LORE - Team Fortress 2: Mann vs. Machine Lore in a Minute!


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Dodger regales us with the lore of Team Fortress 2: Mann vs. Machine. IT HAS ROBOTS!

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Written by Phil

Voiced by Dodger

Edited by Schroeder

Art by D.J. "Metaly" Ross


LORE - Team Fortress 2: Mann vs. Machine Lore in a Minute!

We begin in 1850 when a wealthy Englishman, Zepheniah Mann, owner of Mann & Sons Co., is convinced by his idiot twin sons - Redmond and Blutarch - to purchase land in the United States to expand their company. Zepheniah Mann discovers that the gravel pits and dust bowls he purchased were useless and on top of that, he contracted various illnesses traveling to the United States. With his last will, which he wrote on his skin, he left his sons equal halves of his land, ensuring that they would fight over it for the rest of their lives.

To capture his brother's half, Blutarch hired 9 mercenaries but unbeknownst to him, Redmond had ALSO contracted exactly 9 mercenaries to do exactly the same thing. And for the next 40 years, they would engage in an endless war because neither brother was bright enough to, perhaps, hire more mercenaries. Blutarch, nearing death from old age, contracts expert craftsman Radigan Conagher to build a machine that would extend his life. However, Radigan was also convinced to build the same machine for Redmond by a stranger offering Australium, a rare and powerful element only found in Australia that turned a nation of savages into hyper-intelligent beings.

After fighting for decades, Redmond and Blutarch realize that they have no sons to carry on their family legacy. They put aside their differences and resolve to build a machine to get one of them pregnant, but not before Gray Mann reveals himself to be their long-lost brother, then murders them. Abducted as an infant and raised by eagles, Gray returns with a legion of deadly robots that run on piles of money and launches an all-out assault on Mann Co. and its CEO, Saxton Hale.

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