Comedian’s Comedian Podcast host and ‘expert stand-up’ (Times) Goldsmith now commits to the bit. This year: second | dG1fdGJmVFNBV3ZsM3M
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00 It's always nice to perform in a venue that looks and feels like a really oversubscribed one of those puzzle room escape games.
00:07 Have you done those? There's a couple here I know. They're so much fun.
00:12 If you've never done one, what happens is you and five friends get locked in a room by a stranger, stay with me,
00:18 and you have to solve a bunch of puzzles and if you solve them all within the hour, they let you out.
00:23 Spoiler alert, they let you out anyway.
00:25 They're great fun. It's somewhere on an entertainment scale between the crystal maze and burgling a grandparent.
00:32 They're great fun. They're a really good way to find out under pressure which of your friends knows the meaning of the word clockwise.
00:38 Don't do one with a child is my advice. I did one at the Edinburgh Festival last year.
00:46 There were six of us there, one person dropped out, one of our team brought their 12 year old son along last minute.
00:51 Someone just drew breath. There is nothing more disappointing in the world than seeing an adult push a child out of the way of a filing cabinet by its face.
01:01 Like its whole face. Like, "I've got this!"
01:03 Me and my brother did one a little while ago. He came down on a Tuesday afternoon. We did one here in Bristol.
01:10 He came down and we went along for his birthday. We hadn't booked online. Normally you have to book online, but we just turned up on spec.
01:19 We found, you know when you see a two-storey building, just like a little house on its own, surrounded by rubble on an industrial estate.
01:27 There were these big imposing stone steps, a great big black door with a nameplate, but the nameplate was blank.
01:34 We thought, "Ah, the game's afoot."
01:36 Wrong building.
01:39 So we tracked down the actual one, it was around the corner.
01:43 We went in and the first thing that happens is you have to, you've really got to throw yourself in, right?
01:47 If you hold back, you don't get the most out of it.
01:50 So the first thing that happens is you have to undergo a slightly eggy mission briefing from a drama graduate in a lab coat.
01:56 And part of you, to be honest, is biting your tongue because you're thinking, "Come on, mate, if you knew anything about strategy, you'd be in a soap opera."
02:03 But you don't, it just sounds mean. I think you're going to have to accept that that bit just sounds mean.
02:09 Sorry, I record all of my shows, even this one, for quality and training purposes.
02:14 And what I do is I'll listen back to this in a cafe about 9 o'clock tomorrow morning.
02:19 It's going quite well.
02:22 Believe in yourself.
02:26 So we went in, we did the briefing, and we had a good time. It was alright, it wasn't my favourite one.
02:33 It was kind of spy-themed, a bit of an over-reliance on number puzzles.
02:37 They say mankind is only three meals away from barbarism.
02:40 But we're apparently only one padlock combination from punching a brother in the neck.
02:44 Who knew?
02:45 We finished up, it was great fun, we finished up, and then we thanked the guy, took a picture with him, it was fantastic.
02:51 And then we left, and we got a couple of blocks away before I suddenly realised I hadn't paid.
02:55 And it was 50 quid, which normally you'd share between six people, but it was just the two of us, and it was his birthday, so I was going to pay all of it.
03:03 And it hadn't been brilliant.
03:06 And we had escaped.
03:08 But we did the right thing, of course we did. We went back, well, we put the money in a safe and then tipped it in the canal.
03:14 See how they like it.
03:15 So that's my way of a little introductory anecdote about how sometimes it can be quite fun to deliberately trap yourself in a particular situation.
03:25 The rest of the show is about my excellent new wife and baby.
03:32 It's always nice to perform in a venue that looks and feels like a really over-subscribed one of those puzzle room escape games.
03:39 It's always nice to perform in a venue that looks and feels like a really over-subscribed one of those puzzle room escape games.
03:45 [LAUGHTER]
03:47 [LAUGHTER]
03:49 [LAUGHTER]
03:51 [LAUGHTER]
03:53 [BLANK_AUDIO]