Eric Schwartz

The Mayan calendar predicted December 21, 2012 as the end of the world, but the Psychic Mayan Rapper predicts every major event this year in this recently found, ancient footage. Ordinary year-end "wrap ups" or "rap ups" take note--the Notorious PMR has scooped you by thousands of years!Get your Smooth-E merch! http://www.SmoothE.tv‬Don't forget to Subscribe! http://www.youtube.com/user/suburbanhomeboy‬Follow Me on Twitter! http://twitter.com/ericschwartz‬Like me on Facebook! http://www.facebook.com/ericschwartz‬Leave me a message! (323) 379- ERIC (3742)Instagram me! @eeericschwartzWritten, produced, performed and edited by Eric Schwartz: http://www.youtube.com/suburbanhomeboyShot and Directed by Eric Lombart : http://www.youtube.com/familysandwich‬Makeup by Desiree V. Castro: http://www.youtube.com/dezproductionzHawk Costume by Mikiko Nagao, MKO Costumes: http://www.mkocostumes.comLYRICS:You may have heard that the Mayans predicted the end of the world on December 21, 2012. Well, that's not all we predicted, motherf**ker![INTRO]I'm the psychic Mayan rapper and for what it's worthI will foretell about 2012, the last year on EarthThere's a lot of things about our culture that you do not knowLike, we rap, in English and shoot videosI'm making these predictions in three hundred B.C.When nobody but me knows what B.C. meansJust your average Toltec psychic from Chichen ItzaRhyming 'bout the future over hardcore beats-uh[CHORUS]He's the psychic Mayan Rapper, what you gon do?Everything he forsees always comes trueHis predictions are specific, yeah he always comes throughSo listen what he says about the twenty one-two[VERSE 1]The year will start with the birth of a childBlue Ivy name protected, copyright filedFive British boys, girls lose their witsThey'll all go one direction, but which way it is?A naked man will paint himself and tears will fallHis ex girlfriend magically appears from a wallA woman famous just for having sexWill trade a white dress for a Kanye WestSweet, sweet Swift too many hits to count themEach boyfriend has a song about themMusic will sound a little oddDouble time beats with a wah-wah-wahA Lady named Gaga will put a few pounds onNom nom nom nom nom....A Korean man with mystical forcesWill make the world ride on invisible horses[CHORUS]He's the psychic Mayan Rapper, what you gotta say?He knows that you're listening to this todayCan't beat him in cards, you can't beat him in chessCause he knows everything, 'bout what's happening next[VERSE 2]Female shyness will fade awayDissolved into a page of 50 shades of grayThey'll lose all inhibitions for the price of admissionTo a magician named Mike whose biggest trick is strippin'The people will name him sexiest aliveBut a general will have the most sex to hideA social network will go publicBut have a hard time finding thumbs to up itA movement to stop an bad dude will be skewedWhen its creator gets loopy and dances nudeThe word meme will become a memeBut people still won't know exactly what it meansA black man, re-elected for four yearsA rich man still won't admit he was born hereEven his friends will say, "shut up with that old fear"How do you have so much money but never have a comb near?[CHORUS]He's the Psychic Mayan Rapper, always dead onNever been a premonition that he's ever read wrongYeah, you wanna shake his hand, wanna give him a kissToo bad he'll be dead by the time you hear this[BRIDGE]The Walking Dead will move you stronglyBut Boo Boo Child will turn you into zombiesBeiber, Selena...will be throughWhen he pukes on stage, now he swags on youThe Middle East will become unrulyAnd everybody's bracelet will read "I Love Boobies."A prince reveals his crown jewels in a photoYou only live once, that's the motto, YOLO[VERSE 3]You might see a spaceship wandering your blockAnd a spaceship on Mars create a famous mowhawkA picture of avenging heroes will go fartherAnd a mouse will become Luke's new father (Mickey: I'm your father!)For the Jersey Shore, things won't seem fairOne bad situation leaves and another appears(Contrast of Hurricane Sandy and the cancellation of "Jersey Shore," i.e. "The Situation")A human fish will win gold's bestWhile a fallen acrobat with be "not impressed"Penn State football -- epic failAnd no, that guy never gets out of jailA famous bakery will close down cause tearsBut its Twinkies won't expire for hundreds of years.Dead-eyed refs will need to check their vitalsA man who lost a testicle will lose his titlesBad accusations makes you scream "Hell no!"Picket signs that reading "Free Elmo!"He's the Psychic Mayan Rapper, ain't no disguiseHistory is written straight from his mindK nows everything that's happenin' can't be surprisedHe'll keep makin predictions til the Earth diesPsychic Mayan Rapper!

I want you to come to GRINGO DE MAYO at Irvine Improv May 5 so badly that I dressed up in a sarape and sombrero and learned one of the hardest mariachi songs of all time. I'm either desperate or a genius. Either way, come to the show.

http://www.SmoothE.tv - This year, Superbowl is all about the LADIES! The Mos Valuaba Playaz (Smooth-E and J-Ro) compete to see who has the most game. Executive Producer: Jason Rosen Written by: Eric Schwartz aka Smooth-E and Jason Rosen aka J-Ro Directed by: Snehal Patel of www.fearlessproductions.tv Crew Lester Schwartz Jon Crawford Girls Caroline Heinle Katie Fischer Kitty Lee Yasmin Spain Shot on the Canon 5D MarkII

http://www.smoothE.tv Please quit the knit. Written, produced and performed by Eric Schwartz aka Smooth-E. Directed and edited by Snehal Patel.

Jason gives Assistant Eric a very special camera that leads him on an adventure he'll never forget. You can only imagine where this one will go! Written by: Eric Schwartz Directed and Produced by: Snehal Patel and Eric Schwartz Edited by: Snehal Patel Costumes/Makeup: Desiree Castro Director of Photography: Jeff Murphy Production Assistant: Christina Padilla

http://www.SmoothE.tv. Do you like it raw? Written by: Eric Schwartz Directed and Produced by: Snehal Patel and Eric Schwartz Edited by: Snehal Patel Costumes/Makeup/Production Design: Desiree Castro Director of Photography: Jeff Murphy Production Assistant: Christina Padilla

I got a dream gig as Jason Mraz's assistant. He's always been an inspiration to me, and now I get to do things like wipe his cat's ass. Watch the first in a new series we created for Jason's Gratitude Cafe Tour called "Grati-Tube."

Is this the next chapter in Billy Bob vs. Canada?

Smooth-E ambushes the OctoHome to prove he is the REAL OctoDad. Directed by Snehal Patel for http://www.fearlessproductions.tv Comedian Eric Schwartz aka Smooth-E has become a regular on the front pages of YouTube and Myspace with hits like "Crank That Kosha Boy," "A Milli Vanilli" and "Lean Like a Gringo." One of the nation's hottest rising stand-up headliners, Eric Schwartz aka Smooth-E and his music have appeared on "The Tonight Show with Jay Leno," BET's "Comic View," Showtime's "White Boyz in the Hood," Mun2, SiTV and more. Radio jocks across the country regularly incorporate Smooth-E into their shows, including Rick Dees (Weekly Top 40), Shorty and the Boyz (95.7 The Vibe, Kansas City), Keith Brooks (100.5 The Zone, Sacramento) and AJ's Playhouse (Channel 933, San Diego).

http://www.smoothE.tv Grab a "Parodies Nuts!" CD/DVD now! Smooth-E vs. Rick Dees, legendary host of "The Weekly Top 40" (http://www.rick.com) Featuring Rick Dees and Eric Schwartz aka Smooth-E Directed by Snehal Patel of http://FearlessProductions.tv Camera by Jeff Murphy. "Parodies Nuts!" is a 28-track CD and 25-video DVD in one package. This sack full of jewels has already gripped radio, TV and the web, with 15 million online views. Smooth-E has become a regular on the front pages of YouTube and Myspace with hits like "Crank That Kosha Boy," "A Milli Vanilli" and "Lean Like a Gringo." One of the nation's hottest rising stand-up headliners, Eric Schwartz aka Smooth-E and his music have appeared on "The Tonight Show with Jay Leno," BET's "Comic View," Showtime's "White Boyz in the Hood," Mun2, SiTV and more. Radio jocks across the country regularly incorporate Smooth-E into their shows, including Rick Dees (Weekly Top 40), Shorty and the Boyz (95.7 The Vibe, Kansas City), Keith Brooks (100.5 The Zone, Sacramento) and AJ's Playhouse (Channel 933, San Diego).