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    50 Shades of Grey provokes brown sauce attack

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    A British man attacked his girlfriend of five years with HP Sauce because she was reading 50 Shades of Grey. He felt the novel was too pornographic.

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    Raymond Hodgson, 31, was furious when he caught his girlfriend, Emma McCormick, reading the erotic E. L. James novel, 50 Shades of Grey. When she refused to stop reading the mommy porn book he punished her by squirting brown sauce in her face.

    The brown sauce, known as HP Sauce, is a spicy condiment popular in the UK. McCormick said the sauce stung her eyes and covered the walls, but she was okay.

    The judge sentenced Hodgson to a 6pm to 8am curfew for the next six weeks and six months of community service. He also had to pay the equivalent of a $286 dollar fine for court costs and damages. As if this didn't make the whole ordeal sound juvenile enough, both Hodgson and McCormick live with their respective parents. Pretty cool, huh?