Gregg Rogell: Balloon Animals | movie | 2024 | Official Clip - video Dailymotion

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Do all balloon animals actually look like male genitals? Gregg Rogell is the master of the slow burn as he twists and st | dG1fU1ZsNlhMRVFPb2M

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00:00You know how Wikipedia makes its money?

00:02It begs for charity over the holidays.

00:04I'm not giving Wikipedia my money.

00:06Wikipedia is one of the most widely used services on the internet.

00:10It's not my fault they have a poorer business model than Candy Crush.

00:13Get your shit together.

00:17Candy Crush makes $600,000 a day.

00:20Look it up.

00:22On Wikipedia.

00:30They want my charity.

00:32Sorry, St. Jude Children's Hospital.

00:34No money left over for you this Christmas.

00:36I had to bail out Wikipedia.

00:40There's a lot of money in ad revenue these days.

00:42How come ad revenue is only limited to the media?

00:45Why can't we lower healthcare costs by running ads at the doctor's office?

00:49We found polyps on your x-ray.

00:52Ba-da-bum-bum-bum.

00:55This botched colonoscopy was brought to you by ShamWow.

00:59The number one doctor's choice for mopping up botched colonoscopies.

01:04I hate going to the doctor.

01:06I also had vaccine hesitancy

01:08ever since the booster gave my girlfriend chlamydia.

01:16And my best friend.

01:17I mean, that can't be a coincidence.

01:20Nah, you anti-vaxxers are hypocrites.

01:22If you got tattooed at the mall, you can get vaccinated.

01:30I didn't have any vaccine hesitancy.

01:32And I'm generally leery of Big Pharma.

01:34Big Pharma will tell you to never mix drugs with alcohol,

01:37but stringent real-world testing has shown it's a pretty good time.

01:44I'm not a big fan of the big pharma.

01:47Their drug commercials are frightening.

01:49Live life psoriasis-free.

01:51This drug may cause cancer.

01:53What?

01:56Don't take NERDTECH if you're allergic to NERDTECH.

02:05How the hell am I supposed to know if I'm allergic to NERDTECH?

02:08You can't just create something and then if it kills me, he was allergic.

02:16Should've watched the commercial.

02:20Nah, you can't always trust the experts these days.

02:23For years the experts have been telling us that marijuana makes you paranoid,

02:27but legalized marijuana doesn't make you paranoid.

02:30As soon as you remove the prospect of getting busted,

02:33paranoia levels drop substantially.

02:42Edibles make me paranoid.

02:44I'm not worried about cops when I'm on edibles.

02:46I'm worried about monsters.

02:50I think anything in moderation is fine.

02:53Like I find a couple of shots of tequila really takes the edge off of my road rage.

03:00Tequila's a strange drunk.

03:02You can get blackout drunk on scotch,

03:04wake up in some strange place, look at your wallet,

03:06and be like, how did I spend all my money last night?

03:09With tequila, you can wake up in some strange place,

03:11look at your wallet, and be like,

03:13how the fuck did I make $1,200 last night?

Gregg Rogell: Balloon Animals | movie | 2024 | Official Clip

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