It seems that Dan was so unabashedly furious about the ending of Mass Effect 3 that he needed a wise sensei to reign in his anger. A teacher to show him the ways of channeling his fury into constructive activities. While the state requires at least 30 hours of such anger management, it doesn't specify who the teacher should be. So make a funny and grab your chopsticks, because we've got to decide who the best sensei for the job would be.
Don't forget, if you don't understand our decisions or want to have more of our material to complete your shrines to us, Mondays feature a new written companion piece titled No Right Explanation. We dare you to make less sense!