Read online or Download The Tao of Martha : My Year of LIVING; Or, Why I'm Never Getting All That Glitter Off of the Dog by Jen Lancaster http://tinyurl.com/lwbxsnn
One would think that with Jen Lancaster’s impressive list of bestselling self-improvement memoirs— Bitter Is the New Black ; Bright Lights, Big Ass ; Such a Pretty Fat ; Pretty in Plaid ; My Fair Lazy ; and Jeneration X —that she would have it all together by now. One would be wrong. Jen’s still a little rough around the edges. Suffice it to say, she’s no Martha Stewart. And that is exactly why Jen is going to Martha up and live her life according to the advice of America’s overachieving older sister—the woman who turns lemons into lavender-infused lemonade. By immersing herself in Martha’s media empire, Jen will embark on a yearlong quest to take herself, her house, her husband (and maybe even her pets) to the next level—from closet organization to craft making, from party planning to kitchen prep. Maybe Jen can go four days without giving herself food poisoning if she follows Martha’s dictates on proper storage....Maybe she can grow closer to her girlfriends by taking up their boring-ass hobbies like knitting and sewing.…Maybe she can finally rid her workout clothes of meatball stains by using Martha’s laundry tips.… Maybe she can create a more meaningful anniversary celebration than just getting drunk in the pool with her husband....again. And maybe, just maybe, she’ll discover that the key to happiness does, in fact, lie in Martha’s perfectly arranged cupboards and artfully displayed charcuterie platters. Or maybe not. This item is Non-Returnable.