Important Historical Research has recently uncovered this here talkie picture of the origins of America's Favorite Passtime.
No, not beatin' off to a picture of the cheerleader you hit with your car while swiggin' you home brewed moonshine! Get out of here, Big Dumb Frank, nobody was talkin' to ya!
No, I'm talking about Baseball! The great equalizer. A gentleman's sport and a lady's sport as well, except not because this is history, where women weren't allowed to be. My how time's have changed. You know it used to be that a bottle of booze wouldn't run you but a dime. But you had to mint that dime yourself with what we called a Chinese person. What's that? You gotta go? Oh, don't mind me, I'm just a harmless old man confused by modern social standards and wibberjabbits.