Private Video - Dailymotion

4/29/2024

Chapters
0:00 Childhood Trauma's Impact on Physical Health
3:15 Sleep Disruptions – Ramifications of Child Abuse
10:02 Maternal Weight and Gestational Diabetes
11:47 Adverse Childhood Experiences and Lifespan Reduction
13:25 The Physiological and Behavioral Effects of ACEs
16:43 The Ongoing Battle Against Child Abuse
18:07 The Resilience of the Human Brain
33:23 Protective Role of Peaceful Parenting
46:19 Unveiling the Tactics of Child Predators
53:16 The Five-Step Grooming Process
57:00 Alarming Risks for Children of Single Mothers

Long Summary
Stefan Molyneux discusses the profound impact of Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs) on health outcomes such as cancer, heart disease, and mental disorders, citing various studies and meta-analyses. The relationship between ACEs and cardiovascular disease, metabolic dysfunction, inflammation, and sleep disturbances is explored. The lasting effects of childhood abuse on sleep quality and the connection with post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) and nightmares are discussed, shedding light on the neurobiological and psychological basis for these disturbances.

Different forms of childhood abuse, such as physical, sexual, emotional abuse, and neglect, are linked to an increased risk of developing mental disorders later in life. The root causes of adult dysfunction, including addiction, heart disease, obesity, and depression, are traced back to childhood traumas. The impact of maternal obesity on maternal and fetal health is examined, showing the heightened risks and complications associated with gestational diabetes.

The discussion delves into the association between ACEs and various sleep disorders in adulthood, emphasizing the need for trauma-informed care and early interventions. The efficacy of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) in addressing trauma, sleep disorders, and mental health outcomes is highlighted through various studies and systematic reviews. The cost-effectiveness of therapy versus financial compensation in treating mental health disorders is explored, showing the significant benefits of psychological therapy.

The episode also delves into the strategies used by sexual predators to groom and abuse children, highlighting the various tactics to gain access, trust, and silence from victims. The stark statistics on offenders, victim vulnerability, and grooming techniques shed light on the importance of understanding and preventing child sexual abuse. The critical role of peaceful parenting in protecting children from abuse is emphasized, focusing on communication, trust, and emotional connection within families.

The episode concludes with a call to action to raise awareness about the prevalence and impact of childhood abuse, support survivors, and advocate for peaceful parenting practices to safeguard children from the lasting effects of trauma. By acknowledging the profound consequences of ACEs, promoting early interventions, and advocating for trauma-informed care, society can work toward

Transcript

00:00 Peaceful Parenting by Stefan Molyneux, Part 25.

00:05 Childhood Abuse, Heart Disease, and Cancer

00:08 A 2021 meta-analysis of 18 studies which had data from 406,210 people found

00:17 people with two or three types of ACEs are 1.35 times more likely to get cancer

00:25 compared to those with no ACEs.

00:28 If a person has four or more ACEs, they are 2.17 times more likely to get cancer than

00:34 someone with no ACEs.

00:37 Now when looking at specific ACEs, physical abuse, those who experience this are 1.23

00:45 times more likely to get cancer.

00:49 Sexual abuse, people with this experience have a 1.26 times higher chance of getting

00:54 cancer.

00:57 Temperature to intimate partner violence, those exposed to this are 1.26 times more

01:03 at risk for cancer.

01:07 Financial difficulties in the family, people from families with financial struggles are

01:12 1.16 times more likely to get cancer.

01:18 The Journal of the American Medical Association's 2020 review on the association between ACEs

01:24 and cardiovascular disease later in life gathered the findings of over a decade of research.

01:30 From the review, individuals with four or more ACEs faced 2.2 times the risk of ischemic

01:38 heart disease, 2.4 times the risk of stroke.

01:45 A study with 18,303 adults across 10 countries linked parental mental disorders, substance

01:51 abuse, physical or sexual abuse, and parental loss to cardiovascular disease.

02:00 The Nurses' Health Study 2 showed that women with severe physical and sexual abuse had

02:04 higher chances of cardiovascular disease events.

02:08 However, after adjusting for factors like obesity, smoking, and depression, the significance

02:13 disappeared.

02:16 The Dunedin Multidisciplinary Health and Development Study found maltreated or socially

02:21 isolated individuals had a 60% higher risk of inflammation at age 32.

02:28 Those from low socioeconomic backgrounds or who were socially isolated had double the

02:32 risk of metabolic dysfunction.

02:36 The CARDIA Study observed a trend between higher ACEs and cardiovascular disease events

02:41 in 3,646 young adults from 1985 to 2018.

02:49 A meta-analysis found that individuals with four or more ACEs had higher odds of sedentarism

02:56 (25%), being overweight/obese (39%), diabetes (52%), smoking (182%), cardiovascular disease

03:09 (107%).

03:16 Sleep Disruptions - The Overlooked Consequence of Child Abuse

03:22 One of the less frequently discussed ramifications of adverse childhood experiences is the profound

03:27 effect on sleep quality in later life.

03:31 Sleep isn't just a rest phase, it's a fundamental aspect of our daily lives, pivotal for mental

03:36 rejuvenation, cognitive function, and emotional balance.

03:41 Regrettably, the ghosts of childhood traumas often don't rest, even when their victims

03:46 desperately seek respite in the arms of sleep.

03:52 For those subjected to abuse in their formative years, the sanctuary of slumber can become

03:56 an arena of distress.

03:59 Many report consistent disturbances in their sleep patterns.

04:04 Psychology Today reports that individuals who have faced adverse childhood experiences

04:09 (ACEs) often undergo frequent occurrences of nightmares, sometimes on a weekly basis

04:15 or even more frequently.

04:18 Federal research studies suggest that a substantial proportion (potentially as high as 80%) of

04:23 individuals dealing with post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) describe enduring nightmares

04:28 that persist over several months or even years subsequent to a traumatic event.

04:36 The question then arises, why does childhood abuse have such lasting and significant impacts

04:41 on sleep?

04:43 The answer lies in the realm of neurobiology.

04:47 Traumatic events in childhood can result in persistent alterations in the body's stress

04:52 response systems.

04:54 Moreover, psychological distress further compounds the issue.

04:59 Anxiety, post-traumatic stress disorder, and depression, all common in those who have experienced

05:04 childhood abuse, are known perpetrators of sleep disturbances.

05:10 Nightmares or flashbacks stemming from these conditions can jolt individuals awake, infusing

05:14 their nights with dread.

05:19 A 2015 systemic review on ACEs and adult sleep disorders found key findings.

05:28 The majority of retrospective studies (25 out of 28) showed significant association

05:33 between ACEs and sleep disorders like sleep apnea, narcolepsy, nightmare distress, sleep

05:41 paralysis, and psychiatric sleep disorders.

05:46 Strength of associations often increased with the number and severity of ACEs.

05:52 Two prospective studies corroborated these findings.

05:57 Significant relationship found between family conflict at age 7-15 and insomnia at age 18

06:03 (40% higher chance).

06:07 Childhood sexual abuse linked with sleep disturbances in adult women 10 years later.

06:14 Conclusions and recommendations.

06:17 Growing evidence suggests an association between ACEs and various sleep disorders in adulthood.

06:23 Need for trauma-informed care for abuse survivors with sleep disturbances.

06:30 More longitudinal studies are required to understand this association better, particularly

06:34 regarding potential gender and racial/ethnic disparities.

06:40 It is essential to underscore the vast implications of poor sleep.

06:46 Chronic sleep deprivation or disturbed sleep can pave the way for a plethora of health

06:50 issues including cardiovascular diseases, weakened immune function, and cognitive impairments.

06:56 Additionally, the philosophical and psychological toll is equally significant.

07:01 The fog of fatigue can cloud judgment, hinder introspection, and obstruct one's quest for

07:06 truth and self-understanding.

07:07 In essence, the tendrils of child abuse extend far and wide, reaching into the very tranquility

07:18 of one's nights.

07:20 Addressing sleep disturbances isn't merely about ensuring physical well-being, but about

07:25 restoring a sense of peace, of granting solace to souls that have known too much pain.

07:33 To genuinely heal, it's crucial that we recognize the vast scope of childhood trauma's consequences.

07:39 In doing so, we not only extend compassion, but also arm ourselves with the knowledge

07:44 to forge paths of true recovery.

07:49 General Mental Disorders

07:52 The data regarding childhood abuse and mental illness is stark and dark.

08:01 Results revealed a significant association between the following childhood exposure and

08:06 adult mental disorder—bullying (victimhood, perpetration, and frequency), emotional abuse,

08:14 physical neglect, parental loss, and general maltreatment (unspecified end or multiple

08:20 trauma exposure).

08:22 There was some evidence of a dose-response relationship with those exposed to multiple

08:26 forms of maltreatment having more than three times the odds of developing a mental disorder.

08:34 There is strong evidence of an association between childhood trauma and later mental

08:39 illness.

08:40 This association is particularly evident for exposure to bullying, emotional abuse, maltreatment,

08:46 and parental loss.

08:48 The evidence suggests that childhood and adolescence are an important time for risk for later mental

08:54 illness and an important period in which to focus intervention strategies.

09:00 From Childhood Trauma and Adult Mental Disorder, a systematic review and meta-analysis of longitudinal

09:05 cohort studies.

09:07 2021

09:09 Root Causes of Adult Dysfunction

09:14 While the world focuses on treating symptoms, whether they be drug addiction, alcohol abuse,

09:22 or depression, the root cause remains neglected.

09:28 From the propensity for drug abuse to the risk of heart disease and mental illness,

09:32 from the struggle with obesity to the battles with depression, the dark shadows of childhood

09:38 traumas loom large.

09:44 In the subsequent sections, we'll continue to unmask the various forms of child abuse

09:48 one by one, holding them up to the harsh light of reason and evidence, in a bid to underscore

09:53 just how vital it is for us as a society to address them head on.

10:03 Mother's Weight and its Link to Diabetes

10:05 A mother's obesity can amplify her risk of having both existing and gestational diabetes

10:12 (GDM).

10:14 GDM Risk Based on Weight

10:20 Slightly Overweight OR 2.14

10:24 Obese OR 3.56

10:27 Extremely Obese OR 8.56

10:33 Gaining weight in the years leading up to pregnancy escalates the threat of GDM, particularly

10:36 in women who were previously of average weight.

10:41 Effects influencing GDM rates include being older than 35, belonging to Hispanic or Asian

10:46 groups, having an education of 12 years or fewer, and having given birth two or more

10:52 times previously.

10:55 Obese pregnant women commonly exhibit elevated insulin resistance, leading to increased fat

11:00 accessibility for the fetus.

11:04 Studies on obese mothers with GDM have found heightened activity of genes tied to fat processing

11:10 in their placentae.

11:13 Mothers with GDM can expect complications such as raised blood sugar, higher chances

11:18 of cesarean sections, and a likelihood of developing diabetes in the future.

11:25 For babies born to mothers with GDM, there's an elevated risk of mortality around birth,

11:30 higher weight at birth, a predisposition to obesity during their younger and older years,

11:35 and potential type 2 diabetes.

11:39 From The Impact of Maternal Obesity on Maternal and Fetal Health, 2008.

11:48 The Life Cut Short

11:52 The aftershocks of adverse childhood experiences are both wide-ranging and long-lasting.

11:58 Perhaps one of the most startling revelations from decades of research is the undeniable

12:03 link between high ACE scores and a significantly reduced lifespan.

12:10 The trauma experienced during formative years not only haunts individuals psychologically,

12:15 but also manifests in physical deterioration over time, shortening the length and quality

12:22 of life.

12:26 Individuals who have experienced significant childhood trauma face a reduction of 20 years

12:32 in their life expectancy and are at a threefold increased risk of developing heart disease

12:39 and lung cancer.

12:43 An analysis of various studies reveals a grim correlation between ACEs and life expectancy.

12:51 Children subjected to consistent traumatic experiences have, on average, a life expectancy

12:56 that is significantly shorter than those with little to no ACEs.

13:04 Individuals with 6+ ACEs had an average lifespan reduced by nearly 20 years (60.6 vs. 79.1

13:15 years).

13:16 In the UK, individuals with 4+ ACEs had nearly double the risk of premature death.

13:26 Why does this happen?

13:28 The body's response to prolonged stress, such as that experienced through consistent

13:33 trauma, involves the continuous release of stress hormones like cortisol.

13:38 Over time, this chronic state of stress begins to wear on the body's vital systems.

13:44 The immune system becomes compromised, making individuals more susceptible to illness.

13:49 Additionally, a higher likelihood of adopting unhealthy coping mechanisms such as smoking,

13:55 excessive alcohol consumption and drug abuse further exacerbates the health risks.

14:03 As we covered earlier, individuals with high ACE scores tend to have a higher risk of developing

14:08 chronic diseases like heart disease, diabetes and respiratory problems.

14:15 Exposure to adverse childhood experiences (ACEs) has been linked to several negative

14:20 health habits.

14:23 Victims of child abuse also tend to consume fewer healthy foods, favoring comfort foods

14:27 instead, and are more prone to leading an inactive lifestyle.

14:32 The mind-body connection is evident here, as the emotional scars of abuse and neglect

14:37 translate into tangible physical risks.

14:41 In conclusion, the shadow of abuse looms large over an individual's entire lifespan.

14:48 From the mental struggles they grapple with to the physical ailments they are predisposed

14:52 to, the effects of childhood trauma are profound and far-reaching.

14:59 As society gains a deeper understanding of these consequences, it becomes paramount to

15:03 invest in early interventions, trauma-informed care and, most crucially, efforts to prevent

15:09 ACEs in the first place.

15:15 Yet the world often remains willfully oblivious, choosing to treat the symptoms rather than

15:20 addressing the cause.

15:23 We attempt to fix broken adults without recognizing that these fractures started as weeping wounds

15:29 in childhood, growing and expanding with every episode of abuse or neglect.

15:38 If there's one message to take away, it's this.

15:42 To heal the world, we must first heal the child.

15:47 Through introspection and self-awareness, by becoming better parents and caregivers,

15:51 by educating ourselves and others on the impacts of child abuse, we can hope to see a world

15:57 where children grow up in nurturing environments, free from trauma and full of potential.

16:07 For further exploration on this critical topic, consider delving into my Balm in the Brain

16:11 series.

16:14 By spreading awareness and knowledge, we take a collective step towards a brighter, safer

16:19 future for our children.

16:21 Remember, every child deserves love, understanding and protection.

16:27 Together we can make a difference.

16:32 In the heart of every abused child lies a ticking bomb, but the hands of loving caregivers

16:38 have the power to defuse it.

16:45 Peaceful Parenting vs. the Balm in the Brain

16:48 ACEs and child abuse in general is the actual pandemic overshadowing anything else.

16:58 While other crises make headlines and command our attention, this insidious plague, rooted

17:04 in the darkest recesses of our homes and societies, marches on, its devastation echoing in silent

17:11 screams and haunting the hallways of countless lives.

17:15 The enduring ramifications of such experiences aren't mere ripples; they're tsunamis that

17:20 capsize the vessel of potential in our youth, leaving us stranded in the tumultuous seas

17:27 of trauma.

17:29 If we're to speak of monstrous evils in our world, then child abuse and the scars left

17:36 by ACEs must top that list.

17:40 This isn't just a domestic issue or a concern relegated to specific socioeconomic tiers;

17:46 it's a universal atrocity that every society which truly rejects evil must confront with

17:52 unwavering resolve.

17:56 The future of humanity rests on how we treat, protect, and nurture our most vulnerable.

18:06 However, it's not all bleak.

18:11 The brain, while susceptible to damage, is also incredibly resilient.

18:17 Through awareness, therapy, and introspection, the damage can be mitigated.

18:23 Healing begins with understanding, acknowledging the trauma, and seeking help.

18:31 Peaceful parenting is the antithesis of child abuse.

18:37 It's about understanding that children are not our property, but individuals with their

18:41 own emotions, thoughts, and needs.

18:45 By being present, emotionally available, and empathetic, parents can nurture their children

18:49 and create strong, positive neural pathways.

18:55 From Shadows to Sunlight

18:57 Dialogues that Mend the Soul

19:00 It's pivotal that we comprehend this—that our childhood experiences, be they vibrant

19:08 sunrises of joy or tempestuous storms of distress, etch profound marks upon the canvas of our

19:16 psyche.

19:17 These experiences, especially ACEs, can often become spectral chains that bind, influencing

19:23 our thoughts, feelings, behaviors, and interpersonal dynamics.

19:31 It's both fascinating and terrifying how events from years past, perhaps even decades, can

19:37 still exert such commanding forces in our present.

19:42 The child within us, hurt and silenced, still yearns for validation, understanding, and

19:48 healing.

19:49 But here's the marvel of human resilience—we possess an inherent capacity for recovery,

19:57 for rediscovery, for reconnection.

20:04 Talk Therapy

20:05 A Beacon in the Dark

20:09 Enter Talk Therapy, specifically Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, an intimate dialogue,

20:16 a soulful conversation where the wounded self is laid bare, acknowledged, and rejuvenated.

20:23 It's not about rehashing or dwelling in the past, but rather about understanding and transforming

20:28 it.

20:31 Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, CBT, is a form of psychotherapy that combines cognitive therapy

20:37 with behavior therapy by identifying faulty or maladaptive patterns of thinking, emotional

20:43 responses or behaviors, and substituting them with desirable patterns of thinking, emotional

20:50 responses or behaviors.

20:54 The 2021 study, Interventions to Support People Exposed to Adverse Childhood Experiences,

21:00 systematic review of systematic reviews, reports.

21:05 Twenty-five reviews were included.

21:08 Most reviews focus on psychological interventions and mental health outcomes.

21:13 The strongest evidence is for cognitive behavioral therapy for people exposed to abuse.

21:20 Some findings on the efficacy of CBT.

21:24 One randomized controlled trial, RCT, assigned sexually abused children to either child-alone

21:29 CBTs, family CBTs, or waitlist control.

21:35 Children allocated to treatment groups showed decreased self-reported levels of PTSD symptoms,

21:39 fear, and anxiety, along with improved overall functioning as reported by parents.

21:44 Importantly, the presence of caregivers did not influence this outcome.

21:50 TF-CBT, Trauma-Focused Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, has demonstrated that this approach

21:56 is effective in addressing individual traumatic incidents in young individuals, including

22:01 occurrences like natural disasters and car accidents.

22:06 In fact, as many as 92% of participants no longer met the criteria for PTSD after completing

22:12 ten sessions, and this positive outcome was maintained even at a six-month follow-up.

22:19 The psychoeducational aspect of TF-CBT has shown effectiveness in enhancing understanding

22:25 of healthy sexuality and body safety among children aged 2 to 8 who have experienced

22:30 sexual abuse.

22:33 TF-CBT is also applicable in group settings, with shorter duration, cross-culturally, and

22:39 across wide arrays of trauma.

22:42 TF-CBT effectively reduced PTSD symptoms and increased psychosocial functioning in

22:48 Children in protection agencies in Jordan.

22:52 Child soldiers and other war-affected youth in the Democratic Republic of Congo, and sexually

22:57 exploited girls in the Democratic Republic of Congo.

23:01 In Zambia, orphans and vulnerable children randomized to TF-CBT saw significantly reduced

23:06 trauma and stress-related symptoms.

23:09 PTSD-diagnosed adolescents four years post-2004 Thai tsunami received a brief six-hour CBT

23:17 treatment across three days, leading to an immediate reduction in symptoms.

23:22 Furthermore, street children in Mexico randomized to receive 12 sessions of individual CBTs

23:29 reported lower levels of depression, anxiety, and anger when compared with the waitlist

23:34 condition, with results maintained three months post-treatment.

23:38 Let's break this down.

23:44 The Power of Validation One of the most profound impacts of ACEs is

23:49 the feeling of isolation, a notion that one's suffering is singular, invalid, or inconsequential.

23:58 Through talk therapy, individuals can find validation.

24:02 To be told "I believe you" or "It wasn't your fault" can be incredibly liberating.

24:11 Re-framing Core Beliefs Childhood trauma often imprints negative core

24:16 beliefs.

24:17 "I'm not worthy," "I'm unlovable," "The world is a dangerous place," or "I'm not resourceful

24:22 enough to navigate the challenges of life."

24:25 Talk therapy helps dissect these fallacies, replacing them with healthier, constructive

24:30 beliefs.

24:33 Emotional Processing Many survivors of trauma have suppressed or

24:37 disconnected from their emotions as a defense mechanism.

24:40 With a safe harbor of therapy, these emotions can be identified, understood, and expressed.

24:47 This process can be challenging undoubtedly, but immediately cathartic.

24:54 Mastery Over Memories Rather than being trapped in the loop of

24:57 traumatic memories, talk therapy allows individuals to revisit those memories in a controlled

25:03 environment, slowly desensitizing and gaining mastery over them.

25:09 Methods and Strategies Apart from emotional processing, talk therapy

25:14 provides practical tools and strategies to manage anxiety, depression, and other associated

25:19 symptoms.

25:20 It's not merely about delving into the past, but equipping for the present and future.

25:25 A 2004 Australian study explored the cost-effectiveness of CBT and SSRIs on treating major depressive

25:34 disorder in children.

25:37 Benefit Health benefits measured as

25:40 a reduction in DALYs (this stands for Disability Adjusted Life Years; it's a measure used in

25:47 public health to quantify the overall burden of disease)

25:51 effect size sourced from meta-analysis of randomized controlled trials (financial figures

25:56 are in Australian dollars)

25:59 Analysis focused on new major depressive disorder (MDD) episodes in Australian children aged

26:05 6-17 from the year 2000.

26:08 Results CBT by public psychologists is most cost-effective

26:13 at $9,000 per DALY saved.

26:17 SSRIs and CBT by other providers likely under $50,000 per DALY saved.

26:26 CBT is more effective than SSRIs in this age group.

26:31 CBT leads to a higher total health benefit (DALYs saved) than SSRIs.

26:39 Conclusions CBT by public psychologists is the top cost-effective

26:43 first-line treatment for MDD in this age group.

26:49 In another study, research showed that CBT therapy offers a cost-effectiveness that is

26:53 approximately 32 times greater than that of financial compensation.

27:00 The findings of the study.

27:03 Money and life events valuation Money is frequently used to value life events.

27:10 Several areas of life have been monetarily valued (marriage, social relationships, fear

27:15 of crime, noise, health, disabilities).

27:19 Marriage value, as an example, is equivalent to an extra $100,000 (£70,000) annually.

27:26 These values derive from subjective well-being data.

27:30 Typically a one standard deviation increase in income boosts well-being by 0.17 to 0.21

27:37 standard deviations.

27:41 Compensation for injustices Judges often award monetary compensation

27:46 for psychological distress.

27:49 Some suggest that traumatic events can be monetarily evaluated.

27:54 Research suggests using monetary figures for compensation in court cases (e.g. losing family

27:59 members or disabilities).

28:02 Recommended compensation figures Losing a partner (£114,000 to £206,000 annually)

28:12 Losing a child (£89,000 to £140,000) In contrast, the UK's Fatal Accidents Act

28:20 1976 recommends £10,000 Unemployment/psychological distress (£34,000

28:29 to £59,000 annually)

28:34 Effectiveness of psychological therapy Studies have examined the clinical and cost-effectiveness

28:39 of treatments for depression.

28:42 Treatments compared include general practitioner care, cognitive behaviour therapy (CBT) and

28:49 non-directive counselling.

28:51 All treatments reduced depression by at least 1.5 standard deviations in 12 months.

28:57 Average treatment cost, inclusive of indirect costs, was less than £1,500.

29:02 Notably, CBT and counselling showed results within 4 months, at less than £800.

29:11 Comparison Therapy vs. Financial Compensation

29:16 The cost-effectiveness of psychotherapy vs. financial compensation hasn't been extensively

29:21 studied.

29:24 Monetary compensation for the loss of a partner is about £114,000, but therapy might cost

29:29 under £600 for equivalent relief.

29:34 For unemployment-related psychological distress, therapy costs between £100 to £200, contrasting

29:40 starkly with monetary compensation.

29:45 These effects can be valued between £179,000 and £292,000 of extra annual income, making

29:53 it much more cost-effective than monetary compensation.

29:59 Incomes Limited Effectiveness

30:02 Incomes capacity to boost mental health appears limited.

30:06 Research on lottery wins revealed a £4,300 win improves mental health by about a quarter

30:12 of a standard deviation two years post-win.

30:16 Psychological therapy is around 32 times more cost-effective than financial compensation.

30:24 Discussion and Limitations

30:27 It's challenging to draw direct inferences across studies.

30:30 The efficacy of psychological therapy isn't solely based on people experiencing significant

30:34 life losses.

30:36 People adapt over time to life events, but this doesn't negate the benefits of therapy

30:40 or compensation.

30:43 It's hypothesised that therapy might speed up adaptation.

30:49 Implications for Judges

30:50 Tort law seeks to restore victims to their pre-wronged position.

30:57 Current compensation values in courts are arbitrary.

31:00 Monetary compensation might not effectively alleviate psychological distress post-trauma.

31:06 Therapy offers a more direct, personalised and cost-effective solution.

31:11 Implications for Policymakers and Society

31:14 High suggested compensation values highlight money's inefficiency in improving wellbeing.

31:21 Despite increased income in developed societies, happiness hasn't grown proportionally.

31:27 Depression's prevalence is expected to rise, indicating a need for improved mental health

31:30 care access.

31:32 The value of mental health should be prioritised alongside economic progress.

31:38 Improved mental health care access is essential for national wellbeing.

31:43 It's important to remember that talk therapy, though potent, is not a magic bullet.

31:48 Recovery is a journey, often non-linear, filled with peaks of insight and valleys of challenge.

31:54 Yet it is a journey worth undertaking.

31:58 To those bearing the burdens of ACEs, I implore, consider the power of talk.

32:04 Reach out, seek therapy, engage in this soulful conversation.

32:10 Your past might be written, but the future?

32:13 The future is yet a blank page, and you hold the pen.

32:20 To close, it's worth reflecting on a thought.

32:24 Our childhood may shape us, but it doesn't define us.

32:29 Through endeavours like talk therapy and the acquisition of self-knowledge, we can reclaim

32:34 our lives and stand strong against the momentum of history.

32:42 Therapy 32 times better than more money!

32:46 To summarise, research from the University of Warwick has shown that talk therapy can

32:50 be as much as 32 times more cost-effective at improving wellbeing than getting more money.

32:56 After researching data on thousands of people who provided information about their mental

33:00 wellbeing, the study authors found that the increase in happiness from a course of therapy

33:05 that cost only $1,329 was so significant that it would take a pay increase of more than

33:13 $41,542 to achieve a similar boost in wellbeing.

33:24 How Peaceful Parenting Protects Children You might wonder, how does peaceful parenting

33:32 protect children from abuse even outside the home?

33:36 The philosophy of peaceful parenting at its core emphasises the creation of a safe, nurturing

33:42 and open environment for a child.

33:44 In such an environment, open communication is encouraged.

33:50 Children are more likely to disclose any inappropriate behaviour or actions they may have encountered.

33:57 Awareness is heightened.

33:59 Parents are more in tune with any changes in their child's behaviour or demeanour, enabling

34:02 early intervention.

34:05 Protection is prioritised.

34:07 A peaceful parent is vigilant, ensuring their child's safety not just within the home, but

34:12 even when interacting with the world at large.

34:18 Predators - How They Operate It is essential to understand the risk that

34:26 a pedophile is taking when selecting his or her victim.

34:30 If the predator chooses wrong and the child reports him to the parents, legal proceedings

34:34 might ensue that could very well end up putting the pedophile in prison.

34:39 Child molesterers are often assaulted and murdered in prisons, largely because so many

34:43 convicted criminals were sexually abused as children, and so every time a predator targets

34:48 a child, he is literally taking his life into his hands.

34:55 Pedophiles who prey on dozens or hundreds of children, as so many of them do, have to

34:59 be right every single time.

35:03 And so often, they are.

35:07 So what are they looking for?

35:11 Let's analyse.

35:14 Basic Information on Offenders Age range - 19 to 74 with an average age

35:22 of 41.

35:24 Predominantly between ages 30 to 42.

35:29 Victims - 35% professional, 31% skilled/semi-skilled, 44% unskilled/soldiers.

35:40 Marital status - 48% had been/are married, 52% were single.

35:48 Victim preferences - 58% targeted girls, 14% boys, and 28% targeted both.

35:58 Age range of victims - 1 to 18.

36:03 Most offenders had multiple victims, with a concerning number having victimised a large

36:07 number of children.

36:10 70% of offending sexual predators have between 1 and 9 victims, while 20% have 10 to 40 victims.

36:21 66% of the offenders knew their victims.

36:25 32% were parents or step-parents who abused their own children.

36:31 When females offend, they are much more likely to go for much younger children.

36:39 Age 0 to 6 years, younger offenders (age less than 12 years) had 57.1% of their victims

36:46 in this age group, while older offenders (age greater than or equal to 12 years) had only

36:53 21%.

36:54 Age 7 to 10 years, for younger offenders, 31.2% of victims were in this age group, compared

37:02 to 15.5% for older offenders.

37:07 Female sexual offenders offend against both males and females.

37:11 They are more likely than male offenders to offend against same-gender victims.

37:18 Yet female sex offenders are more likely than men to have victims of both genders.

37:25 Male and female sex offenders have commonalities.

37:27 They are demographically similar, although women are more likely to offend at a school,

37:33 hospital, or jail.

37:38 Men were more likely to report having been raped during their lifetime, however.

37:43 Although only 1.7% of men report being raped in their lifetime (the CDC's limited definition

37:48 of rape requires the penetration of the victim), but 6.7% of men had reported that they were

37:54 made to penetrate someone during their lifetime.

38:00 Those who had been made to penetrate reported female perpetrators in 79% of cases.

38:07 Analysis of a national household survey of both rape and sexual assault found that 28%

38:13 of male victims and 4% of female victims reported female perpetrators acting alone.

38:21 When men and boys were incarcerated, staff perpetrators of sexual violence were overwhelmingly

38:26 female.

38:29 When inmate-on-inmate sexual assault occurs, women prisoners are more likely to be victimized

38:35 by female inmates than male prisoners victimized by male inmates.

38:41 Also, 6 offenders (6.6%) also sexually assaulted victims aged 19-45.

38:51 One offender abused a 65-year-old victim.

38:54 The number of victims was alarming.

38:56 70% of the men had committed offenses against 1-9 victims.

39:02 23% had committed offenses against 10-40 children.

39:07 7% had committed offenses against 41-450 children.

39:18 Selection of Victims Factors

39:23 Child's appearance (42%) being "pretty."

39:28 Wearing (27%) tights and miniskirts are mentioned.

39:34 Age or size (18%) young/small were significant factors.

39:41 Behavior (13%) 1 in 8 targeted naive, trusting, or unsuspecting kids.

39:50 Lack of confidence or low self-esteem (49%) "You can spot the child who is unsure of himself

39:58 and target him with compliments and positive attention."

40:03 Offenders share that they look for passive, quiet, troubled, lonely children from single-parent

40:11 or broken homes.

40:13 The "most vulnerable" child was described as having family issues, being alone, lacking

40:21 confidence, being curious, being attractively dressed, being trusting, and being young or

40:28 small.

40:30 57% selected based on the child being young or small.

40:37 46% influenced by a "special relationship" with the victim.

40:44 Recruitment of Victims Outside of Immediate Families

40:49 Victims frequented child-populated areas working on building trust in a child's home, took

40:54 chances when children approached them, and used victims to recruit others.

40:59 35% of men visited locations children commonly visit, including schools, shopping centers,

41:07 arcades, theme parks, playgrounds, parks, beaches, swimming areas, fairs.

41:20 33% aimed to gain acceptance into the child's household.

41:25 14% responded when a child initiated contact, possibly for an inquiry.

41:31 18% of men attempted to involve more kids.

41:35 These men used their victims to attract additional children.

41:39 "They did this by offering incentives to, or by threatening the victim, and by giving

41:44 bribes and gifts to the children recruited."

41:50 Location of Abuse Predominantly in the offender's or child's

41:55 home, but also included public places.

42:01 61% were abused in the offender's home.

42:06 49% in the child's home.

42:10 44% said they abused in public places—toilets, tents, parks, woodlands, places with outdoor

42:19 activities.

42:20 13% in the homes of friends.

42:24 6% in proximity of the offender's home.

42:29 4% in a car.

42:32 51% abused in the vicinity of the offender's home.

42:38 Strategies Used

42:39 53% Frequently they proposed engaging in games with the kids, coaching them in sports, or

42:47 instructing them in playing a musical instrument.

42:51 46% of individuals also provided bribes, offered them an outing, or gave them a ride home.

43:00 30% of individuals utilized sentiments of affection, comprehension, and love.

43:07 14% of the narratives recounted were centered around falsehoods, enchantment, or quests

43:14 for hidden riches.

43:16 9% of the perpetrators merely requested assistance from a child.

43:23 One man, for example, used his disability to ask children for help and gain their sympathy

43:28 before going on to sexually abuse them.

43:32 20% of the offenders asserted that they had managed to establish the trust of the entire

43:37 victim's family as a means to exploit the child.

43:42 48% of the perpetrators utilized babysitting as a means to isolate their victims, a fact

43:49 of considerable importance.

43:52 On these occasions the offenders started by talking about sex (27%), offering to bathe

43:58 or dress the child (20%), and/or using coercion by misrepresenting the abuse as having a different

44:06 purpose (21%), such as "it would be good for you to do this for your education" or "this

44:14 is what people do who love each other."

44:15 84% of the participants indicated that after devising a set of effective tactics, they

44:23 consistently employed the same approach when engaging with children, while 16% displayed

44:29 variability in their methods and altered their strategies periodically.

44:34 56% of the offenders were unsure about the factors that had impacted their strategy selection,

44:41 while 30% had derived their approaches from personal experiences and 14% attributed their

44:47 choices (at least in part) to influences like pornography, TV shows, movies, and other forms

44:55 of media.

44:59 First Move Made 28% slowly desensitized the child into sexual

45:06 activities, and 32% asked the child to do something that would help the offender, such

45:12 as undressing or lying down.

45:15 During the first sexual contact some men tried other methods or a combination of methods.

45:20 19% used physical force with the child, 44% of the men used coercion and persuasion, 49%

45:28 talked about sexual matters, 47% used accidental touch as a ploy, and 46% used bribery and

45:37 gifts in exchange for sexual touches.

45:42 If the child resisted or was fearful, 39% of the offenders were prepared to use threats

45:48 or violence to control the child as a way of overcoming the child's anxieties.

45:54 The other offenders, 61%, used passive methods of control such as stopping the abuse and

45:59 then coercing and persuading once again.

46:04 Therefore the majority of offenders coerced children by carefully testing the child's

46:08 reaction to sex, by bringing up sexual matters or having sexual materials around, and by

46:14 subtly increasing sexual touching.

46:20 During first sexual contact, 49% continued to talk about sex, 19% used physical force

46:28 straight away.

46:32 Maintenance of Victims

46:33 "One third of the offenders abused a child on only one occasion and then moved on to

46:39 another victim.

46:41 Two thirds of the offenders encouraged the child's compliance and maintained the abusive

46:44 relationship by using a variety and combination of methods."

46:50 Thirty-three percent specifically told the child not to tell, 42% portrayed the abuse

46:56 as education or as a game, 24% used threats of dire consequences, 24% used anger and the

47:05 threat of physical force, 20% threatened loss of love or said that the child was to blame.

47:13 One man said he told children that they would both be in trouble if the child told.

47:20 Offenders Preparation for the Abuse Immediately Prior to Offending

47:23 "Twenty-two percent of the men used drugs or alcohol, 21% used pornography, and 49%

47:36 used fantasies about previous victims to disinhibit themselves.

47:40 The other 8% contacted and talked to other offenders.

47:45 One in five offenders knew where to obtain child prostitutes and illegal child pornography,

47:50 videos and magazines.

47:52 Roughly 8% kept in contact with other child predators."

47:56 "Two thirds of offenders claimed that stress of some sort precipitated their offenses.

48:05 The stress was related to work, sexual or domestic problems, or to psychological problems,

48:12 but one third indicated no such stress."

48:18 Offenders' Feelings and Concerns About the Abuse

48:21 From the Offenders' Point of View

48:23 "Forty-one percent had found sex with children less threatening than sex with an adult.

48:31 Twenty-five percent felt that sex with children gave them a new and positive experience.

48:37 Thirty-nine percent felt nothing, or couldn't express what they felt, and seventeen percent

48:43 justified their actions to themselves.

48:46 What kept them from seeking help was the realization that there was no help available.

48:53 Forty-six percent, or that whatever they had tried hadn't helped.

48:58 Seventeen percent."

49:02 Offenders' Own History

49:03 "Sixty-seven percent admitted to negative sexual experiences as a child or adolescent.

49:11 The mean age for this negative experience was 12.5 years."

49:15 "A third of the men were under the age of 16 when first attracted sexually to children."

49:22 "All of these men committed their first offenses juveniles, one to three years after becoming

49:28 sexually attracted to children."

49:30 "The mean age of first conviction, however, was 31 years.

49:37 Fifty-five percent of the abusers said that their offenses became more serious over time."

49:42 "Sixty-eight percent were victims of sexual abuse as a child."

49:47 "The mean age of their own sexual abuse was 9.75 years."

49:56 From Powerful Perpetrators Hidden in Plain Sight An International Analysis of Organizational

50:01 (Child) Sexual Abuse Cases

50:03 2019

50:08 ELEVEN MAJOR GROOMING CATEGORIES

50:11 Prevention of grooming, a process where a person prepares a child, significant adults,

50:16 and the environment for child abuse.

50:19 Goals include gaining child access, compliance, and ensuring the child's secrecy.

50:28 Grooming organizations/staff, tactics for gaining trust within organizations, often

50:33 leveraging positions of power.

50:37 Grooming parents or guardians, techniques to gain trust from potential victims' parents,

50:41 such as doing favors for family members.

50:45 Accessing victims, ways to reach potential victims like volunteering at youth organizations

50:50 or overseeing children's field trips.

50:55 Grooming victims, strategies for gaining a child's trust before abuse, like befriending

51:01 or giving gifts.

51:04 Grooming victims, tempting a child into a location by offering rewards or through deceit.

51:12 Getting the child alone for abuse, tactics to isolate a child, such as sneaking into

51:18 their room.

51:20 Efforts to minimize detection, techniques to avoid being detected, like testing victims'

51:25 silence or denying abusive behavior.

51:31 Bribes and enticements for cooperation, offering victims tangible benefits or normalizing inappropriate

51:37 behavior to gain their cooperation.

51:41 Threats and coercion for cooperation, instilling fear in victims to ensure their participation

51:47 in abusive acts.

51:52 Bribes and enticements to maintain silence, offering benefits to victims to keep them

51:56 silent after the abuse.

52:01 Threats and coercion to maintain silence, threatening victims to ensure they don't

52:05 disclose the abuse.

52:10 From the 2021 MSU article, "Keeping Our Kids Safe."

52:14 Introduction.

52:15 Aim.

52:16 Educate parents/caregivers on ways to protect children/teens from sexual abuse.

52:24 Focus.

52:25 Understanding the grooming process by child sexual predators.

52:30 Understanding grooming.

52:32 Definition.

52:33 Deliberate actions by sexual predators to gain access to potential child victims.

52:39 Misconception.

52:41 Predators randomly pick children or only focus on strangers.

52:46 Reality.

52:48 Most predators know their victims and have some relationship with them.

52:53 Goals of grooming.

52:55 Access potential child victims.

52:58 Conceal their actions.

53:00 Minimize chances of being caught.

53:05 Grooming tactics.

53:07 Predators often follow a five-step process.

53:11 Identify vulnerable children.

53:13 Engage in peer-like activities with them.

53:18 Desensitize them to physical touch.

53:21 Isolate them emotionally and physically.

53:24 Make them feel responsible for any abuse.

53:29 Steps may not always be linear.

53:31 Predators can skip or combine steps.

53:36 Identifying vulnerable children.

53:39 Predators target children seeking attention.

53:43 Children with low self-esteem.

53:46 Socially struggling children.

53:49 Children with weak boundaries.

53:51 Kids in difficult family situations.

53:55 Kids eager to please adults.

53:58 Disabled children, especially with communication issues.

54:05 Engaging in peer-like involvement.

54:08 Predators engage in child-friendly activities like online games.

54:14 Struggle with appropriate boundaries.

54:17 Adopt hobbies to appeal to children.

54:20 Show more interest in children than adults.

54:24 Fail to act like adults when needed.

54:30 Desensitizing children to touch.

54:33 Gradual process.

54:35 Begin with innocuous touches, tickling, roughhousing.

54:39 Escalate the level of touch if unreported.

54:42 Pose intimate questions to desensitize further.

54:50 Isolating children emotionally and physically.

54:53 Tasks include keeping secrets with the child, providing material or

54:58 emotional support, exaggerating family issues, seeking opportunities

55:03 to be alone with the child.

55:08 Making children feel responsible for the abuse.

55:11 Predators make victims feel they "asked for" or "tempted them."

55:18 Incorporate victims into feeling responsible.

55:24 Peaceful parenting vs. predation.

55:27 Peaceful parenting first sets up a paradigm of open, curious and moral

55:31 behavior.

55:33 The children of peaceful parents trust their parents are open in their

55:36 communication and are so emotionally connected that the child cannot

55:40 hide any sudden dysfunctions and/or mood swings caused by external

55:46 abuse.

55:48 Predators scan for children emotionally isolated from their parents,

55:53 looking for those kids without close and loving connections to those

55:56 around them.

55:59 If they see a daughter in close, loving contact with her strong and

56:02 devoted father, they will move on to other prey.

56:09 Predators also look for children whose parents are stressed and

56:12 overwhelmed, often single mothers emotionally hanging by a thread.

56:19 The reason for this is that the children of a stressed parent will

56:22 not want to bring additional stresses into the parent's life and so

56:24 will tend to hide external abuse.

56:29 Also children with punitive parents will often hide external

56:32 grooming and/or abuse because they know that their parents will likely

56:36 punish the children, not the predators.

56:42 Abuse and single mothers

56:48 Earlier we talked about child abuse being twice as deadly as smoking.

56:55 That is, two times.

57:01 Earlier we talked about significant child abuse being twice as

57:06 deadly as smoking.

57:09 That is, two times.

57:12 What if there was a factor which raised the chance of childhood

57:16 sexual and physical abuse forty times?

57:22 Surely as a society we would be trumpeting this danger from the

57:24 rooftops.

57:28 For a comparison, if you had long-term concentrated exposure to

57:33 asbestos the increased risks of developing cancer from asbestos was

57:36 five hundred percent.

57:38 Five times!

57:41 Have you heard of the risks of asbestos?

57:44 Of course you have.

57:47 Smokers are ten times more likely to develop certain cancers than

57:50 non-smokers.

57:53 You know how dangerous smoking is, right?

57:56 Five times?

57:58 Ten times?

58:00 What about a risk that increased the physical and sexual abuse

58:04 against children by forty times?

58:09 Have you ever heard of that?

58:13 It's single mothers with new partners.

58:18 In the article "Child Abuse and Other Risks of Not Living with Both

58:21 Parents" published in Ethology and Sociobiology, Martin Daly and

58:25 Margo Wilson write, "If their parents find new partners, children

58:30 are forty times more likely than those who live with biological

58:33 parents to be sexually or physically abused."

58:39 According to a Missouri-based study of children living in homes

58:43 with non-related adults, children are "nearly fifty times as likely

58:48 to die of inflicted injuries as children living with two biological

58:52 parents."

58:53 Ah, but single mothers usually vote for bigger government, so to

58:57 heck with the children if it helps the power junkies, right?

59:07 Conclusion In conclusion, childhood sexual abuse is a

59:15 grave violation, a cruel theft of innocence.

59:21 As advocates of peaceful parenting, it is our duty to shine a light

59:25 on this dark corner of childhood.

59:30 By understanding its prevalence and grave harm, and by employing

59:33 the principle of peaceful parenting, we can strive to protect our

59:37 children, support survivors, and work towards a world where the

59:43 innocence of childhood remains untainted.

Peaceful Parenting Part 25

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