'm sorry, that was terrible. I am so sorry.
03:44But listen, does it look cool? Yes. Objectively, it's awesome. It looks like a giant spaceship.
03:48Does it do anything? Nah, it's just kinda there, all the time, just staring at you like a giant hairy mole on your face.
03:54But right next to that hairy mole is the biodome, and the planetarium, and the insectarium, and the botanical garden,
03:59all of which are way more worth your time and money.
04:02And if you have any more of those edibles left over, now's the time to gobble them down.
04:06Montreal's landmarks stand as pillars of the city's past, present, and future.
04:11They embody the diverse cultures, the resilience of its people, and the desire to create a city that merges tradition with innovation.
04:19Join us in Montreal, and immerse yourself in the stories woven within these five magnificent landmarks.
04:25Discover the magic, embrace the history, and let the spirit of this remarkable city captivate your heart.
04:31For more information that can actually help you find fun things to do and great places to eat, check out MTLBlog.com.
04:36It's a website. We had to have those before TikTok.
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