- 2 years ago
The phrase "nearest and dearest" often evokes a sense of warmth, family, and close relationships. It's a term that brings to mind the people we hold closest to our hearts—our family, friends, and loved ones. However, in the context of British television, "Nearest and Dearest" takes on a different meaning, referring to a classic sitcom that captured the hearts of many.
"Nearest and Dearest" was a British television sitcom that aired from 1968 to 1973. The show starred Hylda Baker and Jimmy Jewel as Nellie and Eli Pledge, siblings who inherit their father's pickle business in Colne, Lancashire. The series was known for its humor derived from the characters' squabbles, malapropisms, and the unique dynamics of a family-run business.
The premise of the show was simple yet effective: Nellie, a hard-working spinster, and Eli, a womanizing slacker, must run the family business together to inherit their father's fortune. This setup led to comedic situations and memorable catchphrases that are still recognized by fans of classic British comedy.
Despite the on-screen chemistry between Baker and Jewel, it was widely reported that the two did not get along off-screen, adding a layer of intrigue to the show's history. Their tumultuous relationship is often cited as one of the most toxic in British sitcom history.
"Nearest and Dearest" also serves as a cultural touchstone, reflecting the era's social norms and the changing landscape of British comedy. It's a show that, while rooted in the 1960s and 70s, continues to find new audiences who appreciate its wit and charm.
For those who grew up watching "Nearest and Dearest," the show remains a nostalgic reminder of a bygone era of television. And for newcomers, it offers a glimpse into the rich tapestry of British humor and the timeless appeal of family dynamics in storytelling.
Whether you're revisiting the series or discovering it for the first time, "Nearest and Dearest" stands as a testament to the enduring nature of well-crafted comedy and the universal themes of family and ambition. It's a piece of television history that continues to be nearest and dearest to many viewers' hearts.
Listen to our radio station Old Time Radio https://link.radioking.com/otradio
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Remember that times have changed, and some shows might not reflect the standards of today’s politically correct society. The shows do not necessarily reflect the views, standards, or beliefs of Entertainment Radio
"Nearest and Dearest" was a British television sitcom that aired from 1968 to 1973. The show starred Hylda Baker and Jimmy Jewel as Nellie and Eli Pledge, siblings who inherit their father's pickle business in Colne, Lancashire. The series was known for its humor derived from the characters' squabbles, malapropisms, and the unique dynamics of a family-run business.
The premise of the show was simple yet effective: Nellie, a hard-working spinster, and Eli, a womanizing slacker, must run the family business together to inherit their father's fortune. This setup led to comedic situations and memorable catchphrases that are still recognized by fans of classic British comedy.
Despite the on-screen chemistry between Baker and Jewel, it was widely reported that the two did not get along off-screen, adding a layer of intrigue to the show's history. Their tumultuous relationship is often cited as one of the most toxic in British sitcom history.
"Nearest and Dearest" also serves as a cultural touchstone, reflecting the era's social norms and the changing landscape of British comedy. It's a show that, while rooted in the 1960s and 70s, continues to find new audiences who appreciate its wit and charm.
For those who grew up watching "Nearest and Dearest," the show remains a nostalgic reminder of a bygone era of television. And for newcomers, it offers a glimpse into the rich tapestry of British humor and the timeless appeal of family dynamics in storytelling.
Whether you're revisiting the series or discovering it for the first time, "Nearest and Dearest" stands as a testament to the enduring nature of well-crafted comedy and the universal themes of family and ambition. It's a piece of television history that continues to be nearest and dearest to many viewers' hearts.
Listen to our radio station Old Time Radio https://link.radioking.com/otradio
Listen to other Shows at My Classic Radio https://www.myclassicradio.net/
Entertainment Radio | Broadcasting Classic Radio Shows | Patreon
Remember that times have changed, and some shows might not reflect the standards of today’s politically correct society. The shows do not necessarily reflect the views, standards, or beliefs of Entertainment Radio
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FunTranscript
00:00P584 stroke five nearest and dearest take one
00:30P584 stroke five nearest and dearest take one
00:42Is it all right?
01:00What's all right?
01:01Well, I'm starting, I mean, this meeting.
01:04What about Miss Nellie?
01:05You leave our Nellie to me.
01:07She won't like it.
01:08She'll know no doubt about it, will she?
01:10What the eye never hears...
01:12No, wait a minute, wait a minute.
01:15What the heart never sees and the ear never...
01:18No, no, no, no, hang on, hang on.
01:21What the ear never sees and the eyes never grieves,
01:25the heart never hears.
01:26Thank you, Berta and Russell.
01:27Now, can we make a start?
01:28Yeah, the floor's yours.
01:29Now, I've called this extraordinary meeting
01:33to discuss our great financial position.
01:36I as the managing director represent the management
01:39and you two represent Labour.
01:41I bloody don't, I'm a Tory.
01:44Not Harold Wilson's Labour, Labour, Labour.
01:47As opposed to management, do you understand?
01:49No.
01:50Oh, I'll have to have him put down.
01:53We represent the lads.
01:55Oh, well, I don't mind doing that.
01:57Right, now, I've been going through the figures
02:00and for the past 12 weeks, we've been losing money steadily.
02:03We've got to have a complete change of policy.
02:05Now, I suggest we scrub the 12 results
02:07and put all the money on the treble chants.
02:09That's a very good idea, young Eli, and I'm in favour.
02:13How about you?
02:15Oi, Cheyenne.
02:16What?
02:17Are you in favour of it?
02:19Oh, yes, I'm in favour of it.
02:20Right, that's carried unanimously.
02:21Now, the next item on the agenda are the bankers.
02:24I suggest Liverpool and Chelsea in the first division
02:27and Pompey and Bolton Wanderers in the second division.
02:30And we've got to up our production, you know,
02:32and capture more of the overseas market.
02:34Oh, hello, Nellie.
02:36So, this is your reproductivity meeting.
02:38Productivity?
02:39Oh, and a bonnie lot you look to.
02:41For your...? The gnomes of Cologne.
02:44For your information, we've had a very profitable meeting.
02:46Oh, no, we haven't. We've got two more draws to go.
02:49Shut up!
02:50Very profitable meeting.
02:53There's no harm in having a little wager.
02:55I'm on a winning streak.
02:56Winning streak?
02:57You lost two pounds last week
02:59when you bet the Archbishop of Canterbury
03:01would be the next Pope.
03:04Well, I've done very well at the dog track.
03:05Oh, I know you've done very well there.
03:07I mean, after all, they've called the rabbit after you, haven't they?
03:10Well, I can't help it if I'm a sporting type, can I?
03:12Oh, no, you were very much a sporting type
03:14at the Labour Club the other night.
03:15You and Stan, betting on two pickled onions.
03:18Well, it was a new kind of game.
03:20Oh, it was a new kind of game, all right.
03:22Putting two pickled onions down a girl's blouse
03:25and betting five pounds which one would wriggle its way down
03:27and drop on the floor first.
03:30How was I to know that my onion would refuse at the first hurdle?
03:35Well, anybody could see it wasn't a flat race.
03:39Here, gamble your way through that.
03:42What is all this?
03:43It's the end of the month, stock-taking.
03:45I'm doing no stock-taking.
03:46Standing out there counting cucumbers.
03:48You, I'm going to see you in that gherkin shed
03:52with your jacket off counting every single gherkin.
03:57And you, get your pitchfork
03:59and pitch into those pickly pickles
04:01in that pickly pickling shed.
04:05What the hell do you want?
04:07I've come to see you as manager at Transport Department.
04:11Transport Department?
04:13You're getting delusions of grandeur, aren't you?
04:15Well, I'm the head of transport.
04:17Our transport consists of a broken-down car
04:20to clapped-out horse and you.
04:22Transport, you make it sound like British Railways.
04:25Anyway, what do you want?
04:26A.
04:27I said, what do you want?
04:29A.
04:30Are you going bloody deaf? I said, what do you want?
04:32A for the horse, A.
04:35Oh, hey. Hi.
04:36Oh, well, I'm Eldon, your sister-in-law.
04:40I'll get you, I'll order you some.
04:42Oh, tar.
04:43Hey, well, I'll not delay you, young Eli.
04:46You'll want to get on with stock-taking.
04:48I've got news for you.
04:50I'm not doing any bloody stock-taking.
04:52Miss Nellie won't like that.
04:53She will if I play me card right.
04:55How do you mean?
04:56I'm going to appeal to her maternal instincts.
04:59By the time I finish with her,
05:01she'll not only want me not to do any stock-taking,
05:03she'll be tucking me up in bed for a day.
05:05Hey, you still here?
05:07Get gone.
05:08Oh.
05:09And you, come on, get, stir yourself.
05:11Oh, all right, Nellie.
05:12What's the matter with you?
05:13Oh, it's nothing, it's just a pounding in me head, you know.
05:15Oh, it'll go when you get into that gherkin shed.
05:17Vinegar fumes will shift it.
05:19Ah.
05:20I'm all right.
05:21Oh, oh, dear.
05:22Now what's to do?
05:23Oh, oh, nothing, it'll go.
05:24What is it?
05:25It's a pain, a pain.
05:26I think I've got a grumbling appendix.
05:28Well, if it's where you've got your hand,
05:30it's not grumbling, it's bloody rambling.
05:33Hey, I think I've got an ulcer.
05:36An ulcer?
05:37Yeah.
05:38More like it's wind.
05:39A good dose of biclamforate or soda will do you, won't it?
05:44I need a temperature, that's what I need.
05:46Where's the first one?
05:47Here you are.
05:50It's vomiting out.
05:51We'll, er, just hot it up a bit.
05:56Here we are.
05:57Oh!
05:59It's bloody cold now.
06:02108, that should be right.
06:04Hot that down a bit.
06:08Here you are, then.
06:09Get this down you.
06:10Just a minute.
06:12What are you sucking?
06:13I'm taking my temperature.
06:14Taking your temperature?
06:16Mm.
06:17Oh, Eli, you're becoming a proper hyper cataract.
06:21There's nothing wrong with you.
06:22Ah, probably you're right.
06:23103 is normal, isn't it?
06:25All you need...
06:26You what?
06:27103.
06:29Hey.
06:30What?
06:31What are you doing here?
06:32Huh?
06:33Gee heck, you're not well.
06:34I'm not well.
06:35Oh, no, how do you feel?
06:37Well, apart from the pounding in me head and the pain and the dizziness, I'll be all right.
06:41I'd better be on me way.
06:42No, no, no.
06:43Now, no, not in your condition.
06:45Oh, well, as long as I can just stop on me feet, I'll be...
06:47Now, now, don't try and be brave.
06:48No, no, no.
06:49You know, I've got all that stock-taking to do, Nelly.
06:51I'll go and do it.
06:52No, no, I couldn't let you do the stock-taking now.
06:54I mean, you're at that funny age.
06:55Am I?
06:56You know, we don't want you having a coloury, do we?
06:59Besides, you know, we haven't paid for me dad's headstone yet.
07:06I don't want to be a burden, Nelly.
07:08Oh, don't say that.
07:09What?
07:10I can hear me dad now.
07:12Upstairs, in that room, lay lying on that bed.
07:15I don't want to be a burden, he said.
07:18And 24 hours later, they were lowering him down.
07:21Were they?
07:22Come on, to bed, you.
07:23Well, I don't want to be a nuisance.
07:25You're not a nuisance, you're poorly sick.
07:27Am I?
07:28Yes, it is.
07:29Now, come on.
07:30I want no arguments.
07:31Get off to bed now.
07:32Come on, put your arm round my shoulder.
07:33No, I can manage.
07:34I can manage.
07:35Come on, I'll help you now.
07:36Do as you're told.
07:37Well, if it'll please you.
07:38That's it.
07:39Good work.
07:40He'd have broke me back.
07:41Come on, give us a lift.
07:42Not me, you fatted.
07:43That's right.
07:44I'm going to put him to bed.
07:45He's not well, you know.
07:46I'm not well, you know.
07:47Oh, that's all right.
07:48I'm not going to let you down.
07:56Will you have another one, Bert?
07:58Oh, lovely.
07:59Thank you very much.
08:00Here you are.
08:01Here, I'll tell you what.
08:02What?
08:03I've got one for you, young Eli.
08:05Cheers.
08:06Cheers.
08:07Hey, hang on.
08:09Hey, finish that.
08:12I don't smoke cigars.
08:14You do now.
08:15Put this under here.
08:23Come in.
08:24How are you, love?
08:26I think the pain's easing a bit.
08:28Oh, that's good.
08:29I hope you'd like to get up for a bit this afternoon.
08:31Oh, I don't think it's eased as much as all that.
08:33No.
08:34Hey, you.
08:35Hiya, Waffer.
08:36What are you doing puffing at that?
08:38Sending smoke signals?
08:39Give it here.
08:40Put it out.
08:41You're no consideration.
08:43This is a sick man in the room.
08:45There'll be another one in a minute.
08:47Oh, that's all right.
08:48Oh, that's all right.
08:49Oh, that's all right.
08:50Oh, that's all right.
08:51Oh, that's all right.
08:52Oh, that's all right.
08:53Oh, that's all right.
08:54Oh, that's all right.
08:55Oh, that's all right.
08:56Oh, that's all right.
08:57Oh, that's all right.
08:58I'll see you in a minute.
08:59Come on, make yourself useful.
09:00Go and get that filled for him.
09:01All right.
09:02All right, miss.
09:03Oh, you dear me.
09:04What's that?
09:05Medicine.
09:06Medicine?
09:07Yes, our dad...
09:08One of our dad's cures, you know.
09:09It's Lemus's lightning lingtis.
09:10I've never heard of it.
09:11Well, it contains the exceptions of over 40 wild herbs.
09:15It cures colds, catarrh, asthma, bronchitis,
09:18rheumatoid tics and biliousness and fla...flagellants.
09:23Does it remove bloody stains as well?
09:26I'm glad, I'm glad that you've still got your sense of humour.
09:29Here, drink that.
09:30Oh, it looks horrible.
09:31Oh, it'll get you better.
09:33You won't get that on the National Health, you know.
09:35Where did you get it?
09:36Corn Market.
09:39Between the black puddings and the foot ointment.
09:42You expect me to drink that?
09:43Why not? I've drunk buckles of it.
09:45And look at me.
09:46Go on, look at that.
09:47It smells horrible.
09:48It's not for sniffing, it's for sopping.
09:50Now, go on, look what it says on the label.
09:52Now, look.
09:53It says,
09:54You can feel it doing you good.
09:57Oh, can you?
10:02Well?
10:03Yeah.
10:04Can you feel it doing you good?
10:05It's diabolical.
10:06Oh, well, I would dad swore by that.
10:08I'm not surprised he swore by it.
10:10Yeah, well, he wants to get you better.
10:12Well...
10:13Well, I can see...
10:14What's wrong with you in there?
10:15What are you doing now?
10:16I'm going to dog nose your case.
10:20What the hell do you know about diagnosing people?
10:24Three years at the Royal Infirmary, weren't I?
10:26I should know something in three years, shouldn't I?
10:29Not as a bloody ward cleaner.
10:33It's all in here.
10:34Arkwright's family doctor.
10:36Now, I just want to get to know your symptoms.
10:40And this duke will tell me what to do.
10:43It's not as easy as all that.
10:45Oh, yes, it is. Oh, yes, they all use this method.
10:48Now, it stands to sense.
10:50They can't walk about with all those diseases in their head, can they?
10:54Can't they?
10:55No.
10:56Why do you think these posh doctors call themselves consultants?
10:59Because they consult.
11:02And when they consult, what do they consult?
11:07They consult a book.
11:11I've heard everything now.
11:13Oh, I can just see the Royal Physician in the Royal Bedchamber.
11:17A slight cold, Your Majesty.
11:19Hang on.
11:20I'll just go and have a quick shuff to your Arkwright's household doctor.
11:24Very funny. Now, this is serious.
11:27Carry on, Matron.
11:28Well, now, then, where did you feel the pain?
11:30In me belly.
11:31You don't have a belly when you're ill.
11:33You have an abdomen.
11:35The pain's in the abdomen.
11:37And anything else?
11:39Yeah, I've got a very high temperature.
11:41High temperature. Feel sick?
11:43I did, now I've taken that bloody medicine.
11:46Nausea.
11:48Any dizziness?
11:50Oh, I'm definitely dizzy.
11:51Oh, yes, well, that's nausea, dizziness and sickness.
11:54That should be the place there.
11:56Oh, how are you, lad?
11:58What is it? Is it serious?
12:00Very. According to Dr Arkwright, you're pregnant.
12:04Hey, hey, hey, hey, do it to me, bring this up.
12:07Come on, it's burning me hands.
12:09It's on me belly button.
12:11Nellie.
12:12I'm coming.
12:13Take your hand off it.
12:21Everybody be quiet.
12:25OK, OK, settle down.
12:27Settle down now.
12:29I'll get you some food.
12:32I'll get you some food.
12:34Have a nice... Settle down and have a nice bit of chicken, eh?
12:37Oh, lovely, yes.
12:39Yes, I'll go and get you a milk stout.
12:41It'll build up your strength.
12:43Thank you very much, Anne, Nellie.
12:45Don't thank me, love, all I want to do is to see you get well.
12:48Thank you very much.
12:52I don't know how you do it, young Eli.
12:55You've cracked it!
12:58Hey, chicken, milk stout, can't be bad, can it?
13:02I bet if I play my cards right, I'll be in bed for a week.
13:06And there's nothing wrong with it.
13:11There's nothing wrong with you now, blue eyes,
13:14but there damn soon will be.
13:28Yeah, you got it then. That's right, Nellie, yeah.
13:31Now, you know what to do, don't you?
13:33Yes, now, don't make any mistakes, will you?
13:35Try and do your best.
13:37Oh, yes, yes, Nellie, you can get that hat for me,
13:39I shall be very pleased.
13:41Thank you. Ta-ra.
13:43I'm sorry, Miss Nellie, I thought you were up at the house.
13:46I brought a delivery note.
13:48Oh, I hope it wasn't too heavy for you to carry.
13:50No.
13:52How's poor Eli?
13:54As if you didn't know.
13:56And as if I didn't know.
13:58And as if nobody knows.
14:00But I know, you know.
14:02Oh, yes.
14:04But he doesn't know, you know,
14:06that his blanket, his electric blanket,
14:08is switched full on
14:10and there's three electric fires burning under his bed.
14:14What for?
14:16I know our Eli.
14:18He's been simmering up there now for a week.
14:21What for our Eli?
14:23He's been simmering up there now for two hours
14:25with only Arkwright's family doctor to read.
14:28By now he'll think he's got every disease under the sun.
14:32I wonder if it'll be under perspiration or sweating.
14:35Perspiration, I'll look up perspiration.
14:38Excessive perspiration is a fever.
14:41A fever, I've got a fever.
14:43Fevers, here we are.
14:45A fever is excessive perspiration.
14:47I know I bloody well got that.
14:49What's this? General laminase and achiness.
14:52I've got that.
14:54Dizziness, I've got that.
14:56Rigors, I don't know what the hell they are, but I've got them.
15:00The above symptoms are indicative of blackwater fever.
15:04I've got blackwater fever.
15:06Oh, dear. Blackwater, come in.
15:08Oh. Oh.
15:10How are you now? Terrible. I'm ill.
15:12Yes, I know you're ill.
15:14Yes, I brought you some medicine.
15:16All this? Yes, all of it.
15:18Oh, well. Oh, Nellie.
15:20Oh, I'm not well, Nellie. I know you're not well.
15:22That's why you're in bed. Oh, but I'm really ill.
15:25Yes, well, weren't you really ill before then?
15:27Oh, I was, yes, but I'm iller now.
15:29Yes, yes. I think I've got blackwater fever.
15:32Oh. Yeah.
15:33I don't fancy if that's a very bad complaint.
15:35I mean, there was a fella who came in the infirmary with that
15:38when I was there, you know.
15:40His face was all swollen up and bulbous like yours is now.
15:43All right. How long was he in for?
15:45Oh, not long. Only a couple of days.
15:47Oh, well, that's all right then, isn't it?
15:49Then he died.
15:52You're a bloody joke's comforter, you are.
15:54Get the doctor, get the doctor.
15:56Yeah, don't be so sudden. I've got the...
15:58Get the doctor, all right, for just a minute.
16:00That's it. It's downstairs now, as a matter of fact.
16:03Hey, I want... I want him to cure me, not smell me.
16:06He'll do both.
16:08Oh. Oh.
16:10Oh, dear. Can he come up, Doctor?
16:13Oh, there you are, Nigel. Have you got everything?
16:16Put your spethoscope on.
16:18That's right. How is he?
16:20Oh, he's, er, absolutely, er, brainwashed, you know.
16:24Well, I do hope I don't give the game away.
16:26Of course you won't. You look just like a real doctor.
16:29You look smashing. It's good of you to cooperate.
16:31Oh, not at all. As a matter of fact, I think I'm going to quite enjoy myself.
16:34Oh, well, he's psychologically, er, perforated.
16:38Oh, is he?
16:40Well, don't worry, Miss Blades, by the time I get through with him,
16:43he'll be positively petrified.
16:45Hey, it's moved.
16:48No, it hasn't. It's stopped.
16:50Oh, thank goodness, it's beaten up here.
16:53Oh, dear.
16:55Come in, Doctor. Come in.
16:57If you need me, I'll be outside.
16:59Don't leave me out, Nanny. Don't leave me.
17:01It's all right. It's all right. It's only the Doctor.
17:03Very well, Miss Blades.
17:05Now, Mr Pledge, what seems to be the trouble?
17:08I don't know. You're the Doctor.
17:10Don't worry, we'll soon find out what's wrong.
17:12If it's any help, I think I've got all the symptoms of blackwater fever.
17:15Really? Yeah.
17:17Are you sure it's not yellow-coated colic?
17:19I don't know. I didn't look that up.
17:23It's breaching your fear, Doctor.
17:25Please, Mr Pledge.
17:27Oh. What is it? What is it?
17:30What is it?
17:32Oh. What, what, what is it?
17:34Let me have a look. Let me have a look.
17:37Hey. Hmm?
17:39Oh.
17:43Oh.
17:45Oh, what is it? What have you found? What have you found?
17:48Open wide. Huh?
17:50Wider. Huh? Wider. Wider.
17:53Are you coming inside?
17:55Oh.
17:57Doctor, say something.
18:00Who's your next of kin?
18:03Doctor, tell me. I can take it. I can take it.
18:06I think I'll just have a little word with your sister in private.
18:09Goodbye, Mr Pledge.
18:14Steady on, Eli, now. Steady on. Steady on.
18:17Steady on. You're all right. You're going to be all right.
18:19You're going to get better. Doctors never tell you anything.
18:22The way you're carried on, you'd think you were going to peg out.
18:35What are you doing?
18:37What are you doing?
18:39Doctor thought it best.
18:41What did he say?
18:43He said you'd have anything you fancy.
18:46No, but, I mean, about me condition, I am going to get better, aren't I?
18:50Yes, of course, yeah.
18:52Well, what are you crying for?
18:54I'm not crying. I'm just got something in me eye, that's all.
18:57Come in.
19:03Oh, bloody old buccaneer.
19:07It's Lily and Walter come to see you.
19:09Won't you sit down?
19:13Now, Walter, don't dash. Take it steady.
19:18We've come to cheer you up. Have you?
19:20Oh, he does look bad, doesn't he? Yes.
19:23Well, we're all here together, all the family now.
19:26Just like when me dad...
19:28Hey, go on.
19:30When me dad what?
19:33We brought you some grapes.
19:35Black ones.
19:39Aren't you going to eat them?
19:41Not now. A bit later.
19:43Oh, suit yourself. Honey, don't leave it too late.
19:47I'm glad I didn't give that black coat away.
19:51Who does he remind you of?
19:53The lady lying there.
19:55Billy Myerscough.
19:57Billy Myerscough, to a T.
20:00God rest his soul.
20:02What the hell's going on?
20:04Nothing for you to worry about.
20:06What are you talking about? Billy Myerscough, black grapes,
20:09and the praying mantis here.
20:11He hasn't taken his eye off me cameleer coat since he came in.
20:15Now, come on. Don't you get excited.
20:17You'll be having a prolapse.
20:19There's nothing for you to worry about at all.
20:22Everything's absolutely normal.
20:24Yes, now, that's it.
20:26Oh, hello, Vicki.
20:28I came as soon as I could.
20:32The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want.
20:36He maketh me to lie in green pastures.
20:38Hey, hold on a minute.
20:40He leadeth me by the still waters.
20:42Hey.
20:44He restoreth my soul.
20:46He leadeth me in the path of righteousness, for his name's sake.
20:49I'm still warm.
20:52Yea, though I should walk in the valley,
20:55Yea, though I should walk in the valley of the shadow of death,
20:59I will fear no evil.
21:01Well, you put the bloody wind up me.
21:05Don't worry, my son.
21:07Always remember,
21:09compared to the fires of eternity,
21:11this life is but a flickering flame.
21:14Well, if you don't mind, I'd like to flicker a bit longer.
21:17Lovely voice.
21:19Now, look, Caroline,
21:21we've all got to go sometime.
21:23Right.
21:24And as me dad used to say,
21:26when the great reaper cometh with his scythe,
21:30it's no use ducking.
21:32Good afternoon, Mr. Pledge.
21:52Good afternoon, Mr. Pledge.
22:03Oh, that Cedric was very good.
22:05Yea, he always fancied himself as an undertaker.
22:08He looked like Dracula.
22:12Well, they were all very good.
22:14I reckon that must be the best performance
22:16the amateur dramatics have ever given.
22:19Well, we'll go and see how the condemned man is
22:21while we've been out here.
22:23He looked a bit peaky, didn't he, when we left,
22:25especially when Cedric got out his tape measure
22:27and started measuring him up.
22:29Peaky went green.
22:32Well, we'll go and put him out of his misery.
22:34I mean, this taught him a lesson it must have done.
22:37He'll not be swinging the lead so often again,
22:39I'll tell you.
22:40Hey, Eli!
22:42Eli, are you there? Can I come in?
22:45You don't think how it's happened to him, do you?
22:47I could not like it.
22:51He's gone.
22:52He must have nipped off while we were out.
22:54Where's he actually gone?
22:56Where's he actually gone?
23:01Hello.
23:02Hello, Nellie.
23:03Oh, it's you, Eli. Where are you?
23:05I'm at Manchester Airport.
23:06I'm booked on the next flight to the south of France.
23:08South of France?
23:09What do you want to go there for?
23:11Well, I thought as long as I only got a few weeks to live,
23:13you know, I'd pop off abroad.
23:15I know you wouldn't begrudge me my last fling.
23:17Your last fling?
23:18Give it here.
23:20Well, you know, I thought I'd look at the beauties of the world
23:23before I stepped out into the unknown.
23:26Oh, Eli, come back.
23:28There's no wrong with you.
23:29I can't hear you with these planes taking off.
23:31And don't worry about money.
23:32I've drawn it out of our joint account.
23:34Joint account?
23:35Only money?
23:36Hey, where were Eli?
23:38Oh, come on, I was only pulling your leg.
23:40Hey, what did she say?
23:42She's going bloody mad.
23:43Hey, there you are.
23:45That's for information received.
23:47Thanks, Philby.
23:49Well, ta-ra, Nellie.
23:51I'll drop you a line from south of France on a postcard.
23:54So long, love.
23:55Oh, is that the aeroplane?
24:29APPLAUSE
24:50P584, stroke 5, nearest and dearest, take 1.
25:00P584, stroke 5, nearest and dearest, take 1.
25:07P584, stroke 5, nearest and dearest, take 1.
25:19MUSIC
25:29INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC
25:47Is it all right? Eh, what's all right?
25:49Well, the starting, I mean. This meeting.
25:52What about Miss Nelly? You leave our Nelly to me.
25:55She won't like it. She'll know no doubt about it, will she?
25:58What the eye never hears...
26:00No, wait a minute, wait a minute.
26:02What the heart never sees and the ear never...
26:06No, no, no, no. Hang on, hang on.
26:08What the ear never sees and the eyes never grieves,
26:13the heart never hears.
26:16Thank you, Bertha and Russell. Now, can we make a start?
26:19Yeah, the floor's yours.
26:20Now, I've called this extraordinary meeting
26:22to discuss our great financial position.
26:24I, as the managing director, represent the management,
26:27and you two represent Labour.
26:29I bloody don't. I'm a Tory.
26:32Not Harold Wilson's Labour. Labour, Labour.
26:35As opposed to management, do you understand?
26:37No. Oh.
26:39I'll have to have him put down.
26:41We represent the lads.
26:43Oh, well, I don't mind doing that.
26:45Right, now, I've been going through the figures,
26:48and for the past 12 weeks, we've been losing money steadily.
26:51We've got to have a complete change of policy.
26:53Now, I suggest we scrub the 12 results
26:55and put all the money on the treble chance.
26:57That's a very good idea, young Eli, and I'm in favour.
27:01How about you?
27:03Oi, Cheyenne. What?
27:05Are you in favour of it?
27:07Oh, yes, I'm in favour of it.
27:08Right, that's carried unanimously.
27:10Now, the next item on the agenda are the bankers.
27:12I suggest Liverpool and Chelsea in the First Division,
27:15and Pompey...